/feels/ - Advice & Venting

The Japanese say we have three faces. I'm too lazy to remember what they were, so you look it up for yourself.

>>122671
https://psychclassics.yorku.ca/Jung/types.htm
>4. The Extraverted Feeling-Type
yw nona
>inb4 "dividing people into groups creates othering" - recognize that humans have developed a group survival mechanism where we each get born with specific focuses which allows for insight and creation within the domain, this creates personal blindspots which others of the group are supposed to support. This is why the modern world sucks, we are supposed to live in tribes of up to 100 people, individualism and democracy create a state where we're supposed to all be equal and are measured by very specific criteria that aren't even supposed to be on the mind of some types of people - by making them change to fit what is expected a lot of value is lost as a society.
So to nona - what is your gift, which in a hypothetical world where there was a tribe of 100 people would be treasured?
Whatever the answer is, try to create it in your own life.

"no sense of self" is a feature of some cluster b personality disorders and some others. it primarily stems from trauma. I think all you can do is gradually expressing yourself more and more, as much as you can. (and deal with the things that prevent you from doing so)

>>122684
mbti shit is retarded enough as it is, trying to tell people feeling empty inside is normal is harmful

>>122671
The woman on the right looks like JK Rowling

>>122685
>trying to tell people feeling empty inside is normal is harmful
Wrong. Trying to tell people that it's not normal to feel empty inside in todays day and age os harmful.
>retarded mbti
>goes on to talk about cluster b as if that's not stereotyping and scapegoating a societal problem on to the individual.
Bravo, you seem to have a PhD in gaslighting.

>>122707
shut up retard

>>122708
Heh

>>122697
>Zoomers don't know Meryl Streep
I feel old now :(

>>122751
That doesn't change the fact that she looks like JK Rowling

>>122761

Hope your eyes start working again soon

>>122684
When i took this test this isn't even what i got, it was infp i think. but i don't really believe in personality tests as a concept honestly

>>122685
Everytime I think im expressing myself I realize in one way or another its not real, and I end up starting all over again with something new. I've kinda accepted it lately though. If there's no me, that means I can just have fun with my personality/appearance. I don't know if that's good or bad but it feels nice.

>>122853
>I can just have fun with my personality/appearance. I don't know if that's good or bad but it feels nice.
it sounds good to me and I felt the same way once! Of course, in the end it's gonna be up to you whether it's good or not.

Yeah, expressing oneself is hard when you've never really been allowed to, but I think it's super rewarding. You get in touch with your true desires, after all.

everyone has different personas? who the hell are you hanging around? fake ass bitch

>>122877
What she's referring to is code switching and what she suffers from is some kind of emergent sociopathy

>>122671
>I know everyone has different personas

bitch whaaAAAAat? you don't think there are real people? everyone's an actor?

>>122879
>>122877

Not that other people aren't real, just that most people behave differently in different settings. I guess I mean code switching like the other reply. Just for me its hard to do that and still have a sense of self.

>>122878
Emergent sociopathy? When I was a kid I wondered if I had aspd, but I feel like I care too much about other people for that. But its supposed to be a spectrum so idk. But please tell me more.

>>122890
i agree with what the other poster said, these are all just carefully elaborate degrees of being fake.

i really could not care less if anyone believes this is normal or not. if normality is what you measure up to then you are nothing but a compliant slave looking to participate in the corruption.

it is better to be an honest street sweeper then a dishonest king because being fake is unbearable. it demands everything, it ruins everything. so what if you can be fake and become rich, it is not worth the feeling of having succumbed to corruption and hate yourself.

>>122938
If you intend on being alone for the rest of your life that's fine. Some of us want things in life though

>>123020
>Some of us want things in life though

what is it that is so great that you agree to lower yourself to being fake to get it? is it wealth? it is probably wealth. you think being fake in a big house is better then being real in a small shack.

thread derailed by neurotic schizo

>>123027
Projecting? If you're unhappy with your lack of money that's okay, but don't make a big deal out of trying to accept it.

I am nothing. My whole life is built around a façade of normality but when I sit in my house after a long day at work I just feel tired and empty. There are a lot of days where I just sit and cry because I have no idea who I am or what I'm doing. I never have. I find pretending exhausting, by the end of my work I'm so drained that I can't even stomach doing anything.

Once upon a time I clung to 'sister' as my personality. It was the one thing in my life that made me feel normal, happy, even loved. Like everything else in my life I just couldn't hold onto it and that too fell apart. My brother hates me, my grandparents and mother don't reach out anymore. I have no friends, I never have, I don't think I even know how. One way or another I either push people away or make them hate me.

All I do is fill my days with meaningless impermanent pastimes until I'm tired enough to go to sleep as I march towards my last day. I can only hope that if there is an afterlife it's much better than this one.

I've never not felt like myself. I couldn't imagine being a disingenuous bitch my whole life. I mean what I say and say what I mean. I don't attract fake people either, I only surround myself with real ones.

>>123281
I could've written this, I really don't know what I'm living for.

>>123281
Personality and identity spiral down infinitely you will never catch them when looking. The trick is to not fall into routine and take notes of what you enjoy and dislike. Over time you will build a basic personality description ANY preferences at all count for this not just the big stuff. Stuff like “kind”, “smart” and "jealous" are only reliable when observed by others. If you don't experience joy at all that's a whole medical thing.

>>123281

>I have no friends, I never have, I don't think I even know how.

it's might be more difficult as an adult because of political and ideological differences but don't let that stop you. adults can still make friends.

in the context of contemporary culture: the reason you want friends (because you are trapped in an awful life) is the reason everyone wants friends. most people consider themselves broken in some way and hope others to fix them and it never works. the way to make people want to be friends with you is to be complete in yourself and then you have an aura that people can sense. this aura manifests in little details that are hard to fake (because whoever understood them would prefer to be real over being fake).

tldr instead of hoping to find friends that give meaning to your life, the way to have friends is to complete yourself and endure the hordes of people who refuse to complete themselves and then hope for you to fix them. you become the thing you wish you had for other people and you will have what people call friends these days.

>>123282
Im a very honest person. Im up front about my intentions and i don't do anything malicious. Not having a reliable sense of self doesn't automatically make me a "disingenuous bitch."

>>123326
>Im a very honest person.

just never say that. what are you, an idiot? you don't think a dishonest person would be able to say that even though it isn't true? that's direct self-characterization. that is not for you to judge or proclaim. everyone wants to be considered honest, it is advantageous, but few people are willing to pay the price of honesty and you just announcing how honest you are does nothing but announce your ignorance and lack of social experience.

if you are honest, people will take notice. don't notice it for them, that's patronizing Kelly Kapoor behavior. don't enter a situation insisting that you are honest, that's offensive to intelligent people because they will judge that based on your behavior anyways.

what is your plan if someone interrupts you and says "i don't think you are that honest…"? confront that person? talk over that person? talk longer and louder and then have the last word? you don't think ahead and you are probably too self-absorbed to notice your surroundings. don't be so blunt, relax, take a break from trying to micromanage people and have some grace.