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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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How to help bfs relax? Anonymous 30498

I have an autistic boyfriend who I've gotten into college so he can get a degree and finally put his head to use career wise and get out of dead end jobs. He's fantastic with computers and doing well but pushing himself incredibly hard with part time jobs and clubs. Just wanting advice for things I could do. Yes I know sex is obvious but what else? He doesn't like being touched sometimes so I could think of.
>cooking him a nice meal
>watching something he likes
>playing video games
I feel really anxious that he might burn out so I just want to help.

Anonymous 30545

ask him about anything he could be interested in. It always feels nice to know someone is willing to listen to something you're interested it. Just let him know you care about his wellbeing.

Anonymous 30658

you can leave just…

I'd encourage him to take time off from one of his activities. He can always go back to it, but it might be good for his sanity to lighten his load. There's probably at least one that's non-mandatory that has a high rate of hassle compared to what he gets out of it. Might be a club, a high-maintenance friendship, anything that's draining, if it's not an absolute requirement for his degree or survival, it might be a good time for him to do pic related.

Does he get enough alone time? Sometimes the best thing you can do is give him space. Maybe you could help him set up an area in his house or apartment that's like a comfy nest. Pillows, soft materials, soft light for reading, whatever he finds pleasant to the senses. You could make it so that if he wants to be alone he has a place to retreat to, but leave enough room in case he needs to go there but also wants you next to him. If he hasn't tried weighted blankets, that might be an option too. They even have them at Target now.

Source: am autistic, dropped out of college from stress

PS you're a good girlfriend

Anonymous 30669

Thank you for the feedback. I'll try talking to him about your suggestion and see what he thinks. Thanks for the complement, I've really needed that lately.

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