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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 106448

Being emotionally dependent as a woman is the worst thing in the world. I wish I could get over it but it's so hard for me with the lack of love in my childhood. All men disappoint me, they are all superficial. For example, if you are a bitch but ugly they see you as a psychopath but if you are pretty they forgive you even the most horrible thing. When I broke up with my ex-boyfriend he started sending me messages telling me that he was meeting other girls prettier than me (during that time I was a bit plump) and he was really fat but for some reason he thought he was a 10/10 and that helped him to find another girl.All men end up hurting me,they demand perfection but not with themselves.
How man can have this high self steem even if they are a fat loser?

Anonymous 106450


Males are nothing. A lot of what you describe sounds like the dude just pulling a "gotcha" moment on you, so you'd defer to him. He still wants you to defer to him, he still cares about what you think of him. See how pitiful and needy? Don't take him back if he decides to crawl back, 'cause he very likely might. I've had a man forever ago whom I considered my sweetheart, and in his insecurity he walked all over me, and started bringing up conversations about other women. At first, subtly, but later he was basically rubbing in my face that he was planning to go out with some random girl. I am neither ugly nor a bitch, so these are not the variables that affect your stance with men. It's on them and it's their insecurity. And yes, most males are deeply insecure, they hate themselves and they hate you for being with them by proxy. They will go through as many women as they can get their hands on. Everyone gets a free ride, y'know?

I hope you feel better, anon. I also don't come from the best of homes so I understand the burning desire for love and appreciation. What's important is that you understand that men are very unlikely to give that to you, so much so that you'd end up getting traumatized seven times over before meeting "the one", so invest all of that energy into yourself instead. Remove the middleman (male validation) entirely.

Maybe start with some powerbuffs to self-esteem, since that's likely the culprit here? Picrel might prove useful (from pinkpill thread #5 on /b/, I will love you forever anon who wrote it).

Anonymous 106451

> if you are a bitch but ugly they see you as a psychopath but if you are pretty

yep. both of my exes dumped me and called me severely abusive/scary because I was angry when they lied to me for years about substance abuse. meanwhile one of them straight up wrote love songs for the ex who cheated on him and dumped him and refuses to think poorly of his mother who cheated on his father and destroyed his family. meanwhile, my one friend's mom cheated on my friend's dad and divorced him when he had a brain tumor and he's still concerned for her welfare. my first ex found out my mom had cancer and never reached out despite us dating for 6 years. moids really are worthless scum

Anonymous 106467

Thank you Nona,i break up with him last year and i was feeling really good with myself (i started to lose weight,do exercise and start to have more hobbies like learning guitar) but i think i have the same low self steem. I don't know how yo change it.
And my mental health started to rot when him send me messages saying i am a psychopath,a bitch and things like to make me feel guilt for being mad at him when he cheated on me. I admit that i was a really angry when he do that but i forget that until they send me that messages last month.

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