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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Online communtities Anonymous 93

Does anyone feel like they can't fit in online communities? I'm thinking of regulating myself to a permanent lurker because every time I join an online community I can't get along with anyone. What's the point?

Anonymous 97

I kinda feel you. I tried joining discord channels and small forums. And I even manage to write some short introduction about me, but as soon as the other people talk I don't want to annoy or interrupt. And I lurk mostly until I feel too awkward to start talking now, weeks later and just leave the channel or forum again. Also how am I supposed to start social media if I don't have any friends there. I tried setting up a twitter, and realized that no one cares or ever will.

Life is pain.

Anonymous 99

I don't do well in groups of people and have a fear of being ignored in a chat or voice group call. There's always that one person who manages to steal the spotlight, say the right thing, or make everyone laugh and I can't help but compare myself to them, as sad as that sounds. I believe I'm an acquired taste in personality so I can't socially connect as well with people like others can.

Anonymous 100


o lordy, same here anons. I tried forums, chats and discord type things but always feel intimidated as fuck and end up getting overlooked when I try to talk, words to the wind. doesn't help that almost all communities you go to, there's established groups and personalities already.

>I believe I'm an acquired taste in personality

spot on way to put it

Anonymous 106

I think the problem is joining in where there's already established friendships and it's extremely awkward to jump in on that. I feel needy wanting to make a name for myself online and even then, I get paranoid when that happens and then disappear.

I wonder if there will be a Discord chat here?

Anonymous 110

This is why I browse imageboards.

Already is one. Pretty sure it was posted over in the lolcow.farm/g/ thread about this site.

Anonymous 112

Most of you guys just have social anxiety to work around. Nothing wrong about that.

My problem is that most people just plain don't like my personality.
I'm fully aware of all my negative and positive traits. I'm aware that I'm a natural shit-talker with a VERY rough on the edges personality and I'm quite critical (of myself and others) to a default to an almost sanctimonious degree. I am very opinionated and I have a very intense degree of almost anything I do and say.

My positive traits are that I am very loyal to friends and I tend to be open-minded about people's frustrations, emotional issues, and beliefs. I also have a really strong conscience .. to put it simply, I'm a bit of a teddybear on the inside.

I have without a doubt, problems with people in real life because of the first set of traits but the way it interacts with people on online communities and imageboards is ridiculous. A lot of them get far more offended by what I say than I'd like and take my words the wrong way. I just learned to walk away from it at this point. I'm aware it's my problem and my personality conflicts the most with these groups of people compared to any other groups of people I known.

Honestly normies and people who aren't around these parts of the internet seem to like me better sadly.

Anonymous 113

irl I don't have many issues with people, or at least don't have them vocalizing their distaste for me if they don't like me (when this has happened, it's generally been strangers oddly enough). Honestly, people seem to really like me, and I like most people as well.

Online, people tend to get offended if I mention luxury experiences or items I own. I don't come from a wealthy family (lower middle class), but have been extremely fortunate to have been given the opportunities/items of the wealthy. Purseforum is the only place I've found others who don't get offended, generally because a lot of them have shared experiences.

I like imageboards because there are more weebs into fashion than most places. Also I like that if someone gets offended I can just ignore them.

Anonymous 115

FUCKING HELP, did I fall asleep and write these? And >>106, yeah, that's exactly it; feeling like an outsider.

>A discord link! I want to make friends, we can play vidya! m-maybe next month…

Anonymous 124

Yep, I suck at interacting with groups in general. I get told just to put myself out there but when I do people don't like me and I'm better off being quiet and in the corner.

I know it's more to do with me than them though.

Anonymous 129

I fared better irl than in the handful of discord groups I've tried and that's saying something.

Anonymous 2765

I been too scared to join discord groups because I feel like joining abruptly is so awkward plus I do not know how to introduce myself and I wanna get over that fear so badly

Anonymous 2863


Every online community I end up joining eventually becomes too sjw or edgy4me so I usually end up having to leave. I'd love to find a place where I can partake in laughs and not be reminded of my subhuman status constantly. Having to kowtow to callout culture madness is annoying, too. It's like everyone's an extremist these days and there's no balance, subtlety, or nuance in anything anymore.

Anonymous 2865

I am frequently accused of being a male online.

I participate in wizchan and have never been called out for being female, though I've seen others accused (probably the opposite issue of me kek).

I'm considering becoming a full-time internet lurker myself though.

Anonymous 2873

I dunno, in places like this, I always feel like everyone else posts are all super-smooth and witty and I'm just here like…

>…wow I never knew I was so boring.

I feel better here than most places though, it's just so…casual, idk.

Anonymous 2915

I feel the same way. I am so boring and afraid to type sometimes. Everyone seems to want excitement it kind of sucks. I just like being the presence of people sometimes but people are so chatty.

Anonymous 2919

Me too, I joined some discord a while ago and people posted there all day long and it quickly became a popularity contest. That's not comfy at all.

On a side note, how the fuck do people participate in imageboard communities somewhat personally? I've browsed 4ch and others since 2008 and seen it happen so many times and still have no clue how this happens. Seems like some people know each other, talk and have friendships among themselves and I'm just… "how?"
Isn't everyone anon? Do they exchange emails? Where? When? How? It boggles my mind

Anonymous 2935

Me too! People were conversing so much I didn't really know when to enter and when I did it felt really awkward. I wish I had self esteem.

They definitely have a group somewhere. On r9k they 100% had groups on Skype, discord and whatnot. Most tripfags are in at least one of those groups. Cgl has people add each other, one of the girls I know is super nice and chatty but she does it one on one so I don't have to compete with other people, it's nice!

Anonymous 2943

Sometimes when you spend enough time in a board you just start to recognize people. I used to be way into 4ch /int/ back when I was really really lonely, so I started recognizing some of the guys there. Some of the more social boards seem to have a degree of selfposting though, which made it easier. Like /int/ had the muh heritage threads and you just got to know people that way. I wouldn't say I made friends with any one though, except one guy I added on snapchat from the culturepal threads. I opened one of his snaps in class and it was a dick pic and haven't talked to him since lol.

My problem, I think, is I'm too casual to be apart of online communities. I'm totally fine with just lurking sometimes and commenting when I want to, which is usually not that much. People don't start recognizing others unless they are constantly active in chat or whatever, so I'm not really part of the community even if I am.

Anonymous 2953

Too many fucking extroverted libcucks for me, screaming about how whites are rednecks and all that shit. I not alt right or anything, but they seem cultish.

Anonymous 2954

Samefag. But oh god this.

Anonymous 2967

I haven't been in an online community since 2009 and even then it stopped being innocent '00 era. Lots of people have started to turn sjw and take things too seriously.

I have a feeling most of the people in online communities these days are being asses to each other to hide their lack of actual humor and wit. Either that, or they turn it completely sjw on unrelated things and act like everyone else is even interested in their American-centrist issues.

I miss the old days. People in the forums were friendly, normal and successful. I have made friends that have stuck with me for 10+ years.
I cant't even peek into an online community anymore because the majority of the time I have to flee from the sewer of human existence. Social rejects, people with legit Asperger's, astigmatism, narcissistic personality disorder, anger issues etc lurk in the dark corners of discrods.

Anonymous 2972

Since we're all more or less on the same page here, we'd make a great online community. Shit my dudes, I just want a cozy place on the internet.

Anonymous 2975


Agreed, this place is so nice and for the first time I feel more comfortable.

Anonymous 3067

This so much. It's intensely disappointing.

Anonymous 3132

I pretty much only post on anonymous image boards. I get too anxious about talking to people or them getting to know me. The loneliness is really getting to me lately though. We're all gonna make it I hope.

Anonymous 3155

I wonder if I'm the only one that also feels like an outside on image boards. Even on a small one like this I feel like my posts don't get replied to that often so it's more like I'm talking at people than having a conversation. I see other people who have actual conversations in threads and that seems like a more meaningful interaction, but maybe I'm wrong and it's more of the same because at the end of the day we're all anonymous so those conversations don't automatically lead to more conversations or friendships.

Anonymous 3156

Hey anon. Maybe try to interact more with people and respond to their posts instead of waiting to see if someone will reply to yours first. I used to feel the same way before. I don't have any friendships that started directly from imageboards though.

Anonymous 3166

I do, but even with that it seems like I have a low response rate. I don't mean to be rude, but I feel like I just have the super power to end conversations unintentionally. I'm looking at a few threads now that I was excited were posted, but died after a few posts with my response being the last.

Anonymous 3167

Sorry but that made me lol. No, I don't think that is rude.
Maybe you can try to revive them, sometimes i like to see nice threads I had forgotten about being bumped back to the front page.
It's hard to know what to say if idk what type of dialogue you usually have with people. Good luck, anon.

Anonymous 3176

Anon, I really want to apologize to you.
I'm not the person you were replying to here, but I've been browsing the board in general for a few months and there were a few posts and threads that I replied to, not thinking I'd get a reply (because I never do, I'm a conversation killer too). But then someone started actually replying to me, and I got really social phobic and didn't reply. I literally ran away from my computer and had to go sit on my bed and try to breathe deeply and all some of the times.

I tried to tell myself that everyone here is popular and happy and chatting on a discord/chat/etc somewhere and no one would miss me not replying, and that me running away was fine. Then I started to think, but I've dropped like three threads now, what if people feel bad because of it, because no one is replying? But I told myself that it was fine, that I'd probably mess up and say something stupid, and they would hate me anyway, so it's better that I don't say anything at all, and besides, everyone else is probably happy and popular and they won't miss me AT ALL, and everything's great.

But then, just the other day, I was lying in bed and it occurred to me: WHAT IF THOSE PEOPLE I HADN'T REPLIED TO WERE ALL THE SAME PERSON?!! That one person would feel so very, very horrible.

I'm really, really very sorry Anon, for not replying, because I'm worried that same one person is you. Please don't think it was you, because it was just because of me running away. I'm just not used to talking to people, especially other females, and I'll try to keep up replying to some of the threads I ran from, so the conversation doesn't die.

I'm sorry for everything, Anon. Please feel better! <3

Anonymous 3179

I've asked people who were supposedly interested in meeting up to contact me(they were whining about having no one to meet)…but of course they didn't. How annoying, why do they whine about it when they don't even put effort?

Anonymous 3181

I'll try that. I was a little worried about double posting too much (especially since people complained about Spoony posting too much at the start) but your encouragement reminds me it's not that big of a deal. Thank you anon.

Oh anon, I think that's unlikely, but it's sweet that you're worried anyways. I know there was no bad intent on the part of the people who stopped replying, and I can relate to freaking out about social things, even if its' on the internet. I guess we can all just do better to reply and keep up the comfy community vibes we have here since that seems to be something we're all seeking.

Anonymous 3258

Holy shit anon you are adorable

Anonymous 3259

have you considered developing emotionally past the level of a five year old?

Anonymous 3260

Cunt, don't be a condescending prick.

Anonymous 3265

Have you ever considered not being a human trash?

Anonymous 3276

I thought about making another thread, but I suppose what I want so say is relevant enough for this one, but can I just take a moment to talk about the abysmal state of fandom right now? I've pretty much left any and all fandoms and have been out for 2-3 years because I just don't find it pleasant anymore. It feels like there was a downward spiral after the shift from LJ/Myspace to Tumblr/Twitter and it's not getting better. Hardly anyone writes fanfic any more, everything has a socjus tint to the point we can't even have shipwars anymore, now it's ~your pairing is problematic~, not to mention the ugly SU art fetish.

It's sad because fandom was such a big part of my life for a long time and I would like that back, but it's gone. Recently I've been enjoying a podcast series, and I decided to check out their official tumblr and boy was that a huge mistake. Not only was almost every fanart the ugly+fat+black combo, but one of the first things I saw was an apology by the creators as to why they, three white cis males, made their main podcast characters white cis males after the fandom had fit. It not only killed any interest in exploring the fandom further, it has affected my enjoyment of the podcast itself.

Anonymous 3277

unnamed (16).gif

Here's the next thing fandom will turn into shit. If it's not happening already.

Anonymous 3279

Fanfics are still written they've just…gotten worse I guess??? I used to read fanfictions a lot when I was in middle and high school and still do and a lot of it has become the tumblr gender identity stuff for some fandoms. I used to be into fandoms but now I just avoid them when it comes to any type of social media because there's always some type of shitstorm that will erupt. Now I just enjoy stuff with a select group of friends and browse fanfics but never interact with the communities anymore.

I know how you feel though anon. Fandoms used to be my favorite type of online communities because I had people who shared my interests but not anymore. I especially loved the smaller, tightly knit ones where everyone knew each other. Some are still fairly chill since the worst of the worst haven't gotten a hold of them yet but who knows how long that will last.

Anonymous 3281


I'm sure it's already started, especially since Cuphead is already racist for not prostrating before the socjus alter


This is fair, Ao3 still gets decent traffic, but I still feel like there's a disconnect Ao3 and The Rest of Fandom, when it use to be fanfic was a cornerstone of fandom. Plus the quality/content has gotten worse, as you mentioned.

I'm glad you still have a few safe havens, and I do hope they manage to stay sane.

Anonymous 3294

Same anon, same. I used to read fanfics on kink memes, LJ, ff.net and AO3, look for fanarts on Japanese fanartists' homepages and pixiv, and I don't think I ever found spoilers and social justice bullshit online by accident. Since I made a tumblr I see people taking their dumb hobbies too seriously and think they're activists for speaking over actual minorities on real issues and on whether their favorite webcomic is aphobic or not.

I still try to read fanfics sometimes on AO3 and while there's the usual badly written omegaverse and boring AU fics, there are more and more fanfics tagged "trans character" that usually refers to characters who aren't trans, and the authors pretend it's not fetish fanfics at all. Fanarts are now more popular than fanfics, or at least more produced, and now mediocre artists spam everyone's feeds with their ugly garbage and get really popular that way for some reason.

Anyway, I made a private twitter to follow Japanese fanartists and official accounts, made some former mutuals unfollow me by posting some common sense which pissed them off, and only really talks about fandom stuff to my rl friends because we're all more or less into the same manga, video games and series anyway. It's way more relaxing that way. Sometimes I see people who seem pretty cool and fun to talk to online but I wait and see what the post before just in case and they almost all get obnoxious at some point. I managed to get a mutual who seemed ok at first and started shit talking me behind my back because I liked a character she didn't like because said character was problematic. I noticed later that she was underage, if I knew I wouldn't have even bothered with her.

Anonymous 3300

As much as I hate the trans/POC/fat/etc headcanons people ruin characters with, that's still a minority of fic. SJWs have actually significantly improved it by frowning on garbage cliches like romanticized rape, seme/uke dynamics and all that shit that comes with teenage girls attempting to write gay men. Even trivial things like sex without lube has become more rare even though it used to be common, people seem to be more educated on sex in general.

As for writing quality, I tend to enjoy modern fic a lot more. Not sure if this makes sense but to me, old fic felt like poor imitations of novels and current fic feels like imitations of other fic. I guess that sounds like a downgrade, but I find a decent writer can refine simple fic tropes much better than they can put together a coherent, engaging, plot heavy story.

Anonymous 3304

I guess it depends on where and what type of fandom you enjoy. If it's something like the SU fandom then they're everywhere or they spew so much bullshit it feels like they are. I like smaller fandoms because they're less likely to have sjws or batshit insane fans. If I'm into something insanely popular I just kind of don't interact at all. I think SJWs gravitate towards more popular stuff because they're shit will reach more audiences and it's just overall a race of who can be the most popular.

I prefer a mix of both older and newer fanfics. I've found ones as old as 2006/2005 that are still my treasures to this day and new ones that I love as well. There's always gonna be shitpiles upon shitpiles of bad and of course we have terrible fandoms wherer writing(or art) is notoriously bad and while that does ruin it somewhat, there are the ones that are so bad they're good. Naruto fanfics have a treasure trove of poorly written, yet hilarious stuff that I can't bring myself to hate it.

But yeah I get what you're saying anon. I've seen a huge drop in low quality porn fics. I still see lemon which is quite shit to this day(it's also not my type of fanfiction either so maybe I'm biased) but it's gottena bit better. I find the best fanfiction is written by adults vs. teenage girls.

Art being more popular makes me a bit sad. I can admire some of the art because there are some talented people but it feels like anyone with an art tablet thinks they can draw now. I mean it was the same with fanficiton in that anyone with a keyboard could write one but it just feels so much more satisfying, especially when it's the so bad it's good stuff.

Anonymous 3309

>romanticized rape, seme/uke dynamics and all that shit

>tfw you still like this

>the best fanfiction is written by adults

yeah, it's why i think if you want to find good fics, you need to seek out fandoms that generally skew older. literary fandoms, especially for niche books, have some surprisingly decent work

Anonymous 4953

You also seem like a know it all. Stop trying to put everyone in a box. I do the same thing. It only drives people away. Just go with the flow. If you find out clues keep them to yourself.

Anonymous 4956

I don't do that openly lol that gay

Anonymous 4959

i'm so ineloquent, that's what fucks me up.

it's so hard to type out anything to a person without worrying about them thinking i'm dumb or whatever.

doesn't help that i have a habit of repeating words. or starting most of my sentences with 'i'.

Anonymous 4964

I don't know why I do this but sometimes I can go days speaking with someone over the Internet about opinion stuff but later on I just run out of steam and disappear for about 2 weeks and then come back with stuff to talk about.
I do want stuff like friends to go out with as well as friendly affection but sometimes I just get this urge to cut any budding friendships and go back to my own solitary self.
I don't know what lifestyle I would prefer, perhaps something in-between.

Anonymous 5907

on lolcow, i recently tried to create a snow thread the rude ass moderators deemed it a shit thread.

i mean, it is my fault to an extent that im on other gossip boards (celeb, non e-"celeb" related) and posting some quick information and then having it snowball by user engagement is common and the best way to get things going, instead of obsessively searching every detail to spoonfeed a retard but eh.

the only site with a bunch of autists i can handle is this and 4chan (sometimes). why do i bother

Anonymous 5908

Because being an annoying sjw/hating white people etc isn't really milk. Half of tumblr/blm is like this.

And half of the threads in snow are shit anyway, don't take it personally

Anonymous 5909


Anonymous 5916


Yes. I'm usually very abrasive and forceful, and I talk a lot without thinking (too much time internally monologuing alone, you forget how to sensor out stupid thoughts because it all flows freely in your head).

But every once in awhile I'll meet people for a brief period who I get along with. It makes me ecstatic because communicating on an actual human level feels so good, and I realize other people aren't as terrible as I make them out to be, nor am I as terrible as I make myself out to be, and then I get into this sort of mania where I can't shut the fuck up, and everything begins to decompile so what I say stops making sense, and I attention whore too much, and then I realize the interactions are different in my head than they are irl, and I have no choice but to ghost out of shame.

Anonymous 5930

Oh, yeah. I keep getting in pointless arguements and then ragequitting certain imageboards.
I haven't really felt a sense of belonging since fucking off from Krautchan, but they've changed too much for me to put up with the usual /pol/ and /r/incels bullshit that just keeps getting worse. The people I liked to talk with 10 years ago are mostly gone.
I have communities that I enjoy, present company included :), but it just doesn't feel the same, no matter where I go. There's nothing quite like your first, whether in sex or shitposting.
I'm a little scared, chans were my substitute for friends and that was not by choice.

Anonymous 5934

Same. I just quit a forum I've been on since 2012 since I kept arguing with everyone and disagreeing on every-fucking-thing. I only stayed because of a shitty group I made that was still active. It was like being chained to a prison cage.

People are so much more fucking annoying on the internet these days. I don't know if it has to do with the sheer amount of volume of users being more active or just me getting old I don't know.

Social media is surprisingly, actually the worst. People want to virtue signal and play SJW far too much for me to enjoy it. I'm sick of the internet giving idiots a chance to speak so much bullshit. It was all fun and games until it started affecting real life.

I miss 2005-2010 tbh. It was the best years on the internet for me. It was "comfy".

Maybe I'm just old and bitter but I increasingly can't stand anyone and I'm tired of the rabid angry opinions.

Anonymous 6118

Why don't you fit anywhere?

Anonymous 6120

Have you tried the Crystal cafe discord? Everybody is pretty chill there

Anonymous 6122

Not her but how is the crystal cafe discord? I've never really used discord despite having an account and I would like to know what you guys are talking about there.

Anonymous 6123


Me too :( And typing in english for most of the time doesn't help either since it's my second language.
What do, lads?

Anonymous 6158


I was a member of a discord for nearly a year.
All of them, besides myself, grew very close, but since we constantly fought (mainly because i couldn't stand how much of SJWs they are) i told them off and left.
Afterwards i created a another account to see whether they're talking behind my back. We talked, then a fight started again and i left, because i'm fed up. So even when i tried to change up my writing a bit, they still didn't like me.

I barely have any of my old high school friends left and didn't make a single one in uni so far (i'm already in my 3rd year), but i really want, no i need to change that.
If i can't even get along chatting with stranger on the internet, how could anybody ike me in real life?
I must be doing something terribly wrong, but i have no idea what…

Anonymous 6182

What did yall fight about even?

Anonymous 6183

Something related to the fandom this chat was about; e.g. somebody says that as a true fan you should like all their music, but i disagree with that etc.

Anonymous 6214

I mostly stay lurking around certain forums, but I noticed some of them have member's only access so it gets even harder to look into resources exclusive to forums. As for textboards/imageboards are better due to anonymity and able to be neutral in certain boards.

I mostly avoid any form of voice communication due to severe social anxiety, especially when playing multiplayer due to hostile nature of men towards women who speak in vc. Then get either kicked to even banned because 'I wasn't communicating with the team'. I don't mind banter, but when it starts escalating to your pms with thousands of 'Give me your number, emails etc.' and 'Send nudes please' nonstop for months while they block evading it becomes ridiculous. Even when I screencap and record evidence and explain to them 'I'm flattered, but not interested' while showing the evidence, they either ignore the evidence or go full turboautist and shouting death threats. I now stick with singleplayer or Warframe only, but would be nice to play any Warhammer or Warhammer 4k games.

It doesn't end there. This even happens when studying online at my university, particularly when doing group work knowing full well that anyone can record your voice and use your face in some random imageboard request thread. I never liked how universities utilize Discord so you have to get your assignments there instead of their Canvas platform.

Anonymous 6384


>mainly because i couldn't stand how much of SJWs they are

Yeah anon I can't imagine what maybe made them dislike you.

Anonymous 6404


you're probably a sjw

Anonymous 6419

Sjws are insufferable. Gb2 PULL and please find some reason and balance in your beliefs. At least some of the alt-right retards can present real, historical facts.

Anonymous 6430

How is tumblr these days? In terms of fandoms, drama and SJWs. I might remake a blog because twitter is boring and I felt talking to other people on tumblr back in the early 2010s was easier and it was comfy. I kind of miss it before fandoms and SJWs lost it and my former mutuals decided that everything was problematic. Though I might just follow artists' blogs and travel blog if there are interesting ones.

Anonymous 6446


I've hung out on 4chan since I was underage babby, and I joined a lot of Skype groups/Discord servers.
Eventually, I grew up and got sick of all the racist, women-hating edgelords. I'm a black girl, so it's not exactly enjoyable to be around people who endlessly bitch about how everyone who looks like me must be evil and subhuman. Oscillating between being "the exception" and the target of some /pol/ idiot's vitriol got old after I turned 18 and grew pangs of self-respect, to be honest. /cgl/ is okay sometimes, though.
I still have a small subset of friends from a 4chan Skype group that migrated to Discord, and I occasionally hang out on this one normie forum, but aside from that (and here, CC!), it's kind of hard to find a place where I fit in and feel comfortable. Having anxiety and being an overall quiet, skittish person until I really get to know a person doesn't help, either.

Anonymous 6447

Im more worried about not fitting in irl. People are a lot more vitriolic online and sorta territorial so it's hard to join new communities. Really we should focus on the real world though, but it's a lot scarier.

Anonymous 6456


I feel you, a lot of people usually make friends for the purpose of entertainment and that's perfectly fine I suppose. Sometimes, I wish I could makes friends that were okay with silence or boredom. It was a struggle trying to make friends in high school, and even college, because it seemed like everyone was so adamant about being funny and entertaining. Such is the life for boring people.

Anonymous 6464

Still shitty, it hasn't changed a bit. If anything it has gotten worse. Unless you interact with few people or don't interact at all and just follow very specific tags, it's probably wiser not to bother with it.

Anonymous 6469

Oh, this sucks but at the same time I'm not that surprised. People from tumblr decided to shit up twitter with their fandom dramas and calling everything problematic (while not caring about actual discrimination and bigotry btw, of course) while complaining about tumblr doing the same so I thought many of them left tumblr but I guess not. I think the "hipster"/normie side of tumblr isn't that big anymore? I remember seeing people from fandoms joking about hipsters (pretty much anyone who wasn't in fandoms according to them) on tumblr a lot but I never hear about them these days.

Fitting in an online community is very different from fitting in social groups/activities irl, just from the fact that online you can hide your real identity and it's easier to communicate with people from all over th world, at least in theory, and if you dislike a community you can leave and try to find a new one. But irl you kind of have to force yourself to fit in.

Anonymous 6483

Petty but I wish lolcow gave a shit about my favorite irrelevant e-celeb, Amberlynn reid. I don't care about cows anymore and I haven't in about a year or so, but her.

So I lurk kf to know what people are saying and to find out about things I otherwise wouldn't since I don't have Instagram and Snapchat. I'd really like to say stuff sometimes, but I don't like the fact they have usernames attached to their posts and that they seem to doxx each other sometimes. Maybe this is a blessing so I won't get addicted to e-celeb bashing again. All I know for sure is that I'll never post. I wonder why lc doesn't care about her, but why she's so massive on kf. (sorry I had to)

I love giving my unwanted opinion on things, but the idea of having a username and people following everything I say for any reason whatsoever puts me off. The only communities I'm really a part of are this one and an ED group I visit every week or so for mental support by seeing other people are struggling too and that I am not crazy, but never post because username yadda yadda.

Saged because this post is a mess, whew.

Anonymous 6487

i am also a black girl who's been online since i was an underage retard. it's not an easy experience

Anonymous 6490

Correct me if I'm wrong but there is a thread about her I think. At least I've seen her name on lolcow before, but I think her thread is old and I wouldn't recommend necroing it.

I also lurk kf from time to time and there's no way I'd create an account, not because of the accounts and names, but because it seems like everyone wants to shit on other users and dox them. Being an anon is comfier anyway. I mean, since people use names and almost never change their avatar it's easy to track who says what and learn more about them even though I don't particularly care about kf users.

Anonymous 6498

yeah, many of them seem to have been doxed. that is another reason why i wouldn't create an account there either.

lolcow has 2 or 3 threads on her but they have been dead for a long time. even during the milkiest era she had no one there paid much attention to her. no idea why, she is pretty shocking/entertaining.

Anonymous 6530

i get that sense from lolcow too. when they doxxed mystery it didn't sit right with me.
but beware, the power of the digital footprint is serious and very underestimated. it's why i only post my opinions and thoughts on anonymous accounts.

Anonymous 6540

People on lolcow seem to want to shit on each other too but not as much I think. Maybe I get that impression because I almost only go to /ot/ and /g/ these days but when there's infighting it's because anons just can't ignore bait, misunderstand a post and thus derail entire threads and accuse each other of being men or of humble bragging. On KF it seems they just feel like they think it's funny being assholes in general, and it's easier to track who says what so doxing seem easier. And you just reminded me about mystery and how I was confused about what was going on at the time because I wasn't following the threads where she was the most present. That was weird. I also only state my opinions on anon, but it's not like I had many followers or things to say on social media so I should be fine.

Anonymous 6557

I hate the collision of chan generals and discord. It's no fun when people use the site with a pre-established bias towards posters. Ugh.

Anonymous 6559

Whatchu talkin' about Willis? CC is completely anonymous, so we cannot see who from the discord posts here or which ones are their posts.

Anonymous 6564

Our discord was a mistake. People there are nice but the chan is more dead than ever now.

Anonymous 6598


I wasn't talking about CC. A gen over at 4fun I like has about 4 discords and it's obvious to see their bias towards their discord buddies when posting there.

The 'cord is dead. CC is filled with stressed college gals that are probably prepping for finals. Like I should be.

Anonymous 6602

The discord is really active in the "verified chats".

Anonymous 6611

Chat has picked up a bit, people getting to know others in the server now so they talk more.

Anonymous 6612

I meant the chan, not the discord. the discord is pretty active

Anonymous 6663


I always feel like i don't fit in any kind of online place. Every community seems to always be more passionate for communities and hobbies, be too edgy, be too pc, be too catty, etc. I tried most social websites and none have ever clicked for me.

Doesn't help that i'm basically socially retarded and have SA so even if i fit in i always fuck it up one way or another, seem to overeager and creep people out etc. I also always think that i am "annoying" people so i just stop talking which kills my chances even more.

LC was where i first kinda felt like i "fit" in, but then it turned to ass real quick so CC is the only community i feel comfortable in and like i "fit in".
I especially feel really comfortable in the discord since everyone there is lovely and i love talking to them, but i can't help but feel that i am annoying them every time i talk, and i can already see myself fucking it up.

Verified chat is almost always 24/7 active. The non-verified out is dying because everyone feels more comfortable knowing 100% there are no robots and we are talking to actual women.

Anonymous 6671

they should get it done, talk to the mods and get verified already, it will be better for everyone.

I really like the discord too.
I feel like I'm part of kiwifarms cause I spend a lot of time there, but I'm just a lurker.

Anonymous 6680

I also love the discord chat everyone is really nice! You don't have to worry about being annoying, I don't think anyone is annoying in the discord. I like how active the discord is.

Anonymous 6714

Yes, hopefully everyone can get verified soon so there's no split in chats.
I'm sure mods are doing their best since a lot of people joined before verification became needed so there's a lot of unverified people hanging out.

Ahh, well, thank you! I like, how active it is too.
My problem is that i can't shake that feeling even when people explicitly tell me i'm not annoying, i just think everyone thinks "this bitch" every time i type in any kind of chat, including the discord, no matter how unlikely it is.
I'm just a pretty paranoid person who let's her SA get the best of her kek.

Anonymous 12463

If you're into weebshit, 4chan's weeb boards are pretty decent. /a/ can get swarmed with retarded crossboarders sometimes but /m/ and /jp/ are pretty chill if you don't mind some elitism.

Anonymous 12464

You won't get doxed on kf unless you're a lolcow yourself.

Anonymous 12468

They dox random people.

Anonymous 12470

They even dox there own members.
I also heard that kf admin is a huge creep, does anyone have more info of that?

Anonymous 12472

I've never seen them dox members that didn't deserve it. Just don't be a lolcow.

Anonymous 12486


Online communities exist to gather info on people. They are portrayed as a cozy home within a second home.
If they weren't then none would use them.
If it wasn't like this then none would create online communities.
The feeling that you don't fit in probably means that the communities think they have regurgitated you enough.

Anonymous 12487


I ended up in a discord group one time playing overwatch when the group i was in insisted i joined it. Most of them are nice and fun to talk to, except this one guy who is always on and always trying to psychoanalyse me and come up with wild accusations about my character, even smugly remarking about my slowness to answer him despite being an amatuer writer. Another time he was being incredibly demanding and probing, and then just said "he was seeing how i'd react to being treated abusively".
feels bad man, i'm a shut-in with little experience with talking to people online, so that kind of talk really digs into me over time. some of the things he said, like "why are you anxious all the time? don't you know you're going to die one day?" have been spinning around in my head for some time.
I really have trouble trying to get along with people like that, and it hurts that i've been avoiding that group for the last few months because i had a lot of fun at the start. Maybe I am just a whiny slug.

Anonymous 12488

What do people need to do to "deserve" being doxed?

Anonymous 12490

Nah, he's an edgy asshole with a big ego. Best off finding another group.

Anonymous 12491

Okay, anon-chan. I'll try to find some other groups then. Thank you for replying to me!

Anonymous 12492

that’s disgusting get out of there ASAP and/or block the guy
you’re always welcome to join the cc discord when it opens again!

Anonymous 12496

I will, and I'll join the CC discord when I can.
I tried before, but I missed the calls and felt quite embarrassed about it. I'll wait patiently this time for the call.
It's nice to be around such kind anons.

Anonymous 12552

Try looking more at yourself instead of him. How come you are so affected with his kindergarten grade bullying?
Do you often guilt-trip during fun pastimes like hanging out with people and playing OW?
Do you lack a bullshit filter (trying to understand and come to an agreement with assholes instead of just rooting them out as assholes)?

Anonymous 12556

Anyone hate having a username? I've only posted on imageboards and have never used forums that much. Sometimes I feel left out because I don't join discords but the thought of me saying something stupid and it sticking to me gives me anxiety.

Anonymous 12557

I hate it too and I've only joined the discord because I needed friends.

Anonymous 12734

Yeah, also I'm actually "weird" and I overshare everything, so I usually get removed.
It kind of sucks to be subhuman, but the needs of the many is not a Funny Joke.

I don't trust myself with irl friends or online friends anymore, since being removed means I'm the problem.

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