>>127103
thank you that’s exactly how i meant it.

Nice poem

>>127113
thanks!!!

>>127087
This level of attachment surpassing destiny and soulmates is what I crave, but I’m afraid this requires time. I wish I could feel this way for someone upon locking eyes for the first time, but that’s psychotic. How do you bring yourself to get close with someone to the point of reaching soulmate stage? The sheer effort required for the journey paralyses me every time I think about it. How do you brave the storm nonas?

>>127087
Why do you wanna be a whore lol it's degrading

I'm getting a bit sad as I realize there's a real need in social groups. I used to really hate the idea of subordinating myself to rules but I wonder if I must choose safety over agency.
There's strength in numbers that I lack - I am not as impervious to societal dislike as I thought once. Honestly I thought that it's disgusting to cover for one's weakness by seeking protection from the crowd but sometimes it's simply smart.
Maybe this anxiety will just pass on its own. I can't imagine maintaining group relations with a bunch of people I don't care about for that long. Maybe the choice is more than just safety or agency - maybe I can get more benefit out of groups. I don't know.

Working at a black company, the new hire is way too young (born in 05) and messes up at work. I think he has a good heart, but he is mega autistic and doesn’t understand where he messes up. He cries cus he thinks everyone is too harsh on him, he blames his bad back (he is the youngest and fittest) whenever someone asks why he’s just watching people carry stuff, and he still asks the most basic questions about his job 5 months in. He keeps trying to make unfunny jokes that borders on being rude and he has zero hobbies outside gaming. My coworkers had several serious talks with him but he always ends up crying and talking about financial troubles and having no friends. He treats the newer hire badly even though that guy’s awesome. He thinks the scolding he gets is a seniority power thing so he keeps trying to scold the other guy over minute things since he’s good at everything.

He is super attached to me since I don’t scold him. I’m too scared to scold him anyway (he’s built like a giant panda) and I always play mediator when he’s about to be punished cus moid tears (especially from a giant) kinda breaks my heart in the heat of the moment. But now I’ve been assigned to a different team and he has gotten much worse since I left. The higher ups refuse to do anything that will get attention from HR, so the managers are trying to dump him to each other. I’m close with my previous manager (his current manager) so she asks me to babysit him. She managed to convince my new manager to let me hop between teams to take ‘babysitter duty’ which means my workload is lessened but I’m called up whenever he fucks up (at least twice a week). I’m so done playing therapist to this guy but I think he might kill himself if I’m not constantly there to listen to him vent. How the hell do I get out of this without feeling like I’m killing him?

>>127117
>black company
By that do you mean a secret, illegal company or simply a company operated by nignogs?

>>127118
typical asian black company
i.e. Overworked, understaffed, pointless tasks, profit first, pressure tactics to silence employees .etc

>>127119
I see.
Don't validate someone who is indulging in self pity. It's not helpful in long term. Tell him to read Dhammapada. If he kills himself that's his business, better luck next life.

>>72555
Sounds like you have an attraction to the GAME of love itself, but can't commit. You like the chase, but you love it too much, and it leaves you wanting when feelings become mutual, since you haven't become content with loving what being in a relationship is actually like.

Hope you're doing better now nona, been a while.

I walked past six baby skunks eating a trash pizza

i fully believe in the concept of toxic camaraderie. the concept of friendships can be toxic, in spite of how media portrays friendship as always being pure or wholesome. for example, people who assume that you do not like them or are against them as people solely for the fact of not desiring to be their friend. in actuality, most people just want to have friends that they believe align with their goals and interests. being selective about who you are friends with, or not desiring to be friends with someone, does not indicate that you are against that person or dislike them AT ALL. it just means you do not perceive someone as adding to your life - that is not dislike or hatred, or that you are against them as people. people are groomed by society into believing that someone that does not want to be friends with them threaten their security. i can think of examples in real life where someone assumed that my desire not to be their friend was based on malicious feelings towards them, where none but neutrality existed. you do not have to want to be friends with EVERYONE - that is a waste of emotional energy and humans are limited by their lifespan and how they dedicate their time.
additionally, being friends with someone can result in malicious behavior, even if you BELIEVE that the friendship itself is pure. just because you are friends with someone does not mean you will hate someone just because your friend does. people who are friends and think of their friendship as a means of hating people together, that is absolutely dumb. friendship should be about supporting your friend, not about hating people together, even IF you care about your friend or perceive them as being hurt by someone and believe that hatred is justified, when it never is - media's portrayal of such friendships is an example of propagating and normalizing toxic camaraderie.

I tried participating in an event in Pokémon go, but the bosses was too hard for me. And the group chat im in just Said "get gud." Meanwhile they all have people they can play with irl. I don't. It just sucks that they're not there for me in game when im always there for them. Im going to try my luck again in the Big city tomorrow. Hopefully there will be enough people playing irl tomorrow.

Had to socialize with fellow university students and the intellectual gap made me want to die.

>>127067
i agree i think it can be good to not be obsessed with people viewing you a certain way or needing to prove yourself

>>127067
I know I’m not dumb, but it’s just fun to be dumb? people say I’m clumsy and just gloss over anything intellectual with me which should feel demeaning but it doesn’t? but anyways this all stemmed from the horror of being normiefied! I was expecting the standard “don’t become a braindead normie” responses to op but nonas seem to generally agree it’s ok to normiemax?

>>127069
I generally believe you should be able to act like a normie when the situation calls for it. If you aren't truly a normie you won't turn into one by accident.

>>126975
>normiemaxx
Easy, mask your autism and fake it 'til you make it. Or just fake it.
Let out a bit of autism every now and then to test the waters.
Find yourself at least one person you don't need to act like a normie with, so you don't get too exhausted. Try to find more than one person like that if you can.
Observe others and if you engage in conversation, don't be afraid of messing up, social skills will build on not just prior research but also on trial and error. It's all a matter of practise, you'll get better the more you do it.
Try to balance the benefits of hiding your weirdness with the drawbacks of overanalysing social interactions.
Once you can mask without having to overthink to a pathological degree, work on the negative side effects the masking had on you, or work on those alongside the masking from the start.
Most strangers don't actually care that much if you act like a weirdo though, unless they're middle schoolers or you're trying to be close friends (try not to come on too strong, always consider time and place when meeting new people).
If you want friends, maybe focus more on taking an interest in them and their interests and praise them to show that you like them (it has to be at least somewhat honest though). Voice your most normie-adjacent opinions first (try to be more subtle about the non-normie stuff and gauge their response to it before really delving into it) and show off your good parts rather than trying to only appear like a perfectly normal, blank slate.
>But I'm not autisic
You don't need an autism diagnosis to mask your quirks, even if they're extreme ones and if you want to look up normiemaxxing techniques, the autism keyword can spit out some nice resources.
I'm not autistic either but I grew up in an abusive household, so I can relate to some of the masking stuff in a fawning-response kind of way.

>Friends
The more closely you've bonded with someone, the more accepting they'll be of abnormal behaviour (in stages, don't reveal the abnormal stuff all at once).
You just need to reel them in first.

it's kinda true but mostly for a specific subset of humans some would call turbonormies

it’s all just brain chemicals. you experience a lot of them at first when you like someone. you get them intensely during sex if you haven’t had it for a while. then it wears off. that’s the honeymoon period. men get bored especially. i wouldn’t say it’s turbo normies at all. i think gross nerds tend to be too unstable to stay together and constantly think they could do better because of movies. hot people tie down another hot person but fuck around a lot. nerds change partners but some will have relationships with very little sex. two gross people fucking can’t even turn on the gross people. there are examples of this all over the internet. it’s always a fantasy they want. also when you get someone fat or a woman taller than a man or someone with acne or frizzy hair or bad teeth or downward facing breasts. it’s just hard to maintain the fantasy they first stepped into once they really start looking at their partner. they can look at porn that’s much better and if you’re out of shape or gross it’s better to jerk off to them and go back to gaming. it takes special people who aren’t just slaves to brain chemicals and have more going on inside. and it takes two people who can’t keep their hands off each other who physically fit together in a sexy way.

>>126931
maybe you're autistic or something because that doesn't sound like very unreasonable to tell about (1 life event that explains visible life debilitating change) especially if op asked him or if they "hit it off" hard enough

>>126935
im an evil hag spirit

>>126830
I'm not sure cute outweights crippled + porn addict this doesn't sound like a good deal
I knew a guy who suffered nerve damage from a failed an hero attempt and the constant chronic pain makes it extremely hard to function and not to abuse painkillers/porn to deal with it

>>126931
I'd like your thoughts on this but I've come to believe inceldom is a cope that only losers use to explain being social rejects without having to face their own inner ugliness - this mix of indulgent laziness and entitlement to muh waifu that results in the bitter inceldom we know, in my experience moids who come to terms with their unattractiveness or take some accountability are less likely to fall into it

>>127081
i know ugly guys absolutely drowning in pussy because they have charisma. incels nerf themselves. also the difference between an ugly guy and a cute one is often just a tan and fifteen pounds of muscle. there’s something to be said for any guy with cow eyes brown curls who is medium ugly honestly. i kind of like their quirked up features sometimes. i find the male celebrities pushed at us as sex symbols too sterile. give me a joe keery type that’s sincere with a head of great hair and developed an actual personality over that for sure. also a lot of traits in men incels like are scary looking and would make me have an ugly daughter.

>>126858
It's ok to be by yourself

>>127088
it wouldn’t be l’amour it would be mon amour. bebe is more like literally a baby. you would say mon bebe at most but i’m pretty sure the word you had on the tip of your tongue was cheri. like you aren’t passing as people who even know basic french. which he doesn’t really. but it’s very interesting that you’re changing VPNs and writing back and forth as him and yourself leaving alleged love notes. where you both sound like the same person and use the same phrases. i’m telling you right now rhiannon; not a single soul on earth believes on the day he got engaged he was writing to you on the unsent project. no one believes that someone else is trying to make you look bad or frame you. you are quite literally impersonating a married man and trying to fake a fucking affair. you wrote J you had been sleeping with him every month they’d been together. this is actually so fucked up and no real friend of his would act like this. i have never in my life met anyone as messed up as you with so little of an excuse. you had an amicable breakup and he even tried to be your friend for years while you sexually harassed him. he had to lie to you so you wouldn’t turn on him because everyone is scared of you. you’re obsessive and violent and now your new limerence stage where you are trying to fake the most feeble evidence of an affair i’ve ever seen. do you actually think he would be texting anyone in a place his wife could see? he has your number dude. he would just text these things then delete them. no one is posting evidence of an affair and J doesn’t have a brain of actual oatmeal to fall for it either.

>>127088
i think the thing that bothers me most honestly is the lack of creativity. come on. coeur. miel. bijou. these are literally the most basic french terms of endearment. i’m not even fluent and my pronunciation brings shame to my entire family. like there’s not much sanctity of that relationship to defend and i’m only doing it because i feel bad for J. no wonder she’s trapped in this us against the world thing. but god can you at least write well? you’re a thirty something year old woman and the kids taking french in 7th grade wrote better love notes to each other than this. he’s no author himself but i wouldn’t have dated him if that was the best he could do at twenty i wouldn’t have given him another glance. and you’re trying to make it look like he writes like that at 30? you’re his worst enemy dude.

also i’m in a mood today so just saying him thinking i’m cool and trying to imitate me isn’t flattering. you don’t tell a girl something bad happened to her because she trusted a stranger and then stalk her online and start trying to copy her aesthetic. what exactly would he be the avenging angel of and what exactly would god have to say to a man who defends rape? i get the rosalia religious psychosis song is trending and people are about to start jumping on my crazy girl shit too but it’s disturbing before it became trendy he was doing it to the particular girl i am to him. skinwalking being an angry victim is so fucking crazy to me. you will never fucking be worthy of spiritual insights straight from the source you have not put in the blood and isolation and devotion!!!

>>127046
>the memories are yours forever

That's not what alzheimer's and dementia said

>>127048
Well then you’re just screwed and should find a way to euthanise yourself before you hurt your loved ones

you can’t take loved away.

People stay when they're getting something from you. Doesn't mean you're a bad person if nobody stays with you, just that you need to learn skills ppl need. It's like a job.

>>127064
this is so true it breaks my heart. and men only ever want one thing. i wish i’d never found out how quickly i would be discarded when i couldn’t provide sex temporarily

i know I will get hate for that, but femininity and masculinity is biological, it's not a social construct. Gender is biological. That's why I reject my biology. I hate my biological femininity and what it entails for us in sex.

I don't feel oppressed by men. I feel oppressed by my biology. Especially in sex.

>>126757
>I don't feel oppressed by men. I feel oppressed by my biology. Especially in sex.

Explain?

OP it sounds to me like you're taking what you see in p*rn for reality. I guarantee you it's not.

>>126663
This

>>126666
No they're fucking not. It is a skewed, reductive view of feminity.
You're so wrong that Satan himself blessed you with demonitc digits lmao

>>127072
i agree. you have to watch porn to have these thoughts. stop watching that shit