>>127930I mean. its gonna require tons of patience from you, but dont forget you also have needs that need to be met by him. I guess using "I" statements instead of more "accusatory" ones, could prevent him from getting his guard up? For example:
- accusatory: "You didn't text me back😡! what were you doing!!"
- I: "I feel worried and hurt when I see you haven't texted me back, despite being online. It would help me if you could at least send a quick text, that you're busy, so I know you're okay and that it isn't personal."
Try naming how it makes you feel (and hopefully he can start doing this too), and then offer a solution (what he can do) or think of one together. This way he can recognize what behavior needs to be changed and how. Maybe my example was a bit silly but you understand the gist of it.
Furthermore communication is just going to be important, and patience. I see you struggle with this, but youre both going to have to push through to make it work. And if youre both being receptive to one another, it will hopefully become easier as time passes.
I'm also going to GUESS and say that your boyfriend has insecurities due to his past relationship, so perhaps words of affirmations could be nice (that you love him), or along with whatever other love language he's receptive to.
