How are some of you girls still virgins? Anonymous 24970
Before you reply, im also a virgin I just want to know why is it always mentioned how girls have no trouble losing their virginity.
I have no idea how "normal" girls do it, do they just get drunk and let someone fuck them?
Is sex worth it?
I remain a virgin for religious reasons. But if I didn't have those convictions I'd probably just have said yes at some point when a guy's asked me out.
>>24970>I remain a virgin for religious reasons
Cool>I'd probably just have said yes at some point when a guy's asked me out
So just a "lets fuck grl"?
Have guys really said that to you?
Usually you talk for a while after meeting, hang out, they might feel you up or try to kiss, then try to take things further.
I haven't gone farther than a bit of oral, not only for religious reasons but also because I want I guess my time with whoever I marry to be really special.
Maybe its a bit overoptimistic but whatever
Were you at a party or alone at his house?
How did you feel after oral? I think I would be ashamed of myself and feel bad for my first bf
Sex is for me something very special, so I ceep my virinity for the one person I will spent my life with.
Never was on a date because never meta person who I thought a good partner.
I need to know a person better bevor I would consider them a potentionel partner. So a long friendship bevor a date. But today many people don't value that anymore. So I am still a virgin.
Also the relationship is more important than sex.
I did it for my first bf at his house.
It was a really dumb decision because I did it out of desperation.
Our relationship was close to ending and I felt my desire to wait was a big factor, tried to give him at least something to change his mind, ended up leaving me for a single mom eventually :'^)
I felt awful after the first time. I didn't let him know, but I cried for a bit. Few times after that were ok, jaw hurt pretty bad though, cant open enough to keep my teeth off so I guess I'm shit at it
>>24990>mfw hate giving blowjobs but apparently am extremely good at it
if i think about what i'm doing then i end up gagging so i literally just close my eyes and imagine being somewhere else exploring fucking avalon or some shit
that's the best tip i got
I don't think I'll ever be comfortable enough in front of a man to lose it.
I want to do it in a serious relationship but no one will date me due to my poor social skills. I make efforts but I'm just a shitty weirdo and men don't like that.
It's frustrating because I do have a high drive, but I just know that I'd regret having sex with some stranger. Plus I've never been to a proper party or club in my life.
And on top of all this, I'm a domme so losing it in the way I'd want is going to be almost impossible. I couldn't be a sub to save my life.
There are a lot of reasons I guess. But it's mostly my personality.
can i ask what sort of behavior you think makes you a 'shitty weirdo'?
a lot of the times when you do engage with men they just want you to ask them questions about themselves and listen, and that's considered a good conversation to them. that doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be submissive–it can be very intimidating to be the quiet, confident type, it makes men feel like they're being judged and have to impress you. plus being the one to ask questions means you're the one responsible for directing the flow of the conversation, not them.
I thought I'd never do it because I am shy and socially awkward but it finally happened when I was twenty five with my first boyfriend who also happened to be socially awkward and a virgin. We're very happy together. Don't worry too much now, depending on your age there's still a lot of time.
That's what I do, and it's actually in my nature to be a listener. The problem arises when they ask questions back and I fumble and it comes out that I dislike humanity and don't drink or party.
Men don't like that. But it's the truth.
where are you meeting these men and what's the general age range? because i've found that as they get older they generally veer away from the 'drinking and partying' or wanting a partner who does so.
I'm 21 so go after guys from 18-22, at university or at work.
And see, the thing is I want to date someone who has never done those things. A proper introvert from birth.
But men are incapable of introversion, from what I can tell. Those that are "introverts" are actually just social failures who want
to be extroverts deep down. That's why bots cry so much about Chad getting Stacy, they WANT
to be Chad partying with Stacy.
Most males are just not able to spend quiet time alone. I only know one in my real life who fits this bill and he's my stepfather. That's pretty pathetic, men. One out of all that I've known of in my 21 years.
Anyway, my point still stands that my personality is the problem. If everyone else you run into is "wrong," chances are that's not the case and it is you that is wrong. But I also don't want to change. Quite the predicament, right?
tbh i just think you need to be going after older guys who are already settled down and have their shit together. 22-year-olds are not those guys.
maybe also throw out the idea of >And see, the thing is I want to date someone who has never done those things. A proper introvert from birth.
because those people are extremely rare, and even if you can find one, they're socially stunted to the point that they are unlikely to be good partner material. it's not bad for someone to have some life experience. i think it probably just means they know what they want out of a partner and you won't have to worry later about them cheating on you or having a midlife crisis because they feel like they 'missed out' on having fun as a younger person.
but if that's really what you want, i suggest online dating, because the chances of finding a 'proper introvert' out at a bar or a party are exceedingly slim. just be very clear about what you're looking for and what your personality is like in your profile.
>>25060>chances of finding an introvert at a bar or party is extremely slim
Like I said I don't go to those lmao. I meet men at school, which should be an equal ground for introverts and extroverts.
And I do believe this to be a male issue since I know plenty of introverted and healthy women.>they're socially stunted
So am I, so it's no problem. That's kind of the point actually.
And a true introverted person would know for sure what they want since we spend so much time thinking of ourselves and the future. The people who have mid-life crises are just repressed extroverts, the kind I mentioned earlier.
I also don't want to date much older men. All of their past degeneracy aside, the power imbalance would be uncomfortable for me. I couldn't handle it, I want to be the breadwinner in the future amongst other issues (like finding men in my age range cuter and wanting to age together).
I'm grateful for your kindness to me here btw, I probably came off as argumentative but I appreciate your attempts at helping me. I will probably turn to online dating at some point.
>Before you reply, im also a virgin I just want to know why is it always mentioned how girls have no trouble losing their virginity.
If you have absolutely no standards and don't care if you have a horrible experience you can probs get laid ez. But I would really not recommend that, it'll just make you feel weird>I have no idea how "normal" girls do it, do they just get drunk and let someone fuck them?
Failed normie here:
The process I used is, befriend, flirt, ask them if they would be keen. If yes continue to build tension. If no… well you got rejected, happens to everyone>Is sex worth it?
Only if it's with someone you care about and can communicate needs with
>I have no idea how "normal" girls do it, do they just get drunk and let someone fuck them?
I was in a long-term relationship with my boyfriend. I actually wanted to have sex for a while, but he felt like he wasn't ready. We ended up having it on the roof of his apartment a year and 3 months after we had officially gotten together.
We stayed together for another 2 or a little less years. We broke up because either I don't experience attraction to men or I just don't experience attraction to people. He was my only friend during high school. I did love him, but certainly not in a romantic way. I was not sexually attracted to him either, even though a lot of people thought he was handsome.
laughed really hard at this mental image but I think this sounds right, I'll try it eventually, thanks for the advice
If you don't mind my asking, if you have no sexual experience then how do you know you're a domme? I've found that most of the things I fantasized about before losing my virginity were much better in my mind, and many things that I had never considered or would have even found repulsive have turned into my greatest joys. Which isn't to say you're "really" a sub or anything, I'm not trying to contradict. Just pointing out that it's unusual to develop a strong sexual identity without experience (or any kind of identity in the absence of experience).
Years of masturbation/drawing my own porn/definite enjoyment out of lifting my smaller male school friends in my arms and defeating them in arm wrestling.
There's just no doubt in my mind I'd enjoy tossing a little guy around. Maybe
I wouldn't be as into hardcore violence in practice as I am now, but I'm into GFD at least. I could see myself possibly falling in love and being unable to go beyond spanking because I want to protect and treasure him, for instance. But I'm definitely not a sub.
Does having oral sex count as losing your virginity?
I think it does, at least to me.
>>25057>>25038> If everyone else you run into is "wrong," chances are that's not the case and it is you that is wrong. But I also don't want to change. Quite the predicament, right?
Naw there are guys just like you, and into the stuff as you even at your age too. Don't change you'll just end up unsatisfied.
The normal ideal way is to just be in a loving relationship where it's consensual and caring.
Constantly. I mean usually they ask you somewhere and aren’t that obvious with it but after a while you learn that’s essentially what they mean when they say “hang out” “watch a movie” etc.
What's your secret? WHR of 0.6 or less? Oval face with upward canthal tilted almond eyes, full lips, and a small nose? Larger than average breasts? Well-proportioned leg-to-torso ratio? Small ribcage and shoulders? Being between 5' and 5'5"? Is it presentation (fashion and professional-tier makeup)? Are you white or Asian?
How is being hit on such a phenomenon? Holy fuck I'm gonna kys myself
>at least to me
My friend is such a slut. She does everything but is still "virgin" because she never initiated and always used protection when she consented, and never cheated. The times she was raped don't count cause the guy was always not her bf and never infected her with a disease or baby.
My other friend kissed her bf once and now thinks she's a dirty whore and that no man will ever marry her. besides the shame she must be feeling, and the anguish she'll feel when he breaks up with her, I envy her deep focus on her schoolwork and creative projects that she has had since shortly (<month) after the kiss, and her not obsessively worrying whether he'll leave her.
I've done it, i like it, but i wish i didn't. if i didn't like it i would have so much more time doing the things that bring me durable enjoyment. the only things better than it can never reach the intensity of pleasure of the exact moment of climax.
I'm a virgin too, in my 20's. I used to be really socially anxious (it's a lot better now but I have 0 social skills) so never made friends, much less got into a relationhip. I never get approached but it's not common in my country and I'm average with a resting bitch face so that doesn't help either. I don't wanna get on tinder and the like because I'd just feel used. At this rate I'll die a virgin lmao
I don't like my body and I hold strong prejudices againts anyone I barely meet or just even see. I expect anyone to have prejudices against me as well that I fear will be confirmated once they get closer. I'm grumpy and ugly basically. On top of that I want to be with someone in a serious relationship, so I wouldn't get rid of my virgin status in a dark alley with a dude I just met.
Any news from the anons that posted before? Have any of you found what you were looking for?
I want a man who:
Praises me constantly, and means it, and praises me over matters that are important and not useless shit
Puts me first, considers me more than important than him
Doesn't interfere with my liberty and my finances
Such a man doesn't exist, so I'm never going to be with anyone. Simple as that.
you sound like an insufferable cunt
i'm a virgin because lesbian sex doesn(t count you see ;)
Soon to be 30 years old virgin.
I find naked bodys repulsive, mine or someones else doesn't matter.
I am heterosexual but never found a man who I felt attracted to. Plus no real sex drive.
I have read some stuff about sex, as I read how everyone wrote about it, I lost all interest on losing it and prefer to stay a virgin until I die. Seriously that stuff is just depressing. Also how some people talk about their partners or partners body makes me so insecure and scared that I am hopefully going to stay a relationship virgin too.
>>57400>how some people talk about their partners or partners body makes me so insecure and scared
How? Is it the good things they say or is it the bad things?
>>57400>I have read some stuff about sex, as I read how everyone wrote about it, I lost all interest on losing it and prefer to stay a virgin until I die. Seriously that stuff is just depressing. Also how some people talk about their partners or partners body makes me so insecure and scared that I am hopefully going to stay a relationship virgin too.
This feel is too relatable.
The worst thing is, some people choose to be together with someone they don't find attractive but complain about their inadequate physical traits as if their partners were at fault for being unattractive. I've seen so much stuff about women being criticized by their boyfriends for having the "wrong boob size", not being the "right colouring" or differing from their boyfriends' ideal type in other ways. Then why did those men choose to be together with them at all? What did they expect? Things like hair colour can be easily changed, sure, but things like breast implants are more complicated. A lot of people wouldn't do unnecessary plastic surgery, especially not if they're personally happy with what they have.
think it's bad to be picky and have preferences and high standards, which seems to be an unpopular opinion. What sucks is expecting your partner who does not fit said preferences to change themself or making them feel bad for not looking "perfect" in your eyes.
If I ever had sex with a guy and he made a negative comment about my appearance, I'd probably die on the spot out of embarrassment. It's better to never put myself in such a situation at all.
The bad things. It is like they only are together because being alone is something horrible.
"I love my Husband, but he is fairly unattractive." "My girlfriend is very sweet but dump as a rock." "Better than being alone." "I wish they would be/had etc." "The vagina of my girlfriend looks so gross." "My boyfriend is so egoistical."
Stuff like that. It is a constant nagging and call me naive, but should the person you love not be at least satisfying? I mean not sexual, but it often sounds so cruel, like "Yeah he/she is not what I wanted, but I got her." If that makes sense…>>57462
Amen to that.
Being picky isn't something bad. I don't get it ether, if they not attracted to them why are they together? It isn't something bad to be not attracted to someones, but for the love of good, stop nagging on it if you choose that person!
In general I often have the feeling than people choose a relationship because it happens or they did not want to be alone or feel horny.
I don't know. Have not seen one relationship that sounded like it is worth it.
>>57462>Then why did those men choose to be together with them at all? What did they expect?
Well hold on, are they expressing disgust at those traits or just being honest with what they actually like? Because I can see the logic behind it if it's not disgust. You can decide to be with someone because they're the best holistic fit that's realistic for you, but that doesn't mean you think they look perfect. Italian sports models look better than my bf, and I'll point that out to him, but that doesn't mean I'm not happy with him.
You sound like a good person anon. I think you deserve someone. Really a lot of it sounds like it has to do with the ego and entitlement that people feel today. Everyone's more obsessed than ever with making sure they're getting a bargain, in terms of their mate. It's awful, but there's not much to do except revolt against it. Good people like you exist in this world, and it would be better if you found each other than live fearful and alone. It's a possibility anon.
Disgust, disapproval or dissatisfaction. The difference between you and them is, you probably don't pressure your boyfriend to try to look like a model and make him feel bad about not living up to your ideal type. You still appreciate him for who he is and don't think he's just some 2nd choice you settled for because you couldn't get any better.
Casual sex is gross. Would rather die a virgin than have it. Everyone has too much sex, it's rotting your brains.
I find myself too physically repulsive to find someone to lose it with. And i can only orgasm in a very specific way so it probably wouldn't be fun.
If all you're looking to do is get fat P in your virgin V the answer's pretty much the same for both men and women, go get a hooker. Sure, male hookers are less numerous, but that just means you can save money and lose even more self-esteem by sidling up with whoever has a reputation for being a manwhore.
If you're looking for a meaningful relationship which won't make you want to kill yourself after the high subsides then that's probably the question you actually want, since in my experience once you have a guy then unless they're an ultra beta grasseater they'll grab you by the waist eventually.>>25057
Well, you're not going to run into true introverts, because they're introverts. The whole point
is that they avoid people and/or don't like to start or necessarily participate in conversation. Like, where are you going to look for them? They're not at the party, they eat on their own and probably barely acknowledge you if you sit across from them, they won't be at the bar and they won't try to strike up conversation in the library or at campus. You'd have to be the one engaging then, and you're saying you don't like engaging. Super late answer but I found it surprising nobody said anything to this effect.
It's okay, anon-chan, I'm still here.
Since then I've been the instigator a whole lot, and though I fucked up a lot the experiences also helped me realize things about myself and develop as a human being. Though I'm still fundamentally introverted and continue to avoid parties and bars, interacting with others and taking the time to truly understand them is helpful in speeding up personal growth and truly understanding yourself as well.
So though it's late, the advice is good nonetheless and I back it up as a recommendation.
I am sorry that is a stupid question, did you only got together with your boyfriend because he was the best deal?
Do you love him? I mean, I maybe naive about this type but I am not totally stupid and know you can't survive of love alone, but it sounds like you only date him because of a list you made.
Not that I want to say to have a list is bad, but it sounds so cold.
If I accept a person as my partner, don't I will accept his mistakes too? I mean if someone has a unhealthy habit and you want to change that, that is more than okay.
But why would you tell your boyfriend that he isn't as pretty as person x, wouldn't that hurt him?
I don't know.
That is exactly what I am fearing. Just be choose because it was at the moment the best. But actually not be satisfied with it and secretly wishing I was a little bit more like x.>>57641
I know I will sound super edgy but I have to quote here Owlman from Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths.
No. Not good. Never good. After all, I'm only human.
Because of humanity (yes myself included) I prefer being alone over the possibility to get hurt or hurt someone.
This is one of the most scariest things for me that I would found someone and in around 4 years i realize that I don't love them anymore. That I have to tell them and see their world crumble. I could never do that and I don't think I could handle that happening to me.And as idiotic as it sounds 30 is way to old in my books to start dating. Most people in my age had already a relationship. I always read that people don't want to start from 0 again and I understand that.
There's someone like you saying the exact same thing. The two of you need to find each other, so that you don't spend your final years in misery. Don't give up anon.
NTA, but, speaking as someone who is married to someone who is not perfect.>Do you love him?
Yes.>I mean, I maybe naive about this type but I am not totally stupid and know you can't survive of love alone, but it sounds like you mean, I maybe naive about this type but I am not totally stupid and know you can't survive of love alone, but it sounds like you only date him because of a list you made. only date him because of a list you made.
I wouldn't say a formalized "list" existed, but certain traits were needed for the relationship to fulfill it's function. To be honest, looks are probably one of the least important things to get fixated on.>Not that I want to say to have a list is bad, but it sounds so cold.
It is cold, however, if all you're chasing is the fiery heat of passion. Sure, you may fuck Chad because he makes you tingle inside, but that feeling dies out quickly. Love can be cultivated as much as it is spontaneous.>If I accept a person as my partner, don't I will accept his mistakes too?
Correct, so make sure you find someone whose mistakes are something you can put up with.>But why would you tell your boyfriend that he isn't as pretty as person x, wouldn't that hurt him?
Maybe, but if he's self-confident he either can acknowledge that other men can be more attractive than him and not give a fuck, or, he has the gusto to correct his image in the ways he can (working out, grooming). If it does hurt him, probably means he has a self-image issue turning complex, which probably isn't a healthy person to be with. It sounds like you're projecting a lot of your own body perception issues onto other people.>That is exactly what I am fearing. Just be choose because it was at the moment the best.
You are under the false impression that love is a momentary event and not a continual experience. You can either spend your time trying to luck out finding the perfect person god put on this earth specifically for you. Or, you can find a guy you can cultivate love with together.
>But actually not be satisfied with it and secretly wishing I was a little bit more like x.
You're already doing this, and will do this anyway, you're doing it right now.
>I know I will sound super edgy but I have to quote here Owlman from Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths
No you don't sound edgy, you sound vapid instead. What you quote is just a very dramatic way of re-framing the hedgehog dilemma.
>And as idiotic as it sounds 30 is way to old in my books to start dating.
Then in your book, it's too late to start dating, and you will suffer in a cage of your creation. Question why you believe it's not worth it.
>Most people in my age had already a relationship.
You aren't most people, don't compare yourself to some nebulous mental construct you've made of "most people". You're you, face your issues as you want to face your issues.
>I always read that people don't want to start from 0 again and I understand that.
How can you start from 0 again
if you never left it in the first place?>>57962>Well, you're not going to run into true introverts, because they're introverts. The whole point is that they avoid people and/or don't like to start or necessarily participate in conversation. Like, where are you going to look for them? They're not at the party, they eat on their own and probably barely acknowledge you if you sit across from them, they won't be at the bar and they won't try to strike up conversation in the library or at campus. You'd have to be the one engaging then, and you're saying you don't like engaging. Super late answer but I found it surprising nobody said anything to this effect.
A "true" introvert would be a schizoid. In that case you're right, however, most people who are looking for an introvert don't want a schizoid, they want someone who isn't a social butterfly needing attention 24/7. These people do exist, however, you are right that they aren't at parties or social gatherings. Introverts will be found in places like work or classes, where they get their dopamine hits spending time on things that are important to them, namely not people. However, if you're a person that an introvert can talk to about the things that gives them dopamine hits for talking about, guess what? He'll enjoy talking to you to. Just make sure you like the things an introverts like, you're going to be hearing a lot about them.
>>57978>I am sorry that is a stupid question, did you only got together with your boyfriend because he was the best deal?
Yes, because obviously if I could be with a man who was exactly like my boyfriend except hotter and who is a better singer then I'd date them instead. Unless you're one of those rare girls who legitimately got the best of everything they could ever want, I think this is just bowing to reality. No matter who you end up with, you're settling for him, because at some point the dream of being a fairy tale princess who gets the single perfect
man has to die.
>Do you love him? I mean, I maybe naive about this type but I am not totally stupid and know you can't survive of love alone, but it sounds like you only date him because of a list you made.
Don't see how that works. Sure, I love him. I don't literally have a list of ten boys above him, I'm just saying that there are qualities I like that he lacks, but that's alright because the rest of him makes up for those annoying bits. I'm under the impression that's sort of what a healthy relationship looks like. Someone who unironically can't see any problems or places for improvement in their bf is just slavish.
>Not that I want to say to have a list is bad, but it sounds so cold. If I accept a person as my partner, don't I will accept his mistakes too? I mean if someone has a unhealthy habit and you want to change that, that is more than okay.
Well yeah, you accept their problems. That doesn't mean you pretend they don't exist. I feel almost like pretending the problem doesn't exist is the opposite of accepting it, it's just being in denial. Though I'm not sure if we're talking about the same sort of attitude at this point?
>But why would you tell your boyfriend that he isn't as pretty as person x, wouldn't that hurt him?
Because I know it doesn't hurt him and we laugh about it together. At the end of the day my mouth is around his cock and not the italian sports model on his magazine cover. I suppose it would hurt more if he wasn't confident that I'm not a cheating slut.
>That is exactly what I am fearing. Just be choose because it was at the moment the best. But actually not be satisfied with it and secretly wishing I was a little bit more like x.
Well, if your bf is saying that and it bothers you a lot you could tell him about it. I don't mean that I say it hurtfully, it's just truthful and we're both confident enough that it's not an issue. You obviously don't say it while being intimate, I'd kill him myself if he told me my hair was ugly while we were at it.
It could honestly be that we're talking about two different things? I feel like you're talking about a man being actually actively spiteful about it while I'm just being honest and joking about it.
You understood me wrong, but I probably explained it not good.
No one is perfect, to search for it would be endless.
>It is cold, however, if all you're chasing is the fiery heat of passion. Sure, you may fuck Chad because he makes you tingle inside, but that feeling dies out quickly. Love can be cultivated as much as it is spontaneous.
I would never choose a partner for only the heat at the moment, or spontaneous.
A relationship has to grow. At the best from friendship to love. Because you have to know a Person bevor.
It only sounded for me more like: "I am in this time of live where I need a partner. I don't really like you and I think you are not pretty, but you are the best I have right now so we will be together."
Shouldn't it be more like:
"Hey I know you for many years, we get along really well and I like to be around you. Would you like to spent the rest of our lives together?"
Does that make more sence?
I know that a relationship is not always sun and rainbows, but should it be one of the pleasant things in life?
>Maybe, but if he's self-confident he either can acknowledge that other men can be more attractive than him and not give a fuck, or, he has the gusto to correct his image in the ways he can (working out, grooming). If it does hurt him, probably means he has a self-image issue turning complex, which probably isn't a healthy person to be with. It sounds like you're projecting a lot of your own body perception issues onto other people.
I said bevor if it is because of health issues like gaining weight or if the shirt doesn't suit them. It isn't bad. It is acutally good.
But to say:"Yeah he is so much better looking than you." Just for saying it. Makes no sense to me.
Why would you do that?
>You are under the false impression that love is a momentary event and not a continual experience. You can either spend your time trying to luck out finding the perfect person god put on this earth specifically for you. Or, you can find a guy you can cultivate love with together.
That is true, love is for me just a feeling that occurs for some time. For some people it takes only half a year to vanish for others it takes 30 years.
That at least is what I saw by other people. Everything is nice and happy, but as soon as the love feelings goes people can't stand each other anymore because they did not choose their partner carefully enough.
Some don't want to be alone so they stay together and are miserable. Or complain constant about their partner.
That is not what I want. I am not searching for the best. I am not searching at all. Because I know live is not a fairytale. To go and get together with seomeone, just because they are here and have the chance that I end up hating that person, is not what I want.
Theb yes I prefer to stay alone.
>You're already doing this, and will do this anyway, you're doing it right now.
Sorry I do not really understand what you want to tell me with that.
>No you don't sound edgy, you sound vapid instead. What you quote is just a very dramatic way of re-framing the hedgehog dilemma.
I did not know about the hedgehog dilemma, had to read it up.
It was not what I wanted to say.
That ano >>57641
sayed:>You sound like a good person anon.
And I use the quote to say that no human is really good because we are human.
>Then in your book, it's too late to start dating, and you will suffer in a cage of your creation. Question why you believe it's not worth it.
You assume I am unhappy with my current state, which I am not. I am in no cage or restricted.
>You aren't most people, don't compare yourself to some nebulous mental construct you've made of "most people". You're you, face your issues as you want to face your issues.
We always compare people and we get compared with other people. Why would you then say to your partner that they has to lose weight, or that they doesn't look like that person.
Everything gets compared, mental or physical health, how we act around others, how we dress etc. I don't think we can't stop that really.
And sometimes it is necessary for example health.
>How can you start from 0 again if you never left it in the first place?
What I wanted to say is that other people don't want a partner who doesn't know how to act in a relationship. That they don't want to waste time on explaining things or keep waitng because someone new to that needs more time.
I hope I could clear some misunderstanding.
Yeah I think we do. Joking is not bad at all. I really though that it was meant serious.
I never had a relationship, so no I don't have a perfect boyfriend.
I agree with you at many thinks. I only can't let go of the dream. But that is okay. I am not unhapoy or lonely.
>>58021>It only sounded for me more like: "I am in this time of live where I need a partner. I don't really like you and I think you are not pretty, but you are the best I have right now so we will be together."
Why does anyone "need" a partner? I don't understand what perception you're trying to convey.>Shouldn't it be more like:
"Hey I know you for many years, we get along really well and I like to be around you. Would you like to spent the rest of our lives together?"
Why should it? Past behavior can have little predictive strength on future behavior.
>But to say:"Yeah he is so much better looking than you." Just for saying it. Makes no sense to me.
Why would you do that?
Why not? Because it will hurt someone's feelings?
>Sorry I do not really understand what you want to tell me with that.
That's okay, it's pretty self-evident you don't understand, it's why you're making the statements you're making.
>And I use the quote to say that no human is really good because we are human.
1. "Good" doesn't exist in the absence of humans. Period. Unless you're appealing to some higher power.
2. If that's what you take the quote to mean, that seems to be a misunderstanding of "good" as "perfect".
>You assume I am unhappy with my current state, which I am not. I am in no cage or restricted.
You are always in a cage, if not in the temporal sense then in the mental one. If you think you aren't you don't understand the limits of human perception. You may be fine in the cage you are in, that does not mean you are not in a cage. Furthermore, everyone suffers. To say you aren't is just to put your suffering on a lower level then others.
>We always compare people and we get compared with other people.
This is correct as long as you believe it is correct. Ignore everyone and suddenly you are free from their expectations.>Why would you then say to your partner that they has to lose weight, or that they doesn't look like that person.
Why not?>Everything gets compared, mental or physical health, how we act around others, how we dress etc. I don't think we can't stop that really.
You are correct as long as you believe you are correct.>And sometimes it is necessary for example health.
It is never necessary. A healthy person will die someday, a sick one will die someday. What your baseline for healthy is is completely separate for someone else.
>What I wanted to say is that other people don't want a partner who doesn't know how to act in a relationship. That they don't want to waste time on explaining things or keep waitng because someone new to that needs more time.
There you go projecting your mental image on other people. How about you actually ask someone as oppose to assume it because you do? Am I saying no one is like that? No, you're the one making blanket statements.
>>58041>Why not? Because it will hurt someone's feelings?
Based retarded autist. Not wanting to unnecessarily hurt the feelings of the people you love and care about is something even an adult virgin like her with zero relationship experience understands!
>>58048> Not wanting to unnecessarily hurt the feelings
Ah, so we agree hurting people's feelings is a good thing sometimes.
Forget to add
*is a good thing when it's necessary somtimes
Duh. Sometimes it's necessary to hurt other people's feelings even when you don't want to. Like telling your siblings your mother passed away in the hospital just now, letting your best friend know you saw her boyfriend kiss and grope a girl last night and myriads of other situations.
Then we again that "not hurting someone's feelings" is not a universally good action. There are times when it is a good thing to hurt someone's feelings.
You don't even need this though, this assumes that hurt feelings are guaranteed. What about saying things that might
hurt someone's feelings? Like telling them that maybe being 600 pounds is not the healthiest lifestyle choice?
Not sure if I have replied to this old-ass thread yet but>I just want to know why is it always mentioned how girls have no trouble losing their virginity.
If you’re not a complete social recluse or morbidly afraid of men it’s easy. Even if you’re ugly, autistic, or generally undesirable. You basically just become friends with a guy that isn’t totally repulsive, you meet up alone, things escalate, then you do it. The guy will initiate most of it once he gets the go-ahead from you anyway Sometimes he won’t even need that >I have no idea how "normal" girls do it, do they just get drunk and let someone fuck them?
Sometimes. Most normal girls I know lose their virginity to their high school boyfriend when they’re 16-18 years old. The failed normies will lose it to some FWB in their early twenties (my method) and I’m sure a few seriously religious people lose it when they get married. The only people I know who get drunk and let someone fuck them have other issues (BPD, manic episode) but maybe that says more about the company I keep.>Is sex worth it?
With the right person, it can be. My first time was better than I thought it would be, but it’s nothing to ruin your life over. It’s a part of the human experience imo so I recommend doing it at some point in your lifetime when the moment arises but you shouldn’t be too excited about it.
I'm not attracted to anyone enough to want sex with them and I don't like relationships for the sake of relationships. I'm saving myself up for marriage but I'm pretty disillusioned about it so I think I'll be a virgin forever.
More or less the same.
Just that I never met someone I feel attracted to at all.
But I am not really sad about it.
I'm probably going to stay a virgin forever, I'm a chubby ugly neet so I have no friends or contact with society at all and that's fine to me. I'm okay with being alone, my sex drive isn't high anyway, it is what it is. But yeah it's definitely easier as a girl finding someone to lose your virginity. It's because men have a higher sex drive generally and are pushed to lose their virginity to "be a man"
and would settle for someone they don't 100% like for peer and society pressure, while females in some way are pushed to keep it and be "pure"(ew). I could probably find some guy in the world who would be willing to fuck me, but he'd probably think of me as a hole and that I'm ugly and fat so why would I…?
Why do you think you are ugly? And men can fall in love with the ugliest of women and feel sexual attraction towards them so that shouldn't be an impediment.
>>71270>men can fall in love with the ugliest of women
NAYRT Worst joke I've heard this week. Unless you're an ugly woman who magically found love, just shut up.
I'm in my early 20s and I just haven't had the chance to be with someone yet.
Haven't had friends since childhood, I never learned how to socialize or to be around others and now I'm just kind of stuck.
Combine that with low self-esteem and below average looks and yep, no wonder.
I don't mind it too much (most of the time), I'm too low functioning to have a relationship anyways.
i was a virgin (19) up until i met and moved in with my online boyfriend this summer. if not for him, i dont imagine i would ever lose my virginity. im really shy and awkward and could never initiate anything. (plus i dont like to be touched, and ive had to adapt to being held and stuff with my irl boyfriend) if we ever break up, i dont plan to have sex again, because this is the person i want to spend my life with and its not a big deal to me personally, but it is nice sometimes because i know it makes him happy and he loves me. that part is nice! but overall anon i dont think you are missing out really…
i forgot to mention i cried a lot the first few times and had to stop. but now its ok. i guess i just feel better knowing its only him and he loves me, i dont know how girls can have flings it seems so scary
No, no man is ever going to be with her if she only wants an ego-boosting tool and not a human.
Based, know your worth. He exists because I’m dating him, not even stacy btw.>>71400>no man is ever going to—
Cope kek, men are 100% more desperate to be with women than vice versa. If one lowly scrote won’t step up to the plate then another will. Women need to remember that the female kind does the choosing, leave unworthy males to die without getting to reproduce.
>>57235>such a man doesn't exist
What about simps, low self-esteem men, submissive and femenine types? They're the ones who wants a mommy dom partner, wtf.
>>71491>female kind does the choosing
I know this is a bit off topic but it's exactly because of this that I find promiscuous women so much worse than men. Their imperative, especially biologically, is to hump everything but as the selectors we have to be picky. That's literally all it means to be selective.
I've only been with men who I thought I'd eventually have a family with, but because enough women whore out now it's become somewhat expected which is disgusting. I wish we were more cohesive, honestly either way. If we were all promiscuous or all chaste I just don't like the expectations set when it's this mixed.
Oral sex is sodomy
The fact you have to dissociate from it shows your natural positive shame in the act. Why push pass that into sin?
>>71775>asking a question>two years ago
do you actually expect an answer?
Incels are wrong on many things, but they are completely correct when it comes to virginity and women.
Really, it's not hard at all to lose your virginity as a woman. You can test this yourself on any online dating website, men will flood your inbox and happily relieve you. I mean, here's someone who posted eggy, incel par exellence, as a "woman" on tinder and got hundreds of offers of sex.
To argue that women have just as much difficulty as men, then, on this issue is clearly proposterous. What needs to be differentiated then is "sex" and "intimacy". The former is easy for women to get and hard for men to get; the latter is hard for women to get, and easy for men to get.
Don't forget that women simply don't value the fact that men want to fuck them, because men will fuck literally everything. Only men see sex as a value. They're also incapable of actual love.
I didn't lose my virginity until I was 22 I think. I was ugly in high school. I became less ugly in college but I studied fashion so there were no straight boys around. I had to use tinder really aggressively to meet straight men. I dated about 5 or 6 guys until I found someone I liked and started dating him. He became my boyfriend and we had sex after maybe 2 months of dating. I really liked sex at first but now I'm not as interested in it. No man has ever made me cum and tbh I don't know if a man really could make me cum even though I'm straight. I've only ever done it when masturbating. >>71783
Incels are correct that its very easy to find a man to have sex with, but what they fail to grasp is that 99% of men are fucking repulsive and unfuckable, for reasons that have nothing to do with height or most of the other shit they sperg off about. The problem is that most men can't dress themselves, actively choose to have no grooming or skincare routine, and have very few interesting hobbies, goals or accomplishments. Seriously the number of 20something year old men who look like their mother still buys their clothes for them in walmart multipacks is just staggering. Beyond this, even among the attractive men out there, so few of them are actually good at foreplay or being seductive.
Yes but that is because scrote are retarded coombrains. None of that evidence means those moids will stay with "trans" eggman. Getting matched on Tinder is not equal to a relationship, it means dude's initially horny and doesn't have the imagination to just fap one out that's all. It's bottom of the barrel pathetic people who match to that.
>>71874>Seriously the number of 20something year old men who look like their mother still buys their clothes for them in walmart multipacks is just staggering.
I cackled while reading this it's too hilariously accurate. My ex boyfriend would only wear graphic tees and DBZ shirts. It is absolutely frustrating, straight men have no sense of fashion whatsoever. It's not even that hard to try and dress up nice.
I was socially anxious to the point of being mistaken as a non-verbal autistic from the ages of 8-15.
Around the age of 11, I moved to a different country. Middle school was fucking horrible. Had no friends, felt alienated, and just spent all of my time indoors, playing games, and posting on 2010's /b/ (yes, at as young as 11-12, which is horrible).
Was sexually assaulted when I was 11-12 in middle school by boys in the class, so I kind of associated sex with unwanted male attention early on; greasy unshowered boys going through puberty, groping me. Gross. I mostly isolated myself from people. Was very misanthropic, felt invisible, like a true femcel.
I spent a lot of my time online on /b/, video-chatting with /b/tards in Tinychat, and had, "I'm so mature for my age"-syndrome, and was groomed by an online pedophile group.
I liked the attention, so I'd do, "random, quirky XD" lolcow-tier shit to garner the attention I wasn't getting IRL.
Probably would have had my own Lolcow thread back in the day. Dunno where my parents were.
I was a dumb-ass, and got nude online at one point (and they weren't even like ~sexy~ nudes either, I mostly did it for shock value, did weird shit like put underwear on my head, spoke in a weird Southern accent, stupid kid stuff), and I had to be homeschooled because I was blackmailed with my nudes at 12, and it's even worse because when those videos got spread around, I'm doing all of this weird shit in them.
I was SCREAMED at by police, basically called a whore, threatened to be put in jail for producing/distributing child porn, my entire family saw all of the videos, yeah… just humiliating.
I have sexual repression issues now, because anytime I think of sex, I just get filled with shame and self hatred. It ruined my life, literally was a middle school drop out. Luckily, I'm in college now, and got my shit together later on in life, but I associated sex with predatory or creepy behavior from a very young age.
Now, that I'm older, I still have that residual trauma, I guess.
>>71913>police blaming the child for being groomed and abused
Fuck this earth.
I'm 22, almost 23 and I'm still a virgin. Various reasons. I've grown sheltered in catholic family and I've never had any friends, male or female. I guess.. right now it's to late for that dating stuff. I feel to tired for this. And men started to scare me. I don't know from where this fear came from but yes, it's there, all the time. Maybe it's because I don't see how anyone could be with me, you know? I don't have anything to offer. No beauty, no interesting hobbies. And even if someone would be so desperate as to want to date me, I'm not sure if I'd want to. There is of course this fear. But also, I just hate myself when I'm with men. When I happen to talk to them, I become super submissive. It's like i don't have an opinion on my own, I agree to everything, and I behave obsequiously. Like a lackey. But all the time, deep inside, I feel so ill and angry. It's my fault, of course, but I don't want this kind of relationship. Although maybe it's what I deserve? I don't know anymore.
My family is pretty traditional. Not the "pre-marital sex is a sin" kind, but more the "promiscuity devalues you" kind. Most of the women in my family only dated a few men before marrying or just settling down, and the idea of having sex young or just sleeping around for fun was looked down on and pretty openly viewed as something only done by women of lower character. In men it was expected, but never accepted. I recall my aunts and cousins complaining about their husbands having slept with 5+ women, and how it lowered their opinion of them.
My cousin practically raised me after my dad died, so he eventually gave me 'the talk' and stressed that no matter what our family said, it was up to me to decide how I want to live my life. Later, I had a crush on a guy and asked him what he'd do and he told me how he went out of his way to lose his virginity with a girl he hated, just because he was turning 18 and didn't want to be mocked by his friends. He always regretted not waiting for someone he cared about. I guess that stuck with me.
I went to uni with one of my cousins who was a little older, and had spent 3 years traveling after graduating high school. From day one she was drunk nearly daily and fucking a rotation of men. She always complained about passing out and waking up in the bed of a guy she didn't like - yet she never changed. I was exposed to her friends who would do the same, just fuck an ever-changing rotation of guys and constantly complain about UTI's, STI's and bad sex. The sight of them, and the knowledge of the thinking that eventually led my cousin to contracting oral gonorrhea - which permanently gave her a raspy, deeper voice - just sent shivers down my spine.
The idea of just finding a guy to fuck me just because I can, feels cheap, degrading and degenerate. I try not to judge other people, and would never tell them, but I do think less of women who simply gave away their virginity or who have promiscuous sex. I can't help but wonder if it's just a disregard for their own body, some kind of oppositional defiance to modesty, or just a lack of impulse control. I feel genuinely awful for thinking it, but I just see it as evidence of them having weak character and a lack of integrity.
>I have no idea how "normal" girls do it, do they just get drunk and let someone fuck them?
>Is sex worth it?
I’m 30+ virgin
Also am the opposite of religious, fedora tipper or what was the meme, but I don’t drink alcohol or meet people. I haven’t had friends for over a decade and most people find their bfs through friends (or bar hopping).
Far below average looks and social anxiety are the killer combination for making a 30-something spinster virgin.
I was too young, 13 I think. I lost it to a boy my age and I was super curious about sexual stuff, but I didn't really want to have sex.
mid-20s now, I just pretend it never happened. I've slept with lots of people after that. some I regret, some I don't, some were coerced/pressured, some were actually forced.
haha I hate myself
13 is the average virginity losing age in Sweden.
damn anon, I didn't know that
makes me feel a little better
13 is a little young but not completely out of the ordinary. Unless you thought you were raped or something then it's not really something to beat yourself up over.
felt this way but lost it to my bf at 25. personally, i can't imagine doing it with someone i don't intend to marry or stay with very long term, because it requires a lot of intimacy and vulnerability.
Wow, we are eerily similar.
I could have lost my virginity at 18, but I kept turning the moid down because I hated my body. Only regret it .01%. He was pretty gross.
The difference between posters from ~2 years ago and those from the last few months is scary in this thread…
Men ruin everything. Male communities like 4chan are shit, so they see a decent community like this one, invade it, and also slowly turn it to shit.
>Is sex worth it?
I lost my virginity recently, it fucking sucked. I didn't know what to do, plus he completely ghosted me afterwards.
>>73849>plus he completely ghosted me afterwards
The reason why I refuse to lose my virginity. Can't take this risk.
I'm sorry it wasn't a good experience for you, anon.
I feel all the posts talking about not liking anyone enough to consider sex
I'll probably stay a virgin forever because no guy I've met has been worth having sex with. the ones who might be are happily married and I'm happy for them. Life is good and busy enough without sex, and weirdly complicated with it.
If men weren't famous as a population for being terrible in bed, overwhelmingly cumbrained, and not really put together until middle age (if ever), I might consider it.