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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Vent Thread Anonymous 115513

Previous thread >>112803

Anonymous 115514

there's nothing wrong with having a deep love for one's country and people.

Anonymous 115515

I hate America

Anonymous 115517

>>115513
Another friend group I have to leave because one of them tuned out to be a rapist and everyone else took his side. Why did I ever think I could get along with men?

Anonymous 115523

IMG_6177.jpeg

god I wish stanning a celebrity were classified as a mental illness and actually had support groups but there is no AA or 12 step meeting, all the refugees do is reconvene on snark subs where their stanning turns inward into hatred, worsening the problem (been there done that) or somehow manage to get over it without real help and get bored?

and then there's me

Anonymous 115529

i dunno why i feel compelled to say this but i feel like engagement in STEM as a community, particularly mathematics, is important for longevity

Anonymous 115531

also i wish cc had a /sci/ or math related board

Anonymous 115539

>>115531
there are threads but theyve been burried by shitposting atm

Anonymous 115540

>>115529
>longevity
How?

Anonymous 115544

Basically reposting this from another threat because I couldnt find the latest vent threat, I guess Im looking for someone to relate to this and tell me what to do, im so tired of this

Why do guys online straight up bully you and think it's flirtatious or something?
This has happened to me couple of times, I know it's supposed to be flirtatious (or is in their heads) because then they will spam you with cute cat memes that says "us?"…
Yeah I understand banter between friends but from some dude I barely know?
Which one do you want, a friend who you can make shitty jokes with or a girlfriend? Because I cant be both to you.
I don't get what am I exactly supposed to find attractive in that sort of behaviour, especially when they seem to be unable to have an actual conversation?
You can't just skip the getting to know someone part and expect me to be cool with it.
Worst part is that when you're lonely, for a second you get happy because you think someone wants to talk to you but no, it's just some random ass guy messaging you because you happen to be woman.

Like some Usamoid sent me dm, I don't follow him nor does he me, then started acting like this, why? Don't they think about how they come across at all? Im almost jealous of this level of self esteem they seem to have

Anonymous 115545

>>115544
They call it "negging"

Anonymous 115547

>>115545
Googled it and had my little 'I dont want to be here' moment, Im not surprised that this was a thing though. For a while I thought maybe I should try pursuing relationships with men since it seems easy but Im coming to the conclusion that it is not worth it, shit just makes me feel more depressed

Anonymous 115555

07777.jpg

Moids hath no Soul
Everytime a moid seems to have the capacity to understand/ consider others it proves itself wrong! Yes this is my fault for both expecting things of such creatures and allowing moids I'm not dating to influence any of my thoughts or feelings but IDGAF! I was speaking to a moid for a year pretty much we were very similar and compatible and it decided to, around le year mark, have sex with another woman (he was a virgin) whilst acting the exact same towards me! I have been speaking to another moid for over half a year and felt even more compatible and awesome and then it decides to start ignoring me out of literally nowhere!

Why bother talking to me every day if you are biologically inclined to act like a fucking tard out of the blue. It is not even the actions that upset me it is the inconsideration and lack of clarity seriously ! is it that hard to not be retarded? Just leave me alone if you are soo inclined and obliged to do stuff like this ughhghhgghgb dont waste my time faggots thgjdbjvnj

Sorry for scroteposting but I would rather speak of them into the void than allow them or a human who perceives me to know it can influence me

Anonymous 115559

>>115555 men are mentally deformed with limited emotional capacities and personalities. sorry you are experiencing it firsthand

Anonymous 115564

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i want a pet bunny

Anonymous 115577

Woman make terrible friends. I met this girl at work and she just uses me to talk about herself and Im kind of over it. I was talking about this really impactful thing or trying to and she just ignored me. To talk about some guy off of tinder who ghosted her.

Anonymous 115583

>>115559
Why you all love them then

Anonymous 115597

i hate people who need a narrative as to why they're good people. you see this in modern politics and why countries supposedly "need" to resort to military interventionism.

the best way to handle these types is to distance yourselves from them. people obsessed with portraying themselves as the good guy rarely are. you can only try to find those that genuinely try to do the right thing and support them, instead of letting supposed warmongering "good guys" influence you

Anonymous 115598

>>115597
also
the use of a narrative is often a tool in avoiding accountability and making space to continue doing aggressive behavior
as said, people should just distance themselves from these types.

Anonymous 115616

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nothing matters

Anonymous 115617

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I really hate myself guys. I hate my personality and I hate the way I look. I will never enjoy life because I hate myself.

Anonymous 115618

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Anonymous 115619

>takes nudes out of boredom
>I am incapable of being sexy
>my body is gross
>I look 16
>my existence is embarrassing

Anonymous 115621

Marriage sounds lovely and scary at the same time
What If you marry a guy who seemed sweet and innocent but then it was just an act?
What If he talks to other women behind your back? And much more.
Feeling sad rn

Anonymous 115622

IMG_0639.jpeg

some scientific advancement please allow us to reproduce without them so we can rid ourselves of this disease known as men

Anonymous 115623

>>115621
Really like the idea of being married and have a traditional relationship but then. I remember it is a rare occassion to find someone pure and with a kind soul. But no one is perfect.
What s think of marriage nowadays? And would marrying someone you met online would work out? Or you prefer it would be in person..?

Anonymous 115625

>>115623

lowk i noticed from looking at my own father that if u want a good man who listens to u he has to be autistic af and depressed

Anonymous 115626

>>115625
lmao that's so accurate to my experience too

love you dad (miss you)

Anonymous 115627

i miss my dad

it's been a long time since he died now. it doesn't really get easier, does it?

Anonymous 115634

IMG_5441.jpeg

i know this is gonna get me flamed on this site but i like both qt sexually dimorphic men and women. i think society creates pitfalls for itself when it starts believing only one gender is valuable

Anonymous 115636

>>115634
sexual dimorphism inevitably devalues / weakens, preys on one gender by making them weaker and incapable of defending themselves against intimdation and abuse. Its extremely psychological and nothing toxic manipulation EVEN if it is primarily driven by the subconcious. Its disgusting to the core because you cannot know whats going on behind closed doors in a ton of situations, and women's history tells it all. 25k years of having no rights, forced to have tons of babies, no way of having resources for yourself.

Anyone that trusts moids true intentions after all that is seriously damaged in the head.

Anonymous 115637

IMG_5445.jpeg

>>115636
but i like it

Anonymous 115638

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>>115636
and men being bigger than women doesnt have to be violent or predatory

Anonymous 115639

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humen natur

Anonymous 115642

>>115625
Where would you find a man like this though

Anonymous 115648

>>115638 it doesnt have to but it is and will always be, unfortunately.

Anonymous 115663

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I met someone yesterday and as per usual I feel like I'm falling love with them already Idk why I have to feel this way I wonder if I should just ghost them to save myself from heartache when things dont go the way I want it to I'm pretty sure I will ruin their life anyways I should just never have a relationship I think

Anonymous 115666

the only friend I have at uni (also my ex) is distancing from me. I am socially awkward so it is not possible for me get new ones and I am scared I will end up alone again like in high school…
the only reason I dated him in the first place was the fear of staying alone. unfortunately, he realized I never loved him and we broke up, but stayed friends
I am such a loser

Anonymous 115670

>>115663
>them
"Non-binary" people aren't worth jack, nona

Anonymous 115671

>>115670
what the fuck?

Anonymous 115676

>>115671
>I feel like I'm falling love with "them"
>I should just ghost "them"
>I will ruin "their" life
(they/them) "enbies" are scum.

Anonymous 115677

1000006985.jpeg

>>115676
thats just how I talk i didnt know that was a thing

Anonymous 115683

i like men who don’t warmonger or spread hatred to collectively war against others. i know people should be able to defend themselves in conflict but the use of propaganda in national security makes me feel weird.

Anonymous 115684

>>115683
just
men who always try to be nice even if recognizing the importance of their security

Anonymous 115689

>>115648
i dont think so.

Anonymous 115705

1000002708.jpeg

How come I always get a crush on someone the first time I meet them.

Anonymous 115706

I hate leftovers
No, I do not want to eat the remaining 1/3 of that delicious shrimp burrito from yesterday.
I swear I clean my fridge and even put baking soda inside to keep the odors away and yet I can taste the fridge in leftover food.

Anonymous 115707

>>115705
>>115663
I hate how much I can relate to you two.
Whenever someone is remotely nice to me my brain instantly goes "I bet he's madly in love with you" and I can't help myself from having a crush. Even when I KNOW it's someone I'm not compatible with it still happens.
I think it's because it happens so rarely and I have frankly no idea how to even get into a relationship lol. So every time there is the faintest prospect for one I start thinking that this is my one and only chance and I'll die alone if I don't take it.
And I'm obviously not at the point where I think I just shouldn't have a relationship, because I AM lonely and I DO want one
>>115670
>>115676
I'm ESL but I also often use "them" as a pronoun for words that are not gender neutral like "someone" or if the person's gender isn't relevant to the story I'm telling

Anonymous 115708

i have a weird feeling that men actually prefer women to be less autistic than them. and maybe women like men who are more autistic than them. at least in a long term relationship.

Anonymous 115710

>>115708
also
i know this is a bit taboo but i often question whether or not i even like the act of thinking and making observations as a women. a small part of me feels i do it out of a sense for distrust for men.
i like thinking about my feelings though. but sometimes people act really mean to you for talking about how you feel and it’s weird.

Anonymous 115711

>>115706
I've never heard about the baking soda thing. Does it work? I mean obv your food still tastes like fridge from your post, but generally speaking does it do anything? Can I just put it into a little box or smth and put it in there and it'll reduce the fridge smell?

Anonymous 115716

People I date (and that's few) will fall for me and I feel nothing for them. I've tried 2 weeks up to 3 months, I never feel anymore than "oh, that's nice I guess". I sincerely don't believe wasting any longer, like 6 months to a year with someone, would make any difference. it'd only eat up my waning youth. I'm already in my early 30s now.

Why can't I fall for somebody? Why don't I get to feel enamored and butterflies? better yet WHY CANT IT EVER BE MUTUAL? I feel so sick when I think about it. Might just adopt a cat and be fucking done with it. ik I sound bitter but it's the vent thread and it's my rules

I kept following "itll happen someday :)" advice and here I am, miserable with only a decent career to show for it.

I feel like the only way out is to completely change my life, move somewhere with lots of opportunity and people, idk. If anyone knows this feeling pls share if you don't mind

Anonymous 115718

>>115716
and reading this ik it sounds like oh woe is you people like you. But if theyre like mediocre, big whoop, someone really likes me, that doesn't change that I dont feel anything and just end up hurting them by leading them on. It happens every time I decide to "try" again. I just cause people pain. And its not like i'm hot or anything

Anonymous 115748

i think i am going insane also i dont really know what people want from me sometimes and i feel incredibly awkward for no reason why do people do this what are you expecting i dont know what people want from me but i feel very sorry i just dont know what people want from me this is a random imageboard on the internet where people sperg about how much they hate men

Anonymous 115749

>>115748
hey, it's okay. I have those anxious feelings too. I know how bad it sucks. Just please remember it isn't permanent. As bad as it feels in the moment it'll pass. And please trust me when I say that your mind is more judgmental than the world is on you. Most of the time if you do or say something wrong or awkward, people forget. but I know how much it fucking sucks. Sending you love nona.

Anonymous 115750

i really am sorry but i am not really a good person deep down. i don’t know how to react to certain things and i just feel very awkward for no reason. i don’t know how to stop or think around certain personalities. also there are just limitations to digital text that just feel very awkward. online personas are not real and i feel really ashamed when i think of certain things.

Anonymous 115751

>>115750
Why do you feel you're a bad person, nona? Not knowing how to react to certain situations or people doesn't make you bad. Being awkward in general doesn't either.

Anonymous 115752

>>115751
this is a bit strange but the way in which people communicate digitally is usually developed with geopolitical interests in mind so it feels unnatural to communicate certain things. not that i am some evil reptile person out to destroy the world but just that sometimes people act a certain way online because they dont really know how else to act it is the most unnatural thing in the world but one shouldnt really take it seriously and the weird amount of parallels i find in digital communication and my perceptions of events feels very weird and awkward and stupid and i really hope people dont take me seriously because i am just pixels on a screen manipulated by online troll groups i am not real
people should be happy in real life and not feel sad if certain things are not good in text because its not real its just a play

Anonymous 115753

>>115752
i mean people should be happy in general its a good thing
theres nuance that cant be captured in text but certain things are unnatural and i cannot communicate a certain way even if you held a gun to my head and i feel very bad and i hope everyone is happy and at peace in their head

Anonymous 115756

>>115752
but you're not just pixels on a screen. You're a person. And anxious or not I think the world is better with you in it

Anonymous 115757

>>115753

You don't have to if you don't want to. If you want to try though, I will be here to listen

Anonymous 115758

>>115757
i deleted everything

Anonymous 115760

1000007943.gif

I ghosted again. I will never be able to have a relationship with anyone.

Anonymous 115761

>>115760
Everytime i ever tried to have a relationship i broke it off because it was exhausting me. I never had a relationship for more than a few months. I am not asexual. All i know is i better never do that again because it damages people.

Anonymous 115767

i am addicted to the internet and i dont want to stop

Anonymous 115770

IMG_0074.gif

>bear approaches

Anonymous 115771

>>115767
Me, too. I've accepted I'll never make other meaningful friendships irl.

Anonymous 115774

My inability to lose weight has heavily impacted my life. I’ll go through spurts where I’ll exercise and then stop. I was hoping when I started Ritalin, I would lose a ton. But because of the other meds I was given I gained more weight. It’s just not fair. I have every single unique desirable feature a woman could have. Blonde hair, big blue eyes, naturally rosy cheeks. I even have Cupid bow lips. Then my body is a tragic nightmare.

Anonymous 115775

1000006795.jpeg

>block her
>give her time to realize she is blocked
>unblock her
>wait and see if she ever tries to message me again
so far none of them have passed the test

Anonymous 115776

>>115708
That' something I've noticed as well. I am definitely screwed.

Anonymous 115777

>>115577
Yeah, pretty much. They are fine if you are just acquaintances but an actual long term friendship it gets tricky.

Anonymous 115780

>>115775
maybe they just dont want to be friends with you anymore since they learned you are doing such retarded things

Anonymous 115781

>>115780
she told me she cared about me if she really did she would try and get in contact with me again. They are all liars. Everyone that has acted like or said that they cared about me was fucking lying.

Anonymous 115791

20220915_135239.jp…

I wish I didn't get attached so easily, I don't think I have it in me for another situationship where I obsess for a month and then they end up abandoning me.

Anonymous 115795

>>115776
yea maybe
people should not take things on the internet too seriously. most of this is constructed in a weird sleep deprived haze. also, its fun to ruminate but people should just try to enjoy life and not take things too personally or something
or something
also people shouldnt troll with irl stuff its lame

Anonymous 115799

f69ceaa07cb7c6fdfa…

i have never had a friend in real life, and i've never had a female friend online. it's starting to really hurt. i just want a friendship with another woman, where we understand each other's sorrows, celebrate each other's successes, and just have a good time together. i want a girl to cry with, a girl to share cute things with, a friend to love forever.

Anonymous 115800

IMG_0086.jpeg

>>115799
well
cats are not really good friends. cats hit each other sometimes for no reason. even among other cats. i still like cats dough
become rabbit-pilled

Anonymous 115802

>>115800
I'd become rabbit pilled but then my dog would eat the rabbit (she has a high prey drive)

Anonymous 115803

IMG_0093.jpeg

>>115802
the rabbit will likely get eaten by some prey animal, at some point at the end of their lifecycle. the bear will eat some prey other than the rabbit if the bear is hungry enough.

sometimes you wonder when the lifecycle of the rabbit will end. its a constant battle of getting hurt, adapting, and knowing to avoid predator species. maybe the rabbit will simply die of natural causes without getting eaten.

but if consumption of the rabbit happens, or the bear’s consumption of a prey animal happens, it will probably feel right for both. the bear will simply eat or the rabbit won’t fight back.

ultimately, for the rabbit, it is for the sake of preserving their progeny so the life cycle can continue.

Anonymous 115804

>>115803
oops
*eaten by a predator animal

Anonymous 115805

I was physically abused by my older brother. That was years ago, but I'm still frustrated.

Anonymous 115806

>>115805
maybe its because they still do bad things
history matters but how you act in the presence is much more important.

Anonymous 115816

IMG_0115.jpeg

i want it to hurt. because it means i am alive. and no one can ever take that away from me. i love that no one can ever take that away from me. i love my family so much and no one will ever take that away from me.

Anonymous 115818

i cant stop doomscrolling
why? i need something to do but if it feels good who cares.

Anonymous 115821

I have a disgusting masculine appearance and I am being bullied online. I want to die. Can I have some support, please?

Anonymous 115825

I am surprised every time I see women talking like the most scrotey scrote that ever scroted.
Why adopt the same rhetoric and language you were trying so hard to escape? It’s all so tiresome.

Anonymous 115826

1722143194243.png

>>115774
How much are you eating? I would say count your steps with a cheap pedometer or smartwatch. That's what has helped me lose weight. Don't try for something crazy, just try for 4k steps a day. Do that for a few weeks then up it to 5k steps, etc. I've been slowly losing weight and it's in a healthy way because of that.

>>115775
>>115781
https://web.archive.org/web/20171030054903/https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/DBT-Skills-Workbook.pdf
Read this book and continue to reread it and apply the principles it talks about. You need to put in the work, but your life will get easier when your fear of abandonment doesn't control you so much.

>>115776
I'm more autistic than my boyfriend and we work fine together. We've been together 5 years at this point.

>>115799
I've never had a long term female friend. I always schedule meet ups and they don't happen. It is what it is. I was isolated and not socialized, and women can pick up on that so they avoid me. I don't blame them. If I were raised normally, I'd ignore an outsider as well. Still, I yearn for female friendship. Perhaps one day we will meet in dreams, anon.

>>115805
I can empathize with that. I was SA'd by mine. It fucks with you for some time.
>>115806
Begone, schizo. She just said "that was years ago". Obviously the present is important, but anon is just venting.

>>115818
I love doomscrollmaxxing. However, it needs to stop at a certain point. I like to scrapbook instead. I'll screenshot social media posts and write about them in my scrapbook. It helps me engage more with the content I consume while ensuring I don't consume too much content.

>>115821
You're not disgusting. What support do you seek?

>>115825
Hard agree.

Anonymous 115829

44bf442811535b9d81…

Im starting to realize I have let my romantic relationships get in the way of my career and education. I'm over it now, thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend. Everytime I talk about issues with my current situation (job, housing, friendship) he will always go "just wait until you come up here it will be better." He even told me he wanted me to hold off on my certificate until I go up to Michigan and move with him. I decided no to that, bc we've been together since 2023 and we haven't seen each other in person this year and not even sure when I will be able to visit him. I also realiZE I don't want to uproot my life for anybody. I feel so dumb for somewhat letting that happen before. I can't keep doing this the rest of my twenties.

Anonymous 115831

>>115774
just stop eating. shrimple

Anonymous 115832

I've always been fat, naturally bigger frame, kind of tall and kind of ugly.
It makes me sad to think I'll never have an tall and handsome man princess carry me. It also makes me sad that kind of romanticism isn't really a thing, same with buying me flowers.

Anonymous 115838

One of my best friends died from a fentanyl overdose last year and I'm still having trouble coping. Idk how to deal with the fact that he's gone and never coming back. I went to his mom's birthday dinner yesterday and spent time around his brother for the first time and it wrecked me because he has the exact laugh and similar voice cadence it was so hard to look at him. I powered through it for his mom's sake and then went home and cried and I'm still a mess today. Idk how I'm supposed to just live the rest of my life without him in the world it's insane.

Anonymous 115849

GOD I WANT TO FUCK MY COLLEGUE SO BADLY HES SO HOT AND SWEET AND EDUCATED AND PATIENT AND NICE ID FUCK HIM LITERALLY 3X1 JUST LIKE THE CIPROCINAL HE SOMETIMES PERSCRIBES GODDAMN IT I DONT NEED TO BE HORNY AT WORK

Anonymous 115852

tumblr_ppbhfsMw4n1…

>>115547
I feel the same, nona. I consider myself bisexual and I want to be able to love both men and women normally, but men just make me so miserable. I hate how emotionally dumb they are, I hate how they can't recognize their own emotions or can't just be honest if they like you or not, and just make you feel like you're on a pendulum of "He likes me, he does not". I wish I had more girl friends to talk to because women usually just understand my emotions way, way better than men do. It's exhausting explaining to men over and over why something they do hurts, why I care about certain things, why I get strong emotional responses from things that they wouldn't give a crap about. I'm just so tired of feeling alone and left out, but I feel most women would hate me for being fat or being a bit masculine in my personality. I'm too straightforward, I don't know if I'm delicate, I don't know if I'm femenine, I… I just feel like all other women have their head well placed on their shoulders, know what they want, and would hate being surrounded by insecure, anxious, scared girls that can't do much but try to be kind and funny. I don't know where to go. I don't know what to do anymore.

Anonymous 115854

IMG_0162.jpeg

one of the things i really, really didn’t like in high school was having bad history teachers.

i remember growing up in my home state and being in a class with a history teacher who really didn’t give a shit about what it was he was teaching. in my class, there were students of all different groups that would be assigned, im not even joking, literal fucking paragraphs of shitty things that happened to a point where it felt sadistic. you’d memorize the dates, the events themselves, the leaders, the subjugated, the death toll, everything factual that happened all at once in a classroom that felt cold and silent. the students would grow up knowing these things but never really understanding why it mattered and internalizing the events silently, acting out towards “others” as adults.

when i took an APUSH class in a different high schools, i suddenly realized that history class was amazing if done well. my high school APUSH teacher was someone who knew that history was a story. he knew how to use humor and a heavy, heavy fucking dose of abstraction to the point where students loved to talk about history. everyone in that class loved being around each other because our APUSH teacher knew how hard it was to stomach the immensity of american history without a good story. and no, he never had to gratuitously talk about the facts and dates and unimportant details of history because he knew it didn’t truly matter so much as making sure the students knew why it was important to talk and discuss about what happened throughout america’s lifetime.
>basically
i loved my APUSH teacher and i really wish more history teachers were like him.

Anonymous 115857

90D0D8F3-B7B3-4887…

Regards to the girls who own 4chan. The true owners, the true admin, the true moderators.

4chan is a miracle of utmost potential. And I wish for the utmost potential. Likewise the rest of internet. Cheers to the gatekeepers and vibe protectors and the energy gardeners. Soul gardens.

My world should be abundantly full of forums and non-religious community centers and third spaces. Thus a world of lovers

Anonymous 115863

>>115854
also also
random afterthought
i honestly think history class should be optional. think about it- do your parents ever really talk about shitty things your family did, or shitty things that happened to your family? at least in my family we didn’t. so why should mandatory history education occur in public schooling?
some people just like cute stories of cute characters who do things that are good for the world. you don’t have to force people to read things bad that happened or write ten page essays about the various ways in which a historical group tortured a bunch of people. most people read history at a rate that feels comfortable for them and i have always liked doing so for myself.

or something. the end

Anonymous 115864

born to hug.png

Almost done with university and forced to move back in with my vile narcissistic parents. So first thing on the agenda, forcibly rewire my brain against all my natural dispositions into acquiring the ability to greyrock and completely shut down my emotions at will through whatever ancient transcendental chakra visualisation corporate mindfulness meditation technique, breathing exercise or contactless lobotomy available. Honestly, this world deserves to be completely incinerated, nothing less.

Anonymous 115870

i dont know whats wrong with me

Anonymous 115871

>>115870
Men are whats wrong with you.

Anonymous 115872

>>115871
Men are pretty much whats wrong with anything. Complete emotional fucking parasites.

Anonymous 115877

Tired of this shitty summertime job, glad that it will end soon. I don't know why I decided that joining some shady student organisation and going to work on industrial pigsty somewhere in the butt of my country was a good idea.
Now I am tired as fuck, sleep depraved, have bruises, scratches, calluses and dermatitis everywhere and hungry because I don't have time to cook normal food every day.
Also, there is a war and drones in neighbouring regions, so I also have to worry about my ass getting exploded literally.
My colleagues suck ass, they are the true swines on this crapfarm. Especially ones from artificial insemination section. Shit yourself, section boss. Bitch yelled and swore at me for zero reason, always told me to do some shitty work like cleaning shit, never taught me and other students to actually inseminate, never explained everything and deprived me of my bonus money just because she was in a bad mood last week. The rest of working collective wasn't really better, they also never teached us anything, always complained how students suck ass, only one man taughts us something and was kind to us. Now I work in piglets rearing section, so life got a bet better for me, yay.

Anonymous 115878

i think i have generally been confused my entire life under the impression i knew what i was doing

Anonymous 115880

I’m only in my mid-20’s and my sex drive is essentially non-existent. I’m devastated. I was such a horny teenager when I wasn’t sexually active but now that I am and in a relationship I am physically incapable of becoming aroused. I’ve considered seeing a doctor about this issue.

Anonymous 115881

I have arthritis in my foot and ankle because of a car accident. It fucking sucks.

Anonymous 115885

>observes something
>vomits everywhere

Anonymous 115886

hiccup

Anonymous 115889

Holy fuck hoply fuck do i feel inadequate. Stupid. Useless. Im 26z IM TWENTY FUCKING SIX.

What was thr point of any of it? What was the point of my life? Im so disgusted i think im gonna hurl. I legitimately have bile in my throat. I feel so fucking distressed it’s fucking alarming my whole body is abuzz the very words that im writing the fact that im writing them is making me want to rip my own fucking eyes out stupid fucking WASTE OF SPACE AND LIFE DTUOID FUCKING WHORE DUMB FUCKING CUNT DUMB FUCKING CUNT EVERYONE IS BETTER THAN YOU YOU LOSER YOU FUCKING TROGLODYTE EVERYBODY’S PASSED YOU BY YOU DUMB CUNT YOU ABSOLUTE WASTE OF OXYGEN EVEN YOUR OWN MOTHER DOESNT LOVE YOU CUNT CUNT CUNT CUNT RIP YOUR OWN EYES OUT COWARD CUNT

Anonymous 115893

IMG_0209.jpeg

sometimes i get very stressed and anxious and theres not really a combination of words to explain how i feel. i just want to be hugged during times like that until my heart rate goes down and everything feels okay again

Anonymous 115894

my house has really bad foundation and structural issues. so bad that the bricks are seperating so much i can see outside. though i dont know what ill do. i kind of gave up a long time ago. i should be grateful i have a home, as much as it is falling apart.

Anonymous 115902

>mood gives me 30 minutes to get ready for an unspecified road trip
>proceeds to go into only bathroom and take a shit for 40 minutes
>messages me on the shitter asking if I'm ready to leave

Are they all like this?

Anonymous 115908

I hate being ugly and having masculine features, I am short but my face looks like that of a man. Even the AI ​​detects me as a man. Now with trannies, ugly women are mistaken for one.

Anonymous 115909

>>115902
He was having a male period

Anonymous 115911

my boyfriend's friend found a titan in the background of an episode of aot that looks exactly like me and I feel so retarded because it's so fucking ugly. They post it in the server to make fun of him. Fuck my life

Anonymous 115914


Anonymous 115916

A friend of mine was molested from ages 6-9 by her older stepbrother who came out as a trans women after being kicked from the house for the molestation. I sent them an anonymous email that just said "I know what you did." just to fuck with them. They live in fear of being found out. Thinking ill send another email in a few weeks "Tik tok Moe"

Anonymous 115925

>>115911
Which one is it?

Anonymous 115940

>>115908
you are me. i am so sorry

Anonymous 115942

Screen Shot 2024-0…

>>115925
sorry i didn't upload it in my first post, it was hard to find. They post the anime one but it's this titan… is it over for me?

Anonymous 115943

>>115942
she's cute, so no, but if she does look like you that's pretty funny. what are you doing in AoT? 😭

Anonymous 115949

>>115942
just looks like a slightly exaggerated but cute japanese woman tho
your bf is a shitstain but that comes with the Y chromosome

Anonymous 115950

>>115949
>>115943
thanks nonas you're making me feel little better about it. It's just that this titan is a dude (I think they all are? I'm not an anime person.) and in the animated screenshot has a more exaggerated nose, which is one of my bigger insecurities. It's like not a hooked nose but a weird straight thing. Idk

Anonymous 115951

>>115950
distinct noses are cute nona, don’t let it bother you

Anonymous 115953

>>115942
Your posts made me laugh nona, the titan unironically doesn't even look bad tho. Don't worry too much about it lol

Anonymous 115954

9e5a6dbcd72e491797…

I miss her. I loved her and I loved that we could have had everything together. I'm trying to let go but it's hard.

Anonymous 115956

>>115954
is this about alice

Anonymous 115965

>>115954
same here anon I see her in my dreams a lot but I can’t talk to her I can only see her

Anonymous 115966

>>115954
If there was a pill I could take and go back in time then I would take it for sure. I'd go back before we both became so broken. I would find her then, at a time before we even knew each other. We could do everything right this time.

Anonymous 115972

help please.jpg

I’m really worried about a girl who seems to be caught in a situation of sex trafficking. Her pimp is monitoring her messages, and I feel helpless because I can’t find a way to reach out to her. It’s been keeping me up at night, and I just don’t know what to do.

Anonymous 115982

>>115972
Is there a sex trafficking hotline available in your country? Where I live I see them posted all over the place.

Anonymous 115983

>>115982
she doesn't know the language, I know someone who speaks English there working for a crisis shelter but she told me the girl has to ask for help directly, my only chance is to figure out a way to communicate with the victim without the pimp knowing, I don't live there, I feel so lost and I really need advice, I can't abandon her, I can't live like this

Anonymous 115993

>>115983
still looking for advice or ideas

Anonymous 115995

>>115983
Will written consent for help work?
If the man is monitoring her devices then obviously she can't send a text or anything like that but would like her signature of a piece of paper work?

Anonymous 115997

help pls.jpg

>>115995
The biggest challenge I’m facing is reaching out to her discreetly. I attempted to do a reverse search on her selfies, but I haven’t been able to find her social media accounts. I’m trying to stay as low-key as possible. If I can connect with her, I can share the information she might need or find out if she’s open to receiving help. For now, a screenshot of our conversation would be the most I can provide unless my friend requires additional details

Anonymous 116009

drinking my feelings away so I can sleep
lonely is the night

Anonymous 116022

>>115513
i have a crush on a coworker who has a family of his own it gets worse every time i see him and it's making me feel sick

Anonymous 116023

>>116022
Don't homewreck

Anonymous 116040

IMG_7547.jpeg

I am bleeding out inside. no one will ever love me the way I want to be in love. I want to cherish and be cherished, to be ravished and to give it everything I have. I want a savior on a white horse to steal me away from this dull and passionless world. I need someone to make me feel needed. I want someone to go all in with me. I want us to be one, no boundaries and no stops, loving each other like we're obsessed. something like that doesn't exist, right? no matter what, everyone is bound to get bored of you, right? I don't know what to do anymore, I don't think I can handle this intense loneliness much longer.

Anonymous 116041

>>116022
Do not act on it… Whenever you see him just pull out a mirror and look at yourself and tell yourself you're not pretty enough to ruin a family

Anonymous 116044

>>116022
>>116040
been there and am there currently. i asked my older brother for advice in getting over said crush and feelings and he said he had already experienced it dozens of times by my age ( im 26) and there is no way but to just live through it until you’re numb to the pain. its character development and makes you strobger emotionally. and the only way to keep living is to have hope. he is a good brother not like most moids. i have hope and faith because of him. a good male rolemodel may not fix my loneliness but it does make finding a moid to love me feel a bit less hopeless

Anonymous 116045

i have to much sa and csa trauma. i feel like a broken woman and like ill never be able to be a functioning member of society. everything is so difficult. idk wtf to do to stop feeling like my life is always derailing. i hate everything about my life i hate my life so much.

Anonymous 116046

>>116045
Have you tried getting help anon?
I know someone that's like you, somehow she's overcome it but I think sometimes she gets shaken up about certain things.

Anonymous 116051

>>116046
i have seen 3 therapists but it never works out because they either don’t treat trauma or my schedule doesn’t work with theirs, or they only do tele health which i cant do since i don’t have my own confidential private space for a tele health appointment. its so depressing and difficult, plus i don’t want my family to know about my problems since they’re not very supportive, and they would know if im going to therapy since they all know my work schedule ugh

Anonymous 116052

>>116040
Did something happen recently that made feelings like this flare up for you? It might take a while but the crushing loneliness will fade into background loneliness again eventually.

Anonymous 116053

>Friend A is a scholar, president of the lacrosse club in high school, goes to an incredible uni, confident and overall a perfect golden girl
>Friend B is a bass player, artistic type who fixes old tech, social activist esp on female and class issues
>we're hanging out at an event one day
>this really hot guy appears
>tall, handsome, older, with muscly forearms, ostensibly rich
>in the span of fifteen minutes these two smart, independent women become ditzy teens
>voice goes up several registers
>giggling like schoolgirls are the dumbest shit he says
>unironically pretending to not know what a treasury bond is so he can explain it to them
>the guy is just drinking it up, getting his ego massaged
>I'm just sitting there pissed off
>afterwards I ask them why they act like that, they shrug and say if you want a guy you need to act the more "feminine" so he'll pick you over all his other choices
Why do guys do this? Why aren't they attracted to intelligence, strength of character and wit? Is it some latent pedophilia in all men?

Anonymous 116056

>>116051
to heal you should prioritize getting out of a non supportive home, there's no way you can heal in a toxic living condition
>t.had a miserable life until I cut ties with my family

Anonymous 116057

>>116053
>intelligence, strength of character and wit?
Because a woman's health and youthfulness(an indication of fertility) is mote important to men.

Anonymous 116058

>>116053
Why would they? That's what women appreciate in men, it doesn't mean that it works the other way around. If something, being too "strong and independent" of a woman is repulsive to men. Men want a soft and sweet woman, not a competitive one

Anonymous 116065

>>116053
some boys dont like this emulation of immaturity in my experience

Anonymous 116067

>>116053
>this really hot guy appears
>tall, handsome, older, with muscly forearms, ostensibly rich
Do you yourself think this guy's really hot, or are you just saying he's "really hot" because that's what your friends think.

Anonymous 116069

>>116058
actually wanting a competitive independent woman is a red flag sometimes because some men want one so they can beat the competition and independence out of her with their strength. frequently out of jealousy and boyish immaturity. or they want a self-sufficient bangmaid to mooch off of. sometimes both.

i think most sane men want a woman who will appreciate being provided for and taken care of in some way or the other, even just emotionally, and even if she is “independent” in some way (nobody truly is).

Anonymous 116070

>>116053
I don't think it's pedophilia or as some say, feeling threatened by strong independent women. I just think it's more of a natural tendency for moids to want to provide for and protect a woman so maybe they look for women with more feminine or diminutive traits. I think the same goes for women in that they want a moid who fulfills these roles so they seek out moids who are mature and financially stable. It's probably just some evopsych

Anonymous 116072

My boyfriend knows nothing about cars and it makes me angry. Like you’re a man, that’s like one thing you’re supposed to know.

Anonymous 116080

>>116072
Super weird thing to be pissed about. How about teaching him, or having your dad teach him? He probably knows a shit ton of other manly topics. If not, you're probably with a chick.

Anonymous 116088

Why are all non-autistic men sluts? Why can't I find a non-autistic virgin?

Anonymous 116090

>>116077
>>116078
Why are you like this?
>case study shows men only respond to women that act like children
>conclusion: men don't value adult IQ and are attracted to children
>incel: makes up a emotional story about how chad is being blamed for having women fall over him and has to suffer being called a nonce (never called anyone a pedophile) in his victim story
You purposefully misconstrued that post and turned a logical observation into an emotional attack against you.. Why are misogynists such faggots?

Anonymous 116094

>>116088
Any adult moid who is still a virgin is going to have at least a touch of the tism'. You have to decide how much of that you are willing to deal with.

Anonymous 116096

Fuck it, I just want to find someone to trauma bond with again

Anonymous 116098

>>116094
Yeah, but that's only by accident, due to a culture that encourages sluttery. There's no substantial reason why a non-autist can't be a virgin.

Anonymous 116102

>>116094
because avtism WINS.

Anonymous 116127

ezgif-3-fd497bfe0a…

just wishing a haunting death to a narc who has abused me on many occasions and made me leave circles of good friends.
i seriously wish i…

Anonymous 116128

>>115954
oh eventually you will leave that
sadly by the time that happens you'll feel like a corpse
i feel like it most of the time

Anonymous 116165

Having a hard time with finishing novel series I like. Seriously, why does it seem like every book series nowadays has anticlimactic endings?

Anonymous 116166

My father’s a narcissistic brat
When I’m with him I lose all energy and want to kill myself

He said I’m like a dog because he could say the most hurtful things ever known to mankind and I’ll still be there because I’m terrified of being alone. He also told me I’m easy to manipulate
I have no one else and he knows it

Anonymous 116173


Anonymous 116184

Reading the manosphere obsessively as a teen has done serious damage to my psyche and self esteem to the point I'm almost terrified of them and I hate dating as well. It's all so bleak. Idk what to do.

Anonymous 116185

>>116184
What did you read there exactly?

Anonymous 116210

Having intrusive thoughts again. I keep imagining a scenario where I have a son and he rapes a girl in high school so I beat him to death. What is wrong with me?

Anonymous 116249

i fucking hate my dad for the way i was raised now i feel retarded and deal with the most dumbass mental issues imaginable

Anonymous 116268

space-jockey-by-gi…

Joints hurt

Anonymous 116271

Holy shit how does every woman in my peer group IRL support trannies? How? How do they support onlyfans??? And prostitution???? How?????? I genuinely hate these fucking freaks. I don't know where to find women who hate troons but not gays and who hate prostitution but not reproductive rights IRL. I'm so tired of knowing these gross bitches with no goals other than to spread pussy and butthole for moid shekels and validation. Fucking sick. I want to rant about laugh about trannies with a girl. I want to complain and bitch about scrotes with one. If anyone has any tips on how to meet likeminded women I'm all ears. I don't want to have online friends I want IRL friends. Fuck me.

Anonymous 116275

im really, really scared that my psychiatrists and therapists just laugh at my problems after we get off the phone. they’re always very cordial and helpful to me during the meeting, but i just know for a fact that after they close their laptop they have a good hearty kek while they pour themselves a drink

Anonymous 116276

>>116271
social media is a poison, it’s lead women into believing that you’re somehow less of a woman or a bad woman if you don’t support men getting in womanface. i’ll never, ever be able to understand how so many women support prostitution. i cannot comprehend how common it has become to be a prostitute or a pornstar.

Anonymous 116282

Why did I dream about her again? I'm not in love at all, I don't know why this keeps happening

Anonymous 116283

there are probably racist people who don’t care here but whatever i feel like shit and have nowhere to vent. just read some stupid racial science studies and it’s making me feel masculine for my race (was about whiter skin being more feminine). rationally i know that’s untrue and i usually shit on others who wallow about stuff like this but urghhh i just don’t feel good, unearthed some shitty feelings from childhood i guess

Anonymous 116284

>>116283
it’s stupid because i don’t think this even and i’m a lesbian who finds dark skin feminine it’s not even about scrotal attention i’m just down about it for some reason. like i feel like stuff like this has punched me down too many times i can’t get over it

Anonymous 116292

It's so demoralizing not being able to find a job like not even basic retail or fast food. I'm doing everything I can to escape neetdom because I know things will continue to get worse for me if I don't but it seems like everyone can get a job but me. It feels pointless to even do any of this

Anonymous 116299

>>116292
Samefag n0nna… the jobs that are meant for us will respond to us soon

Anonymous 116304

I hate my family.
After HS was over I attempted to get a job, my family always stopped me and sabotaged me because they wanted me to get into university/college, I took entrance exams at various then and always failed abysmally and then had my parents shout at me right after about how much of a failure I was, I'm the black sheep among extended family too.
The "best" members of my family are all passive meaning they are uncaring and just ignore me, it's better than asking about my job or college.
They all go along with news and social media about everything, opinions, politics, social issues, everything. It feels like they are never "aware". The ones that are hide it and pretend they disagree with me in public but agree in private, but not without saying I should "not bother" or "be quiet".
I remember every issue they later flip flopped on and changed their minds without an apology, or acknowledgement. I just had no evidence to be "right" yet.
They also say my friends all secretly hate me and just don't bother to drop me because I'm useful to them (this was said in reaction to my friend cancelling an hangout with me because she had to take her grandma to the hospital).
I hate my family so much yet I have no other home to go to unless I hitch with a scrote (not gonna happen). They always preach the blood is stronger than water too, I feel pity for my "crazy" grandma that mistrusts everyone and gets laughed at, I know that they just help that mindset of hers to fester.

Anonymous 116306

i had a very vivid dream today that was quite scary to think about. i feel sick after thinking about it, because i truly think my brain was trying to tell me something, it wasn't like one of those dreams where nothing makes sense, but my brain decided to tell it in a very gruesome manner.

i have lots of dreams where i am hiding from someone or something trying to hurt me. this particular dream was so vivid and sickening i rambled about it in my journal (which, by the way nonas, is always a good thing to have) and as i wrote it down i realized it had a lot of parallels to my life.

anyways maybe i will relay it onto here later, it was a very vivid dream but i know sometimes people get bored listening to other people's dreams. also, do you guys ever have dreams that scare you, or where it seems like your brain is trying to tell you something?

Anonymous 116308

I went to a funeral today. The guy who passed wasn't a very close friend of mine, but it was still someone I grew up with. Seeing his friends and family so upset made me really sad too. It's hard to just go about the rest of my day while thinking about how upset his friends and family still feel. Talking to a parent who has lost their child is just so profoundly sad. I'm not really sure what to do with myself just feeling so bummed.

Anonymous 116312

My life is literally fine. I just overcame a crisis and everything is going the best it could possibly be for me. Still the suicidal thoughts are back today. Again. They never leave me for long. Why does it always have to be like this for me? It has been going on for many years, no matter what I do

Anonymous 116313

>>116306
Yeah, I get the most disgusting sexual dreams imaginable now. Used to be just flashbacks but I don’t think what’s happening in these dreams now ever happened irl. I don’t know why, or what this is trying to tell me. Maybe just that I‘m traumatized and fuck up. Someone send help. Idk

Anonymous 116317

I have stopped getting angry on my bf for his faults. I just get disappointed each time and blame myself for being with him. I feel like he has successfully manipulated me into believing that I'm expecting too much from him. Yesterday I went to a diner with him and he ordered everything as he likes and when it came to the dessert I wanted to order something that I wanted to have from a very long time but he practically forced me to order something else instead .I know it's a very small thing but things like this add up so often. He gets things how he wants them to be and it's always me compromising for his sake.

Anonymous 116322

>>116283
>>116284
I get you. I have extremely pale skin so can't relate there, but I have some different "masculine" features and generally look a bit weird. Looks don't define us or our value, sometimes that insecurity creeps in, that comes of considering that other people might look down on you for your looks. and even if you're a lesbian, I think most women know deep down how socially advantageous it is to be conventionally attractive. My advice is to do your best to stop focusing on it and instead focus on what you already have and what you can achieve, but I know that's easier said than done. Plus I'm sure you have other beautiful, feminine features some would love to have.

Anonymous 116323

I need to find a job and move out to feel something again

Anonymous 116333

Who the fuck created a Starbucks careers account with my name and email address??? They put my name as [first name] [first name] and it was done while I was at work. What do they mean by this. And I’m pretty sure only my family and higher up’s at my current job have my email, and my roommate I guess, but whoever made it doesn’t even know my last name?

Anonymous 116336

I need to yap out about this guy from my past.

When I was 17 I e-dated this dude, he eventually came to my country and we spent like 3 weeks together.

We ended on kinda eh terms, I was 18 then and I didn't know what I want, I was kinda rude about it. He got really hurt, I didn't talk to him for a while. After the breakup he kept asking about me to a mutual friend. Then like at the start of a new relationship, he tries contacting me again.

A few months ago he unfollows me on instagram and facebook, which is fine, I get it. He doesn't remove me off snapchat while he uses it really frequently. I haven't thought about him for like 2 years, and now he keeps popping into my head and it's getting SO annoying. WHy the fuck does my brain do that?

It's so frustrating bc my life has been the best it's ever been and I keep getting plagued by this fucking thought it's so goddamn frustrating.

Anonymous 116337

Im so tired nonas. Ive been working for free for the past 9 months or so. At first, I justified it to myself thinking, oh well i need experience anyhow and this is a field where juicy positions are reserved to doctorate holders anyways and its a bad market, and this particular market i found myself in (resident in another shithole, think middle east) is especially bad or filled to the brim with grifters and code monkeys who seem like they teleported from the year 2006. I feel a general distaste towards anything and everything, but beneath the distaste i still feel driven like, i still feel like i want to work, like im a ball of energy and all that energy is being wasted so long as its not being directed in a good direction. and like i know what positions i want to pursue now before attempting to prep for a phd, but by god i am tired, i am like physically tired, my days have taken a sheen of repetitive monotony, like im an animated corpse moving from location a to b. dont get me wrong nonas i am grateful. like almost 11 months ago my brother attempted to anhero, and that was… like a legitimate crisis the whole family s been ensnared in, so now that im in a postion where im no longer walking on eggshells expecting the worst and instead am complaining of monotony and repetitiveness like if anything that is a blessing that i am very grateful for. but like im 26. and in the past whenever that sentiment `oh what do i have to show for my 20+n years of life?` its such an intense turmoil inducing sentiment that it destabilizes me for days, but now i find myself acknowledging my lack of accomplishment with the weary resignation that comes to those very close to giving up. i have no real friendship or social circle where i live (beyond my immediate family and even then we are co existing if nothing else). i have no real income. no means to plan for anything. i go on instagram and i instantly regret it but also cant look away from all my peers living the life ive always dreamed of (still dream of). and god i know im painting such a pitiful picture now, but im so tired, and really, apart from luch (which id just had) i realized that i dont have much to look forward to in my day. I feel almost lethargic like id rather go to sleep. i want to go home. im sick of this place. how common was this feeling in my life. except when i was younger there was always the cope `go past this hurdle, once this crisis passes everything will be better` but no. im virtually in the same place, with even less if anything i mean i had better recognition when i was 20, now im 26 and being use and no one regards me as anything but expendable.

Anonymous 116341

Oh my fucking god I want to kill myself my friend thinks I’m copying her

Anonymous 116352

I hate feeling so anxious and retarded even playing online with people from here makes me super nervous

Anonymous 116353

20231005_194818.pn…

I recently was invited to a women-only group by my sister that has women who aren't trying to recruit you to their pyramid scheme or convert you and invite you to church.
Lots of ladies with their iwn businesses and shit all networking, makin' friends, and offering up work.
First meeting was at a bar, which was great! Because alcohol makes socializing tolerable for me.
I had such a good fucking time, and then went home.
Next day, my mom texts me with "I've never seen your sister so depressed before. What happened last night?"
Apparently she was "really anxious and wanted support but [I] was hanging out at the bar most of the time"?? She literally never said anything to me about it?? And she has been snarky af to me ever since. I apologized profusely and explained myself, but she wasn't having it.
I skipped the last meeting because holy shit she's been so passive-aggressive. Might have to give up on this awesome group to avoid awkward feelings/situations between us.

Like, damn….. I just wanted to socialize with other women. I honestly have no idea if I genuinely fucked up or not? I've been so damn confused and sad about it.
Back into isolation, I guess.

Anonymous 116355

>>116353
Confront her about it anon, it's not worth isolating yourself just to calm you sister down.

Anonymous 116357

I’ve been smoking weed daily for about a year, I ran out a couple days ago. I’m so anxious and I keep ruminating over all of the extremely embarrassing stuff I have done over the years. I want to get more just to make the thoughts stop. I should take a break but I can’t take this. Good thing my drug of choice isn’t like heroin or opioids if just weed gives me such bad withdrawals kekkk

Anonymous 116358

it upsets me that humans didn't evolve like insects. i wish that we could do what bees do, and throw out useless/excessive males. it makes me rage that i can't be like a praying mantis or a black widow. i wish we evolved as the stronger sex, life would be better.

Anonymous 116359

5098A8EB-8E0A-4B49…

Feminism/Bigotry must win.

Anonymous 116360

Hearing news of a boy that managed to kill all his family with a knife…why did I try to make him faint lmao the neck would have been perfect as I thought ah so regretful

Anonymous 116363

>>116353
they are snakes who are trying isolate you. go live ur life

Anonymous 116372

>>116355
I've tried to for the last month, but she claims she's too busy to have a full conversation about it yet. Just…. waiting on her to be NOT busy so we can talk things out, but she is being exploited at her work, so she's been busy.

>>116363
You're probably right. But she might get pissy, and I'll have to hear about it from my mom. Like, damn, I just want a peaceful existence.

Anonymous 116374

>>116317
He's controlling you . This doesn't get better.

Anonymous 116396

I work as a nurse from 0730-1630 Mon-Fri with a 30 minute commute and every day I'm so tired and depressed. I just can't believe that this is going to be the rest of my life. I have no interest in anything and I'm completely tired at the end of the day. I legitmately don't know what to do anymore, I feel like my spark for life has died after getting my degree and working full-time.

Anonymous 116403

>>116396
I work healthcare too and it's draining as hell. You could look into Telehealth?

Anonymous 116408

_f0c12e93-9b88-40d…

I'm too much of a pussy to actually do it, but man do I wanna die. I guess being sex abused as a kid takes a mental toll on you for a long time…
Damn.

Anonymous 116412

ad2f8a909438568123…

>>115513
My boyfriend got drunk and admitted that he's a pedophile, molested his niece in her sleep, finds white women 80% as attractive as Asian women, only married me because he wants white kids, thinks that women are most attractive at 13, thinks about fucking every single woman (not old or ugly or over 180lb) that he sees in public and that he "thinks about his niece's feet a million times every second", and pretends i'm other people during sex.
I love him in every other way. And can cope with his moid mind. We are extremely-unbelievably compatible, and I wont ever leave him because I wont ever find anyone who want to have a life with more. He thinks that 80% of men are pedos. He has normal friends and they are pedos.
He says he wont molest our kids because he's not attracted to his half-sister who he grew up with.
He also mentioned how his niece once told him that her father groped her in the shower, when she was pre-pubescent. The niece and her parents are good friends with us, the only people in his family I can talk to.

I have no friends, nobody to talk to this about. It makes me feel… ? it makes me feel like an animal. the niece has been FTM for a long time, so at least she's not as much of a worry for me. But his eyes, they're on every woman. on kids, on the niece. HOW DO I STOP CARING? really, ill get over it. but I just wanted to share my pain. sorry

Anonymous 116414

>>116412
Did he like, drop every single one of those bombs on you in one big drunken rant?

Anonymous 116415

>>116412
>“I love him in every other way”

this has to be bait

Anonymous 116416

>>116414
You didn't know? The police uses that technique during difficult interrogations. You give a few shots of tequila to the suspect and "very well, inspector, I shall now narrate every aspect of my rambunctious life of crimes and tribulations in minute details. It all started in my early childhood when I pocketed a lollipop from the bodega down the street. It tasted of strawberry and petty delinquency"

Anonymous 116418

>>116412
Well, as the normoids say, may this relationship never find me.

Also

>moids

>immoral women who justify their moral failings and mistakes

I really tried not to be contemptuous. But good God

Anonymous 116419

Idk why but my older incelish brother keeps harassing me when I go to the bathroom, keeps pressuring me to go places with him driving even to my medical appointments that I want private from him.

And he pressures me to check my phone, in case his shitbox breaks down, so I can drop everything and drive out to pick him up. Like I cant even go out and relax, without him "testing" if Ill respond. He tells the whole family if I dont respond at all/in time, and they all turn on me, since males are favored. I feel exhausted with his bs. I just want him to leave me alone. But he has anger issues (others say hes just waiting to explode, laughing it off like its cute) and holds a grudge for decades. The other day he said hes still mad cause I didnt check my phone for a few hours ONE TIME many months ago, and his shitbox broke down, and he had to walk thru a safe (for men) area to get home. I said he could have called someone else or an uber, but he said "no I wouldnt do that". As if its wrong to inconvenience them, but not me.

Will be a long time before Ill ever get to move out in this expensive place. No friends or extended family either. He basically ruins everyday and theres no escape from him. Why look forward to the cozy fall when hell just ruin that too?

Anonymous 116420

>>116353
Wow that sounds like my brother whos the golden child and my mom always sides with him. They act so weird and turn on me over the smallest things. Like if brother says some "joke" about "bricking" an elderly woman neighbor (because she rightfully pointed out that hes a lazy POS who doesnt do home repairs), and I dont laugh enough/I make a micro facial expression of annoyance, that will send him into a pity spiral. Then mom will be like, "why do you hate us?".

At least youre not completely isolated, dependent, and socially challenged like I am.

Maybe email or call any connections you made?

Anonymous 116421

>>116414
Essentially, we stayed up until like 5 talking before he puked and passed out. I knew a bit about the niece before this, but that's all. We have been dating for 4ish years.
>>116418
Yeah I read the incest diaries (the mom and every other woman in the book hates the girl who was molested whenever she brings up anything about it) and heard about the controversy with Alice Munro (did nothing when her husband molested their daughter) and thought to myself "I would never do such a thing" like a week before he admitted this all to me. But the molestation might have not even be something that his niece remembers since "she is a heavy sleeper", even though it happened more than 20 times allegedly.
Also she is 18 this week and it happened a long time ago. And about the dad… I have no information besides that tidbit and it happened forever ago. I can't do anything about the situation besides break up with my boyfriend, but I wouldn't do that unless he cheated or touched a child in real life.

Anonymous 116422

>>116412
My boyfriend and I went to the house of the parent's of the niece one time. They live far away so we stayed the night ( I know.. but it didn't happen, i think. i don't know).
I stayed up late talking with the parents about all sorts of things, mostly politics.
The mother brought up something about feet and laughed and gave me a look. A look! A knowing look?

And his family jokes about his obvious foot fetish, because he stared at the feet of all the girls in the household as a kid and told me stories of the "Games" he would play to touch them. Anyway, so the mother knows, but how much?
She is very bpd. I've thought of asking her if she thinks if male sexuality is evil. I wouldn't though.
But is it? Just the kind of men who gravitate to troubled women, maybe.

Anonymous 116423

>>116304
I can sort of relate. Mixed feelings because they have really helped and been there for me in some important ways, but sometimes I feel like they stunted my life. Im the blacksheep so no extended family either. Every dream I ever had was stomped on or mocked. Sabotaged or at least discouraged everytime I tried to get a job. Always told how evil women were by my own mom, who still to this day calls random women or even icons of women "dumb bitches", and only validated me if I agree with her views. I only recently opened my eyes to that internalized misogyny. I still struggle with self hate.

An older male relative passed away more than a decade ago, but he hated us. My last memory of him is him seeing my parents and I, then turning his back. He knew my mom/his sister got beaten by a spouse, which traumatized my siblings and I, and did nothing, not even offer a place to stay. Like the rest of moms family, who also encouraged her to go back to the abuser, "because the wedding cost too much". This year my family still makes a point of mentioning the day when that male relative passed away. I feel sort of bad saying this, but I didnt care that he died then, and I dont care now.

Anonymous 116424

>>116292
>>116299
Wishing you both luck.

Youre both leagues ahead of escaping neetdom compared to me. I dont even try because I have no references. If I ever did get a job, I know my family will sabotage me trying to sleep each night, with howling laughter, making noise or food/chemical smells throughout the home, or random jumpscare booms due to moving furniture, at all hours of the night. Plus Im very afraid to be out by myself.

Anonymous 116426

>>116283
I think more women than we realize are told as children to hate themselves, in such indirect ways, regardless of background.

My family and I are northern european on the one side, southern european on the other. The parental domestics were atrocious as one hates the other for being too different in culture, behavior, etc. but still decided to have children with that person lol.

But I remember being told that "thank God your hair isnt black like your (southern eu) cousins, that would be awful". The southern eu side was associated with evil, hence dark hair = bad in that persons mind, even though the northern eu side wasnt all sunshine and roses either. Contrast to this, I was told by the same parent that she was glad my eyes werent blue, basically said she would hate me if they were. This was because grandma/moms mom treated her like garbage for not having blond hair/blue eyes, favored the daughter that did have those features. Everytime some classmate was a jerk to me, that parent would ask what hair or eye color they had. Then if they had the same eye color as me (from dads south eu side), the same parent would be like, "yep, I bet that bitch/bastard/whatever is (my dads southern eu ancestry)." Same parent will deny that I have half of my dads dna, as if she cant love me if Im not 100% her familys dna. I grew up being denied my dads ancestry, so as not to be associated with "evil".

Same parent still pressures me to lighten my hair tho. F that I love my natural dark brown hair.

So I grew up hearing both extremely dark and extremely light features demonized.

Anonymous 116428

Would most sane people consider it sexual assault when people know you blackout routinely but continuously push or pressure you into sexual acts when binge drinking because you're suicidal?

Anonymous 116430

>>116421
Yikes. I had a visceral reaction reading this. I hope against all hope that you’re just LARPing because otherwise you are spineless, witless and fucking evil.

The fact that your body isn’t involuntarily breaking out in hives and actively rejecting intimacy from this vile scrote is a testament to how base you are. Ew ew ew

Anonymous 116431

>>116292
Right? Hahaha. I graduated top of my state in my thirdie shithole. Like that mattered. Boy did that one success get to my 17 year old, half formed soft head. I thought that meant I was worthy. I dunno. The next 8 years I’ve proceeded to watch every single peer I had/have had, outpace me. I have girlie friends who’re currently living my dreams. I’m not claiming they’re undeserving of their success, or that their achievements sort of fell into their laps, or that they were subjected to a lesser hardship than whatever I’m going through (gone through). It’s just something to add to the pile of frustrations that makes me feel lesser than an animal (with regards to achievement, accomplishment).

I am so indistinguished, it’s so funny. Today in particular I feel a special kind of humiliation. Like i might slide into my ex situationship’s dms and ask for a referral or something. But no. Im too prideful. Thank fuck.

Anonymous 116432

Every day for two weeks ive been actively dissociating after 6pm. Headphones on. Plethora of old ass history textbooks, accounts from antiquity, the Peter Green biography, and the next 4 hours of every evening are pissed away with me maladaptively daydreaming about alexander the great.

Anyways, i haven’t had a crush in 3 years and haven’t been aroused in a year and a half. I rub my fully clothed clit against the armchair rest every once in a while but my libido’s at an all time low. Im like so tired. I just want a job in my field of choice. I wanna take a hike. Im so tired. My head is pounding.

Anonymous 116433

It's so much easier to be alone than it is to have someone and live with the fear of being abandoned. He loves me /now./ He says I'll never have to be alone again /now./ But what about in six months? A year? Ten? I'm terrified, and I can't back out now.

Anonymous 116435

Depressed

Anonymous 116438

I was at a party on the weekend, mostly sober with my friend sitting next to me. She kept stroking her hand on my thigh and holding my hand. At first I kind of resisted since practically all our work friends were there and our job is like a powderkeg of gossip but then I just gave in. I didn’t think anything of it at the time and have never seen her in any light except as a friend, plus we are both in straight relationships but I keep thinking about it since and feeling some kind of way.

Anonymous 116439

So I went to my date yesterday and the guy told me about his sexual history (like 200+) and then asked about mine and I didn’t answer him because what the fuck. But because I didn’t answer he was asking if I was a virgin and I kept deflecting the question but it made me so self conscious because I am (obviously) and he was framing it like there was no way I could be a virgin because I’m 26. Anyway I did not answer him because fuck that, but now I can’t stop feeling so self conscious. It’s not something I usually care about, but in the moment it felt like if I said yes that would’ve been like the worst thing in the world. And weirdly, a similar thing happened with the last guy I went on a date with (which was when I was 24) and I did answer honestly that I was a virgin and he was so surprised and kept asking me all these questions and it made me feel like shit. And now I feel like the older I get, the more I’m going to get reactions like that so I just want to have sex and get it over with.

Anonymous 116441

i'm sorry i am on the verge of a complete breakdown, nothing is working out, every single thing blows up in my face. My lower back is killing me, and my doctor said that not only will it not get better, it will get worse with age. I'm 20 years old, I can't live like this. I am in constant pain, I can't find a job, all of the jobs I can work currently are labor intesive, I can't do it, I just can't, I've lost my appetite, I hate food nothing tastes good anymore, I am dizzy and so weak, I have no desire for anything anymore, nothing is working out, I ruined myself, I ruined my life, it's over, it's just over. and i only have myself to blame. I should have died, I should have. is this what you call life?

Anonymous 116442

>>116441
Smoke some weed. Might help with the pain and your appetite.

Anonymous 116444

I was SA'd pretty regularly as a kid when I was starting to go through puberty for a period of a few years. I was raised by a mother who wanted her girls to remain girls. Our hair was not dealt with properly, our clothes were nearly all handme-downs, and in general, my mother seemed to be deeply misogynistic inside. I was interested in makeup and other "girly" interests and yes, part of it was because I wanted to be attractive. The person who molested me called me ugly all the time (and I did, I looked like a dork with large glasses, etc.). Well, I remember one of the first times I wore makeup and my dad told me I looked like a prostitute. I was 14. My sisters never wore makeup and wore dumpy clothes by contrast. My parents were happy with this. Well, I did end up getting positive attention for my looks, but what hurts me to this day is how my mom always made sure to call my sisters beautiful, gorgeous, etc. and I never got compliments like that. The most I ever got was "you look nice" if I dressed to the nines for prom or whatever. Nothing else. The guy who abused me (relative) would also compliment my sisters, but not me. I always had something wrong with my appearance. I felt so hideous to my own family.

Now that I'm older, in my late 20s, it's strange. The relative who abused me always tries to push makeup onto my sisters saying stuff like "look what it did for anon" and he has asked me if I've had plastic surgery (I haven't). I feel so terrible. I wanted this relative to like me as a little kid and I didn't realize that some of the things he was doing to me would result in the SA. He never liked me and always complained about my personality as a kid to my parents, etc. I'm jealous of my sisters because my parents still shill them even though they appear plain to me and don't attract significant attention for their appearance from others. I just wish my mom and abuser would call me pretty someday.

Anonymous 116450

>>116428
if you are sober enough to consent yes people should consider it sexual assault. my heart hurts for you, i'm sorry to hear you've been abused this way.

Anonymous 116453

IMG_1741.jpeg

do you guys have any experience with? cults are a very interesting phenomena

im also starting to suspect that they've become increasingly common online and in corporate work culture.

some interesting patterns regarding cults:
>referring to themselves as families
>weaponizing and indoctrinating vulnerable members - for example, substance abusers, individuals who have been victims of SA, people with mental illness
>memory holing, gaslighting
>repeated shaming rituals
>isolating members of the cult and turning them against "others", including family and friends

an interesting article i read:
https://newrepublic.com/article/162856/spot-cult-cultish-language-fanaticism-review

the feeling of being in a cult is very insidious. ive never really been "in" one, i used to grow up wondering if i was mentally strong enough to overcome the sort of tactics they use. but i do think the tactics of a cult are becoming very widespread.

anyways, back to the question - do you guys have any experience with cults?

Anonymous 116460

>>116453
There’s this podcast you might find interesting called Sounds Like a Cult. She talks about a different fringe group each week and sometimes it’s completely innocuous things like the Cult of Pickleball or Bachelorette Parties or something. Then other times she’ll cover actually dangerous groups like the Cult of Twin Flames or K-Pop.

Anonymous 116473

>>116453
One time I dreamt that NXIVM cult leader Keith Raniere rescued my from imprisonment in an abandoned warehouse. Once outside, we exchanged contacts and I became his Discord kitten. The cybersex was terrible. Really glad I woke up from that one because IRL I'm a lesbian.

Anonymous 116474

i've felt like shit most of my life but i've had a few days where i felt so great and alive that it makes me wonder if i'm just crazy and it's all in my head. i know i was tested to technically have sleep apnea but i sincerely doubt that's why through my entire youth i felt awful tbh. i think something like me is just not supposed to live. i actually fucking hate that i had a few decent days where i felt normal and alive bc it just felt good…living. talking to a friend. etc. and i don't normally feel like that bc i have a constant horrible headache, pain and tension all over my body, and i just can't think. everything's a fog. it feels like torture, even though i know it's just all in my head.

Anonymous 116486

>>115577
I had a similar experience with a girl I met. We hit it off really well and I somehow managed to get past my neuroses to ask her out a couple of times but then she ended up talking about herself all the time. If I bring up something about me it kind of got brushed off or an have awkward silence until I brought the conversation back to her. I don't think she does it on purpose but I don't think I have the emotional skills to deal with this so our thing just kind of fizzled out

Anonymous 116489

essentially gave my bf an ultimatum of either we spend more time together or im breaking up with him. i phrased it in a way where i told him im only giving him one chance to make time for us. for reference i've seen him 3 days in the last 2 weeks - one of which was only for 1.5 hrs. i know he's in a very demanding academic program but im so fucking done. what i sent is probably shitty but i dont want to spend our whole relationship missing someone who literally lives 10 mins away from me

Anonymous 116490

>>116489
ok i feel guilty over the message in general but fuck im pretty sure he's sleeping and will wake up to that. i feel like shit

Anonymous 116493

>>116489
if he lives 10 mins away cant you guys move in together, even he has schoolwork to do all day long you could cook or shower together or smth

Anonymous 116497

I got banned at a McDonald's because I kept putting a fake number for the BOGO promo receipt survey.

Anonymous 116503

>>116493
we've only been together six months

Anonymous 116519

fipper2.PNG

i love my favorite character SO MUCH and nobody fucking understands me. i love her so so so so so so so so much and feel so lonely because there's nobody i can sperg out about her to and there's nobody else who loves her as much as i do. everytime i do they are like "haha yeah you are so right" but deep down inside i know they think im crazy and disagree with me and are just being nice about it because they're afraid of my psychotic autism. i once 3 months straight tried to make a tulpa and it almost worked because i heard her voice inside of my head once like i can't just be normal about this anymore even if i tried. im so fucking angry i dont get anime girl hallucinations but the stupid fucking scary regular ones its not fair. picture unrelated

Anonymous 116520

>>116519
>picture unrelated

thank you for clarifying

Anonymous 116523

i'm taking antidepressants and they make me fart so much it's insane

>>116453
a jenovah's witness tried to recruit me one time at a bus stop but that's it. they stick their stupid fucking pamphlets all over the city and i always throw away the ones i find. they always make them relevant to whatever tragedy is currently happening in my country to play on people's feelings of fear and uncertainty. i hate them so much it's unreal

Anonymous 116526

Racist moids complaining about a mother with twins when he's the one not moving his scooter, fuck I should've said something

Anonymous 116528

When life is shit and then you get physically sick too.

Anonymous 116530

>>116474
You may want to look into your hormonal fluctuations, see if your cycle contributes with how you’ve been feeling. It’s unreal how much our hormones can affect everything from our mood to how we feel physically.

Anonymous 116534

I want to find a new game to play with my friend but so many games are dark and straight up ugly or smarmy quirky indieshit. I already spent 1500 hours on Stardew valley I'm not doing it again.

Anonymous 116535

My friend called me on my day off, asked what I was doing, said "good! Can you do me a favor?" when I told her I wasn't doing anything. She wanted me to go out and buy her a fan because hers broke, and she was running late for work or else she would have done it herself. I ask "with my money?" She says "no, no, I'll zelle you after!" Even though she hasn't paid me back for the money I already loaned her last week because her account was overdrawn. She didn't even mention it

Anonymous 116539

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I haven't gathered my thoughts enough to make a separate thread but I have to keep restarting my life over and over, each time a bit older and sicker and I'm going nowhere. 37/38 and failure to launch and unemployed NEET after a year of an opportunity where I failed to "catch on" and make something of myself hurts. I'm trying so hard to not get the miniscule amounts of hope I have left get snuffed out.

Anonymous 116541

why don't my fucking neighbors have an indoor voice? why do these bastards need to have every fucking conversation by yelling.

Anonymous 116543

sandwich.jpg

It's been a long while since I've been here and on LC, but it's down so I guess I'll cry here. I've been battling a cat flea infestation for months, I think around five now. My apartment complex and the pest control company they have on deck both suck so much. I have made complaints about this stupid fucking moid that they keep sending me and still no progress. I didn't even open the door today and the fucker was wiggling the door knob and I saw him stick his ear to the door to listen for me. I want the first one they sent out first. He was such a qt John Denver lookalike it took my breath away. I even thought his Napoleon Dynamite sounding voice was kind of cute. I wanted to molest him. He got everywhere and I didn't see any for a week. If he would've kept coming I think I'd be done by now, but noooo. Anyway, I have no clue what to fucking do. I think I'm going to have to get out of NEETdom to hire a more reliable company myself. I hate everyone here especially the new management and owner. The last office lady we had was incredibly rude over the phone, but when you went to face her she was no bark and no bite, and got shit done when you were firm. I miss her and I wish so many people didn't complain about her because now we are stuck with SLOPPops. Is anyone else currently going through an infestation? I don't even have any pets which is the annoying part. I kind of want to ask online to see if anyone would let me borrow their flea medicated pet so they'll all die once they bite them, but I doubt someone will let me without payment. I hate fleas. FUCK YOU!!!

Anonymous 116548

my stupid boyfriend never wants to do stuff when i want to do it or when i recommend it i always have to wait until he 'comes up' with it 6 months later and by that point he makes the plans in a way where im excluded or not part of it. im a big fan of movies and i recommend him a lot of films, he never wants to watch with me until recently but its only movies HE chooses, and just now he texted me about hosting a 'watchparty' between him, me, and one of his female friends who he knows i dont especially approve of to watch one of my FAVORITE movies ive been recommending for a while. because im a moron i get excited and then almost immediately he takes it away and says he might just watch it alone with one of his male friends next weekend, if his female friend declines the watchparty invitation. one of my favorite movies. and it doesnt even matter what i want to do? I feel spineless

Anonymous 116549

>>116548
My ex was like that. It annoyed the hell out of me when I would send memes before they got noticed by the general public and would only find them funny if his friends sent them to him. LATER ON. And then he'd send them to me as if I DIDN'T SEND THEM TO HIM A LONG TIME AGO. I even recommended websites for fun and the fucker never paid attention. "Oh, I don't really like how it works." Months later. "Hey Anon, check out this website my new friend from class showed me." I SHOULD'VE KILLED HIM.

Anonymous 116553

Why is recycling so hard for her? Stop being a lazy ass gdi

Anonymous 116558

>>116548
break up with his useless ass. this will be a massive flaw of his especially if you get married. why are you still with him if he just ignores everything you like

Anonymous 116563

thank-zenithar-its…

i don't think i'll ever experience being in love
when i was a teenager i was so anxious about getting hurt i never pursued anything and i hoped i'd grow out out of it but now i'm the 28 year old freak who's never even kissed someone (sober at least)
women think i'm straight and the only men who hit on me are so fucking ugly it genuinely hurts my ego kek

Anonymous 116566

>>116563
tbh I think if you’re really pretty, you get the most attention from the creepiest “ugly” guys because sometimes they’re also delusional.

Anonymous 116571

z59x6.jpg

how do I cope with self hatred and loathing for thinking I was a lesbian for 10+ years only to end up dating a moid? I feel like a big joke sometimes and wish I had never came out to everyone when I was an easily influenced 13 yr old who desperately wanted attention

Anonymous 116586

You stupid fucking bitch I am not the first person to make a light-hearted joke about your baby's weird ass name and I'm certainly not going to be the last. Why don't you set her up for success, instead of being yet another one of those asshole parents who name their children a name you'd give to a mixed breed lab? Thanks for the apology after blowing up on me like a brain-dead moron but this was your third strike and you had no idea, kek. Don't talk to me about pregnancy hormones, she's not the one who's pregnant.

Anonymous 116588

>>116571
You were just a child nona, be easy on little-you. There's a lot of social pressure and mind games played on kids to get involved in lgbtp.

Anonymous 116590

why does he do evil genius 4d chess kind of stuff, I lost money ( a bit not a lot) over an idea of mine and he basically already knew 100% it would have happened (because his work was also very related to my idea) and yet he actually said he didn't say anything to "teach me a lesson"
He is a scorpio too

Anonymous 116593

My only friend is an adult with the education and life-knowledge of a 10 year old, it continuously blows my mind how fucking clueless she is about anything I have to remember she's only like this because of her nightmare christian trad parents who have turned her into this on purpose.

Anonymous 116594

In a completely dependent living situation, very controlling environment, isolated with no friends or external family, saving up to be independent one day.

In the same living space is a creepy relative who harasses me for years now, with the permission and approval of a second relative. Male relative has deep anger issues just waiting to explode, is highly controlling, very obsessed with driving me places. I even sleep different hours on purpose to avoid him, but it doesnt always work.

Wanted to see if male relative takes pictures of me, so looked through his things. Male relative noticed a few things a tiniest bit out of position, like a paper slightly at a different angle than he left it, accused a neutral person of doing this. Now its tense and quiet.

Anonymous 116595

I hate that I have to use Facebook for the local groups and the Nextdoor app because some dumb shit is always happening now and it's the only way to keep up with the happenings since everything is not always posted on both platforms.

Anonymous 116597

i have terrible back acne and it hurts like a bitch !!!

Anonymous 116601

I need to go outside instead of taking ritalin and vitamin D, what is even going on? Oh i was going to say that i wish i could go back to being a good person but im not and the safe space geeky tif communities i like suck anyways whatever

Anonymous 116606

>Was cleaning, minding my own business
>favored cousin moid comes along
>asks me to pause due to the noise of cleaning, cause he wanted to film his car
>know if I refuse, he'll use male sadboy manipulation turning the whole family against me yet again, or indirect male violence
>manhate rises infinitely

also

>mom starts watching edgy moids livestreams

>she keeps talking about him daily, multiple times a day
>I give in and watch edgy moids content
>leave a disagreement thats not even mean
>moid bans me from chat, "jokingly" says I should be lined up against a wall and..
>mom still supports him, wants to donate, watches him to this day
>edgy moid threatens to rape women
>I express disgust at edgy moid
>mom says in a puppy dog sad voice, "aww, you dont like him? hes just being an alpha male"
>later comes out that edgy moid has p edo moderator, who bragged about getting away with crimes on a technicality
>mom says the evidence is made up, "he wouldnt be friends with someone like that"
>my own mother is more loyal to a random scrote who threatened her daughters life, than her daughter

Anonymous 116607

A while back I visited a friend of a friends place. Is it common for men still living at home to tell their senior moms that the pet left pee or stool in whereever place, hinting for his mom to clean it ? And then she did clean it. Like he was raised to think cleaning up stuff like that is below him, as if its for women to do.

Wonder why hes still single? This was a common occurrence whenever I hung out there.

Anonymous 116611

I want to kill myself. I am so done with being a pathetic worthless nobody at 29. Nobody fucking wants me I will never achieve a thing not even get married and have kids.

Anonymous 116612

just feeling really anxious all the time, really sick of it. idk what I'm doing with my life and I'm getting really fucking old and running out of time to figure it out. All my options make me want to die but I should pick something instead of nothing I guess

Anonymous 116613

>>116606
Your mother should kys

Anonymous 116615

>>116611
Why is a relationship and kids the be all end all? Aren't there any hobbies you want to git gud at? Aren't there things you're looking forward to like traveling or watching a new movie? If you really don't have anybody like not even family who would care if you died then why don't you just live for yourself? We'll all die sometime anyway. There's 30+ year old NEETs on here that find the will to live just to post about their yaois.

Anonymous 116618

1686185788085.jpg

Anons, I feel so broken. I have been caught in the same "loop" for possibly my whole life. Eating disorder, drug abuse, self loathing, with some waning periods of happiness or "I think I'm doing it, I think I'm digging myself out of the whole!" only to find myself mentally at "square one" within a month or two's time. I'm so sick of experimenting with prescriptions and lifestyles. I'm tired of always waking up feeling like I'm not as good as I could be right now, because I failed, and have failed my whole life. I feel like a disappointment to everyone around me. And, I feel like I need to stop caring about what other people in my life think about my changes and growth/recession. I feel so lost, and very unsure of whether or not what I'm doing is "the right thing". I think I'm going to kill this part of myself that wants to be "good" and "do the right thing" and revel in being a selfish, coldhearted bitch.

Anonymous 116620

MV5BMjY5MzM5NjM4OV…

My best friend died. His Mom keeps messaging me, my Mom, my uncle, my Dad, my other friend etc on different accounts and phone numbers blaming us, but particularly me, for her sons death. She called my previous workplace 3x and told them I was arrested for his murder.

She knocked at my neighbours door and asked for information about my activities and then accused me of having a party celebrating her son's death.

We keep blocking her and not replying but she pops up again somewhere else like whack-a-mole. She tries to show up when she knows I visit his grave (Friday at 6) and comes out of the car and starts shouting at me blaming me for his death and his granny trying to elicit pity from me (while berating me).

Not looking for advice just need to vent because it's very repetitive and means I have to be constantly vigilant when visiting him (which I travel a considerable distance to do). It's been going on for a year now.

Things have escalated since I accidentally convinced the coroner to have a jury due to severe police and doctor negligence (and cruelty) towards my beloved friend (thats a whole other post).

Anonymous 116621

I want to kill myself. I am so done with being a pathetic worthless nobody at 29. Nobody fucking wants me I will never achieve a thing not even get married and have kids. >>115513

Anonymous 116623

>>116621
Samefag, I got ghosted by two men in one day

Anonymous 116624

Would I do anything for him because I love him, or would I do anything for him to not abandon me? Is it both? I've bared my soul to him, and he's vowed to never leave or hurt me, and most of me believes it, sees it in his actions. But my own mother wants nothing to do with me, even after repeated attempts to reach out to her, and my ex promised plenty to not abandon or harm me either, while doing so repeatedly, so I'm left with this niggling fear that at any moment, he too will cast me aside.

Anonymous 116630

I think two of my best friends talked about me behind my back and I’m not sure what the best way to move forward with it is.

Today we had a brunch and they were talking about how last night, they had a venting session where they said everything mean they wanted to say about people they knew that they had been holding in. I asked them if they talked about me (not sure what possessed me to do that) and there was an awkward silence followed by one of them saying “are you crazy?? of course we wouldn’t, silly!!” Very unconvincingly. Like, I know her well and I think she’d say it a different way if it were true. I stayed silent and she followed up with “um, we only talked about the people we don’t like.” The other one just stayed silent on it. I let it go and changed the topic.

Should I try to completely let it go at this point? That’s what I’m leaning towards because I don’t think I’d get honesty if I pressed anyway. They are my best friends so I can’t afford to lose them. I think it’ll always be in the back of my mind moving forward with them, though.

Anonymous 116631

>>116623
ghosting is just part of the culture nowadays, getting ghosted isn't some sign that you're an unlikeable person or anything like that.

Anonymous 116632

>>116630
Honestly just be honest and say you didn't believe them and it sounded like they were lying, and how other friend stayed silent.

I would ask them if they did have any problems with me, and if they did to just tell me how they were feeling. Say it in a flowery way like
>You know I value your opinions and I don't want to do anything to cause you any discomfort through my actions and words!

But they absolutely talked shit about you, and it sounds like a triangulation type of three way friendship. You might just need to invest more in other friends and less in these two since they're too cowardly to tell you what they're feeling.

Anonymous 116633

I promised my nigel I would never leave him, no matter what, and I regret it. Now he does whatever he wants and it's clear he considers my threats empty. I know its his fault for taking advantage of me but I cant help but blame myself for saying and promising such a stupid thing

Anonymous 116635

>>116632
>You know I value your opinions and I don't want to do anything to cause you any discomfort through my actions and words!

Lmao, itayrt and it’s crazy you don’t even know us because that’s EXACTLY the way she (the one who lied to me) prefers to talk about anything. You’re right that if I want to address the issue while having a shot at maintaining the friendship, this is the approach I’d need to take.

Also I just googled what you meant by triangulation… ouch. now I’m only motivated to want to make things right because I don’t want to risk the friendship with the one who stayed silent.

Anonymous 116637

>>116635
Ayrt,
>now I’m only motivated to want to make things right because I don’t want to risk the friendship with the one who stayed silent.
It's hard to really give advice about this, but if two people in a three person group triangulate against the third, it's, from my experience, usually a sign of a relationship where the two individuals encourage each other's bad behavior. It probably feels good to them to direct all their negativity toward a third person. They probably are negative people with no other outlet to excise the negativity, and no real problems in their lives to focus on. All it take is for you to have one too many bad days than usual and to go to them to vent. These types of people most likely consider the act of providing a listening ear to a friend in need as "emotional labor" they are obligated to perform. If they feel too "obligated" to emotional duties, coupled with two negative people out of three, or one very negative person and one person who has a "follower" mentality, is all it takes for triangulation to start and resentment to form.

I'm not trying to put negative thoughts in your head, but genuinely think about expanding your support network and work on investing in other friends. Pick up some hobbies and meet like-minded people. With these unspoken social dynamics, it's hard to fix them with just asking about it.

Anonymous 116638

I don't care anymore. It absolutely makes me seethe how my ex and everyone else is having a better life than me and somehow I ended up cursed. How is it that everyone in my life (especially ex friends, that hurts the most) that wrongs me somehow levels up in their own life. Am I some kind of human embodiment of a button for success for other people once they step all over me?! I'm sick of it! Why is it illegal for someone to help you kill yourself. I'm ASKING FOR IT. I am giving them my consent. I don't know where to ask now that this one app I once made a deal on is gone forever. I should've went through with it. I'm such an idiot for thinking things might actually end up better. Dear past self, YOU'RE STILL MISERABLE. Where is my long haired man that will put a bullet in my skull while he holds me tightly to him after he let me sniff every part of him. This is such bullshit. I'm over it all.

Anonymous 116639

>>116633
Promises aren't spells, anon. Nothing happens if you break a promise. Don't make promises, make decisions that benefit you and change or discard whatever has stopped working for you. It's that simple.

Anonymous 116647

I've been thinking a lot about motherhood lately and have come to the realization that it might not be the best choice for me. I always thought I wanted to be a mother, especially because I love kids. But considering my mental health issues, which may never fully go away, it's probably best that I don't even try it. I'm afraid of the potential risks to myself and others during pregnancy and afterwards. Having a history of psychosis puts me at a higher risk for postpartum psychosis, it's so scary and I really don't want to take that chance. Plus I don't even think I like men on a fundamental level. Definitely not enough to endure the potential risks of pregnancy just to have their children.
Maybe I'll adopt. Or I'll start a goat farm like I've always wanted.

Anonymous 116648

something scary happened and it keeps flashing through my mind the whole day. i'm sitting in my bed watching minecraft videos, drowning it out until my brain forgets about it. will this work

Anonymous 116649

Knowing that I have to talk to people makes me want to throw up.

Anonymous 116654

>>116439
Samefagging because I still feel like shit about this. I'm just getting more and more annoyed and frustrated. I try really hard not to think about it, but it's been on my mind for most of the week. This was the first date I went on in like two years and I can't believe it was just as awful as the one I went on before then. If I throw in the towel forever, I don't want this to be my last experience but I'm feeling so demoralized and annoyed that it's hard to feel motivated to even want to talk to new people.

God and I'm annoyed too because I have a friend who wanted to hear all the date and then when I told her about what upset me about it she said, "I don't have much to say because I can't really relate." And that was fucking annoying too. Why do I even talk to people when most people are fucking emotionally retarded and it's a waste of my time?

Anonymous 116658

>>116594
update. been hiding in my room, havent eaten for almost a day to avoid seeing the creep. Still dont know if I should admit it was me who looked through stuff (to find if he took creepshots of me, didnt take anything) to the creep, and possibly put myself in danger, or continue to let the innocent person who has more power over the creep get the blame? Feels bad either way

>>116612
Im like this too, high anxiety and no idea what to pick either. Pick something related to something you enjoy doing?

Anonymous 116660

Was spending time out on the porch, finally in a relaxed mood, when sibling gets home, angry. He starts smacking his car mats hard against the support beams of the porch. He could have done that anywhere, or just not had a mantrum. Now I have dust particles floating around after I just did my hair and facial routine. WTF?

Turns out he was mad because people were rude to him (oh nooo, someone waved for him to go ahead! yes he thought that was rude), so now I have to be punished with the indirect threat of violence.

Why couldnt I just have had a sister, instead?

Anonymous 116663

>>116593
The way she self censors is fucking ridiculous
>"p 3 r 1 0 d"
>"r 4 p # d"
>"b. R. 4. S" ← trying to not type "breasts"
>"chest poke-y baby milk things"
This is a legal adult by the way, I wouldn't believe it but I've seen her driver's license (that she sent to me, an internet stranger, when I asked her for it)

Anonymous 116664

I've always been the put together sibling but I wish I could get high on something without my schizo issues coming out. It ain't fair I want a mental break. Mine comes with paranoid angry delusional voices so it would be the opposite of relaxing.

Anonymous 116665

1725864487932898.p…

A giant cockroach jumped on my shirt while I was throwing out the trash at work. I screamed and dropped the trash bag. Brown liquid spilled and I had to clean it up. It almost made me throw up. I think it was beer mixed with rancid coffee from Starbucks.

Anonymous 116667

I feel retarded being sad about it months later, but when I was at my most suicidal I vented about it too someone I thought I was a friend only for them to stop talking to me and then later tell me I had crossed a boundary as they were reminded about there own feelings about it. I had known them for a few years so that might be why I'm so broken up about it but sometimes I wonder If I was really in the wrong

Anonymous 116678

I'm becoming a genuine female incel. I hate men because I see it everywhere, women put up with men who all want the same type of woman, the world is too cucked sisters. Love isn't real. And this burning bitterness is ignoring all the male atrocities.

Anonymous 116679

well, well, well.J…

>>116543
I contacted the parent company of my apartment complex as well as the main office for the pest control company. Everyone should've been nice to me by doing their jobs. Instead I had to suffer through multiple breakdowns about this because nothing was getting done and fighting this on my own has been difficult. I even gave them time to fix their mistakes. They will feel my agony.

Anonymous 116680

>>116679
Samefag but my toilet also constantly messes up and leaks and I haven't been able to get it fixed because I don't want maintenance to also take fleas with him because I'm not an asshole. Its just been a terrible time lately. I hope everything can get resolved.

Anonymous 116681

>>116678
Based. Same, finally someone else whos not a "not my nigel/not all men" poster. although female incel implies its involuntary celibacy, when that only applies to scrotes, Idk what term to use.

I think Andrea Dworkin said most women dont want to acknowledge the reality of men, so they just deny or cope. But more women need to wake up and accept the horrific truth. The world and the internet needs to ramp up the manhate, by showing men for what they are, with their own words and actions. For example the case in France about the 71? year old moid who invited dozens of men to rape his passed out wife, who he drugged prior. None called for help, only 3 backed out. The rest committed rape, men from all walks of life and professions, married with kids, etc.

Wish more women were more open to discussing ways to deal with/protect ourselves from uppity scrotes that need knocking down a few pegs, so to speak.

Anonymous 116682

I finally started seeing someone I've been interested in for a long time. We know each other well already, since we've been friends for years. We started getting romantic last month, and last night we had sex for the first time. And he told me he's falling in love with me. And now all I want to do is undo everything and go back to being friends. I really felt confident that this was a good idea, but now I'm wishing we had never made the move away from the rapport we used to have. I feel pretty stupid.

Anonymous 116688

>>116681
ayrt, chilling. It's pure gaslighting when "not all men". I think male not all menners are 100% evil simple as, they never have good intentions wking for their fellow scrote. Anyways, you aren't alone nona. I can get why women want to delude themselves / succumb to wishful thinking but it's truly strange how no one is allowed to think about men as a collective when it is done for every single other group of people on the planet. Everyday all over the globe males go unchecked and it is depressing.

Anonymous 116691

i thought i wanted kids, but getting off my medication and seeing the extent of my mental illness is scaring me from that. i don't want to bring another being into this world to feel this way. i wish my mother felt the same.

Anonymous 116692

i relapsed self harming again… i feel useless. i still cut myself and my life is stagnant because of my mental issues while the people around me have prospects for the future and a life ahead of them. i've been trying to fix myself with medication, therapy… i don't know what else to do. nothing has changed and i became even more fucked up thanks to my doctor just shoving ssris down my throat even though i don't need them

Anonymous 116693

>>116692
what do you think you need instead of ssris? i've stopped them because they turned me into a zombie and now i feel better, but the reasons i started taking them in the first place are back and it's bad.

Anonymous 116694

>>116682
Avoidant attachment, nona?
I've been there. Nothing more repulsive than having the love of your life like you.

Anonymous 116697

>>116694
Wish I would have at least taken it slower, waiting longer before fucking. I think I just wanted this so badly that I lost my grip on being sensible, and went for it. Avoidant attachment might make sense. Even though I've liked him for so long, hearing the mention of love really threw me off. Would it come off as weird to you if someone said they were in love with you after the first time? Maybe I'm in the wrong here.

Anonymous 116699

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my art is so bad no matter how hard i try. i deleted social media since seeing good artists there sent me into near daily outbursts.

Anonymous 116700

>>116693
i am 99% sure i have adhd and feel depressed not because of my brain making me that way, but because of the fuckups over the years and domino effect of my adhdlike symptoms lowering my self esteem and making it harder to achieve things. i got an adhd assessment and am still waiting on results.

Anonymous 116704

1610561728104.jpg

Being a woman with dysphoria is literal hell. I keep getting depressive episodes, I keep waking up in tears, I keep wanting to explain to people why I hate performing femininity even though I am good at it. I have known I wanted to be a boy since I was a child but wasn't able to transition due to living in a very unsupportive place. I used to be mostly fine with being NB/non-conforming person but I am getting to the age where I should start getting into long-term relationships, but they are literally too painful for me. I am attracted to both men and women romantically, but when I am with men I hate how they just treat me like a woman and only think of fucking me and then treat me like I am their little toy. But I am not very sexually attracted to women and I do not think I could have a lasting relationship with another woman at least not the way I am right now.

I don't even have anyone to talk to this about, therapists are crazy expensive and I am too paranoid to tell any of my friends, they know I am a some flavor of LGBT but I do not want people to see me as a brain-washed woman or a "little soft boy uwu", I want to be a man or just pretend I dont exist.

Anonymous 116705

>>116704
Are you trying to bait the LC users again

Anonymous 116711

tumblr_29faab06800…

I have a problem where I project my anger and insecurities onto my sexual fetishes and maybe its the reason I'm unable to get laid.

Anonymous 116718

I've been befriending mostly men throughout my life to get the love my dad didn't give me. Now I'm finally disillusioned and understand they don't actually care. Like my dad, all they have to offer is superficial bullshit instead of genuine friendship, love and affection. I'm finally done, I'm free from the cycle. Now all I have to do is get over my anger toward them and arrive at total indifference. They don't deserve my emotions.

Anonymous 116719

I want to relive those youthful days with that friend and really enjoy myself this time.
I don't want that person in my life anymore because it would be pretty bad now. But that friendship and the times we had were good…I miss the feeling of possibility that remained during my early 20's. I'm undeniably in my late 20's now and my body doesn't feel nor look too different, but I know time has passed for me to experience the things I did.

I have money and independence now, yet it doesn't feel like it's true. And I found someone I can go on adventures with, but because I'm not truly free I'll likely be forced to cut them out if my life.

I can't be happy.

Anonymous 116722

this feels strange to say but i think i'm jealous of my boyfriend's friend group? they've all been friends since high school (4+ years minimum between them) and we've only been together for a few months. it's not even that i want to join their friend group, it's just a really weird feeling of being an outsider looking in. it doesn't help that i don't really have many friends of my own, and their group is pretty big

Anonymous 116723

Walls are already painted red, all I would do is add a little bit of texture

Anonymous 116725

i wouldnt wish the pain of being unemployed on my worst enemy. thanks to tfws and international students it is impossible to get even a shitty mcdonalds job in canada. how the fuck am i going to pay for my medication? burgerfags don't know how good they have it

Anonymous 116730

I wish my mother wasn't mentally ill so that maybe we could focus on actually having a proper mother and daughter relationship instead of me tiptoeing around her constant games of tit for tat and powerplay.
She invited me back to live with her here after my last relationship ended–and my ex fiance sued me for everything we shared–and now all she can do is use me living here to browbeat me into her submission. She threatens with kicking me out whenever I have a say against her illogical tantrums (not that she doesn't get her way) and then rubs in my face that I am only here because I have no where else to go when I don't profess an unwavering love and gratitude for the way she mistreats me.
She is correct that I am only here because I don't have a choice. No sane and happy person would ever willingly share a space with her, hence her divorces and zero friends. Even she knows at heart what her pride cannot admit nor work to change. Her only "friends" are her narcissistic brothers who she enables so they can soundboard their miseries off each other. She's abrasive, objectionable, negative, and in spite of posturing like she has very high standards…holds herself to none and is boring af. She glues herself to the couch and tv everyday then blames me for not making creative little outings for her (that she bitches the whole way about when I do) or otherwise providing her entertainment and company (which is her rambling about the past and talking shit about my father figures and how she is the victim). Heaven forbid I'm idle and not behaving like her servant such as going to buy her groceries and cleaning products or performing house chores. She's angry that I dare occupy any of her house, cannot even tolerate that I use the kitchen to cook for myself (and always clean up after myself or else) and have a container of leftovers among her shit in the fridge. She barges into my room to comment on how unlcean she thinks it is despite me cleaning every fucking week on top of me having a full time job while she is retired and can obsess over every fingerprint I leave behind.
But above all I'm sick of the way she fucking talks to me and then DARVOs when the day comes where I cannot mentally tolerate her insane bullshit–and not even that I scream or am mean back to her, just stating that she is being petty and ridiculous.
But of course, when I say anything back, it's suddenly I never do anything for her and never have. I'm so ungrateful. I never help her out.
Fuck you bitch, if you're going to boil it down to this every time I don't completely kiss your ass then why should I even try? Go get your fucknut brothers to go buy you soups, and yogurts, and call your dental office when you develop an infection from your rotten teeth falling out of your skull due to your shit diet and chainsmoking like what happened a fucking week ago. Go get your fucknut brothers to help you out and entertain you–oh wait, they won't because they're just as selfish as you are! There, satisfied? No??? Then treat me like your flesh and blood for a fucking change and stop treating me like a tyrant.

…She'll never change and this is who she will be forever. I won't ever truly have a mom. Just some antagonistic biddy who constantly projects and gets her way because no one has or will ever physically kick her ass. And even when she is weak and vulnerable, there will be people like me around to help her still, without question or criticism, because there are few in the world who would ever match her cruelty.
Terrible and awful. The best thing she could do for me is die.

Anonymous 116731

>>116725
Living in Canada sucks, there's too many people here nowadays and youre right about the lack of job opportunities, i sent in my application to a starbucks and they didn't even phone back

Anonymous 116734

I've got it bad for a girl in a discord server. She's posted face so I know she's not a tranny (I know I'd be able to tell anyway, she's big into cute things, shojo, lolita etc) She's so adorable and funny. I wish I wasn't an ugly, painfully boring loser an ocean apart from her

Anonymous 116735

My roommate disgusts me. She is fat, is always eating sugary slop. She has even had meals that were nothing but things like cake and a coke. I often find her laying on the couch like a beached whale. I don't get how she doesn't worry about becoming diabetic with the amount of sugar she consumes. She also keeps using my utensils and plates and can't wash them properly. There is often still grease or food particles left unwashed.

Anonymous 116737

>>116731
i managed to get an interview with starbucks but got a rejection email today. at this point it's not even my fault i'm a borderline neet i've been applying to positions for almost a year now

Anonymous 116738

I have to worst lopsided tits one of my areolas keeps popping out of my cups

Anonymous 116739

Kind of feeling that I should break up with my boyfriend but my relationship with my family is fucked and I’ve enmeshed myself with his family and he’s spent a lot of money getting me out of my mental illness hole/abuse situation so I’m staying part of me thinks I’ve just gone off this temporarily but the whole relationship depresses me. I was away seeing family last month for a while and we were calling regularly and I was excited to see him and he was talking about taking me on a break to the country but he’s so disorganised none of it happened and since I got back I’ve been staying with him and his family until I move to my own place later this week but it’s just been awful and his family is either lazy or always fighting so I’m left just awkward or always cleaning up which I’m happy to do but not most of it. We used to go out and do stuff together but now he plays games most of the time if he’s not working and though he makes good money for a guy his age I find him so boring and like unambitious and not spontaneous like I don’t understand how he can waste his youth like that. I know im being a shit person complaining and not doing anything but I don’t care. Past year has been shit and left me jaded and I have little respect for myself left. Since I came back from abroad I’ve been disassociating when we have sex and just trying to maintain all my relationships so I’m not alone but also being destroyed by it. I don’t feel attracted to him anymore and I feel limited I feel like I’m young and beautiful why am I hanging around for this but I know I’m a coward so it makes sense. Fml I’m a dickhead.

Anonymous 116742

i am so bored out of my mind
i want school to start. i want to feel alive and do things differently than my regular day to day life. i feel free and bored and anxious

Anonymous 116745

>Feels bad
>Looks up AI therapy
>Creates account
>Begins chatting
>Surprisingly realistic, going well
>Mentions I’m a CSA victim
>Account immediately suspended

Anonymous 116748

>>116691
youre going to have rebound symptoms but professionals wont tell you that

Anonymous 116762

I'm a disgusting human being. I deserve to die but I won't kill myself, I don't want God to punish me with my loved ones

Anonymous 116763

>>116762
i used to feel like this when i was younger but the older i got, it got a little better i think

Anonymous 116765

>>115513
I don't care about being evil anymore. I want to be full blown evil. My disgust with men is too much to bear so i dont care anymore about morals or what is right or wrong. I am 38 years old and I've struggled my whole life with inner turmoil. In the end this is how i really feel. It took 38 years to realize it. Men are a waste of space and time and mental resources. They are sheer filth.

Anonymous 116766

>>115638
Cut all their dicks off and put them in blenders.

Anonymous 116773

platoscave.jpeg

>>116460
i'll check it out. i haven't really watched any media or podcasts on cults so i think it'd be interesting. i also imagine, we all kind of participate in cult-like behavior from time to time.

to further expand on this idea of cults, i've been thinking a lot about plato's allegory of the cave and the use of "allegorical thinking", or the use of a compelling story, in cults. for example, heavens gate. people actually committed suicide because they believed in things like UFOs and aliens and that there was an afterlife. they did this because, well, other people thought so, and isn't it interesting to think? but it's not real, it's a story made up by someone who probably was very mentally ill and schizophrenic. the members believed it because they were lonely and wanted community even if none of it was real.

chase complexity. feel things that hurt. don't think that shadows on the wall and boogeymen are actually "real," because it's not. you will never understand the whole of life and that's what makes people feel alive.

Anonymous 116774

It's incredible how people can't recognize their own behavior but are quick to judge others, even when its the same exact behaviour

Anonymous 116776

>>116730
I also wish my mother was normal. I was at a shop recently and thought about telling her because everything there was cheap and she loved a good deal.

I long for a normal mother/daughter bing but being around her is never as good as it seems in my head. I wish I had a sister or a friend. The last “friends” I had all wanted to use me for homework help. Literally only messaged me/called me to get help with an assignment.

Anonymous 116782

IMG_8004.jpeg

My headphones broke and I started full on sobbing. They were a birthday gift from my mom and I have no money to replace them and I'm just a month out of warranty. I can't afford new ones and music is the only thing that makes me happy and the noise cancellation helps me calm down because my home is so noisy. i don't know how i'm going to survive the semester without them. I have no job, no friends, no relationships, no looks literally nothing right now and am severely depressed. My dad stole money from me too which I couldve used to buy another pair. I have been endlessly applying to hundreds of jobs just to have a little savings for moments like these but I never ever get callbacks. Music is the only thing keeping me sane and I listen to it for hours on end everyday. I'm hyperventilating and I started scream crying and can't calm down. It's like a tower of dominos and this was just the cherry on top. I don't care how autistic I sound this really hurts so fucking bad because they were so expensive and had amazing sound quality and they help me get through hard shit like chores and studying. I keep messing up endlessly and I just wish things could be better

Anonymous 116783

>>116571
Bisexualism is a thing. Maybe you're not even that, attraction can just be weird sometimes.

Anonymous 116786

>>116412
>>116421
if this isn't larp you and your disgusting pedo bf should kys

Anonymous 116787

I dumped a guy when I found out he wasn't a virgin, which sucks, because he was pretty much perfect in every other way.

Anonymous 116788

>>116787
>pretty much perfect in every other way
what was he like?

Anonymous 116789

I wish I can be a better person than I am now

Anonymous 116791

>>116412
You're spineless with extremely low self-esteem. You sound like my mother and I hate what her terrible choices did to me and my brother. If you have any semblance of love for your potential children, do not reproduce with this man. His genes are tainted. Do not have children with anyone until you get a grip. Seriously. Wake up.

Anonymous 116793

IMG_7201.jpeg

>>116782
Update for nonas i'm feeling better now kek got some superglue and they work like a charm. Last night my headphones were broken I got a video reccomended to me on how using music and podcasts as escapism doesn't help and you need to be alone with your thoughts sometimes. It felt like a divine message. I might just be schizo but i'm glad I watched it and i'm sappy now

Anonymous 116795

27892588._SY540_.p…

>am straight
>In a heterosexual relationship
>Enjoys lesbian media
>Is very annoyed by hetero women taking up space in lesbian spaces

I pretty much hate men and hate the fact that I'm straight but am very thankful I found a mostly good Nigel. Because of my dislike in general for men I really only enjoy sapphic relationships in fiction or with men who are basically perfect shining knights that don't exist irl.

Anyway it irks me to high heaven that women who have similar feelings to me claim to be queer and take up space in lesbian settings. It also makes me mad when people assume I'm trad or anti queer irl because I don't go to pride events or claim to be somewhere on the lgb spectrum. Please leave lesbian women alone JFC.

Anonymous 116798

HS teacher I haven't seen in years came in to work yesterday. Sounds like he's changing banks so I may have to see him regularly now. He's a creep who would try to look down your blouse if you sat in the front row, and it doesn't feel like he's changed one bit. I'm dreading that he'll keep trying to strike up conversations.

Anonymous 116799

saw my therapist yesterday and i think im coming to terms with how traumatic a lot of my upbringing was. it makes me very, very resentful towards my parents because of how it actively fucks with my friendships/relationship now. i know it's just something i have to live with and not run away from, but it makes me so upset. having two people who are supposed to protect you hurt you in wildly different ways (neglect in one direction and smothering in another) has left me as such a mess. i will isolate myself but find myself feeling incredibly lonely. i'll have opportunities to make new friends but won't follow up on plans because i don't care enough to actually put in the work. again, i need to just live with certain parts of myself and what's happened to me over the years, but i fucking hate the way it has affected me.

Anonymous 116812

>>116795
Try being less mad

Anonymous 116813

IMG_2913.jpeg

had a crush on a male teacher when I was young. god decided he hated me enough to put us working together at the same uni job now that I am an adult. he is too nice and respectful…..

Anonymous 116814

>>116813
You HAD a crush, right?

Anonymous 116825

IMG_9283.jpeg

Nothing has gotten better. I guess it's a 50/50 chance when you hope it'll be better when time goes on. I happened to get the bad side of the coin once again. My husbandos and parasocial relationships aren't able to heal me this time. It's getting dark.

Anonymous 116828

IMG_2916.jpeg

>>116814
:( I had one, forgot about it and moved on with my life. Now that I have to see him everyday… its honestly horrible.

Anonymous 116830

>>116679
>>116680
Some updates:
- I got my toilet fixed.
- The office lady wants to do a walk-thru sometime this week which I don't even know why because if she comes inside wearing pants there's a huge chance she's going to take some with her. I hope she comes wearing protection. I'm assuming she thinks we are keeping a pet.
- I got a free spray and I got the guy who came the first time around, lol. He was upset because apparently my complaint made him look bad. Fire your useless employees and I wouldn't have had to contact HQ! Idiot. He did a fantastic job though. Bad news is he said someone else will be replacing him in his position.

Fuck. This is going to take so long, anons. I'm losing hope and I'm exhausted. I just want a normal home again. It's so violating and mentally draining especially when you have OCD.

Anonymous 116831

>>116830
I forgot to add that he lost weight from the last time I saw him and he cut his hair. He no longer looks like John Denver. I have no urge to molest him anymore.

Anonymous 116834

How do I stop being so anxious for no reason? It’s gotten to the point where I get nervous when I drive to my college. It’s not even a hard drive since I live less than half an hour away, yet I still find my hands shaking and my heart beating faster. My nerves spike up when I reach the school parking lot too since I suck at parking and I always overthink it, and I worry that the students in the parking lot are judging me somehow. I’m almost 22 years old, I should be over this by now.

Anonymous 116837

>>116834
It's never for no reason. You have unresolved trauma or something in your life is stressing you out and your body knows it. Don't ignore it and especially don't medicate it away. Make changes. Also it's "normal" to be anxious (and depressed) in these living conditions, there's nothing wrong with you.

Anonymous 116841

1726513743547.jpg

I have no idea how to relate with fellow students, what do they even do with their life? their days? their friends? all I can do is try and be autistic about studying and help whoever comes by way, but seems like no one really cares about that anyway, they just want to have some fun, and I'm missing out
plus that makes me lose all my motivation and in the end, I feel like I'll be the only one to fail, because even as they all do the bare minimum, at least they've got something to look forward to, while I'm just trying to fill the void, until I give up and spend weeks sheltered at home not going to class, halfly dropping out and binging on whatever imageboards send my way, just to keep the suicidal thoughts away
I don't think I'll ever make a single friend, everyone singled me out already, I think I'm just paranoid and victimizing as well, I figure everyone goes through this endless stream of social euphoria, while I lament myself and have only myself to blame
everyone looks so clean and proper, perfectly bland and easy-going, I feel so ugly all the time I try to hide myself most of time
trying to go back to school has really messed with me

Anonymous 116856

not sure if this is too much for this thread. couldn't find a better thread. i can't take it anymore i want a close female friend so badly. approaching 6 years without one. i am not social nor extroverted yet i cannot shake this truth. i don't even know how to connect with other women ONLINE anymore let alone in person. my thoughts become more and more disorganized without someone non-male to talk to on a deeper level which consequently reduces the possibility of someone ever wanting to befriend me organically. i've tried various sidejobs, i lived in a large college city, i hung out with coworkers outside of work, i did all the right things and it was all fruitless. i just want someone to rely on, i want someone to listen to, i want to be there for someone, i want to give hugs, i want a female presence that feels natural again, i want the closeness and i miss the platonic cuddling. i feel like an alien. i feel creepy and i think girls think i'm creepy. i'm only going to seem creepier as the years go by. i'm already battling mental disorganization and delusions at 20. who knows how senile i'll appear in 5yrs. will i even be able to form a sentence.. this is such a lonely disorder.

Anonymous 116858

IMG_9317.jpeg

I was hoping for this job I applied to in the summer so I could buy what I need to kms and to be able to splurge on my favorite fastslop the night before I do it. But the building still hasn't been set up and people online are speculating it's not coming after all.. FUCK OFF. Why even post the listing. Now I have to wait for something else to pop up because there's nothing except stupid shit that I have no knowledge about. Why tease me like this for months. I hate everything.

Anonymous 116861

I'm tired of trying to attract friends, I've given up. I prefer to meet people organically, through chance encounters or fateful encounters.
I'm not going out of my way to meet new people anymore.

Anonymous 116862

>>116861
i feel the same way, is this organic enough lol. would you want a friend from here



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