how to stop being mentally ill in my relationship? Anonymous 122806
it's been some time since i've started officially dating a girl that i've been friends with for a while. we're pretty close, and i love her more than i can really put into words. but, i've been struggling with anxiety in our relationship. if she doesn't text me back within an hour, i start to get anxious and worry that she's mad at me. even if she has a totally reasonable excuse that she's told me beforehand, i still worry. do to something that happened between us in the past, i have a really serious fear of her leaving me.
how do i stop myself from getting anxious and worked up when she doesn't text me back? something i do now is deleting instagram, so i don't have to worry about getting a notification that she's texted me. it helps a bit, but i still can't help but worry.
Anonymous 122809
>>122806sounds to me that "stopping being mentally ill" over it is just putting a fig leaf over the real problem. do you have low self esteem, nobody else other than her who can tend to your needs etc
>do to something that happened between us in the past, i have a really serious fear of her leaving me.what is it?
Anonymous 122819
>>122809i mean, i would probably argue that i have low self esteem lol. but she makes me feel loved, which is why i love her so much. i have other friends that i like, but not in the same way i like her.
>what is it?i’d rather not say, but she didn’t cheat on me or anything. it’s not really something i hold against her either.
Anonymous 122822
>>122819idk how to put it but I think this feeling signals a legitimate concern that she doesn't make you feel safe
doesn't mean she's a bad gf but maybe you don't feel you can rely on her to take your side
or not to violate her boundaries
just minute things that are important but you forget about eventually while your subconscious still buzzes about it
