>im trying to dumb myself down You're doing a good job. This post is borderline incoherent. It sounds like you need to learn to be mindful of your goals when you interact with people. Are you trying to build a relationship? Then don't be "observant and smart and judigng". Instead, use your wits to ask thoughtful questions. If you are speaking to a "finance bro", maybe ask about his investments, or something else relevant. It will make him feel validated. Don't pretend to be stupid. You'll only set yourself up for exploitation by underselling yourself.