/feels/ - Advice & Venting

I didn't think I did until I nailed my first one with settling into an actual career where I'm respected by society. Recently I've been stuck on essentially gamifying my progression in life and it weirdly works. I backtracked from career and focused on mastering a hobby, which was painting minis for a hobby I gave up years ago. Now I'm really focused on nailing down the husband, house and kids in that order. I'm 50% of the way to a husband, I have the house at around 75%, but kids are still at 0% because I need to finish the first two before I can even consider it. After that, I plan to move my milestone goals back to my career, then to social and community.

>>112906
Save money and buy a cool farm house with chickens

I really want to be a university professor in what I'm currently studying sooo bad. I used to be super anti-natalist but I have either started secreting strange hormones or have realised I want a legacy or something or children for some other selfish reason (I really don't want to birth them)

>>112914
Also this! I would be happy dying with a cool cottage house with chickens and strawberries

>>112911
Good for you . You seem really smart tbh, I need to learn how to compartmentalize different aspects of my life better. Gamifying your goals is hardcore.
>>112914
If only nona. A secluded self-sufficient life has been a long time dream of mine.
>>112919
>university professor
That's a neat career path, what are you studying? if you don't mind sharing!
>I used to be super anti-natalist but I have either started secreting strange hormones or have realised I want a legacy or something or children for some other selfish reason (I really don't want to birth them)
Oh God that's exactly what happened to me. It started likeee a year and half ago? And it's only gotten worse since. I've always been pretty unsure about the future tbh, been ruminating a lot on these things recently. Bleh.

Happy, healthy relationship with a husband or wife. At least one kid. Be able to take care of my parents.

i would like to have a boyfriend/husband and live with him but at t his rate i dont see that happening like ever lmao…i would geta a job after uni and those two r maybe the most traditional normal thing id like. im like 100% sure i dont want kids pregnancy disgusts me and i dont think i would be a good mother to the kids, or enjoy parenthood so its a no no to me. thats it ig

>>112906
Yeah I think the next step in life for me is to get married and have kids. Though I'm not sure if that'll ever happen kek. Just like you nona I don't think I can be a good parent with my mental health issues and don't want to make my kids feel miserable. Also I can't trust any moid 100%

I sometimes dream of being a housewife but I don’t trust moids so looks like I’ll have to give up on that dream.

I want a house (or ideally a small farm house) and a quiet 9 to 5 lifestyle. That's about the extend of my traditional life goals. I'm not interested in marriage or kids. I'm frankly not even that interested in settling down with a life partner but I'll probably have to if I ever want to own my own property in this economy.

>>112922
> what are you studying?
I'm studying philosophy but not in a pretentious or moidy way I swear!!!!
> that's exactly what happened to me.
I'm glad I'm not the only one, it's so weird because I was SO against the idea of ever having children for countless reasons. I wonder if it's a hormonal thing or something or if that's just a myth spread by moids and I am simply growing up and being more conscious of the remainder of my life. I am also unsure about the future, I think I could be happy either way and I hope you are too, if it's what we really want we can do it and if not we can just not!!!!

I definitely have a dream of getting my own house with a white fence and garden. But I don't want marriage or kids, maybe some short-term relationships with moids at best since nearly all moids here are not childfree and I probably would end up living and retire with my female partner instead in a Boston marriage later in life

>>112906
Kind of. I'd like to be able to provide for my wife one day, while also taking on the role of house-wife.
I just like the idea of cleaning and cooking all day, while also being the bread-winner of the house-hold. I just want to come home everyday to see my wife living a leisurely lifestyle and dote her.
Does anyone else feel the same way?

>>113032
I want a Boston marriage too tbh. Settling down and growing old with my best friend (not that I have one) sounds like a dream. I just don't know how to make it happen.

Yeah but it’s never been super concrete like it seemed to be for other girls. None of the “engaged by 23, married by 25, first kid by 27” that I was surrounded by but I always knew that if I was going to have kids, I’d have to start by 30 and I did. I think it’s good to have an outline but be open to suggestion.
I always saw traditional life as one of many paths that I could take. I can see myself as a SAHM with 3-4 kids all 3 years apart. I can just as easily see myself as a OAD with a career at a nonprofit or small business making a difference in my community. I can even sometimes see myself as a childfree single who dedicates her life to writing and illicit affairs.
I think every thinking woman feels this way, eventually you just need to choose your path if it doesn’t choose you. I for one always knew I wanted children but also knew I wanted it the typical way (no science babies/single mom by choice) or not at all. I’m sure that could apply to any “goal”, even ones that are seemingly out of women’s control.
And about the having children thing, I don’t think anyone NEEDS to do it to be fulfilled. Just because it’s a biological imperative doesn’t mean that every member of the species needs to do it. I don’t mean this in an anti-natalist way obviously
Life has whatever meaning you give it: it’s actually that simple.