Self isolation is putting a strain on me and my family. I started going to GED school after being a shut in for 6 years. I made actual friends for the first time in years and now all of that has been taken away from me. In a psychotic ep I ripped all my posers down last night and now I can’t stand to look at my room. My dad chases me out and told me not to talk to him for the rest of the night cause I told him instead of putting my frozen phone on the charger, we should let it die.He hit me for the first time in a while cause he was shining a light in my face and I didn’t even mean to hit him that hard. He called me a little bitch and other things. Then wanted me to say I’m sorry. Now my rooms ugly and gross without all it’s stuff on the walls and I just want to sleep. I ruined my perfectly good room over my stupid dad
Also, I feel like as if there’s no point in being here anymore. I’m tired of living the same, sad and dull life. Who cares. I hate myself anyway.
OP, take a look at r/raisedbynarcissists and r/CPTSD on Reddit. They have a lot of good advice and you can vent to people who will know what you're going through (but keep your post shortish if you want replies).
OP here finally going onto this thread. I feel the same, but I say don’t give up. There’s no point in just giving up when things might get better.
Op. Thank you! I also dropped out at 12. You give me lots of fucking hope man. Thank you.
Thank you! I’ll check it out
>take a look at r/raisedbynarcissists and r/CPTSD
A lot of the posts there describe my family and upbringing. Everything is lies and trying to placate them, I didn't realize how fucked up that was until I read some of the posts on those subs.
You might find r/narcissisticabuse helpful as well which focuses on narcs outside your family (usually dating)
The unfortunate truth is that child abuse occurs far more often than people believe.