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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021


Anonymous 53670

How would you make up for cheating on someone you love? Not necessarily because you got caught.

Asking for a friend.

Anonymous 53671

That can't be done, but I'd try to minimise the damage I caused by being honest with my partner about what happened, apologising for my behaviour and ending the relationship.

Anonymous 53672

Depends, why did you do it?

Anonymous 53673

Honesty is the best policy.

Anonymous 53674

>love someone
>cheat on them
Can you even say you loved them in the first place?

Anonymous 53675

No. I'll do anything.
I got drunk and horny. I didn't mean to cheat but it just happened. It's not like I had real sex either.

Anonymous 53676

What would stop you from doing this again?

Anonymous 53677

>I'll do anything.
Except the right thing, evidently.

Anonymous 53678


You're gonna get a lot of admonition in this thread and rightly so. I originally cooked up a rather unpleasant plate of greentext upsetti spaghetti at you but after thinking on it I really only have a few things to say.

First: shame on you. Secondly, your relationship is over. It was over before you got drunk and had "not real sex" with someone else. Come to terms with this. Unless you are a legit psychopath you already know this is the end state now.

Finally, you said you weren't caught but you need to fess up. I can see from the posts from you here that you are desperately trying to claw back some kind of control over this and maybe make excuses like "not real sex" and "not meaning to cheat" (as if anybody ever really means to be unfaithful and it isn't a combination of factors). You owe it to your partner to be up front. The future of your relationship is now in their hands. They get to decide whether you deserve forgiveness or not. There isn't really much you can do in this situation beyond being honest and accepting your fate.

Shame on you. You don't know what love is.

Anonymous 53679

I would commit Sudoku or give them a set of stones to lapidate myself with.
No forgiveness shall be granted to betrayers of vows.

Anonymous 53680


Honestly, after being cheated on I wish I never found out and the relationship was just ended instead. It ruined my self esteem and trust for others completely for so many years. I know everyone is saying you should fess up but I think you should just break up and not say a word about the cheating. I guess that would just be my preference if I ever got cheated on again. What you dont know can't hurt you. If you do tell them though expect your relationship to work out, it won't. They may try to make it work but it'll eat up at them eventually.

Anonymous 53681

By leaving them and giving them a chance to move on to someone who isn't a disloyal, selfish piece of shit.

Anonymous 53682

When I got cheated on, I never forgave the person, but I had to find out on my own means (they would have never told me,) and it was going on for over a year. I am also not very forgiving in general. He apologized over and over again and I caught him in even more lies when he was apologizing (he didn't know I talked to the other woman), and then, he really fucked up his "chances". He died and we ended on really bad terms because I was never able to forgive him. I think I would have been a lot more kind/understanding if he was honest with me, and didn't bullshit me throughout the entire relationship. It has made me develop extreme trust issues because he lied so much. I now have a complex that there's always something going on underneath the scenes that I don't know about

Anonymous 53683

You know, the right thing isn't always the best thing. Admitting cheating would probably ruin lives for OP and her bf.

I'ts better to keep quiet and simply to do nothing.

Anonymous 53684


Men are pigs. If they were in your shoes they would instantly take every chance they have to sleep around, so dont feel bad about it. In many ways they deserve it, if not for their past actions then their future ones.

Anonymous 53685

b8 or mentally ill

Anonymous 53686

OP should just be honest with her bf. Plenty of people take a cheating s.o. back and if this ends the relationship, it was probably not meant to be. It'll fix your guilt either way.

While I agree about men and cheating, you shouldn't use it to justify your actions Stacy.

Anonymous 53687

>I just accidentally had several minutes of foreplay, undressed, spread my legs and let someone insert and pull out their penis for about 5 minutes until orgasm

Anonymous 53688

So all men are g-g-g-gay?!

Anonymous 53690

They are. Why do you think all of them have a pleasure spot in their buttholes?

Anonymous 53691


Anonymous 53693

>He died
Hold up, he what now?

Anonymous 53694

Men are meant to be penetrated by another man's penis, not by a large female hand or by an artificial item (pegging). All men are inherently gay. Or bisexual.

Anonymous 53695

Your only choice now is opening the relationship, so that the two of you drift apart even more and eventually break up completely like a star slowly being ripped to pieces by a black hole

Anonymous 53696

Cheating only does harm if the person being cheated on knows.

Anonymous 53697

kill yourself

Anonymous 53698

I'd tell them, then end the relationship, acknowledging that I ruined it

Anonymous 53699

>all men are scum who'll cheat on you every chance they get
>so you should be scum too, trust me sister

Anonymous 53700

She's right. People cheat all the time and blow it off as one time mistakes, you would be surprised at how many do it.
Hey, it' s life.

Anonymous 53701

Turning yourself into a whore inflicts demonstrable harm on everyone who cares about you, whether they're aware of the details or not.

Anonymous 53702

Get lost.

Anonymous 53703

Loosen up.

Anonymous 53704

I think you're loose enough for both.

Anonymous 53705

You're not bringing anyone down with you.

Anonymous 53706

learn your lesson, start again

Anonymous 53707

Whether or not she tells him, the right thing is to break up so he date a decent person.

Anonymous 53708

tell him you wan't to have a threesome with a big titty goth hooker

Anonymous 53709

Theoretically,not that I am encouraging it, but suicide is the best way to truly atone for that tier of betrayal. Anything less is vapid and not genuine regret.

Anonymous 53710


Anonymous 53711

The only way to atone is to break up with him, then give him a lot of money anonymously (you could periodically throw wadded up balls of cash through his window, but try to be more subtle if possible). Anything else would just be self-serving to appease yourself.

Anonymous 53712


imo any girl who cheats is a retard desu, which if its u, u r a retard desuuu. you crave sex. your bf may be attractive but your too deep in hookup culture. be honest and if he wants to break up dont be crawling back. but fyi since you cheated on him hes more likely to cheat on someone else and ruin their experience, and you have very little chance to have healthy relationships without this happening desu, let alone marriage

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