Was anyone here ever obsessed with BL / MxM relationships? Were you ever OK with the idea of the character you fawned over being with a guy, but got mad when they were with a female romantically?
This feeling rises in me from time to time when I watch a drama, it's so confusing…
fujoshi's daily li…
Anon, you're a fujoshi now. Congrats and welcome to the club, just be true to yourself.
No but seriously I'm a fujoshi (not particularly obsessed though I suppose) but I like shipping in general so I don't always get dislike when a male character I like ends up with a woman. Are you thinking about any specific pairings here?
I'm not 'obsessed' but it's just the natural way for me to ship. Why ship het couples when I can ship two people I'm actually attracted to? I'm only ever gonna be sexually/romantically attracted to one half of a het relationship, and I'm not a self inserter. I don't really care about them having female love interests, that's just the norm. It only bothers me when we get hardcore baited or the female character is bland waifubait/their relationship is boring. It's not jealousy, I just get bothered that homophobia prevents writers from making the characters with the best dynamic/chemistry a canon couple, solely because they're the same sex. Pic related would rustle my jimmies for sure.
I used to be, but then grew to realize I'm just really into pegging. and then I also made my own characters so the girls wouldn't be shit/someone I'd be jealous of.
Generally in media though, and especially anime, I still end up shipping two men if the source material is male-centric (i.e. sports anime). Or yuri if it's female-centric.
Not saying it's the same with you, in fact your reasoning seems pretty sound for what outcome you're looking for. I'd say as long as you're respectful towards real people it's no issue.
I wouldn't say obsessed, but yeah, I quite enjoyed mah yawis. I did grow out of it a bit (mainly when I got a boyfriend and could fulfill my horniness better), but I would be lying if I said I don't eventually go dokidoki when I see BL. Just not as the same level it used to be, though.
Now, I never got angry at the canon het pairing or whatever, I just think that's too stupid even for me
maybe it's because when it's 2 dudes, you were never part of the equation as a female. but if it's the dude you like with another girl, you may start feeling jealous and compare yourself to her. like, if he's into dudes then it's not that he wouldn't like you because you're you, it's because he prefers dudes. but if it's a girl, then you are forced to face the reasons that he would choose this particular girl and how different you are from her
i had a phase in highschool because i was full of internalized misogyny and self hatred. i also was going through an edgy phase and boys didn't like me in real life, so reading f/m stuff made me bitter. i eventually grew out of it and i don't remember how. now if i want to fantasize i just imagine myself with a character or actor.
I've seen a lot of fujoshi that clearly have issues with internalized misogny or have general insecurities wrt their gender or sexuality.
Welcome to the fujo club anon.
I used to be really into BL/yaois back in the day, not as much anymore. (wasn't one of the crazy or vocal ones tho, just really liked seeing guys being cute together).
IMO Yaois/BL in general tend to be written by women for women or with women in mind so they are "easier" to relate, appreciate and to "click" with us than some romance manga written by a dude trying to think like a woman for what we like in men.
Plus, another reason imo is that men try to be super masculine and don't show emotion with one another because "no homo", so when any kind of media depicts them as vulnerable, sensible, cute and loveable with one another it turns into a big attraction for women.
And to add, for some women, especially seen in obsessive kpop fans, a man they are attracted to being attracted to another man or flirting with men means that she had no opportunities with him to begin with so they accept that and actually enjoy the pairing, while if they are with a woman it often turns into jealously because "i had an opportunity and this woman took it from me" (sorry if this makes no sense, i'm kinda shit at explaining).
tho, i never got angry if a pairing i liked ended up with a girl or on a canonically straight relationship, that seems a tad excessive.
f/m stuff used to make me bitter and jealous if that wasn't my characters or some bland self insert, though it was more about self hatred and less about misogyny
but at the same time i was extremely uncomfortable with male bodies so i liked them as feminine and stylized as possible
all that fujo stuff is a perfect way to get off without having to face your insecurities n shit
I never found it really appealing, tbh- if a male character that I liked had a relationship/bond of any kind with a girl, it was way easier to just project onto her, not throw in a boy to fawn over the two of them. Which is probably the deal with Western girl-oriented shows, and I kind of just dragged it along for anime. I see where you guys come from, though.
When I was in middle school I was really into Yaoi. Not so much anymore. I sometimes ship two guy characters upon occasion but nothing much besides that. Still enjoy a story every now and then too. I think a lot of women into anime probably went through some cringy yaoi phase when they were 13/14. I remember a couple of weebs at my school being so into it they'd have the guts to bring yaoi manga to class and share their fanfics. I was never that bad at least lol.
>>13167>IMO Yaois/BL in general tend to be written by women for women or with women in mind so they are "easier" to relate, appreciate and to "click" with us than some romance manga written by a dude trying to think like a woman for what we like in men.
I don't understand this. Most actual romance manga were/are written by women. I would not go to shounen battle manga #324 for their thrown in half-assed romance arcs, but idk.
Oh wow, i fucked that thought completely lol.
I meant the kind of mangas you said, with half assed thrown in romances written by men in very unnapealing ways.
I wasn't talking about actual shojo mangas since those have basically the same appeal as yaoi/shounen ai imo.
Ah okay, I understand what you mean now.
But, I wasn't necessarily talking about shoujo manga either. Manga with romance being the central theme are overwhelmingly written by women. Even ones with a male protag, are liked and well regarded by even males sometimes. (Like Koe no Katachi, off the top of my head).
I don't disagree though, that romances written by men strongly favor the MPDG type.
In my case I never felt like it was internalized misogyny or anything like that. I got into BL in middle school/high school because at the time I was into manga and anime that barely had female characters or the female characters were badly written or not interesting (like in Naruto for example). So I shipped the guys together because they were more relevant and interesting. If I wanted to see interesting female characters I read shojo manga and I never really shipped the male characters together in these series. I mean, I'm still into BL and shipping any sort of pairings in general but les than before so maybe in my case it still can be called a phase, idk.
When you say internalized misogyny, were you aware of it at the time or did you only realize after getting into BL? I'm curious, I feel like it's common for a lot of girls I talked to.
im just passionate shipping in general, but yeah im into BL pairings if the characters are interesting and cute, the only way id be mad if a male character got a gf was if it was random and forced for the ending of the series.
you know what sucks is that the only place to discuss fandoms is tumblr, which has turned into a place obsessed with 'justice' policing every 'bad' pairing and girls becoming fakebois in order to not be harrassed about wanting to see cute anime guys fuck
ive never had 'weeb' friends to talk to about this stuff and it really bums me out.
i know most people cringe about their 12yr old weeb yaoi fangirl years where they would obsess with their friends but i really wish i couldve had that.
>>13204>girls becoming fakebois in order to not be harrassed about wanting to see cute anime guys fuck
It's weird that there are tumblr users who're unironically putting BL fans on the same level as pedophiles now.
Iirc it started on tumblr with actual gay guys and a few fujoshi saying that some of the extremely socially awkward yaoi fangirls were annoying during anime cons, that yaoi isn't realistic and should just be seen as entertainment made by women for women and that reblogging gifs of Superwholock ships wasn't activism.
Then fakebois, who typically call themselves gay or bi or pan and who love M/M under the pretense of "representation", took that opportunity to take it further and make it all about themselves to keep saying they were men and that yaoi not being realistic was offensive and fetishization (even though the ones being fetishized in that case were actual men and not transtrenders). They also started claiming that cis gay men were problematic and privileged for some reason, at least until the shooting in a gay bar in the USA.
Since these fakebois/fujoshi in denial started harassing teenage girls pretty badly for, gasp, being attracted to unrealistic fictional male characters (while also posting about how harassing people is bad), these girls pretend to be fakebois as well. And it keeps going because nobody on tumblr as a once of self-awareness. Oh and since it looks like all the actual gay or bi men who were in fandoms on tumblr left, the only people I see complain about yaoi are girls or women who say they're trans gay boys uwuwu while not trying to pass at all.
It's been a while since I left tumblr but I remember that it got worse around the time were medievalpoc and yourfaveisproblematic were really popular. I don't remember when yourfaveisproblematic started to be seen more as a joke than a reliable source but maybe it can still be a clue.
I wish people stopped caring about fake activism and SJW shit and could just enjoy their hobbies like normal people without harassing each others but well, that's the internet for you I guess.
I've seen idiot bloggers like thewoesofyaoi actually try to say that gay porn is made for fujoshi. they really think gay men are all pure mlems who aren't sexual at all
Oh yeah, I've seen that recently, it was hilarious. Someone explained that they were wrong by using reliable data and statistics but I don't remember her(?) reaction after that. I really wonder why people like them take things like this so personally.
I've seen another blogger saying she was a dysphoric gay man and that yaoi was problematic and that fujoshi should die because they jeopardize gay men's safety and plot twist, she turned out to not be dysphoric enough to try to pass for a man nd she's into mlm fiction. I think her url was boyonetta. She was posting some disturbing things about fujoshi when I found her blog so I can't find her posts right now.
Anyway I think it's funny how there seems to be different generations or at categories of fujoshi. I'm young, in my early 20s, but I can't stand the younger ones in fandoms, I find them obnoxious, and not in a way where they can be laughed at as much as the fujoshi who would hit people with yaoi paddles, if that makes sense. I think it's because they try to virtue signal more than talk about their ships and other things.
I had an intense fujoshi phase from about 12-15 years old. I'm bi and growing up I was really confused about my sexuality, I was really fearful of my attraction to women, I think this fear really pushed me into this obsession with male homo-eroticism.
Not obsessed but I used to read it a lot as a lonely teen, and sometimes still do when I'm feeling extra shitty.
Mostly because the 'man' in the relationship is usually depicted as gentle and loving towards the 'bottom' guy, and I didn't experience that for a long, long time
I like MxM because it's easier to detach myself from the characters, otherwise I would end up unwittingly identifying with the girl in the story and if something bad happened to her it wouldn't feel very nice at a time when I'm using it as a form of escapism. If that makes sense. Female characters in stories always make me anxious for that reason.
I am a BL fan, but f/f, f/m, m/m I like all equally. I just love love stories.
I am a big frog shipper though. If my ship don't become canon-canon it's okay, so long as they remain each other's most important person and it's friendly to the idea of them being more.
What I hate is when a couple I'm invested in end up with other people. I always dislike the "rival" ships, and if they're OTP enough and it happens in canon I usually stop following it. I don't know why. Shipping psychology is weird.
This picture is a masterpiece. I'm a turtle fujo btw.
i'm so confused by this picture. what is a fixed ship? a bicycle? what does turtle fujoshi even mean? help.
Snake>favorite bottom character is always bottom>doesn't care who top is
("bicycle" = "everyone takes a ride on it")
Slug>favorite pairing with fixed roles (bottom is always bottom)
Frog>favorite pairing but roles don't matter
Turtle>doesn't really care what it is as long as they like it
I don't really understand Gecko and Snail though.
I tried to get off this boat once but it seems almost impossible for me. I have a lot of fun with BL but when I'm self aware about it I become sad and depressed.
Besides MxM, I like FxM but I hate yuri. I can't stand it. Unless it's supposed to be funny and cute like Yuru Yuri.
No idea, maybe it's just a preference of mine. I don't think it's gross and I don't hate female characters, It's just the idea of them being lovers (in a sexual way or not) doesn't sit well with me.
I agree. I'll post the rest.>>13317>>13318
Snail is not about shipping but about porn of your favourite with tentacles, having anonymous sex, that sort of thing.
I don't understand gecko either. Just fans of semes?
Took me some time to understand but I'm definitely a turtle.
I used to be the sort of fujoshi that really likes shipping characters but isn't really into the porn/doujinshi aspect of yaoi.
However, now I no longer ship characters with the exception of my one favorite ship, and have devolved into just reading yaoi hentai manga and doujinshi. It very rarely arouses me, either, it's more habit now than anything. I just keep up with my favorite mangakas (mainly Harada) and read whatever new stuff has come out. I'm not sure why this shift has taken place.
What's even weirder is that I'm a lesbian, I have zero attraction to men. I have an anime husbando whom I love dearly, but I don't have any sort of sexual attraction to him, I just think he's a wonderful character. Is anyone else the same, or am I just weird?
>>13591>Harada>picture of Gintoki and Hijikata>the anime thread on /media/ has a picture of that hellish doujinshi about both these dudes and the wall>mfw I can't escape from the hell
No I never minded. I love it when there's a girl actually. Its even better to me. She can't be some pickme bitch though, she's gotta be cool.
I've always wanted to understand how this works just to feed my curiosity. I have a hard time believing you don't like-like your favorite character. How does that work? Then why are you reading bl?
Not that anon obviously, but I feel similarly to her.
I think for many women, especially those who aren't attracted to men but I've seen this play out in plenty of straight or bi girls as well, it's about enjoying the dynamics of the relationship rather than being attracted to the characters themselves. I definitely am interested in shipping more because of that than out of some romantic or sexual feeling towards the people involved. I like them together, and often don't like them with me.
I used to read yaoi a lot when I was younger. Really liked it because "the more the merrier" and also, even though I didn't fully realize it at the time, because the relationships didn't seem as disgustingly unequal as they do in straight romance.
However, male characters that were attracted to women had a certain "spice" to them for me. They seemed… cuter, and less weighed down by all the drama and whininess you find in BL sometimes. So I started to seek out that stuff more and more.
Nowadays I read hetero stuff almost exclusively. But I usually search for works with cute male leads, instead of the typical shoujo douchebags.
Yaoi kind of disgusts me now. Although I do read doujinshi sometimes.
There are a few really good authors, but so much of it is just hot garbage. It seems at least as misogynistic and violent as normal manga. Once it occurred to me that the uke is often basically treated as a stand-in for the female lead, it started to make me feel ill.
So much BDSM, rape and other horrible contents.