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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Check the Catalog before making a new thread.
Do not respond to maleposters. See Rule 7.
Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

check-list-4609829…

Anonymous Admin 49939[Reply]

Do not make threads about the following topics or you will be banned:


- Race/Ethnicity/Nationality (including stereotypes & preferences)
- Religion
- (Why) do guys…
- (Why) do you like guys who [insert preference here]
- (Why) do guys like [insert preference here]
- how to get a bf/gf (who does xyz)
- Any fetish/kink talk

If you want to talk about Radfem/TERF/Gendercritical themes, do not make a new thread. Post in the existing threads on /b/ and keep discussion civil.

Use the catalog.


ea02f494b59f085172…

Nice Guys Anonymous 112773[Reply]

"Nice" guys are always some of the most dangerous men out there. Yes yes violent criminals yadda yadda but we're talking average joe here, not convicts (though you see how some do end up in that category too). Most women aren't going to interact with a serial rapist, but they WILL likely bump elbows with or even befriend/date a "nice guy"

I always think of the quote from Nietzsche: "Hilarious are the weak who think they are virtuous because they have no claws."

It's not about remaining "pure and good" but about knowing what you'd do when you're tested. These men develop unchecked "benevolent sexism" or what I might call Misogyny of the Devotee (aka men who worship women as objects/idols but do not respect or see then as people). They all have a transactional attitude about things, probably in part because of absorbed masculine money-car-bitches culture where the right numbers mean you got it. They deal too much with the material and get stuck in it when they're denied the presence of women for whatever reasons. It's a shame, but karmas karma I guess. Cause and effect. They're left without and this unfettered sexism ferments beneath their doting, servile attitudes until it breaks on the edge of unmet expectations. Entitled, needy, predatory. Constant messaging like attrition warfare. Virtue signaling cutesy sweet hobbies or memes or clothes to read as "safe". They lie and are so unassumingly judgey/angry people. So scary. They buy women with their time in porn and with money paying for games/movies or more porn/streamers. They think this is how it should be with real women. Buy the upgraded skin pack to impress the lady. Complete the quest. Defend her against the dragon. Get your princess. Insufferable men. They masquerade as weak when they have an iron core of ego and superiority to compensate for a deeper emptiness.

Anyone here have any fucked up nice guy stories/experiences?

Anonymous 112783

1713736606497290.j…

>>112773

Anonymous 112841

All relationships are transactional to begin with, you don't love someone unconditionally the moment you first meet. The problem with "nice guys" is they are naive, their view of women is based on anime, porn, internet echo chambers and "redpill" tweets and YT videos.


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Abusive OCD bf pt 2 Anonymous 95617[Reply]

>>>/feels/34633
Last thread hit limit and many nonas seem concerned for her safety.

If you see this, we hope you are ok! Please give us an update on the police situation.
86 posts and 7 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112278

>>112249
Antipsychotics are prescribed for severe OCD. Well, that would have been the one thing that could have made living with him more bearable, but if he’s not adherent definitely don’t invite him to live with you again.

Anonymous 112356

>>112278
I'm trying. It's hard to mive on from soneone who has been such a big part of my life.

I told him I'm not moving back but I would consider it if he gave proof he's at least seeing a therapist, admits he has been abusive, and can show he's changed.He wants to go to therapy together and I said okay, but again I'm not moving back any time soon.

Then he asked me if I was having trouble sleeping and I just told him truthfully "No. I'm way less stressed because I don't have to deal with (all his abusive behavior) and I'm not crying every day. I can do (conpletely normal things like watch tv and go for walks) when I want to. It's awesome."

He hasn't replied and I have to wonder if he realizes he just reminded me shy divorce is the best option.

Anonymous 112462

Now he's asking me if there aremen living with me because if so I'm "breaking the law." lol. I can't believe I used to let this kind of behavior control me. I still don't have a concrete plan but keeping communication open with him is actually reminding why I left and keeping me from romanticizing things.

Anonymous 112821

OP again. He wants money for food and utility bills so I said I would give him some, but he keeps refusing to tell me how much he needs. I'm pretty sure he's trying to get me to meet him multiple times so we can convince me to come back. He hasn't done tge one thing I asked him to do (go to therapy) so I won't.

He's surprised that I had the forethought to bring all my important documents, get housing set up, etc. He literally thinks I'm retarded. He's upset because I didn't tell him I was going to leave. I did! I told him, in tears, that he was abusing me and making life hell. I told him almost every day "If you don't stop, I'm going to leave." and "One day I'm not going to come home." which he says he doesn't remember, despite always bragging to me that he has a photographic memory.

Once again reminding me why I was stupid to consider givibg him another chance.

I'm trying to work on building carreer skills and look into jobs I could get if I decided to go back to the us.

Anonymous 112840

>>112821
Anon block him already.. you don't need his dumbass messages to remind you why you should stay seperated, you've got two threads full of anons yelling at you to leave him.

Don't give him money, treat this man as a stranger.


__kagamine_rin_voc…

Anonymous 112839[Reply]

I have ruined everything because of my stupid actions. Everything I do just causes harm to me, every single of them.

sexualdimorphism.j…

sexual dimorphism and diet Anonymous 112769[Reply]

why does it seem like sexual dimorphism fails at enhancing both genders? like, if a country produces tall men, they must also produce tall women. or vice versa. that's kind of sad. i feel like in an ideal world, all the women would be tiny and the men would be muscley and bear like. it's just hawt, i dunno.

i can only really imagine that maybe diet can enhance both genders' sexual dimorphism. apparently, sexually dimorphic diets do exist in nature, with the siberian ibex's (a type of wild goat) eating behaviors containing more biomass, while the female siberian ibex eats lesser foods, but with higher nutritional quality. it's interesting to think how sexually dimorphic behaviors evolve in different species of animals, and how humans have unconsciously (or consciously) adopted these types of behaviors as well.
7 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112785

>>112769
>i feel like in an ideal world, all the women would be tiny and the men would be muscley and bear like. it's just hawt, i dunno.

I know it's not a popular opinion around here but, I feel the exact same.

I feel like humans are, in practice, a lot more sexually dimorphic than what our naked biological forms show because we typically deliberately make ourselves even more masculine/femenine with choice of clothing, hairstyle, conscious choice of behaviour and voice tone, etc. There's even makeup, choice of gym activity (weights vs cardio) and stuff like that too.

I think we haven't physically become like peacocks or gorillas with even more pronounced default sexually dimorphic physical forms because intelligence and making and using inventions has just been too strong of a sexual strategy over the millennia.

Anonymous 112801

>>112769
it’s advantageous for males and females of the same species to consume similar resources because that way they can share them. obv there’s gonna be a lot of animals that go against that, but for mammals and birds and such it’s generally true just because of their mating strategies

Anonymous 112822

>>112776
>Unfortunately it seems that in real life an overwhelming supermajority of men instinctively prefer taller women over shorter women, and have to be socially conditioned out of this preference by a wave of formative sexual rejections from taller and generally older women during puberty
This is the weirdest nonsense I have ever read. Men have always preferred shorter women.

Anonymous 112823

>>112822
When men say that they mean 1 to 2 inches shorter than themselves. They do not care that this sounds like they want someone shorter compared with other women.

https://www.enkirelations.com/ideal-height-for-women.html
>Men who are taller than 6’0” generally prefer women of about 5’8” to 5’11”, while shorter men in the range of 5’8” to 5’11” tend to prefer women in the same height bracket.
Very, very few women are above 5'7". And yet somehow that 1.5% of the population of women by height receive numerically as many swipes as women whose height matches 30% of the population, meaning that being significantly above average provides 20x the attention.
https://www.standard.co.uk/lifestyle/dating/most-attractive-height-for-man-woman-a3846246.html

Obviously there's more to life than dating apps. And that means more spaces in which tall women have a serious advantage. Tall women can reasonably expect to get away with murders for which shorter women would be convicted:
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/263765529_Mock_Juror_Gender_Biases_and_Perceptions_of_Self-Defense_Claims_in_Intimate_Partner_Homicide
And get significantly better pay and more frequent promotion along the way:
https://www.petitepoire.ca/being-petite/advocacy/short-women-make-less-money-being-petite-in-the-workplace.html

Anonymous 112838

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A common theory is that there was less selective pressure for women. When women were pregnant it was up to the man to wait at a watering hole, hurl a javelin and chase down injured game over 15 miles in the hot sun, so the survival of their child depended more on the man's performance. Evolutionary psychology seems to be a point of contention among feminists, but I see the logic in this.

However at the olympics men are only about 10% faster in the 100m and the marathon while 40% stronger in weightlifting. Strength seems to be more significant, while the extra power and range using weapons is useful in hunting, there might have been selective pressure due to tribal warfare or perhaps controlling women and social dominance. There are certainly some grim elements of human nature, on the internet the edgiest theories will float to the top, though I'd like to know the truth. I'd rank all this as speculation.


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Anonymous 112764[Reply]

im tired. I will never get taken serious BY MY FAMILY (put it in caps bc i think this only applies to my family :( if you are struggling like me you should seek help, really you are valid trust me.) when it comes to my ED, they just see me as someone insecure and make fun of me for that. They never took me serious because i have been maintaining for long, there was a point i lost 7kg within just 2 weeks and they got really worried but after i started maintaining they stopped caring and they just bodyshame me still im struggling so bad i dont know why they cant see it are they just ignoring me?? Im so confused. How do i get them to TAKE ME SERIOUS without losing a crazy shit amount of weight
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112788

>>112787
thank you, for your respond. Your right

Anonymous 112794

Losing weight to get attention is so cringe

Anonymous 112798

>>112794
Its not for attention. I just want them to take my ED serious ive been struggling with MIA for 2 years

Anonymous 112805

>>112798
I'm ngl if you are able to lose 7kg in two weeks at all it means you're still relatively healthy..

Anonymous 112837

>>112805
There are other EDS than anorexia. Most people with bulimia are in the healthy weight range but that doesnt mean they are healthy itself.


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Vent thread Anonymous 112803[Reply]

Previous thread 109995

Anonymous 112804

images.jpeg

thinking about how ugly I used to be

Anonymous 112806

Thread pic sucks

Anonymous 112807

>>112806
real kek

Anonymous 112814

do you guys think people should start acting publicly cringe on purpose? i feel like it gatekeeps power hungry literalists and people who actually take stupid things people say as an excuse to behave badly.

Anonymous 112836

IMG_9583.jpeg

random thoughts at 2 AM
i ordered more late night sweets. i am also mildly drunk
fellow miners, is it just me or does everything on the internet feel soulless these days? here's an example-you can't say the word suicide in youtube videos, and the people who create media content will avoid saying the word "suicide" out of fear of getting demonetized, or similar capitalistic repercussions.
isn't that kind of dystopian? you can't say the word "suicide," because you might not be able to make more money than you already have. and it makes me wonder, how many topics do we avoid in society because it is "soft-censored" by corporate and political entities, as opposed to outright banned?
i sometimes think people should just make an internet 2.0, except instead of everything being mass surveilled by the FBI and carefully constructed by capitalistic motivations, people just fill the new internet with passion projects and unmonetized media. who the fuck, CARES, whether or not google or whatever SEO trend likes what you have to say? why is everything these days, so fucking, soulless.


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How the fuck do you get over burnout. Anonymous 112833[Reply]

In my sophomore year of college, I would sit at my desk for more than 12 hours a day doing school work. I would get 4-6 hours of sleep and did not have any hobbies or friends. I would also pull at least 1-2 all-nighters every week. As a result, I produced a lot of great work and was directly competing with my peers.

Now that I'm a junior, I can't give a flying fucckkkk about school. I can barely sit in my chair for more than a couple hours and I regularly get eight hours of sleep. All I do in class is day dream about my girlfriend. I work out for several hours a day, spend a lot of my time going outside, and hanging out with friends or my girlfriend. My grades are now shit and I've produced some of the worst shit imaginable for my classes. I couldn't even bother to go hunting for an internship this year.
My friends admire me because they still think that I have the same work ethic that I did last year. But I don't.
I am so ashamed for wasting my time to do all these stupid things like sleeping and working out. But at the same time, I can't bring myself to do homework all fucking day. I just can't. I can't even pull all-nighters anymore.

I am so burnt out. I miss the old me. I want to bring them back, but I don't want to sacrifice the relationships that I have now.

How do I get over this burnout? How do I start feeling the want to do school work for that fucking long again?

>tldr version: I used to do schoolwork nonstop last year but I can't bring myself to do it anymore. I wan't to go back to the person I was back then,but I don't wan't to lose the people I love.

Anonymous 112835

I used to be in a similar situation, I won't go into it because I vented about it in an old thread.
In fact, there it is if u want more context >>>/feels/98310
I was both burned out AND clinically depressed. In the end it resulted in me failing a semester of my school year. I'm surprised I failed only one exam, I didn't study at all.
Since the exam I failed was in the second semester I could stay at home until it then. I took almost 6 months off school, did nothing but take my depression meds and hide from my problems with life. Now I'm back to school, I'm taking only 4 classes out of 13 and the workload is very light so it's manageable but I am able to study again as you said for 8 hours non stop, I'm able to focus again. Still not motivated emotionally, but I am physically able to perform.
I wish there was a better cure, but everyone in my life simply told me to "relax"
I didn't even take additional classes in that 6 months period of "rest and relaxation". And ofc I got medicated for depression.


01CE60AA-C94C-4BCE…

moid hate thread Anonymous 85163[Reply]

doesn’t have to be about your boyfriend. I just hate fucking men at this point.

>everyone of them has failed me
>any moid I’ve dated either had a rape kink, or raped me
>porn/hentai addiction
>used me for my body
>always had an alternative motive
>manipulated me into insanity
>abused me if I didn’t do anything they wanted
>even my own dad has failed me

I have no fucking hope in this world.
433 posts and 53 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112825

9jpxig483xn51.jpg

>>112708
>he whips my favorite controller at my head and it almost hits me, explodes, and rains parts over my head
Reminds me of this moidchild. How did you end up with that psycho?

Anonymous 112827

>>112708
Girl go live in a women's shelter or find some female roommates. Try hitting up Craigslist or something

Anonymous 112829

>>112828
>Men have that you cuntoids dont ruin.
Such as? Women "ruining" something for men is usually just them participating in a space/activity while minding their own business. It's more often than not the men who can't control themselves at the sight of a female.

Anonymous 112831

>>112828
fuck off to /r9k/ faggot

Anonymous 112832

>>112831
i dont know why people assume r9k is this site's femcel counterpart. cc is just a small female imageboard. honestly we need to separate from the idea that this place is just "incels but women" cause that's just not true.


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telling my boyfriend i love him for the first time Anonymous 112824[Reply]

i think i am ready to tell my boyfriend i love him for the first time, any advice for doing it? i’m kind of nervous about it. i’ve only had one other boyfriend who said it to me first and i said it back out of nice-ness even though i hadn’t truly felt it yet. i also want to make sure it is special and meaningful for both of us. any advice appreciated!

Anonymous 112826

idk my bf said it first and I said it back and it was true. It happened when we were having a talk about serious emotional stuff. But every couple is different and I don't really think you can say it in a wrong way.


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