/feels/ - Advice & Venting

I don't think it's normal for random guys to approach you and give you flowers.

This could be a lot of things, but I think a huge part of this may be poor socialization or some form of anxiety where your mind exaggerates bad situations.
The fact that you don't get along kinda signals this, because your family is among your first social environments, and if you fail that stage, then you may enter a downward spiral socially.

Read about "double empathy problem".

In short:
- Neurotypical x Neurotypical - Good
- Neurodiverse x Neurodiverse - Good
- Neurotypical x Neurodiverse - Bad

Even my supposedly "best friend" expects decorum and doesn't like it when I make jokes because it's about poo, pee and dying most of the time.
I relate to each and every experience of yours, nona.

>>132956
This, investing in them seriously especially when they're young is insanity

become your own best friend, when you have yourself as a friend you never truly are alone. you can always learn a new skill or pick up a hobby that interests you and become interesting if you stick with it. if it doesnt work out then you have the experience and can at least talk about and connect with others. its better to be alone than with shallow people who only take, it will suck for a long time until you find good people who truly care about you and want to spend time with you because of you not because of what you can do for them. love yourself, and your shine will attract people, after that its your duty to cut off the leeches and embrace the loving ones. I have been alone for about 10years, stuck in a dead relationship for about 6 of them, and now i have a great bestie who loves me and i love her. i honestly didnt think it was possible, but here i am. i hope you find self acceptance and good people in your life, do not give up

>>132955
If you wallow like that you actually make it worse and start to come off clingy. Your personality suffers, it becomes dull, performative. People pick up on that.

You have to enjoy your own presence and self 100%, before you go seeking people out because it doesn't matter what your personality's like, how generous you are, what you look like people can just be soul-sucking. Do not rely on people rely more on yourself. You can only really vibe along. If you ever find people you like its always because you were vibing along and you werent trying.

>>133000
Fair warning people will still be soul-sucking when you're doing this so prioritize your own company more than anything anyway. Never expect peoples company will be better than your own 8 times out of 10.

Didn't know bots were posting on imageboards >>133000

>>133000
How am I a bot? My previous post was deleted so I tried rewriting it. You mind explaining where it went?

I spoke something, but it's so so long that I think I will try to make it as short as possible so you can understand. And basically, your social misery is not from you as yourself, instead, it comes from your family. And my, a friend of mine, an old friend of mine, has something similar.

His father was a narcissist, her mother was bipolar, she had severe, pretty severe depression and alcoholism. She would take alcohol instead of taking her own pills, even if she was very good to me, as her father was.

And you have to take this with a grain of salt because I think you might need therapy and psychology if possible. If not, research it on your own, because the social misery you are talking about here, is because of your family. Your family is so miserable they failed yo raise you properly.

Because society is ingrained in little, like, parts and little cycles, little patterns. In that patterns, you have to learn since you are a child that every little thing socially has a reaction, has a consequence. And each little thing, for example, well, making friends is rather than something fun it's also a cope for survival, because everyone had friends back in middleschool, and I knew if I made a friend, it would mean I was not socially in trouble.

And each friend I made was rather done for my own pleasure, it was more of how to survive. I socialized to survive in school. I rarely had any real friends in school, even to highschool. I only had one friend who actually became a friend of mine and played with me, and then another friend of mine I knew well enough as a sister. My parents spoke often about how I became more shy or stopped being as social as before, yet it was because I was not interested in such dynamics anymore.

Each person the played a social role, played a social dynamic that even if I understood, I was not interested in interacting with that kind of logic. And understanding that kind of stuff will make you open your eyes and realize that you have a miserable social life because your parents didn't raise you proper, because they are miserable.

A miserable father will rarely raise a happy child. That's why, I mean, I'm against miserable people having children because their children will be miserable, and miserable people will make miserable societies most of the time. It's very rare for a miserable man to have a happy child. And you have to go through it and accept that, make peace with the fact that you are miserable. Your life is miserable.

And one day, if you decide to form a family, your family will be miserable. I say it as from woman to woman, please never marry a man thinking it will make you less miserable. Marrying a man to escape misery is the worst you can do, because men in desperate times will only so bring you more misery if he fakes and then gives you bad surprises.

What you describe nona is way way much more commmon than you think, and it's so so sad that miserable people have children. Because no woman should deserve to experience such misery.

Blessings and high hopes for you.