/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>132248
Like with any other mental issue, try to understand when and where it came from. If it’s something you’ve struggled with your whole life, your chemistry is just playing tricks on you. If it came later, understand what caused it. Once you know what’s going on it has less power over you.

>>132250
thank you so much nona, i dont think i've suffered from it my whole life because i used to be real happy and carefree, i would like to go back to that.
I've always had the thing to overthink about stuff but i think it worsened when i was in high school, should i see if it's releated to that?
Thanks again

>>132251
I mean more specific than that. It will require a lot of reflection, it’s not something you can really get through in a few minutes. Think back to those years really hard and what you went through. And understand the way you are now is never a way you were destined to be.

>>132252
That sound like a nice starting point, thank you so much.
Only one other thing, if i effectively think i've found the source, how can i begin to accept it? never quiet got the concept

>>132253
We are what we eat. Just as you got yourself into an algorithm, you can get yourself out. It is of course really difficult (especially the older you get), but personally just the thought that I’m not “broken” is already comforting.

If I can compare to myself, I know for a fact I developed OCD (or at least had it worsened) around the same time I took an increased academic pressure. The more I was forced to be detail-oriented the more it bled into other aspects of my life. My mom might have also been an influence. But once I realized that I had wrapped up my self-worth with my ability to perform, I realized my desire for success was the very thing that was torturing me. Whether I want to trade-off this hyper-aware state for a perceived risk to my career (that may or may not even be real) is something I ask myself everyday, but at least I know that it’s not some unspeakable curse that was placed on me so much as a series of small and fairly predictable reactions to the situations I was in.

>>132254
This is wonderful advice, thank you nona, may Whenever you believe in bless you.
Im also glad that you found a way to get better with yourself, you dont deserve to be measured purely by your success

You need adderall. Or weed. Definitely one or the other

>>132256
yeah i could use a real good joint

>>132255
>You don’t deserve to be measured by your success
And that’s the funny thing. I’ve noticed that when people see a person with similar struggles to their own, they often react with a level of empathy they wouldn’t even give themselves. If we could only view ourselves with such a similar outside perspective, it would help a lot. So I appreciate your kind words and I wish you the best as well. I can also tell you that you are more than any given thought you’ve had or thing you’ve done, and the fact that you’re having this conversation right now is proof enough that you cared and tried your best.

>>132259
thanl you so so much for your kind words, i really needed them tonight. I wish you all the best!

if you ask yourself the same questions enough times, you'll get bored of them. you'll start to wonder why you're pouring so much attention into unlikely possibilities. it helped for me to keep asking myself, on impulse every time i had a bad thought, "why're you bothering with something so boring" and it killed my interest.
if you're excited or engaged by your own terrible thoughts, and can't stop thinking of new connections & bad ways to see things, then that's maybe why it keeps happening regardless of repetitiveness. at that point you can try and detach from it, seeing the situation as something comical, like "wow, i'm coming up with so many farfetched explanations, what can i think of next?" basically treating it without seriousness. i don't know if this would work for others, because it's probably wiser to unpack the source of anxiety instead of internally mocking it.
for worrying about the opinions of people in your life - i saw a post about a girl who vocalised to someone how she imagines that they hate talking to her, and they replied with "why would you think that about me?" and it was a helpful reminder that when i imagine people as hateful in my head, i'm lying about what i've seen of who they are. it's a disservice, and a waste of time if there's no other reason to believe they hate me