[ Rules / FAQ ] [ meta / b / media / img / feels / hb / x ]

/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

*Text* => Text

**Text** => Text

***Text*** => Text

[spoiler]Text[/spoiler] => Text

Direct Link
Options NSFW image
Sage (thread won't be bumped)

Check the Catalog before making a new thread.
Do not respond to maleposters. See Rule 7.
Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021


tfw no bf #4 Anonymous 18677

Old thread ran out of posts:
If you specifically desire a shy bf, this thread also exists now:

Anonymous 18678

>see guy with cute profile pic of him in youtube comments
>1 subscriber
>deduce that he likes piano music and owns chickens
>consider commenting on one of his 3 videos to get in contact
I wouldn't but…the temptation. I feel lonely.

Anonymous 18679

Do it!

Anonymous 18680

It’s winter break now but I am so sick of all these gd guys at school essentially ghosting me
I thought I met the perfect guy in my calc lecture and he just hit all the right spots for me
I invited him to go with me to a local event and we had a great time ending with us making out and strolling our city late night
>tfw finally going to have my bf
>excited to have someone to send cute texts and snaps too over break
Instantly starts ghosting me

Anonymous 18681

I don't really want a boyfriend anymore. I don't know if I am ready to live with someone, go on dates, kiss etc. Just having a really close friend who would let me hug them and watch anime with them is more than enough.

Anonymous 18682

I didn't manage to snag a bf or make any friends in college.
Now I'm panicking because I have nowhere to get bf or friends from.

I want to go back.

Anonymous 18731

You don't have to move in with them just cause you're dating them. In fact I think it's better to not do that personally, I tried and ended up moving back in with my parents because it's a lot of unnecessary relationship stress if you have other roommates and also have all the money stress of being a married couple sharing living expenses but without actually being married.

Anonymous 18733

They were probably just teasing him.

Anonymous 18738

Bunty - screenshot…

Oh, I thought replies to my post would be over since the thread maxxed out and I didn't want to make it awkward by carrying it over here.
I think she may have genuinely been into him, since she's friends with a cute-but-frumpily-dressed obviously autistic girl, a tall obese girl, and one other artsy Stacey.
And to answer >>18522 at long last, I'd rate myself a 5 without makeup but 6 on a good day with makeup. I only wear eyeliner+mascara since I hate the feeling of foundation, sorry.
For reference my face is proportioned and shaped very much like pic related although with dark eyes and hair and a wider nose.
I've had very little luck with men.

Anonymous 18740


tfw no big nosed bf to make you feel better about your own face mounted spear

Anonymous 18743

I think you fell for the oldest trick in the book to be honest.

>Walk up to the class nerd and start flirting with him / ask him out, then laugh when he drops his spaghetti

Used to do that a lot in middle school.

Anonymous 18744

>used to do that a lot
You mean it was done to you? If you did it yourself that's awful, anon.
I have had guys try to do that, as well as girls approach to "befriend" me in middle-high school but never fell for it because the tone of voice always gave it away.
She didn't have this tone though, and we're adults. would you say she's just an outlier then? Are most high-tier women more superficial?

I also always go after men who are short and/or scrawny with unique faces since I think we're brothers in arms and find interesting looks more attractive, but it seems they are always taken or reject me. I'd think that wouldn't be so if Stacey types were more picky.

Anonymous 18745


God, I just want a big (chubby or buff) boyfriend to cuddle with and hug. I'm so fucking lonely.

Anonymous 18749

>I've had very little luck with men
It makes sense, because you're extremely rude and judgemental.

Anonymous 18753

Rude, how so? Although admittedly I do interact cautiously with good looking people, I doubt it bothers them. Wouldn't say it's rude. I don't insult anyone in real life or anything, and clearly I don't personally see average to below average people as lesser since we're on the same team.
It's just a fact that there is a social hierarchy based on looks as well as charisma, of which I have neither quite frankly kek. It's also a fact that there are clearly defined conventional tastes, whether you or I personally agree with them.

In my OP I was just having a bit of stress over women far above my "level" being into men of my "level" since it means I'm shit out of luck. Who can I date if all men will just trade me out when the chance arises? I have a lot of affection, future money, and companionship to offer but I know men weigh perfect looks as most important and if the offer comes…why say no? Why would he stay with wide-nose-acne-bitch if he can get the other benefits with a nicer package? I don't understand it personally but know men are different than us.

Maybe I am judgemental, but aren't we all? It's human shit.

Anonymous 18755

I mean, you just called a girl autistic but that's not really the point. Even though you act cautiously with people in real life and not like on imageboards, you might slip or people who are more… aware could see beyond that. Idk how you are in real life but I'm talking the vibe you give off here.

Anonymous 18756

Alright, I highly suspect she's on the spectrum due to how she expresses herself and the way that she carries herself (shouting things in class that were socially off-tune, monotone voice, always walks on tip toes). Nothing wrong with being autistic but it does upset most people to interact with others who can't read social cues. I don't think that's right but it's how it is, and it makes a case for the other girl I mentioned being accepting of others.

As for your main point…maybe. I'm calling this potentially autistic girl out here but tbh I have shit social skills myself and no charisma, so maybe people do pick up on me being a secret asshole. But it just seems like everyone is even more judgemental than me, hence why I've come to navigate the world this way. If I change I'll just become susceptible to getting hurt.

Anonymous 18758

Good looking people tend to be way nicer!

Anonymous 18759

>posts about potential partner
>uses a big ass Goron as reference
I may know why Stacy has the edge over you

Anonymous 18764


Its over. No guy would want to date now.

Anonymous 18765

Approach men you fool.

Anonymous 18766

men 2018.webm

approaches man
man runs away terrified

stacies ruined men for the rest of us

Anonymous 18767

That was painful to watch

Anonymous 18769


Try not to start choking either.

Anonymous 18771

That article has been retracted.
>This article and its headline originally stated that a male student at the University of Missouri was found in violation of Title IX because he asked a female student on a date and “was perceived as having power over her.” The article accurately quoted the deposition of the Title IX case, but it left out relevant details. In fact, the male student had made repeated, unwelcome advances toward the female student and was found in violation of Title IX for stalking her. He is suing the university and alleging that its Title IX office engaged in arbitrary enforcement and racial discrimination, but his lawsuit does not contest the fact pattern left out of this article. We are retracting the article and we regret the error. The article, including the initial editor’s note, is below.

tl;dr he was actually stalking her a lot and the news articles conveniently left that out because this looked like a good story on its own.

Anonymous 18773

I see. I'll have to learn not to trust or get upset by media outlets again.

Anonymous 18784

What the fuck is going on here? I'm genuinely curious ahahahaha

Anonymous 18786

How do I approach guys?

Anonymous 18788

The anons attacking you are clearly just jealous
Theres nothing wrong with using the term autistic to describe traits
And you seem very pretty don’t get discouraged
Your looks from what you described definitely outshine mine
But you’re right that men trade up to a Stacey at any chance
I’ve had a boyfriend of 3 years and although we are both pretty average people I have terrible nightmares of him cheating on me with hot girls
If some girl like Ariana grande asked your boyfriend to cheat he most definitely will
Makes me feel so depressed

Anonymous 18789

The man was previously accused of sexual harassment when he put his arm around another announcer or something, and it led to a lot of media reports and stuff.

Anonymous 18791

I wish I had a bf
but all guys that approach me are ugly

Anonymous 18807


Same. I would rather be alone than go out with a guy who has absolutely nothing going for him. Looks are the bare minimum. Even certain guys with unattractive features can get away with it if they groom themselves to look respectable or stylish.

Anonymous 18827

>i have a story of an attractive person happily asking out an ugly partner
>somehow this is evidence that i will never be able to get a boyfriend due to being ugly
stop being so negative anon
you should look at that story of stacey and ugly-boy as encouraging

Anonymous 18829

wow I want an qt 2d lawyer bf now

Anonymous 18831

>guys that approach me
A-are you a Stacy?

Anonymous 18883

I hate how easily attached I get to very specific people. I have a oneitis I've been trying to get over but it's hard. He's a very sweet and intelligent person, but he just doesn't want to date anyone. Previously I found that the only way to get over a guy was to find his faults or find somebody else but I genuinely can't fault this man. He's the person I care about the most in my life and he's done absolutely nothing wrong. Getting rejected hurts more than being dumped to me.

Anonymous 18884

>weigh 180 lbs at 5'4
>become 110 lbs
>try to dress more fashionable because I'm more confident
Guys hit on me monthly now it's easy. Men are simple. The guys who hit on me aren't ones I want to date though, most of them seem sleazy and sex-obsessed.

Anonymous 18885

I kind of ended up in the situation you seem to want and eventually a lot of problems showed up. Apparently I don't feel I'm enough to have a partner, I'm 100% convinced it's not for me even though I crave it so much. So, I get close to people and try to become their close friend and have this platonic relationship where we hug or occasionally say cute things to each other. The problem is, I still secretly, subconsciously, or whatever-ly, want the 'benefits' of an actual romantic relationship. So I try to ask for more attention and love in a subtle way. But of course the other person only wants me as a friend and wont go that far. Then I start getting jealous and try to guilt trip the person and it all goes to hell. Summing up, be careful what you wish for, maybe once you get that 'friend' you'll want more but they wont and you wont want to lose them and everything will hurt so much

Anonymous 18977


You ARE going to have a boyfriend by 2020 right cc?

Anonymous 18985

Has he outright stated he doesn't want to date, or is he just reserved? I know a couple guys like that, might be a combination of low self-worth or inexperience with relationships.

Anonymous 19017

It's my resolution!!!
I will probably fail, although I got a date once in 2018 so I'm getting there.

Anonymous 19018

I don't want a bf any more.
I'm too bitter to have a bf. I wouldn't be comfortable with a person who isn't a mentally ill, jaded piece of shit like me. I don't even want to get better.

I have to put all of this effort to become normal just so I can be "good enough" for someone? I doubt they'd appreciate it, they'd probably look down on me for struggling with things others do effortlessly. I hate normal and happy people, they can go to hell.

Anonymous 19019

Get a NEET robot bf then? There are a lot of angry depressed men out there.

Anonymous 19020

When you hate yourself, why would you want to be with someone who is like yourself?

I think one jaded bitter asshole in my life is already one too many, I don't need a second one.

Anonymous 19021

oh. that sounds like me.

Anonymous 19022

>I have to put all of this effort to become normal just so I can be "good enough" for someone? I doubt they'd appreciate it.
Yeah no one owes you anything for getting yourself in order. But if you find a good guy he'll have empathy for whatever you're facing when you are with him.

Anonymous 19023

>But if you find a good guy he'll have empathy for whatever you're facing when you are with him.
Yeah right.

What was the saying? "Don't stick your dick in crazy". No man wants a mentally ill girl as a gf. In fact, a "good guy" is more likely to dump you, because why would a good guy waste time on you, when he can get himself a good girl?

Garbage people attract other garbage people with low standards. I wish I got hit by a bus, but I'd have to go outside for that to happen.

Anonymous 19028

I meant after you pull it together a bit.

Anonymous 19029

Anonymous 19035

I wish anyone would approach me

Anonymous 19046

Lucky. Tiny weens are so cute.
>tfw no kind, small pengis bf

Anonymous 19048

NTA but, garbage taste tbh. Bigg dicc on an otherwise smol and cute boy is to die for.

Anonymous 19049

Why do you all want to choke when giving oral? I would prefer no pain or humiliation during sex but that's just me.
Small men are patrician taste though.

Anonymous 19050

>choke when giving oral
Who said anything about that? It's not like you have to fit the whole thing in your mouth anyway. You have hands for a reason.
>pain or humiliation
I'll admit pain is sometimes and issue, but I don't see how humiliation has anything to do with dick size. Unless you've got some weird complex where you find any little difficulty humiliating.

Anonymous 19051


Thankfully now that we can actually choose who we are with dicklets will be finally erased from gene pool.

Anonymous 19052

Sadly for you, girls like us will keep the cute dick gene spreading :3

Anonymous 19053

But I need to be able to fit it in my mouth if I want to pull off the lifting-the-boy-while-giving-bj move.
I guess generally it just wouldn't benefit me, so I can't understand. I don't have fantasies of "being filled" as I've seen other women say and can cum easily from minimal penetration so there's no greater appeal. For women who are into that and/or can't orgasm unless from a large benis I guess I understand a preference.
Damn right.

Anonymous 19054

I don't know about that, there'll always be girls that don't care or prefer smaller and there's always someone on the wrong end of the bell curve.

Your preference will never not perplex me.

Anonymous 19055

Let me guess tiny is 6" for you.

Anonymous 19056

>I want to pull off the lifting-the-boy-while-giving-bj move.
Maybe you shouldn't want that, proper taste is a good old fashioned bj.

Anonymous 19057

I dunno. Walk towards them, slap them on the ass and ask if he want's to be your bottom bitch or something like that.

Might work.

Anonymous 19059

Just use this script
>Hey <his name>, wanna go bowling Friday night? They're doing a 2 for 1 deal on nacho platters.
Obviously replace the <his name> with his actual name, but like the name he goes by and not the literal words "his actual name". You get me?

Anonymous 19062

Deepthroat is just such a dumb porn meme.
The tip is where the penis is sensitive. Tongue work is everything.

Anonymous 19063


Literally tried this once. His response: "Sure! Who else is coming?"

Anonymous 19064


Just play with your hair and giggle at everything like you're a brain dead Stacey

Anonymous 19065

He's outright stated that we should just be friends and that he's probably just going to stay living the bachelor life. I can't blame him for not wanting to date me. I live in a different state and have no career.

Anonymous 19066

Can't tell if this was written by a robot troll trying to reinforce stereotypes about us.

Anonymous 19067


It's a robot

Anonymous 19068

And? Did you just give up because of his autism or did you tell him it's a date?

Anonymous 19069


I said I didn't know yet and then we invited the rest of our friends

Anonymous 19070

You dug your own grave then.

Anonymous 19071

why would you assume otherwise?
And short is 5'4" or less.
>she thinks objectively good taste exists

Anonymous 19072


So what do I do now? ;_;

Anonymous 19073

Invite him to something else except just you and him.
Try ice skating or mini golf. Or just invite him to a sit-down restaurant. Not fast food and not a fancy dress-up place though.
If he asks you who else is coming, just say "just you and me ;)". Winky face is mandatory.

Anonymous 19078

Then you remind him it's TWO FOR ONE nachos and call him a big dummy

Anonymous 19080


Just date a girl or something, what you are describing is not a man

Anonymous 19081

Men equal to or shorter than 5'4" are less than 5% of the population (in my country), but they exist. And a small penis doesn't mean no penis.
You okay? No one is forcing you to date them.
I should clarify I wouldn't dump a man for having a regular or big dick if we got along and he was otherwise small/cute to me. It's fine, although not preferable.

Anonymous 19082

Also looks like op's post complaining about small dicks was deleted, weird.
Was it bait/LARP or what?

Anonymous 19091

Pretty much, it was along the lines of "Why do all the nice boys have to have small penises, I'm tired of being disappointed"

Anonymous 19092

How is that different than half the posts here?

Anonymous 19100


>tfw no nice weeb gf to watch cute slice of life anime while cuddling

Anonymous 19101

anime sux

Anonymous 19103


Anonymous 19133


If i encountered a male with my hobbies and lifestyle we won't even started talking, because it's too awkward and tiresome.

If i met a male with ideal body, strong jawline, who suddenly decided to hit on me i whould think i'm getting pranked.

If i met a male, who wants to pay for me i whould be insulted.

etc, etc

As a result in last several weekends all imagined situations, where i encountered a somehow or fully ideal bf were failed.

Anonymous 19134

why are you avataring with this animu girl

Anonymous 19135

Well if you ask me "why" then i could say, that i find her image motivating. In animu "Kemono Friends", she is a grey wolf-like human, made for educational purposes and unlike other "friends" she developed a skill in drawing. Aquiring this skill even for modern humans is hard, not to mention beastgirls, who are somehow dumber than… i like wolfs and that's it.

Anonymous 19138


she cute

Anonymous 19139

I'm afraid now that even if I do get a bf he'll be a pedo/a necrophile/non-committal.
I've read too many stories of shit men and realize they all may be that way.

Anonymous 19140

One of my nightmares is dating a feteshist.

Imagine, a normal-looking bf, who suddenly asks to lick your feet or something like that.


Anonymous 19141

I mean, that's personally fine with me. It's just the morally reprehensible stuff and abandonment that get to me.
Sexually incompatible (he turns out to be a dom) would be disappointing but not as awful as if he was into fucking dead bodies of children.

Anonymous 19142

> if he was into fucking dead bodies of children
Than he probably won't date a living mature girl or something

Anonymous 19143

There are definitely pedos who get married though (and molest their kids).
Not sure about necrophiles but I imagine if it's not their sole fetish it happens.

Anonymous 19144

samurai logic.webm

> some men want to get married just to molest their own daughter/son
Sometimes i envy lesbians

Anonymous 19145

Is there a fetish of respecting and acknowledging women?

Anonymous 19147

It's called "being gay"

Anonymous 19150

lmao do you have any idea how misogynist the average gay is

Anonymous 19152

Retard radfems pls go

Anonymous 19154

Nice paranoia sisters, get help

Anonymous 19157

Hello gay male

Anonymous 19158

>lmao do you have any idea how misogynist the average gay is
This. Holy shit. Supportive "gurlfriend" gay guy is a complete Hollywood meme.

Anonymous 19159

>back at uni
>tfw in the vicinity of tiny men daily but still none to wrap my arms around
Another few months of temptation, lasses. Back to staring at them on the bus and making them uncomfortable.

Anonymous 19160

I’m here to encourage you all - it can happen!
I was the band nerd valedictorian never been kissed girl who went to a Seven Sister surrounded by ultra-mega-turbo Stacies.
After first year I told my mom to accept that I was going to die unmarried and childless.
Then two girls I barely knew did the whole
“It’s Friday! You’re coming for pizza and we won’t take no for an answer!”
And this guy just - started talking to me. Tall, deep voice (oh, god, his voice. I have seen women tell him they’d marry him just to hear him say ‘good morning’ every day), broad shoulders, black hair, green eyes…..
I was sure it was a joke.
Knew it had to be a prank.
Especially when he gave me a business card.
But the girls with me pestered me until I called, he answered, he asked me out.
3 years ago and a few months. We’ll be married 1 year next month. Baby coming in May.
Never give up hope

Anonymous 19161

But anon, if they're tiny that means they can't fight back.

Anonymous 19163


Guy detected

Anonymous 19170

That's probably why they get uncomfortable tbh. I am a sturdy gal.
Although I may have a chance to make contact with one I was eying last semester since he's in my psych elective. He's very cute, a serious little man who is always alone (like me). I think we give off similar vibes actually.
I think normie and sub women get turned on by fear, and some dommes like the idea of having a Big Boy to control.
To each their own.

Anonymous 19208

am i a normie for liking chubby/average guys that watch superhero movies, play ps4 and have a decent car? or do i just have normie taste?

Anonymous 19211

i'm 23 and there's this guy i work with and he's super cute, kind of fat but in a cute way and a handsome face. but he's 19… we talk every day and he make's me so happy that i actually like working but i don't know if he would ever want to date an older girl. anyone else know this feel?

Anonymous 19213

>kind of fat but in a cute way
lol what does that even mean, being fat is never cute on males. unless hes actively working out then dont bother with him

Anonymous 19214

>being fat is never cute on males
Are you trying to imply it is cute on women?

Anonymous 19217

>he make's me so happy that i actually like working
This is cute. I get what you mean but maybe he's one of those guys who don't mind a small age difference?

Oh shut up, LARPer.

Anonymous 19238

thats not true at all, lots of men have a saviour complex and will want to try and fix you. thats also not good for you but still, its something.

Anonymous 19239

Its all about the setting. Go to a place where guys who would share your hobbies go and try to start talking to them about it. From there just let the conversation flow and laugh at the dumb jokes.
Plenty of guys are into that tbh. Just don't try to stab him and your copacetic.

Anonymous 19288

Past 18, 4 years is like nothing regardless of who's older, as long as the age difference doesn't mean one of you would have to move away for college or some other reason like that.

Anonymous 19289

The age difference isn't an issue in my mind but are you willing to risk the friendly coworker. I don't liek mixing work with passion.

Anonymous 19353

why do you think "don't stick your dick in crazy" has become such a popular phrase? it's because people still do, even when it's against their better judgement. even if you're off the walls bonkers you'll still probably be able to find somebody who's interested in you, providing you put yourself out there enough to have the opportunity to meet him

Anonymous 19354

I know a couple people like that. It's not a complete meme, although they are hard to find.

Anonymous 19367

When does age difference start mattering?

Anonymous 19397

People should stop worrying about an arbitrary number difference, and instead consider how comfortable you feel around the other person and if you understand their life experiences. I honestly think dating someone from another country can be harder than dating someone with a 10 year difference in age.

Anonymous 19423

>guy I regularly stare at trips when he sees me staring at him
This is as romantic as it will ever get for me, isn't it?

Anonymous 19431

Not if you ask him out.

Anonymous 19433

Starting at puberty, it matters less and less over time. It's really creepy for a 16 year old to date a 12 year old, but 54 and 50 is totally normal.

Anonymous 19434

>be mixed Indigenous and white
>prefer brown guys (mostly desi or mixed latino)
>every time I see brown guys dating outside of same race it's only aryan blonde girls
Is this a rule? Or just a trend?
I can't even change this aspect of myself. I'd go for other natives but we're so few and far between off the reserve and I'm not going there.

Anonymous 19437

>tfw had a chance to last semester since we always rode the same bus home and while waiting for it he never listened to music or checked his phone often
>decided to take creep shots of him instead
He also seems to be kind of social despite having dweeby skeleton energy, which is very different from me. Idk. Maybe if the chance arises.

Anonymous 19438

If you're picking partners based on their race, don't be surprised when others do the same.
That said, it's simple statistics that most of the girlfriends in North America are white, so if a brown person isn't dating another brown person, they're probably dating a white person.

Anonymous 19442

I mean, I guess I'm not actually surprised. You're right about the probability, I'm just T R I G G E R E D because I'm jealous and need something to blame my failure on.
Just looking for a reason that I'm still a khv at 21 while trying to ignore the true reason (I'm a creepy asshole).
Catch me next week blaming my downward canthal tilt and the fact that I have barely visible crooked bottom teeth or some bullshit.

If I don't have a partner by the time I graduate I may kys myself since my life choices have all been made in order for me to support someone, so stay tuned in 4 years if cc still exists. I may also pussy out though.

Anonymous 19503


I got dumped and I don't know how long I should wait for things to cool down and maybe have another talk and see if things can be worked out or if I should just give up and heal and then start looking again. But I've given up on trusting any men and had what I thought was one of the last trustworthy guys. I have a shitton of issues I'm working on (finally getting into therapy again) so I don't know how I'd even start letting myself be vulnerable again.

Anonymous 19505

>he dumped you
>don't trust men
Male hypergamy? Sorry he left you for "better" women, that's disgusting. Why are men such garbage?

Anonymous 20761


>tfw no bf who will let me kiss his tummy, then suckle on his nipples and cry from joy

Anonymous 20779


>no idea how to meet a man now that I don't plan to go back to uni
>nearly a year since my ex and I broke up
>just turned 26, starting to feel the spiderwebs form in my crotch
I just want a cute guy whose confident and supportive. Doesn't even have to have the same tastes or hobbies as me. I have no idea how to meet these cuties though, and I'm deathly afraid of using Tinder.

I've done so much to reinvent my life, but I've got no one to share it with. I lurk /adv/ on 4chan and every single time some guy ask "how do I find women" and some anon goes "lol just go to bars breh" I get so fucking mad. Like, I don't go to clubs, they scare me to pieces, I don't drink, and I've only ever been with 2 other guys that were years long ordeals. I just sit at home making art and writing all fucking day. I don't know where to go that isn't some sleazy club.

I just wish I were back in uni. At least I'd maybe get noticed more and I wouldn't have to consciously go to some place were predatory men are just looking for another notch.

>guy friend has been wanting me to go on a date with his buddy for about 2 weeks now

>early 30's, not the cutest guy and he's a bit chubby, but he's a commercial pilot that makes good money, takes really good care of himself, and is really sweet
>guy friend tells me how much he talks about me when I'm not around them
>tell him I'm flattered, but honestly feel creeped out because his friend won't tell this to me directly, even though we see each other all the time outside of work
>worried that this might be my only chance since I'm such a fucking shut-in
>conflicted between wanting to stay single until I find someone better aligned with my wants or going on a date with a guy who borderline obsesses over me when we aren't around each other and might have a closet filled with skeletons

I'm losing my fucking mind. Seriously, I envy all of you still in college.

Anonymous 20780

It's been said once, and it'll be said again. Coffeeshops, churches, community groups. Basically the opposite of nightlife. Maybe give the guy a chance, but if your suspicions are true, drop him.

Anonymous 20781


Not everyone wants a religious significant other, and even if a religious person would be fine, I'd be wary of someone who regularly attends church. It's cultish.

Anonymous 20782


I'm not religious, but thanks. I might start doing my writing at a small shop I have near my house. It's always busy as hell. I just feel I won't get approached. I'll keep an eye out though.

>give the guy a chance

I'm willing to, especially when we first met, I definitely was, but I'm conflicted with the whole "ask out by proxy" bullshit. Like, how many times might he have done this with other women? I might be overthinking it, but I don't like how he is using his friend to drop hints. It feels really cowardly, and he friend keeps upselling him. Like, it seems shady as hell. Why can't he sell himself? I don't know. Bad vibes. I don't like judging people like this, but he hasn't approached me to make me feel any different about the situation. Am I judging too much?

Anonymous 20785


I don't think you're asking too much at all. You said you want someone who is confident, he's not. But if you really want to give him a shot anyway, you ask him. Worth a shot and you can try a proper date. If it's no good you've settled it once and for all and gone above and beyond to give him the benefit of the doubt and more than a fair chance to step up.

Anonymous 20788

Jesus Christ just tell your proxy friend to tell the pilot that he must either grows the balls to ask you out or stop bothering you all about it.
As about meeting places, can't you make your art outdoors?
I don't think majority of men find acne repulsing or ugly. But that's just only my opinion.
I love those posts with statements like "he had X but didn't have y". It makes me wonder how likely those women are to change their partner for a "better" one. With better looks/penis/money. All I want in mine is to be caring and that he made me feel "love". That's not much. Unless me bf would make me feel miserable, I wouldn't dump him.

Anonymous 20804

>I won't get approached
No, anon. The biggest most important thing to do in this situation is to make the approach. This guy is definitely a shy one. I don't know if you've been pining for a shy bf, but this is that.

Anonymous 20808


hirame one of the best, hentai artist in the industry right now, did a really amazing hentai with this girl if i remember correctly

Anonymous 20809

>live in town thats 99.9% white
>22 and still havent even completed a associates.

Ive been trying to loose weight and improve my looks as of late tho.

Anonymous 20811

You're off to a good start. Don't be afraid of socialising, before you start feeling comfortable with your appearance. Your personality is a muscle waiting to be trained, just like your body.

Anonymous 20880

There's a guy I've seen around uni who is top tier cute to me (babby face and a remarkable 5'1" or so) but I have no way of ever speaking to him. We've made eye contact a few times and he looks at me every time we're in the same vicinity but I fear that might be because I dress oddly rather than because he finds me cute lol.

How frustrating. He seems a bit social/normie too and I've cold approached one of those before and I don't want to waste anyone's time. But at the same time I do…

Anonymous 20894

is there a tfw no gf thread or do i dump it here bc
>tfw no gf
I have a crush on this cute girl, but she lives far away and I know that I have absolutely no chance ;__;
We will cosplay from the same series at an upcoming con though (and our characters get shipped occasionally so it makes me a tiny bit more excited for it)
still sad

Anonymous 21165


I thought college meant that I would be hooking up with multiple guys and have many options for potential bfs. Already halfway into my first year and I haven't even kissed someone.
I'm tired of being lonely

Anonymous 21168

The odds are the same as anywhere else sadly. It all depends on how willing you are to go up and talk to people.

Anonymous 21169


is there anyone you're interested in?

Anonymous 21228

there's some people I find cute but not one specific person. what sucks tho is finding someone cute and then realize they're already talking to or hooking up with someone, and im too shy to even think about shooting my shot.

Anonymous 21236


picture very relevant

Anonymous 21448


Update: we got really drunk, made out and almost fucked

>Tfw he couldn't get one up cause he was too drunk

>Hasn't talked to me since


Anonymous 21452

>getting someone you like drunk
>trying to have sex with them drunk
>not realising how that sounds
Looks like you just dug your own
grave, again. Start over, and
please don't ever do that again.

Anonymous 21454



How do I get someone to love me, then?

Anonymous 21455


Ah the classic flirt with everyone, but not really haha, I'm just being friendly lol - move.

Anonymous 21456

Don't be shy. Open up! Just remember to be yourself, and not try to get them drunk. It's not very nice.

Anonymous 21457


But what if I need to be drunk to not be shy?

Anonymous 21458

>Ah the classic flirt with everyone, but not really haha, I'm just being friendly lol
I call that a typical Saturday night

Anonymous 21460

The first step is admitting you have a problem.

Anonymous 21461


What is step 2?

Anonymous 21463

Believing a power greater than yourself could restore your sanity.

Anonymous 21464

>We did something maybe embarrassing
>Hasn't talked to me since

You told him that hookup wasn't bad and you want to see him again, didn't you?

Anonymous 21465


Hypothetically speaking, would it be bad if I didn't?

We haven't talked since, as I said

Anonymous 21472

God, anon. If there's one thing you can learn from this it's to not do those things. Just move on and try again.

Anonymous 21497


>guy in one of my classes approaches me after class to ask about something that was just addressed by the prof before we left
>begins conversing with me (small talk)
>pretty respectful, asked if I was okay with him accompanying me to my locker to talk
>he fits what I find attractive almost 100% (except he's an inch taller, I like short boys usually)
I feel…bad about it though, and am not attracted to him for some reason. Just the other week I sat near him and had a sexual fantasy about him (as I do because I'm gross), but now I just feel sick about it.

I'm so used to making men uncomfortable and pursuing them myself that I can't be open to them if they (potentially) reciprocate it. Obviously I don't know if he's interested in me at all, but if he is it's upsetting somehow.

Just venting about me cockblocking my own damn self. jfc I can't win.
tfw your brain won't let you have a bf

Anonymous 21514

Make him wear flats, and put boosts in your shoes. Also please let yourself be in love. If you really can't will yourself to it, then at least pretend to. Think about how he feels.

Anonymous 21546

Literally just use Tindr

Anonymous 21547

*your ability to communicate with people personally

Nobody who considers themselves a social outcast should use a dating app to get started meeting people.

Anonymous 21550

I dunno if guys are likely to cheat on you with a "hotter" woman, a lot of guys at church who I know are dating girls who might not be rated on the 1-10 scale above sorority Stacies, but those girls are always smiling and their boyfriends seem to prefer how nice and stable these girls are. Just my two cents, but it feels like in both guys and girls, good mental health and virtue can add points to your attractiveness to the opposite sex.

Anonymous 21551

Good for you. Don't lower your standards for anyone.

Anonymous 21552

You need to go outside and put yourself in the line of fire. Just be social and you'll eventually get good opportunities. If you're so far into your head that you need to imagine ideal scenarios, you're not spending enough time out and about.

Anonymous 21553

There is, it's called being starved for companionship and hoping for a good woman

Anonymous 21554

Are you implying incels respect women?

Anonymous 21555

Sure they can, the incel meme is pretty bad and I wish it would go away honestly. People who disrespect women have had sex and didn't have sex. The ability of them being able to stick it to a girl doesn't magically mean they respect women. My father is an utter piece of shit who made me and he doesn't respect women, shit he doesn't even respect his kid.

And I know an incel whose so depressed and down on himself at this point due to life circumstances and a really abusive relationship that he can't even find the will or self-esteem to be able to put himself out there that doesn't sound like a bunch of self-loathing and hatred about himself at this point. No girl wants to see a guys pity party on a dating site, and he doesn't understand how to sell himself or see any good in himself. So realistically, there are more incel than just the typical "thot patrol" meme ones that deserve a chance. The world and people aren't black and white, don't let echo chamber memes of normies paint ideas of how people are.

Anonymous 21556

t. incel

Anonymous 21565

Maybe not 'incels' per se, but I've definitely seen guys who really want you to be their best friend first and foremost. Meeting someone like that requires a healthy combination of high standards, self respect, and willingness to take risks within the first two rules. I'm biased towards Church, if that doesn't work for you just try other places you feel safe / somewhat comfortable that aren't your room.
The bar meme is an utter meme, though, and if you don't like bars, you're in luck, because there are a shitload of dudes who don't like bars too. This part might sound weird, but I have a theory that in public places where people go to chill, but not to hook up, guys are less likely to approach girls for fear of looking like predators / assholes. I think that if you can find common ground with someone, striking up a conversation with him might just work out. I dunno, I'm just musing, since things are weird these days. I'd rather have guys asking me all the time, because it's the simplest way to do things, but in this day and age, who the fuck knows anymore.

Anonymous 21611

>tfw this boy smiled at me today without me smiling first or ever at him before
See you, femcels.

Anonymous 21820

Pretty sure we have a thread specifically for that scenario.
Hang out with white guys and ask one out.

Anonymous 21851

That guy probably feels like a looser and ashamed as shit for not being able to fill the shoes the situation put him in like the culture says he should have.

Anonymous 21858

If he can't get hard then he is a loser. She was right to cut off contact with him.

Anonymous 21875

Sometimes I think half of this website consists of larping males…

Anonymous 21893

I don't know.

Anonymous 21894

I only know half of this feel. The loved part, I dunno, but I'm also trying to learn to enjoy being single.

Anonymous 21895


They’re both amazing, the best feelings I’ve ever experienced. There’s something special about feeling the bodily warmth of the other person pressing against you, feeling their heartbeat. When you’re cuddling with someone you love it really feels like time is frozen. Not being nervous to be intimate with someone and being able to confide anything to them with complete trust is really comforting. Maybe I’m being melodramatic but love is just a wonderful feeling. You will find it anons.

Anonymous 21900


>tfw begin coping with tfw no bf when tfw no gf hits
Bisexuality is no joke. 0/10 would not recommend unless you're hot and socially proficient.

Anonymous 21902

red pandas fightin…

>tfw bi but >tfw no gf or >tfw no bf rarely bother me
It's an interesting feel. Pretty nice most of the time.

Anonymous 21912


>tfw shy qt anime bf of my dreams is out there and probably lives within walking distance of me but is too shy to ask me out
I know this is an unhealthy mindset but I feel like such a hoe whenever I make any move towards a boy and all the boys who talk to me are awful

Anonymous 21914

You could always try looking for them. You won't know they aren't there until you're sure of it.

Anonymous 21994


Gonna go ahead and ask a guy out for coffee this Wednesday. This is boy number 4 since last summer so I think I'm prepared for the inevitable rejection…
Pls wish me luck anyway since that's not the preferred outcome. He's very cute and it would be nice to get to know him and hold him.

Anonymous 22008

Good luck, anon!

Anonymous 22029

A boy sat down next to me and TALKED TO me today and I still feel dizzy. His friends were right in front of us and he could have sat next to them but he sat next to ME and introduced himself. Am I becoming stacy oh god

Anonymous 22031

Yes. Your wand should come in tbe mail soon. Don't make him regret opening up. Be sure to communicate back.

Anonymous 22032

Awesome, I get free stuff too? Today is such a nice day
I have to try to be more communicative with people because I prefer to not bother anyone so I don't talk to people but I am realizing that there are some people who would like to talk to me and I am being rude to them by ignoring them… urgh I wish I could live isolated in a bubble sometimes

Anonymous 22033

No, you can't live isolated. Nobody deserves that. The problem plaguing everyone today is the fact they think everyone cares and will kill anyone who speaks to them, like we're all crazies. In reality, nobody cares, and one of the biggest reason anyone goes crazy these days is because of isolation induced by not only themselves, but everyone around them. Please knock down your social barriers. Everybody needs to. Otherwise he'll put his back up, and suffer.

Anonymous 22034

You said that very nicely, especially that everyone thinks something horrible will happen if they speak to someone, but nothing will happen. I wonder why humans are like this, it's stupid. Thanks, I hope I like him when I get to know him.

Anonymous 22036

We weren't always like this. It's a recent inhibition brought on by our heavily digitised and faceless societal standards. Talking to everyone around you with a little box, but never daring to look them in the eye. These interactions are not rare today, but they are certainly not as common as they used to be. An introverts perspective of an aggressive, lonely world is all in their heads, but when more and more believe it to be the case, the more it becomes the truth. Lonely people used to be a minority, but now it only seems to have risen to a silent (ha) majority. Good luck with the friendly guy.

Anonymous 22041

how do I approach shy, cute guys?

there's this quiet boy in the front of my class who's really friendly with the professor but I've never seen him talk to a single person his own age. I want to ask what he's doing after class and if he wants to go chill somewhere but I've never had a real conversation with him and I don't know how to initiate without looking awkward or making a complete fool of myself.

please help me!!! he asks really great questions during class so he's gotta be pretty smart.

Anonymous 22044

Ive had a crush on this shy autistic guy I see in my lectures but have never talked to for months. Im too much of a coward to do anything so Ive just hoped and prayed I'll be put in a group with him for a group project

even if I do get put in his group I'll probably spill my spaget haha

pls kil me

Anonymous 22048

Approach him and compliment his sharp questions, then ask his name, then discuss the class, then next class be bold and sit next to him if he seemed receptive. After that class, ask him to lunch some time.

If he's genuinely autistic he probably won't notice if you spill spaghetti lol.
But he also won't notice subtle cues, so just be blunt with him on a day that you're feeling some low risk aversion.
Might sound weird, but wait until the point in your cycle when T is highest. Impulsivity supposedly increases.

Anonymous 22050

I dont have any opportunities to approach him we have big lectures with 100+ people where the profs talk non stop and he leaves asap when its over. thats why Im waiting for us to be forced together lol

Anonymous 22052

Damn, that is rough. Unless you can somehow sit next to him.
I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, anon lol.

Anonymous 22053

I sat next to him a few times but clammed up every time ;_; he even looked at me like he was hopping I was going to say something but I went into robot mode and said nothing

Anonymous 22054

OH NO, anon you're killing me. I know that feel though and understand.
Was it for lack of knowing what to say? Perhaps start with saying you've seen him in a couple of your classes and think he seems interesting and would like to get to know him. It's the truth after all.
If anything he may spill his spaghetti.

Anonymous 22055

I dont know how to talk to people, especially one on one. I can do okay if I join in a conversation in a small group

I think hes the same. he never talks but some times interjects if people near him are talking with an awkward joke or a random fact. its really cute lol

Anonymous 22056

If you're both awkward it's not the worst it could be though. Since you'll both be on edge you won't be judging each other in your heads lol. Though normies can basically carry the entire conversation alone, they do tend to be a bit subconsciously judgemental.

I'm not the best conversationalist myself, but one thing that's helped me improve is to ask a lot of questions about the other person and engage with what they have to say. Most people enjoy talking about themselves and appreciate listeners (even shy people).
Just be interested in him and show it, since you're already observing him so I'm sure it will be no problem. Also know that after a couple of weeks or so it will get easier with familiarity. I believe in you!

Anonymous 22057

thanks! :)

Anonymous 22080

His class was cancelled today! Fuck!!!
I feel like I'm meant to hit on him, too, since we keep bumping into each other and I've had so many chances to talk to him alone but was unprepared each time. Guess it will be Friday unless fate brings us together again.

Anonymous 22082

Say what's on your mind then, and not what's on your mind now. There's something you want to tell him, the moment you see him, but you're stopping yourself short of letting it out. Tell him you like him!

Anonymous 22085

I definitely will! It just kept catching me by surprise and I didn't feel confident until the time before last when he purposely looked me in the eyes and smiled at me. Before then he stared at me a bit but I assumed it was because I'm one of those people who's always dressed up lol.
Here's to no more regrets.

Anonymous 22088

Don't think of it as a lack of confidence. Think of it more as an overabundance of security. You need to open the door to let them in. Open the door, anon!

Anonymous 22106


I spend 90% of my day thinking about what hes doing. wondering if hes sitting in his flat alone on friday night just like me hahaha!

Anonymous 22107

What, like you know him, or you're imagining him?

Anonymous 22108

hes a shyboy in my lectures like all the other crushes itt lol

Anonymous 22115

He talked to me a little more today and now I am really certain he likes me, I don't know why because we don't know each other. It's so obvious he likes me that I feel under pressure to like him as well, but I'm scared of what will happen if I don't like him when I get to know him, how will I tell him? I don't want him to hope too much right now, I don't want to disappoint him.
Also because of feeling under pressure I don't know if I will be able to like him, because I just want to run away. Why do I have to be like this?? I thought I wanted this but it feels all wrong… I'm scared. Sorry for blogging

Anonymous 22116

Then you know what to do, anon. Approach! Don't let it claw at your mind forever. Talk to him ASAP and see what happens.
Don't run away from love, anon. You need to be brave and tell him you love him back. If you don't, the memory will plague you forever. Don't let it happen.

Anonymous 22120


>at swimming pool
>notice really really cute guy get into the pool
>watch him swim
>he is clearly just starting and is really really slow
>i am a reasonable swimmer
>decide to race him without him knowing it
>do a length, get to the end, stop, and time the seconds it takes him to finish
>do this about 20 times, write down the results on my swim sheet as I go
>he gets out and goes to the hydrothermal pool
>follow him
>get in the hydrothermal pool with him
>take my sheet which is wrapped in a plastic folder
>wave it in his face
>he looks at me, absolutely horrified
>seems to feel I insulted him or something
>paddles away and gets out
>tfw no bf

Anonymous 22121

I'm a social retard and even I know that's a garbage way to approach a guy.
Jfc I hope this is fiction or some copypasta I'm ignorant of.

Anonymous 22128


Anonymous 22129


I think it's cute.

Anonymous 22130

leave incel

Anonymous 22132

You were in your teenage years right?

Anonymous 22134

post boyfriend pics

Anonymous 22136

tbh you could be the ugliest bitch and still get a handsome boyfriend, a coworker of mine, she was fugly seriously acne the whole nine yard but every month or so she would have a new boyfriend and they would i kid you not they would leave her food or presents whenever they drop by my boss had to tell her they couldnt visit, I remember once one of them came after work looking for her I told him she already left for the day and it happened plenty of times WITH DIFFERENT MEN. So in my experience I think its more about the confidence and the way you present yourself sure she was hella ugly but she was super friendly and she had a very nice atitude I remember when she left (some guy proposed to her) many of our clients were asking for her even the female clients, they were like "where's x i really liked her she was so friendly" I think thats the deal that you have to have confidence you could be the ugliest person but if you know how to market yourself as the best choice you can make it work or as they say "fake it til ya make it"

Anonymous 22148

I failed yet again to ask this fucker I'm interested in out for coffee. I was ready and walked behind him for a good 5 minutes but…I kept thinking "no, he's out of my league." It looks like he works out a bit and he has such nice eyes. Objectively, we have similar eyes and I also work out but idk! Insecurity is illogical!

But being close to him confirmed that he is almost definitely 5 feet tall. Fucking amazing. Probably another reason why he'd reject me since such short men are few and far between so they're in high demand. Although it's also the only reason I'm still attracted to him despite the fitness thing lol.

I just wanted to vent. I'm not expecting any words of comfort or encouragement, I don't think I'll ever do this. It's hopeless. I hate myself.

Anonymous 22150

You have to do it, or this will haunt you forever. "what if" No. Don't plan what you're going to say, or when you're going to say it. Just do what you feel, and act on impulse.

Anonymous 22151


Reminder that 1 in 3 males have a foot fetish, so better make peace with that idea and take care of you feet.

Anonymous 22152

>it will haunt you
I know…I know I have to do it or worry about that. I think I just flinch at the idea now after being burned a few times.
I just have to dissociate when the next chance comes I guess. Grin and bear it.
Sauce for that?
I'm fine with it btw since I have one myself lel. Just wouldn't have guessed that many! That means at least one of the men I've hit on was a fellow footfag…huh.

Anonymous 22153



Raw estimates, https://www.nature.com/articles/3901547 that could be considered a bit inflated, so lets just agree that is between 1 in 6 to 1 in 3 male. Thing is, is the most common fetish in men.

"It was concluded that the most common fetishes were for body parts or for objects usually associated with body parts (33% and 30% respectively). Among those people preferring body parts, feet and toes were preferred by the greatest number, with 47% of those sampled preferring them. Among those people preferring objects related to body parts, 32% were in groups related to footwear (shoes, boots, etc.)."

And that was back in 2007 where people thought that shit was taboo, nowadays I would say that is more common

Anonymous 22154

Thanks anon, I had no idea it was so common. Although the study seemed gender neutral from just skimming it, I imagine it's still men making up most of them.

Also ot but that girl's body type is so cute. Huggable with a bit of squish.

Anonymous 22155

This lady's dress is so pretty, does anyone know what kind of dress it is? Or is it a top and skirt? Anyway I think it would be nice to sew something like that but I don't know what to google to find this. I hope I'm not derailing too much

Anonymous 22156

>tfw smelly sweaty hyperhydrosis feet that would knock out any man who goes near them
my body is wired for no man to ever choose me

Anonymous 22158

I know id be cute and dateable if i lost weight, but its so hard. I want to eat everything.

Anonymous 22159

Same. I could be pretty and skinny in under a year if I stuck with a diet but I want to eat too many high calorie things not in moderation.

Anonymous 22161

You guys are lucky, I'm skinny and butt-ugly. A fat guy at school used to bully me and say "I'm fat, you're ugly. I can lose weight. What about you?" and I'd spaghetti and say "w-w-well lose the weight first and then try again!!!" but a few years later he got buff and I still hadn't even grown boobs.

Anonymous 22163

thats nice anon and lucky, ive lost a lot of weight but still fat but i cant really fix my face or hair or body shape (as in where my fat gets distributed). losing weights kinda easy if you can control yourself took me years to actually start losing since i had poor self control, popcorn (not smothered in butter), seaweed and baby cucumbers are some lower calorie snacks that have helped with my habits. and you need to get used to reading the label on everything. you can log your calories using apps but i dont do that since it stresses me out and i eat more for some reason, i keep mental tabs on everything ive ate. you can lose weight sitting on your ass but exercise will help it along, just dont eat to reward yourself for exercising, stick to your calorie limit.
i hope you find the mental power to start and stick to it anon, took me years to build it up, good luck!

Anonymous 22187

There are guys that are into that.

Anonymous 22190

Somewhat same. I could lose weight, but I'm afraid it won't even look good at this point.
I have a shitty shaped body with small boobs for my frame, violin hips, and a pot belly. I've only become more self conscious of this as I've lost weight. I do get more male attention than I did when I was a fatass, but I'm afraid that if I lose any more I'll lose any curves I have now.

Anonymous 22193

Guys love small boobs, don't be ashamed of your "lack of curves"! The idea that you have to have big boobs or a big butt to attract attention is seriously damaging (and leads to a lot of back pain).

The reason guys want to see a thin girl is the same reason they like to see a girl who puts a little effort into dressing up, makeup, whatever (not that they can understand it on a deep level, it's definitely unconscious for them) – they want a girl who shows she has discipline and can take care of herself.

Don't give up on your body just because of your cup size. It's not worth it!

Anonymous 22207

>ask this boy out
>he says yes and reads as nervous but excited
>pretty sure he went to the wrong place and we completely missed each other for the date
>he may think I was pranking him (although he seems normie-ish a few of his posts on his social media show insecurity about his height and body)
The universe wants me to be tfw no bf forever, huh? After thinking it over I'm about 90% sure he didn't stand me up at least.

Anonymous 22208

Poor boy's probably too nervous to talk to girls, let alone date them. This is definitely the case, if your taller than him, or more fit. Keep chase, anon. Love is a tiring game to play, but the longer you're at it, the better it feels to win! Call him up!

Anonymous 22209

He does have female friends actually…but by the looks of it he seems to be orbiting them haha since he has some tfw no gf mood things up and is still single.
He seems like a sweetheart though and I definitely want it to work! I've been pining after him for over a month now lol.

Anonymous 22210

Anonymous 22212

So they're like suitors to him. lol

Be sure to not let them string him on. I think he'll fall head over heels if you just be honest with how you feel towards him. You already talked about how insecure he is for his appearance. Have you complimented him before?

Anonymous 22215


I assume he's more like a suitor to them? Since he seemed a bit taken aback by a woman pursuing him. But yeah! If we get close it would pain me to see him have any friends that mistreat him.
We've only talked once actually, I'm mostly reading him based on his social media presence. Which has actually revealed a lot about him and idk why I was so intimidated by him before, he seems quite vulnerable and kind. Seems he's dealt with some mental health issues and now advocates for that (aside from the body image issues).

I really hope it works and he was just being ditzy and got the wrong place, I'd like to get to know him and love him. And I want him to know that.

Anonymous 22232

He's avoiding me now. He either thinks I'm a big jerk toying with him or never wanted the date in the first place.
Kms. At least by asking men out so many times I've established that I have Big Dick Energy and can use that as fuel for my self esteem.
Big clit energy..?

Anonymous 22233

Don't be so quick to judge. Unless he says it straight to your face, you can only assume it's an assumption. You need to try and confront him, and not aggressively, but passively. Until you get the word from him, you'll never be sure.

Anonymous 22235

Did you set up a date without getting contact info? Text him. Or message on Facebook/whatever social media you're stalking him with

I have to assume this applies to men too but I find text I can reply to at my leisure to be a little less threatening than a face to face confrontation

Anonymous 22242

He was definitely, purposely avoiding me. But if I was a self conscious manlet who thought some girl was pranking me then I'd avoid her too. Don't blame him.
I'll try to grab him on Friday. Stand closer to his class or something, since I was too far away to catch up to him. I want closure! I want to clarify what happened and don't want him to feel bad! AH!
I took your advice but he probably won't see it since Facebook tends to not notify about messages from non-friends.
If not, again, Friday it is.

Anonymous 22243

Is it healthy to be ok with loving someone who you know will never love you back (and might possibly dislike you)? Im not crazy or anything, and im not going to act on it.

Anonymous 22244

That's the spirit, anon. Get that boy!
What makes you think they don't like you? You'll never know for sure, until you ask.

Anonymous 22247


Because i was a bitch to him (hes my coworker) and im also fat,ugly, and a different race than he is.

I come from a abusive childhood/upbringing and a lot of times I will act mean to people I like as a defense mechanism
("ill get you to hate me so i dont have to worry about you not liking me first").

Its stupid and i feel like shit, hes a super sweet guy.

apparently he didn't care, and we can talk now but its very awkward and i can tell he doesn't want to be around me at all. I cant even look him in the face because i feel so guilty and embarrassed. Hes been (And continues to be) nothing but polite to me but its obvious hes closer with everyone else. Ive been trying my hardest to be nicer to him after a another coworker intervened (though at that point we were already friendly and he just made things awkward.)

I do some of his paper work sometimes and other small things, but im always constantly doing things and helping people out so he doesnt get it. He thinks im just being nice. Last week I heard him mention not ever having a particular snack before so I brought some for "everyone" (him) at work and he thought it was misplaced stock and everyone else ate it instead because we dont work the same shifts anymore and i didnt want to outright say i got them for him.

I dont expect anything will happen. But i just want to know what i should do personally. I feel like a retard. I feel like if i express any interests for him he'll be disgusted by me, so i avoid him and everyone assumes its because i hate him.

Anonymous 22248

Apologise. Tell him everything you just told me, and explain yourself. Open up to him. Also mention that stuff was for him.

Anonymous 22256

today I sat next to him. he didnt seem to react to my presence and I didnt get a chance to start a conversation before the end of the lecture ;_;

Anonymous 22259

No one will notice you, if you don't warrant a notice. Please speak up. Be extra punctual to ensure you have the time to talk to him, and when the time comes, talk to him.

Anonymous 22288


I was about to lose hope but he messaged me back today, although I didn't check until now (fucking 1 am) so I'll wait until the morning to reply.
He said he was surprised but also not sure if he actually wants to date right now. And he called me cute. Although he didn't explain what happened so I won't let the flattery distract me from him having still potentially stood me up and now just saving face. I actually missed my class today (when he'd see me) so I wonder if that made him feel bad or curious or something lol.

On guard! But also warm and fuzzy.

Anonymous 22296

>tfw he didn't answer my question about what happened
>tfw he's a massive normie who also seems uninterested in me
I think I'm better off alone than with someone who makes me uncomfortable.

Anonymous 22299

>question about what happened last night
He's insecure, right? Probably not a good idea to start interrogating him about why he wasn't there when you know he's shy. You should think about if you're making him uncomfortable. Please don't be messaging him more than once. Don't be clingy.

Anonymous 22300

Nah, I asked about why we didn't end up meeting for the date but he never clarified.

We ended up talking and he was pretty easy going but we have nothing in common and after a while he seemed tired of responding. I just said it's okay to end it and he was fine with that, but asked if we could be friends with benefits. Guess he thought he may as well shoot his shot since we're both attracted to each other lel. But I'm A PURE MAIDEN and not about that life so it's over.

…am I Stacey now, though kek? Got a fwb offer.
But still tfw no bf. Eternally tfw no bf.

Anonymous 22302

>can we still be friends
Ya blew it. He's just begging for you to be close to him, and now you're gonna ghost him. I could cut through your autism with a knife. Just why?

Anonymous 22304

He didn't ask to be friends, though. He asked to be fuck buddies after giving 2-3 word replies to my questions about him. And he didn't ask any about me, which is fine but just. The conversation was flat.
I appreciate that he was also attracted to me (nice) but sex under non-romantic circumstances isn't appealing to me. Not into sleeping with someone while desperately trying to convince them that I'm marriage material.

Anonymous 22306

>talk to guy over OkCupid
>long-ass messages talking about a lot of stuff
>exchange off-site contact info
>soon he starts bringing up bdsm/kink shit
>i keep responding but not in a way that invites further discussion, and try to change the subject
>conversation gets more and more sexual from his side
>i make jokey remarks and tell him I'm not interested in talking about that stuff
>keeps bringing it up and suddenly starts talking about how I'm cute and he wonders what kind of breasts I have (large or small, firm or saggy)
>my replies slow down and he asks me if this is still happening

why are men? why is it so hard to get to know someone without shit immediately turning sexual?

Anonymous 22307

>how dare you not appreciate that a guy you have no connection with asked you to fuck

it's almost as if men will fuck anyone as long as they hit the bare minimum requirements and OP was looking for companionship and not fwb, image that

Anonymous 22308


>be fat, with a horrible moonface
>work with a really cute guy in the office
>have creeped on him multiple times and feel really bad but he doesn't know what I have done

things i've done to creep on him include

>stealing his sandwiches from the work fridge, peeling off the lower slice of brown bread, and replacing it with some slightly lighter coloured bread that i had held under my armpits the night before making them slightly darker, so he ate my armpits

>stalking him to and from work
>over the course of 2 years slowly changed the work dress policy so that men would be allowed to wear slightly shorter sleeves because i was so desperate to see more of his arms (nobody noticed but i had to change publically available documents and it showed that i had edited them, so i made sure the changes were not noticeable each time - the policy is just pictures of appropriate dress so i photoshopped them to have shorter sleeves)
>wrote several angry complaints that trans people were using the womens toilets (there were 2 in company) so they'd be forced to use the mens so he'd think all the other women here are trannies and want to fuck me instead
>always steal his used cups out of the bins and take them home

i'm lonely to be fair

Anonymous 22310

I've seen men give each other dating advice saying that a woman will decide if she is willing to have a relationship with him within minutes, so if a woman is not willing to be openly sexual right off the bat then no relationship can ever happen.

It's actually a very common claim:

Even the famous physicist Richard Feynman wrote it into his autobiography:
>We went into the bar, and before I sat down, I said, “Listen, before I buy you a drink, I want to know one thing: Will you sleep with me tonight?”
>So it worked even with an ordinary girl!

It sounds crazy to me, but those men (like Feynman) often have relationships, and I don't. Maybe I really am just frigid.

Anonymous 22312

>We went into the bar, and before I sat down, I said, “Listen, before I buy you a drink, I want to know one thing: Will you sleep with me tonight?”

This is a hook-up. So, of course it works if you just want to get laid, which is based on sexual attraction and little else. I don't want to hook up, so I don't want to give sexually explicit affirmations right away. I made it clear that I was excited to meet up and go on a date, but that I wasn't interested in talking sexual shit yet. Still he kept going. This isn't to gauge my interest - I already said I was interested- , it's just because he's horny and doesn't want to listen.

Anonymous 22313

nice larp

Anonymous 22314

>that specific feel when girls in the femcel thread can model out male behavior by instinct better than you can by study because you just don't have the brain parts for human relationships

Anonymous 22315

Your post also implies the requirement that every woman is open and brash enough to talk about her sexual desires, which is far from reality. Also, we're constantly berated if we're too sexually open and express that, so we really can't win - after all you don't want to be a "slut" and too easy because you told a guy you'd fuck him right after meeting.

It's really bullshit and has nothing to do with actual dating and getting to know each other, it only works for hookups and is PUA rhetoric at best. Also, who's saying the woman in your example didn't just say yes to get a free drink and then fucked off instead of fucking him?

Anonymous 22316

>if she sleeps with you within [time period] she's a whore and not dating material
Also men:
>if she DOESN'T sleep with you within [time period] she doesn't like you and isn't dating material

I'd agree many women do get sexually attracted right away but with pump and dump being common why risk it lmao? It's also fucking dangerous jfc. You can catch STDs (condoms aren't 100% effective) or, because generally men are larger and you don't know what a stranger is up to, get assaulted.

Anonymous 22317

>Also, who's saying the woman in your example didn't just say yes to get a free drink and then fucked off instead of fucking him?
You didn't read the Feynman link, did you?

Anonymous 22318

I did read it, but it's still literally PUA storytime, just from 100 years ago, and I'm speaking about reality and [current year] rather than an anecdote.

Anonymous 22319

I don't see why Dr. Feynman would lie about that?

I guess I just still don't understand hooking up, or dating, or men. I still remember how bad I felt when I realized everyone in high school who was talking about hooking up with someone meant having sex, and not just hanging out or spending time together.

Anonymous 22321

Feynman was an incel tbh

Anonymous 22322

I didn't say he's lying, but I'm saying that this single anecdote doesn't universally apply to any dating experience. Also, you used these "studies" (lmao) as a response to me complaining about my specific situation rather than a general question or hypothesis.

Anonymous 22324

I didn't call anything a study, I said "claims." Male claims, male beliefs, to describe a male rationale, because your post ended with the question of why males don't want to spend time getting to know someone without immediate sexual stuff.

Anonymous 22325

Anonymous 22326

Saying you've tried to study men is not the same thing as saying that the links posted were "studies."

Anonymous 22328

If that's honestly how it is, then you do need to move on. I guess he doesn't understand, and it's a bit taxing to change his mind. Doesn't mean you have to give up on finding someone.

Anonymous 22548

update on this. the groups for the last project of the year have been announced and we were not put in the same group

thats the end of my chances :(

Anonymous 22557

Never give up, anon.

Anonymous 22559

My friend was in a group with a boy and she regrets not being more forward because she was certain he liked her but she was too shy. So even being in his group wouldn't have necessarily secured your chances. The overall message of the story is not to wait for that magic lottery ticket to fall out of the sky; you need to do something.

Sit next to him in a lecture, ask how the work's going, if there are other classes you both do, ask if he wants to study for them. In a way you're lucky you aren't in the same group, there's no risk of things becoming awkward if he does decline your advances. Good luck anon :)

Anonymous 22561

An update of sorts.
I didnt Apologize to him like you said or tell him ive been doing stuff for him, but ive been doing my best to open up to him and be friendly. We are very friendly now and when we are on the same shifts we chit-chat. Hes been opening up to me a little, especially when we are alone (he talked about some of his insecurities the other day and i was shocked!) but I dont think itll go anywhere because im fat + black. Sometimes I get the feeling he may like be back but im not sure, hes kind of a socially awkward nerd like i am and i can tell he has a low self esteem; So im not sure if he is afraid of making a move or is genuinely uninterested. I dont want to scare him or gross him out by being aggressive. We have similar interests so i think if anything itd be nice if we were friends. Thanks for the advice.

Anonymous 22565

>Looks are the bare minimum.

This is why you are alone.

Anonymous 22568

It's nothing, anon. Please, continue to open yourself to him. I wish you the best of luck.

Anonymous 22608

>decide to give up on men for a while because it never works out
>some fucker in my math class starts looking at me and we share smiles each time we pass each other
>he's small and cute and alarmingly attractive in the face
>he spends long stretches of time on his own, never with friends
Kms. I don't have the energy to make an overture and he'll just disappoint me guaranteed. He's probably secretly a degenerate piece of shit or a filthy slut.
I hate this world. Everyone is so awful, me included.

Anonymous 22613

Please be nice to him. Maybe he'll make you happy.

Anonymous 22614

update to this update

there is actually another group project for a different class, but this one is pick your own groups, not assigned, and I might be too scared to ask if he wants to work together

also I rarely go to this class so I dont know anyone there. stressing rn

Anonymous 22618

Just do it, anon! You don't have to be alone. :(

Anonymous 22621


I hope they will start making intelligent androids who you can date soon.

Anonymous 22622

I love this artist

Anonymous 22721

Jesus Christ anon stop wallowing in self-pity, there are thousands of philosophical texts and idea just a few clicks away you can read to give you a new grasp on life

Anonymous 22723


he was sitting right in front of me. all I had to do is tap him on the shoulder and ask if he wanted to group, but I sat there and did fucking nothing and he got assimilated into a different group. Im so fucking angry with myself. FUCK

now Im in a group with some people I dont really like just because we already knew eachother and it was convenient

right fucking there. all I had to do was fucking ASK. I feel jealous of the people he grouped with. fucking kill me I dont deserve to be happy when I fuck everything up

Anonymous 22724

sorry I fucked up. looks like I do have to be alone

Anonymous 22727

You're the only one who can lead yourself to fate. Talk to him, anon. Don't look for an excuse to. Just do it.

Anonymous 22729

Why did some talkative, extroverted qt normfag ask me to coffee? I assumed he was talking to me since he wanted votes while he was running for some role in the student union, but he asked after losing?

I'm not sure if he's into me or just being outgoing. He said that he basically wants to make new friends outside of his culture (he's an international student), but also felt the need to tell me his fear of making romantic moves/rejection.

Regardless, am glad he forgot that time that I stared at his (cute) feet last semester when he wore sandals to class.

What do, miners? I'll at least stay his friend since he's nice and I enjoy the company of talkative people. He's a comfy guy.

Anonymous 22731

Go out with him? You don't really know him well enough to make any judgement of him, so it wouldn't hurt.

Anonymous 22732


>Regardless, am glad he forgot that time that I stared at his (cute) feet last semester when he wore sandals to class.

I’d be skepticle if he really did anon. That you suggests he forgot it means you know he noticed. Did he call you out on staring down there or something?

Anonymous 22735

>>His wife must be abusing him to a point he's afraid of other women. She doesn't want him associating with other women.

Anonymous 22736

Well we did talk for 3 hours straight, but I guess that isn't enough to know a person. He came off as simultaneously confident and self-conscious somehow, and felt the need to confess to me all the things he did wrong as a kid/teen kek. Along with his dreams/friend drama/analysis of how he handles emotions. Absolute oversharer.
He's just kind of goofy and friendly. Like a dog.

But I'm not sure if he's actually into me at all and whether I should put the effort forward to make a romantic move. I'm used to being rejected by men now and find it hard to believe one that I'm attracted to could like me back. Also unsure if I'm ready for my manic pixie dream boy tbh.

Nah, but he definitely saw me staring at him since I was going through a shameless thing at the time and WANTED men to be creeped out.
But he didn't even recall us being in the same class.

Anonymous 22739

He seems pretty overly friendly. I say take him.

Anonymous 22785


Tell me why his feet were cute, anon. My ex bf was a footfag and I didn't really understand it, and I've never came across a girl who is into them before

Anonymous 22786


>seeing him laughing and joking around with another girl

Anonymous 22788

Im not interested in any other guys. the last time I was, was ~3 years ago, the next one will probably be in another 3+ years

I dont get interested in people often, so it hurts even more when I fuck it up, because I know there wont be another chance any time soon

Anonymous 22794

They were just well groomed, not knobbly or lumpy or anything, and his small toes were nicely sized in comparison to his big toe. I also like when men have particularly small feet, although his are not.

I'm not the biggest footfag and I'm sure there are terms in the community for these tastes but idk them. I can appreciate a cute foot though.

Anyway to update the whole ordeal, it's his birthday today and I sent him a birthday message. He replied saying "thank you buddy" with a couple of emojis. Is this the friendzone? Or just him trying to sound friendly when not super familiar with English?

Anonymous 22795

>If I don't have a partner by the time I graduate I may kys myself since my life choices have all been made in order for me to support someone
Please don't, even if you're saying that in jest. You're your own person, and you don't need a partner to be fulfilled. It's a shame that you are making a fictional partner the source of your decision making, and not doing what makes YOU happy. (No, imagining giving your life to some dude is not making you happy, it's escapism, sorry)

Anonymous 22802

Did he reply right away or take forever? That's the biggest sign that he is excited to talk to you

Anonymous 22803

He took four hours, but he wasn't using instagram during that time (where we're communicating) so he may have just not seen it.
And he seems to be hanging out with his friends atm (based mutual friend (well, acquaintance for me) posting about it in a story) so I won't bother him anymore today. But! Will probably see him in class tomorrow morning.

I think I may actually like this idiot. We'll see.

Anonymous 22837

large (1).jpg

Am I the only one that doesn't want a bf? I'm not against it if it happens, but I don't want to go out of my way to find one (even though I am because I have very low self esteem). I find dating tedious and boring, and on the rare circumstance you open up and chemistry is great, the other person just isn't looking for something too serious quite yet, which only makes me not want to open up any further. I hate playing the numbers game, I just don't have the heart to do it. If I want a bf I want a boyFRIEND. I don't want someone to flirt with, and occasionally go out to dinner and/or fuck. The whole concept is absolutely bizarre to me.

>mfw no bf

pic related

Anonymous 22839

Nah I know that feeling. It’s pretty common I think.

Anonymous 22853

Not alone at all!

Anonymous 22856

We're chatting like regular people now, like friends. I get a feeling he doesn't see it as anything more which is fine.
But also
>had a dream last night that he sent me nudes (not dick pics, straight up pics of his ass in lingerie)
>tfw woke up and this wasn't true
Day ruined.
I mean I'd want more than a sex thing anyway, but wouldn't complain about free nudes.

Anonymous 22860

Good. If he was just trying to get sum fuk, he wouldn't be who you thought he was. Keep him close, but know your distance. Maybe it'll get better than just friends.

Anonymous 22935


I was actually surprised to find that the man's not a sleaze at all. In [current year] it's hard to find men that don't follow a bunch of thots, but he follows none. I follow more than him.

He's just a very good boy all around. Not perfect, maybe a bit impulsive and prefers play over work but…very nice.
He may be 3 pure 5 me tbh.

But we're at the point where he's sending me posts I may like which is nice. He rarely makes it to our 8am class because of insomnia but wants to keep in contact somehow it seems.

Anonymous 22937

Leglock, leglock. Go in for the kill!

Anonymous 22938

Nah, on my experience this is (by far) more common among girls than guys.

Anonymous 22942

I argue it's because it's harder for guys to find validation. Most girls can put on some makeup and post to instagram and get a few likes etc.

Anonymous 22944

It sure is slow in here at the weekends. All the Stacies going out there partying and such. No time for funposting at c.c…

Anonymous 22947

I'll funpost you!

Anonymous 22948

update to my update.
For whatever reason, everything was cool for maybe a week and now its done to shit again. It seemed like he was uncomfortable being around me / wanted space so i started distancing myself from him (physically) to move about freely because i dont want to be a bother; and now everyone thinks i hate him again. No good deed goes unpunished.

I dont know if hes creeped out or annoyed by me or what. I havent come on hard or anything but randomly it seems like one day were perfectly fine and then the next it feels like im the absolute last person on earth he wants to even be in the mere presence of. Im honestly a little frustrated with dealing with him for personal + work reasons so i think its best if i moved on. I met a nicer guy at my local game night who seems to actually like me, so hopefully thatll work out.

Anonymous 22949


Not that anon but is this a euphemism and if so pic related.
It took you 10 days to post an update, nice blog post. At least tl;dr me.

Anonymous 22952

Nta but all of /feels/ is blogposting. What do you want? Only abstract discussion of tfw no bf?

Anonymous 22953

I'll funpost you too from bed <3

Anonymous 22955


Seems kind of crummy to only post once every 10 days, expecting people to either follow or to go back through the thread to see where you stand.
I'm guessing if you care enough to post your problems here you want at least a friendly word, if not a bit of advice. The way you're handling it just makes you look like you only post to share your problems, not to drive any further discussion.

Anonymous 22957

Again, nta, but I both post my own problems and discuss the issues others' have, as well as take part in more general feels threads. You have no way of knowing if other anon is the same way.
And perhaps she updated 10 days later because this is the only change that's happened. There have been a handful of full ass threads about relationships that anons updated up to a month later and people still follow the events. Like that one girl whose crush thought she was pranking him when she confessed and they gradually became friends before he got a gf (rip if you read this, op of that thread).

It's a slow tiny board anon. Not to mini mod but…pls no bully. I mean. I guess you can if you want.

Anonymous 22958


I guess I'm just pissy because replies generally happen in the span of hours, days, and weeks. I have 8 tabs open waiting for something to happen but it's just so slow. This is the only one where anything has happened, and it's been an hour.
It's not like there isn't enough content, the 8 threads I have open are enough material for hours of discussion.

Anonymous 22959


Nta, but while I am sometimes frustrated by the slowness if cc, I find it endearing. Like penpals or something. There's a pleasant satisfaction in suddenly getting a reply to a post you made last week. Plus, it's relaxing not to feel pressure to reply quickly and always be checking back (even though I'm on cc all the time).

Anonymous 22960

At least for 4chan there's Clover so I can bookmark any threads I phonepost in. I'm on desktop rn and cc just feels like a chore. I don't know what to do with these tabs.
Though if you want a pen pal it's much easier to arrange through discord/facebook/actual mail. Lots of anons here are one-day tourists.

Anonymous 22961

I prefer the slowness of Turqoise Tearoom because I used to have an addiction to 4chan. Now I can just check one or twice a day to see new posts and threads.

Anonymous 22962

Tbqh the pink girltalk theme is best.

Anonymous 22963


I know the feeling, it really took me a while to get into gear with the speed here.
Too used to 4chan's ridiculous speed, even hanging out on traditionally slower boards.

I like autumn light, it's got that cosy feeling.

Anonymous 22966

I guess that's one way to look at it; Maybe life really is supposed to be this slow.

Anonymous 22967


By the standards of online communities, mineral restaurant IS quite sedate.
I think it's nice though. Really draws an incredible contrast between here and 4chan.

Anonymous 22976

Currently freaking out because of my lack of romantic/sexual experience. I’ve never had a boyfriend and I feel like I’m no where near to possibly having one right now or in the future.
I’ve only ever kissed one person and wish we could’ve expanded on our relationship but due to living pretty far from eachother now that’s definitely not an option. It hurts even more when my friend tells me that I should date him which gives me false hope and keeps me hooked on him even more when we haven’t seen eachother in four months. I know he’s gotten with other girls and could even be talking to someone right now while I haven’t done anything since.
I just feel out of place and worthless, I wish things played out differently with our relationship or that I was able to become more experienced

Anonymous 22977

You know, it doesn't matter. Experience doesn't make someone more desirable. IT's only a shallow thing, oh boy someone knows how to suck a dick real good, you can learn to suck a dick real good over time. In a real relationship, it's based on way more than a shallow thing of how well you can kiss or preform romantic acts. These things you can learn, what matters is the person you're dating and how well you mesh with them.

As someone whose been though a lot of bullshit, everything you want "experience" in is shit you can learn with the right person. Anyone who would leave you over being bad at sex or doing physical affection poorly is not someone you want to be with. You will love someone regardless how poorly their acts of romance are, they might say you are bad and how you can improve, but it should never be a reason to not love someone.

Anonymous 22978


Not that anon but I'm also a khhv and I'm less worried about sex and physical experience and dwelling more on how I should react to certain events emotionally.
Right now I'm pic related on legs and it might just be who I am, or it might be something I can (and should) un-learn. That's what I'm afraid of; I'm afraid of the social and emotional wreck that I (believe that I) am.
What if somebody kisses me on the cheek? (Let's pretend this is possible in our universe.) I'd probably just jump back and instinctively wipe it off my cheek. Am I supposed to do that? Is it viewed as offensive? It's not that I wouldn't appreciate it, I'm just inexperienced in intimate communication, physical OR verbal.

I'm thinking a possible solution to my problem (possibly >>22976's as well) is just setting up a tinder account and chatting with random people. To learn how to respond to advances in real time if nothing else.

Anonymous 22979

>Cheek kisses
I'll keep this short since it's super late here and I'm a living human wreck who can't stop playing video games. In a romance it's way more common to you know actually kiss, not get kissed like you're getting kissed by your family.

And no, most normal people wouldn't wipe off the place they were just kissed, it's mostly seen as offensive. It shows a sign of disgust that the act was even committed. Honestly experience isn't what fixes those things, I'm a human wreck but I'm gonna be real with you, actions like THAT aren't going to end well if you're going to randomly hook up with people. Clearly you spew spagetti and the last thing you need is a rando whose just looking to bust judging you on all your weird quirks that aren't normal for romantic/intimate action. And this is honestly no hate towards you, but that will just end poorly for you unless they are nice enough to not mention those kind of things to your face and just shit talk you behind your back to their friends.

You legit need to connect to your romantic side of yourself and honestly I'm unsure how to do that in a healthy manner. I was kinda born as a garbage person whose a hopeless romantic. Things like romance come easy to me because I have that heavy desire for it and I welcome these kind of interactions. You just gotta find that person inside whose capable of romance. Possibly watching romantic media, and just I don't know, it's a really intimate thing to try to give suggestions on. People are different. But I don't believe experience is the problem with you, as more so you have yet to get in touch with your romantic side.

Anonymous 22980

I know its ot but what are you playing? I've been looking for something to distract me from the fact I will not find a bf any time soon

Anonymous 22981

Kirby - Nightmare …

>In a romance it's way more common to you know actually kiss, not get kissed like you're getting kissed by your family.
My feeling of detachment from this world right now is off the charts. I may as well be on Mars for how much I have in common with humanity, dear lord.

I've tried romantic media before but it's all kind of corny. The only movie like that I've ever liked was 500 Days of Summer, but I've always failed to understand really either of the lead characters.
This romantic shit can be so endearing but on the other hand I view it as kind of pathetic. It's a bit of an inner conflict, also because I've seen so many people be all grabby with their partner in public, and I don't want to be that.
Tbf this whole thread has been ot for a while haha.
I'm also interested, what kind of games do you play anon? I'm currently on a GBA nostalgia trip (pic related is peak /comfy/), even though I've only ever played like 12 GBA games.
And on that topic, how likely would it be to find a partner through an online game? Lots of gamers are lonely people in my experience.

Also my personal tip to escape the loneliness is to go out and do some exercise. Biking, running, walking, hell even driving helps me. Works for a few hours at least.

Anonymous 22982

What would you girls do for a boyfriend?

Anonymous 22987


I think the more relevant question is "What have you done/been doing to get a boyfriend?"

Me personally I'm into girls. I haven't done jack shit. I made a fake Tinder account using a picture of a chair once, went probably better than my own face would have done.
I went to a few club/bar type places on Thursday night with friends, but I just stuck around with the two or three people I knew. I also don't drink so this whole party life isn't really my thing.

Anonymous 22988

As in…what would you do to get one? Or what would you do for one once you have him?

For the first idk how much I'd give to get a bf, I wouldn't sacrifice my family or friends or any of my organs. Or my life. But I have, and will continue, to approach men actively. I've also worked a lot on my looks this past year and try to always be dressed up well every day and workout often.

As for the second, I'm working towards a career that can make decent money so I can spoil him and I can create art to show my appreciation for him. Sexually I'd say I'm also a giver, although not a sub. I wouldn't require a guy to be an active participant in the bedroom since a pillow prince would be ideal.

Looks wise I'm not a 10/10 so I don't have that to offer, but have other things I think. I draw the line at taking abuse or being put in situations that make me too uncomfortable, but overall I have a lot of love and support to give to the right person. Although I am a bit awkward.

Anonymous 22989

Despite my lack of experience I think I’m also worried about not EVER gaining any experience? Like never finding a guy to kiss me or do romantic and sexual things with. I feel like I’m running out of time. A majority of the people I know have at least been in relationships before/hooked up with multiple people. I really am the odd one out.

Anonymous 22990

>moving this summer so haven't bothered dating for over 2 years now
I'm LONELY I want a bf
Only a few months left but I'm going crazy, I want cute handholding dates and cuddle. Winter is finally over now I just need to get through spring and half of summer and I can finally start dating cute boys.

Anonymous 22991

I already can't get a boyfriend despite men making up 50% of the population, I can't imagine being a lesbian

Anonymous 22992

I've been playing OSU! SNES and PSP lately while waiting on my ffxiv sub to run out

Anonymous 22995

>You seem like a walking conflict haha.
You are not wrong… I've been through so much on the last 5 years and it finally came to an ended 2 weeks ago. I require therapy re-adapt but I can't leave home for now to seek said help

Anonymous 22996

I've been playing league of legends, I have a heavy need to get into gold but I go on these massive win/loss streaks that make me lose/gain multiple ranks. I'm getting sick of it. Besdies that I've been playing rimworld, but I'll sit down, play that and lose 12 hours of my life before I know it. That shit is addictive.

Hmmmm, well it's hard, I was in your place for a while but with displaying emotion. I had a time in my life where everything was bad and I shut down emotionally so I wouldn't commit suicide and it took a lot of personal work and reflection to work through it and break through the walls I put up that made me emotionless. I mean in the end I can't say don't try relationships, but I fear for you getting hurt or quickly attached to someone in an unexpected surge of emotion and you're just kinda left devastated and heartbroken. Your first heartbreak is always the worst, and since you're just trying to get in touch with your romantic side, it can really turn you off of romance for a while and that's an awful thing. Perhaps you just don't understand the motivations because you never felt like what it's like to be in love, when viewing the actions of someone whose in live objectively it always feels pathetic and stupid, but being in love and understanding it, you can see why people do these things.

Anonymous 22997

Source on the video?

Anonymous 22999

I guess I’m exaggerating a bit when I talk about running out of time. I just had a talk with my friends recently where we talked about how many years we have until we start getting married, have kids, etc. It really freaked me out considering I’m at level 0 when it comes to these things.

I’ve been thinking about making a tinder to try out for a bit just to put myself out there. I know a boyfriend probably won’t come out of it but i might be able to make more progress than I am now.

Anonymous 23009

>And on that topic, how likely would it be to find a partner through an online game? Lots of gamers are lonely people in my experience.

no thanks; at-least actively searching for a partner starting with the "gamer" filter

1) gaming itself is much more mainstream and accepted as hobby than it was even at the start of the decade and across all areas (IE people who look like me aren't assumed to only be into playing Sims or mobile farming games). Therefore you can't exactly pigeonhole the "gamer" label so as to only fit a specific demographic/group with their stereotypical traits (anti-social/anxious/solitary) as they come from all walks of life; albeit there are certain genres/types of games that attract certain demographics more than others

2) expanding on the 2nd thing, what counts as a "gamer"? Generally speaking though the only people who care too much about that concept itself (the label) tend to fall into the classic demographic and resulting negative stereotypes (hardcore). Though if we just mean "anyone who has a passive interest in interactive media" than congrats more than 80% of the young population is "gamer" (casual). And the traits you mentioned (loneliness/anxiety/solitude) are also rising and are much more prevalent amongst young-people, some of which can be attributed to gamer.

3) lots of "self-proclaimed gamer" humor consists of yelling "n* f**" in ingame mic. These are common in shooters/class-based multiplayer games. Likewise historical strategy games tend to attract poltical radicals of differing spectrums wondering "why dont people get me and my abstract political thoughts" (IRL I dont like to associate with those type of people for numerous reasons). It's not so much about the content of the toxic chat itself that matters but just not wanting to associate with negative people whose only goal is to offend others. Thanks to chan-type gamers (hardcore) who cant stop repeating the same humor over and over again that you can now be banned for spelling "dabbing" backwards in game. A suitable romantic partner dont you reckon (hardcore)?

4) the main medium to add strangers-gamers ingame and expand a online-relationship is through steam/discord. The latter of which is filled with with high-school-tier drama by people who never even set foot in a high-school in over 5+ years (scary). Perhaps this app causes otherwise normal-mature people to lose their maturity and resulting sanity.

5) while the days and drama of the early-2000s MMO-grill with 10+ admirers on her guild are (thankfully) over with, there is still a sense of scorn if you reveal yourself to these gamer spaces; even if it's just """"ironic humor""" making a sarcastic overtone of the previous tropes mentioned. More serious is the suspicion that you are the type of person that vents 20 hours daily on twitter over wanting to censor gamer fan-service. Though some genres are are fairly casual with the appearance of a girl being brushed off and ignored; others arent (tactical shooters, RTS games etc) though thankfully these aren't really dependent on VC so everyone just assumes I am a guy (which I dont mind, but makes me cautious about wanting to do a #4 and add them on steam).

I have and still wish for a partner sharing common interests with me not due to selfishness and not wanting to expand my current interests but because I really want to avoid a relationship like that of my paternal grandparents where they don't seem to have any common interests and the few time "alone-time" they have amongst themselves is fairly boring and depressing. "Gamer" (along with cooking) seems like one of those low-cost hobbies/interests that seems very nice to explore with a partner with each other sharing their tastes and spending time partaking in said activity together. Thankfully though most guys are into gaming and its not exactly a scavenger hunt for a specific one into gaming as opposed to just meeting any type of guy and then moving on from there to discuss said interests/hobbies.

TLDR since most guys are already into games it's better to not focus into searching for a partner based solely on being into games as opposed to focusing first on other traits you care about.

Anonymous 23010

Pretty assumptive. I don't wear makeup or post on Instagram. I was severely neglected and sometimes beaten as a child for not being feminine, as I grew up in a cultish religious household. I still hold my view despite not being validated for it, and being practically disowned by my family.

Anonymous 23014

>tfw see a couple where the girl is taller and they seem to have a gfd dynamic by how they're interacting
That's so wholesome but also god I wish that were me.

Anonymous 23023

Sage for ot, but I felt this was relevant.
The most success I've ever had meeting people without needing to initially organize was through Meetup. (https://meetup.com)
Its a local activities filter (best way to describe it), and not a dating app, but I've met a reasonable number of single guys (and girls) through it.
If you're feeling lonely or just need to get out that's the first place I suggest going to.

Anonymous 23028


My friend sent me this and I feel personally attacked

Anonymous 23029

Is it because they are calling you fat while having poor taste in men?

Anonymous 23033


Thank you anon! Looks like there's a few interesting things to do in my area so I can get out of the house and stop being so depressed.

Anonymous 23034

>poor taste in men?
Just this part you bully

Anonymous 23041

I mean I was just wondering, I mean I wouldn't feel attacked by being told what I'm into. But I'll feel attacked if I'm being called fat. Bitches be jealous that some people can find things desirable that they don't view as desirable.

Anonymous 23076

Any suggestions for finding a bf online? I just want an introverted but successful bf to have a family with. I tried some dating sites but i cant find anyone i click with. And IRL is scary and stressful. I'm not in uni and don't plan to go.

Anonymous 23078

But I want an introverted guy who also doesn't like going outside.

Anonymous 23080

Sorry i dont understand
Are you saying such a site cant exist because of that reason
I dont think im an easy mark im actually really picky i just want a really introverted guy but whos not a mean incel
Arent some sites at least better than others? Like i dont want to use tinder and stuff

Anonymous 23082

I guess that makes sense
It sucks that it has to be so difficult because some people want to ruin it for everyone
I guess i could find some hobbies and find communities for them

Anonymous 23085

What happened with discord?
Im not really into books that much but i was just looking at some discords for other stuff
I feel like i like guys who are into masculine hobbies though which i wouldnt be into
Lol i actually joined an r9k discord and they have a rule that females are allowed but its dont ask dont tell. It seems to work okay

Anonymous 23095

>stare at a guy whenever in his presence at uni because he's top tier qt
>he straight up fucking approached me and asked why today
He thought I was giving him a mean look feels bad. I probably blew it because I escaped to my bus right away. I could have made it right and said "no it's because you're cute" and perhaps made a move but no. I said "you dress well." Kms.

Tfw he was also one of the first boys I took creepshots of…romantic. I just have no social skills, sorry d00d.

Anonymous 23097

Yeah nevermind I made a clean escape. Found his social media (we exchanged first names) and we are very different types of people.
I'll be sure to be more careful about my staring from here on out.

I wish men would stop disappointing me but it just keeps happening.

Anonymous 23098

Jesus Christ, this conversation chain. Just try it anon, this other person is so god damn picky about the person you should go after. They are on a dead as fuck off shoot of a 2chan clone, this person isn't well off and has insane expectations of what people deserve of who post on here and what they deserve as a lover.

As for suggestions, just make yourself available, it's going to be a painful process no matter where you go because it's just gonna be a bunch of retards telling you what you want to hear to date you because they are desperate. Just keep your guard up and make sure you're wary of who you interact with, that's the best advice I can give you. But the fact you require a "successful" bf is going to make people give you shit because it sounds like you're a gold digger/looking to leech.

Anonymous 23101

It's a bit excessive, you aren't going to find someone whose perfect. It's always ideal to find that perfect someone, but it's a lot harder to do and it just beats you down when you hold everyone up to the ideal standard and they all fall short.

Realistically we should all treat each other nicely regardless of gender/whatever else. But there are just some nice losers out there who have been beaten down by life and all they want is someone but they get overlooked because they aren't well off. And also while there should be a barrier to keep shitty people out, there are sometimes good people who are genuine to that personality, but they are gated because of people who pretend. All I'm saying is, keep it open. Don't shut out everyone, always be open to that chance, because it might come from somewhere you don't expect.

Anonymous 23106

I think you just looked for a reason to feel disappointed with him because you embarrassed yourself before him.

Anonymous 23110

Nah, he supports that rainbow haired pedo rapper (trapper?). I don't fuck with that. Even if you come at me with "it was just cp for the younger one uwu and the girl he fucked was 17!!" the fact still stands I don't approve of that so don't try.

I probably could have fixed things upon a second interaction but can't be assed now.

Anonymous 23112

It's shallow to judge people entirely on musical taste.

Anonymous 23113

It's not the taste, my taste is garbage sometimes, just that he's supporting a LIVING pedo. Even a dead one is iffy for me tbh. But he's straight up giving this fool money.
If I'm giving up enjoying John K's work then whoever I date would have to be the type to give up their pervs, too. I want to date a person with similar values.

Anonymous 23114

Im okay with it being a process as long as im not wasting my time
I know. Im not a gold digger or materialistic at all but i guess people might take it that way. Maybe i should think more about what i could contribute. I feel like some guys want to take care of a girl
Thanks for the encouragement anon :)
Eww!!! I wouldnt even date a guy who listened to that trash!!!

Anonymous 23116

So you are going to deprive yourself of things you enjoy because of bullshit politics that don't matter for shit to anything or anyone. What a sad life you must live to do shit like that, just like jehovah witness assholes who deprive themselves of celebrating any holiday because that's blasphemy to enjoy anything. There's just no point to it, life is shit enough, stop shitting on your own life, you might loosen up a bit.

Anonymous 23117

>child molestation is politics
Fuck. Are you a shotacon anon or some true crime fangirl? Lmao.
Clearly we also don't have similar values. Have a nice day, I won't argue with you anymore because no agreement will ever be met.

Anonymous 23118

I think it matters if a guy you're (potentially) talking to supports trashy, ghetto child molesters. Not only is he a piece of shit, he's a groupie, and I'm not even sure which of the two is more pathetic.

Anonymous 23119

The quality of this board has very quickly gone to shit, I wonder why.

Anonymous 23121

Yikes, I knew some of you were incredibly small minded when it came to men but this is something else. It's not even the fact of the artist in question, it's that this shit was already done almost 20 years ago and when he died, they still played marathons of his songs in honor of his death and still have songs on the radio today. If you're living in this age and still haven't been able to separate the idea of what someone makes versus the person themselves, then you are really small minded and these acts of depriving yourself of things you enjoy thinking that you're saving children or stopping molestation, that's a joke. You're doing nothing, and that's the most annoying part of all of this. There is absolutely no positive impact from these actions.

Also side note, talking about an artist doesn't make you a groupie. That's called having an interest and being a person, are you people so two dimensional that you can't even enjoy things in life without having them define you and your values to the core? Fuck that's sad.

Anonymous 23122

6ix9ine isn't dead lmao, are you okay? Neither is John K.
I will take the label of retarded sjw if it pleases you, MJ fan anon. Since it seems that's who you're referencing?

Anonymous 23123

Well sorry for having standards. I would never date a guy who was so morally low that he wasn't bothered by trashy celebrity culture, much less supporting specific trashy child molesting "artists".

Anonymous 23130

Tbh id rather be a nightstand with lots of kids early than have a career if i had to pick one

Anonymous 23148

>incredibly adorable manlet from one of my classes has shared several stares and smiles with me all semester
>he's always alone in the same place almost every day
>decide to track him down on the class list on a whim to find pics of him
>he actually seems quite relaxed and like we'd get along
I have one day left this semester…I might try to connect with him tomorrow. I wish I hadn't left it so fucking long.
Wish me luck!

Anonymous 23149

>I have one day left this semester
Why does everyone do this? Just say something already! Don't wait for the "moment". Do it!

Anonymous 23150

Im in the exact same situation, except tomorrow Im going to leave early to catch the train home and never see him again, haha!

what subject are you doing anon?

Anonymous 23152

idk anon, I was busy being distracted by other little men because I thought he was out of my league (he has lovely doe eyes). But he noticed me around early March and I only recently realized "fuck!! I've got a chance!!"

Oh no, can you catch a later train? I'd feel extra confident if I knew another miner at some other place on the Earth was also approaching a guy haha. Will you see him during the exams? Perhaps try to finish early and wait outside for him? That's my backup.

And I'm studying business, but we're in a shared math class so I have no idea if our paths will ever cross again. What are you studying? Is this your last year (if you'll never see him again)?

Anonymous 23153

Im studying maths lol. my train already booked an paid for so I cant change it. Im kind of glad tbh, Im a big coward and so stressed I want to get back to my family asap. I have another year so we might see each other then but I think any connection we had would have faded by october after not seeing eachother for months

Anonymous 23154

>studying maths
That's neat, I always admired pure math majors.
It's sad that it will have to end like that, anon. I hope you get to relax and have fun with your family this summer anyway.

Anonymous 23155

thanks :) I hope you manage to talk to him and you hit it off. good luck anon

Anonymous 23157

Im sorry to say this, but I actually really hate maths lol. its just my only natural talent and I used it as my golden ticket to leave NEETdom

Anonymous 23160

Pls no bully me indirectly anon, I'm still here.

Anonymous 23162

tbf I do kind of agree, I think it attracts extroverts who are either there to party and half-ass a degree or are fake, self-centered type-a's (the type involved in student life shit. idk how it is elsewhere but most people in our student union are business majors it's crazy).

Most likely I won't interact with those people too much later in my degree since I'm majoring in accounting though. They tend to be more in finance/marketing/general from what I can tell.

Anonymous 23173

>tfw he didn't show up today
Jesus christ.
It's probably for the best since I've been intending to take a break from relentlessly pursuing men after the last fiasco. RIP though.

Anonymous 23174

I have no idea, I just tend to follow the path of least resistance really. Id love to do the #vanlife meme and go around south europe doing rock climbing, but I dont know if thats realistic lol. and yeah. business is known as the degree you pick when you just want student loan money to fund your partying here


khan academy on youtube can be your bf anon :'^)

rip. I saw my guy this morning. we had a group presentation and his group was waiting to go in as my group left. didnt talk to him tho. now Im on my way to the station

Anonymous 23180

Goddammit, anons.

Anonymous 23185

Are you home now anon? And are you actually the same anon who was hoping to be in a group with her classmate a few weeks ago? I know this board is tiny.

I know.
Before our math exam I'm going to try and locate him in the crowd and make my move, maybe say "hey you seem interesting do you want to chat after this exam and hang out maybe after they're all over?"

I feel like it must be done.

Anonymous 23186

It has to be. Don't let this slip!

Anonymous 23374

>tfw this boy will be leaving the exam room within the next 10 minutes
Nervousposting or else I'd be sitting my pants lmao. I wonder if he's been expecting this? I hope he says yes to lunch.


Was this meant as a reply to me..? We have techie anons here but I'm not one.

Anonymous 23376

We don't get along but I'm glad I took the chance. We didn't exchange social media so I assume he doesn't like me.
Shrug. He seems nice though, I hope everything works out for him.

Anonymous 23377

I meant math major anon.
Cryptography is sorta a hobby of mine.

Anonymous 23390

Well, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
It was worth the effort. And you’ll be more prepared for the next guy you want to approach

Anonymous 23445

>not mentally and physically prepared for a relationship
>if I manage to change completely it will take years
>I'll be way too old for anyone to like me
I think it's better to just give up.

Anonymous 23447

Me again. I'm still intensely lonely. tfw no bf. I'm falling in love with anon guys who post nice things.

Anonymous 23461

Don't give up, anon.

Anonymous 23463

I wouldn’t worry, I think a lot of people are in the same boat.

Anonymous 23575

sorry for the late reply, I didnt bring my pc home with me so I havent been using the internet. yeah Im the anon with the group projects too lol. Im much more relaxed now Im here and have barely thought about whats been going on at uni, although my mum is sick rn so thats a bit shit

Im glad you talked to your guy. even if it didnt work out, the fact you were brave enough to talk to him was great. as long as you can put yourself out there like that, eventually you'll find someone

sorry. I havent done any crytography, apart from a couple of super basic exercises in one of my meme modules

Anonymous 23591

I tried smiling at guys today, one of them smiled back. Made me happy.

Anonymous 23593

Good job, anon.

Anonymous 23751


Friendly reminder why Machamp is best bf

Anonymous 23765

What a pointless item.

Anonymous 23811

Needs more jpeg

Also "powerful statement about consent" like 90% of date rapist don't go bareback or stealth the girl anyway ok.

Anonymous 23846

He was falsely accused of sexual assault

Anonymous 23847

stop having ugly feet then

Anonymous 23858

are all the guys with big penises actually big dicks themselves?

Anonymous 23866

That's all you deserve if you care so much about dick size

Anonymous 23868

monkeys paw

Anonymous 23873

get a good boy with an average dick and make him enlarge his penis

Anonymous 23899

yes, that's why they're attractive
guys who are nice are trying to make up for their lack of dick

Anonymous 23908

This anon lives in a world entirely different from normies. Woke.

As payback for all the guys who advise their girlfriends to get boob jobs?

Anonymous 23911

literally nothing wrong with boobjobs, penis enlargement is a thing so if you manage to gain trust on a guy and want a big dick bf you can have your cake and eat it too

Anonymous 23959

Why are there so few boys with glasses? It's not fair. This is literally the ony requirement I have (besides the age, obviously), and still, I can't find any.
I feel so guilty because there are two guys kind of interested in me, but they are both overweight and don't wear glasses.

Anonymous 23961

You're kidding right? You must live in a special region with low myopia because half of the US wears glasses. If you do live in a region with low myopia please describe it because I am curious what sort of conditions selected for regular 20/20 vision in this day and age.

Anonymous 23962

I live in Europe. From what I found, around 1/4th of population in my country wears glasses, but they are mostly women and elderly people.
I should also mention that my degree is around 85-90% women, and among those 10-15% only one man wears glasses. He is also gay.

Anonymous 23963

What degree are you in? This is actually a cool little epidemiology lesson. I'm sorry if I'm taking away from your glasses bf search.

Anonymous 23964

Well, I hope none of my friends lurk here, but it's law. Why did you need that information?

Anonymous 23966

Because I'm curious what degree would have such low rates of myopia. And I am super surprised it's law. I would've considered reading legal documents would have a lot of near sighted people. And I would have expected a lot more men in your field too. At least 50%.

Anonymous 23967

I think most people in my degree who have visual impairment wear contact lenses, especially men. And yeah, the gender ratio was shocking to me as well. I guess it's related to the fact that fewer and fewer men decide to go to university. In my country requirement process is strictly exam based (as opposed to USA, when other factors may be more important), and women tend to do way better in them than men. Sorry for ot.

Anonymous 23968

Well if I can say, great work for getting into law. I know it is a prestigious field of work, and I imagine it takes a good amount of preparation to do well on those tests. I would try to find you a glasses bf if I could, but we are on opposite sides of the ocean unfortunately.

Anonymous 23969


I met a shy and gentle guy who wants to date me. But I feel hesitant to get involved with him knowing that he will just contribute to my social isolation because he has no friends either. More than a boyfriend I always wanted to have a support network.

Anonymous 23972

how attractive is red hair to the average girl? ive never heard one girl say its a good quality to have

Anonymous 23973

I think woman can pull off red hair just fine, but if you are looking for people from the community, I think there is a lesbian/bi section in /feels/ if you search for it.

Anonymous 23984

Its from Monster Girl Quest.

Anonymous 23985

Yeah he doesn't really want to make friends. He says he only needs a girlfriend and no one else in the world is necessary.

Anonymous 23990

I think more than being dependent he just has a very low social need. At least according to himself.

What kind of professional help would he need?

Anonymous 24001

So you just created a whole mental profile from just one thing he had said? Am I the only one that thinks it's stupid? It could as well come from being some kind of insufferable romantic or not being confident with his social skills, maybe he even didn't really mean it and just wanted to say something like
>you're more important to me uwu
People are not that simple and you're not that smart.

Anonymous 24003

I'm the one being courted. I understood that I'm not providing all the information so no advice can be accurate to my situation, but I appreciated the perspective anyway.

Anonymous 24011

Im like this, I dont care about making friends, but I do want a relationship, and only interacting with one person is enough for me. I find it weird how unlikely you think this is without it being a sign of something worse… is it really a red flag? tbh youre making me feel worried about it lol


I dont know why but I really like "ugly" glasses. like the ones poor kids used to get on the nhs in to 90s

Anonymous 24013

where are you getting this from anon? if this is all well accepted common knowledge in psychology then fair enough, but from my own anecdotal experience this is wrong

it seems like you're saying people with a "low social need" are more likely to have shallow relationships, but be okay with doing so with many people. so quantity over quality? but in my experience it's the opposite, they dislike interacting with many people and would prefer fewer, but more meaningful relationships?

Anonymous 24016

I think the idea that most introverts want to branch out but cant is incorrect, there are plenty who are happy not branching out at all and I wouldn't call them ill-adjusted

I can see someone like that being slightly clingy (not necessarily so much that it becomes a problem) but I can also see them being not clingy at all. someone who has been happy alone before being in a relationship isn't going to suddenly become dependent on there partner once they are in a relationship

Anonymous 24018

You do realize most people when they get married often agree to the terms of "My lover will provide me with all the companionship I need." The notion of this isn't really bad nor anything alarming, this is pretty normal human behavior, some people can stand to be alone and only need their romantic partner. This whole profile you drew up is just assumptions based on red flag stories you hear on lifetime or some subreddit.

Anonymous 24019

Yes it is, I used to think like this and was unhealthily needy when I got a boyfriend. No one that is mentally healthy will want just one person.

Anonymous 24021

even if Im mostly happy currently with no friends? I dont want to make "friends" I dont even like being around just to have a bf lol

Anonymous 24022

It's fine, don't listen to the normies. This is just normies trying to push their idea of what normalcy is on people. If you don't do what they do, you're a mentally ill weirdo who needs help so you can live your life like theirs. Not everyone is wired the same way, some people are more sociable than others. Legit as long as you don't interfere with the other person's desire to have a social life as long as they don't neglect you (I'm talking like out almost every night and never spending time with you.) and it doesn't impact the relationship, it's fine.

Anonymous 24023

I'm the furthest from a normie and I disagree. Humans are just social creatures, maybe if you have autism or something you won't have as many social needs, but other than that it won't be normal.

Anonymous 24025

you can't lern jap…

I think a lot of people, well people on fringe sites like this anyways, have made bad experiences with people. They've only met people they could not connect with and as such think that all people are bad. They aren't, but man is it finding hard nice people, if you live in a smaller town or fall for the wage meme it might as well be impossible.

Anonymous 24026

You're a literal normie if you push this agenda. Humans are dynamic beings with are very different from one another. Trying to put all humans in such a basic "All humans are X" thing including when it comes to personality/interactions is just ignorant. Their mere environment of which they were raised in changes their whole way of thought and approach to things. To pretend just because the norm is that people like to interact that if you don't like to interact you're autistic or mentally ill. This notion is insane and you need to stop pushing it, it's horrifically ingorant and shows you know nothing about humans at all nor the simple fact that not everyone is made the same way.

Anonymous 24029

thank you. fucking normies reeeeee lol

I havent had any bad experiences with people, and I dont think theyre bad, I just have no desire to interact with almost any of them and find doing so mildly unpleasant

Anonymous 24030

The point I'm making is that a desire to not socalize is not a consistent tell tale sign of mental illness. All of you are implying that if you don't have a desire for human interaction and socalization you are mentally ill which is incorrect. While some mental illnesses like depression will manifest in this way. You are trying to correlate a symptom of a mental illness as a consistent thing to show mental illness which isn't true.

Aversion to socialization isn't always a sign of mental illness so please stop telling people that they are mentally ill. This goes for all that are participating in this topic. You aren't a doctor, you have had no personal interaction with said person nor can you make a diagnosis. All you are doing is making other people feel self conscious that they prefer different things than the rest of everyone else and that's not cool.

Anonymous 24036

>Ehhh… I did take a strong stance based on little hard evidence, I grant that.
And now you're constructing a theory based on little hard evidence. I don't mean to be rude but you seem to be extremely ignorant. Also you use terms which are very debatable in terms of semantics so I can hardly understand what do you mean.

>Do we care about how other people feel? Or do we care about how we feel about their feelings? E.g. I want you to calm down and stop being sad/upset/angry.

I'm curious how do you differentiate between those two
>A well adjusted introvert who wants friends but doesn’t like approaching stranger, eventually accepts that they cannot fulfill their social needs with only one person and will branch out. An introvert who isn’t well adjusted is intensely clingy.
That's a completely bullshit statement not backed by anything
>"only needs a girlfriend" is particularly worrying because most people who have "very low social need" & Are not mentally ill would not feel that way
Another bullshit statement
>In addition — some people inherently struggle with learning how to socialize — or grew up isolated and never learned how — or struggle with social anxiety. These people want to branch out but struggle to do so. That’s called being an introvert.
That's the first time I see such definition. I always saw it as a desire to express emotions, not connected to social skills.
>So because he “needs” a girlfriend and only a girlfriend - we can likely infer that he has emotional problems as as is common in ill-adjusted introverts.
No, we can't because your theory about "ill-adjust introverts" is just your presumptions and nothing else.

Now, I might be wrong here so if you're not from Central Asia please ignore what follows.
Get the fuck out you kazakh schizo. Your pseudo-intelectialism is just a defence mechanism, you even once admitted it yourself. All you do is finding excuses for being a loser and posting those inconsistent ramblings nobody gives a shit about so you could convince yourself that you're enlightened and woke but nobody else in the world believes it. At least don't do it here

Anonymous 24037

I mean I'll agree to the point that sometimes people live in a world where they think they are normal everyone else is wrong but they are the wrong one and this can be a hard thing to break out of.

Here's the thing about the whole blind thing. This is going a bit on personal experiences/feelings but, I've been forced to socialize many times, I have in this case referencing the metaphor "seen with my eyes" and I didn't care for it. You're right people should experience things before saying they don't like it, but in the same vein, this is socialization, it's very hard to not have experienced this in some way or another and not draw a conclusion to it by the age of 18+.

But you're right to an extent, I mean mental illness can dull the joy of social interaction if you're unwilling to look on it but sometimes, it just not for people, they don't feel like they belong anywhere but by their lonesome shitposting with a small amount of friends or people online and only desiring that deep emotional connection that you can get from a lover, that casual interaction or limited socialization can't provide.

Besides all that.
>It's good to take time to reflect and question yourself about why you think and live the way you do. And consider whether you could do better some other way?
Yes, it's always good you reflect on yourself, your life and if you're really happy where you are or if this is a happiness derived from complacency and being comfortable with this being your norm.

Anonymous 24041

One, that part is meant for a specific person so if that's not you the pseudo-intelectialism doesn't refer to you. I wrote it half-jokingly.

Anonymous 24163

I wish I could get a nice boyfriend. How to get one? Should I ask out random people? I thought about joining a club related to my interests (weebshit and literature), but there are no men in those clubs.
Maybe my standards are too high? I wouldn't want to date a lolicon or someone mainly attracted to teenagers, or someone with mysoginistic tendencies. Should I maybe lower them a little?

Anonymous 24174

>see cute boy
>ask out
Please do this, anon. You fail once, you try again.

Anonymous 24210

Christ that metric is way off. But I'm sure there was men in that club, but I'm sure in the casual style of mostly everyone of this board who thinks they deserve someone 10x of a higher value than they are themselves, they looked over all the undesirables that are often in anime clubs which populate a majority of weeb clubs. There is no such thing as a non-male weeb club.

Anonymous 24225

Sorry, I should be more precise. There were no single men in those clubs. Out of 12 members, 9 were women, 3 men. All three men were already in relationship/married. I don't think it's nice to comment that I expect someone better looking than me. I don't have any expectations or standards in regards to looks. I also wonder where did you get that 90% statistic from. As far as I am aware, even in America that ratio is close to 50:50. Where I live mostly women buy manga and engage in weeb fandoms.

Anonymous 24228

>I don't think it's nice to comment that I expect someone better looking than me.
You'll hear that a lot on this board if you say you're single but want a boyfriend. No idea where it comes from. It's not like you said or even implied that you're looking for someone who makes 6 figures or is 2 heads taller.

Anonymous 24229

I think it's because those posters are men.

Anonymous 24234

Get a Tinder or OkCupid and write about being a kawaii gamer girl who is also a feminist, then pick one of the 200 nerds who match you.
Male nerds in the real world aren't nearly as sexist as 4chan would lead you to believe.

Anonymous 24239

Or they just know how easy it is to get a bf if you lower your standards.

Anonymous 24256

As it stands my standards are:
>into either weebshit or literature
>not underage or 10+ years older than me
>likes me
>wants to be in monogamous romantic relationship (so no friends with benefits)
Which standars should I lower/drop then? Maybe age?

Unfortunately, being a feminist in my country is like admitting to hating to being stuck-up man-hater. The first 20 matches were interested in either just "casual meetings" (sex) or casual dating (of course casual sex is okay but being a feminist is awful lol). After that I uninstalled the app. Idk, maybe I should try more, you are right.

Anonymous 24259

>Going to those posters must be men!
I don't think you realize how many bitches are on this website with an holier than thou personality who pretend perfectly acceptable men don't exist so they can bitch about being 5ever alone and how all the good men are gone. Then when you press they are still there, they finally show their standards for a "good man" and it's so high it's actually disgusting. Happens way more than you expect.

Anonymous 24261

Are you saying anon who just wants a monogamous relationship with someone her age who isn't a pedo has disgustingly high standards, then? lmao

My standards are far higher than hers: I want him to shower regularly.
I know it's a bit out there, but that's the bar.

Anonymous 24264

You're using context that wasn't provided at the time of the statement dummy. The context I was given was "No men are in anime club" which is utter 100% bullshit. It is impossible for there to not be a single male person in an anime club unless it's somehow magically advertised as a girls only club which would totally defeat the purpose of the original person's motivation for going.

Thus you come to the assumption that they just decided to pretend that all the males that were there didn't exist. Like what most stuck up bitches do when saying they can't find someone. When I got further context I see the reason she left them out wasn't because she found them undesirable, but because they were taken. I just knee jerked it the other way because a majority of the time, it's the other versus a magical land where autistic gross man-children don't infest the anime club and make it a land of XD-inducing antics that are neither funny as an adult or even welcomed.

Yes I'm a weeb snob, I've spent a lot of time in anime clubs, and most of them they have no fucking chill and it's pretty gross. I just wanted to talk passionately about dumb fantasy shit, not see young adults act like children while they all ignore the show on the screen. Legit felt like I was in a day care that smelled worse depending on who you sat next to.

Anonymous 24318

This is the first time I've ever posted on this site, but I've been lurking for a while now. I just wanted to say that this is a really good and important post.

Anonymous 24452

maybe that attitude is why you have no social connections in the first place

Anonymous 24491

>find forum for manlets
>so many complaints about women only dating taller
>still no short bf on my arm

Anonymous 24502

Just find one, smack him over the head, and carry him back to your lair. It's easy.

Anonymous 24507

4'10"-5'4" with a preference for the lower end (I'm 5'6").

NO! I can't hurt the boys!
…without consent.

Anonymous 24512

Come on, I'm a bit self-conscious about my height. I wish I was 6'.
I'm not a proper womanlet where I live though, just slightly above average for a lady.

Anyway being mostly medium you'd think I wouldn't scare manlets away and yet here we are.

Anonymous 24557

Sorry if you're a big and tall anon feeling that way then.

It's far from what I want though, I'm also a bit of a heavier and strong lady and want to be the one lifting and carrying my bf. That's why I'm into tiny men lmao.

If you're tall I guess we envy each other lol?

Anonymous 24570

He'll consent later (through force).

Anonymous 24588

use the metric system

Anonymous 24629

You don't need to be tall in order to be mature, anon. It's all in the mind. If you simple are mature, people will know.

Anonymous 24688


I feel kinda sad because i'm now in a long distance relationship with a guy who is 4000km away from me, he's in the US and i'm in a south american country. He's nice but I feel that he's too immature for me, we are the same age (20) but I noticed that he still thinks in a kinda childish way, like he can be and do whatever he wants and that the world is for him, maybe is something that people in the first world thing (correct me if I'm wrong please), we will meet in person in august and even when I'm looking forward to that I dont feel so great because it will be with his parents and it seems that they won't let him to come to my country since for them everything that is not Europe or US is dangerous. While he has to beg to his parents to let him go out later than 9 pm I can go to whatever I want whenever I want (but I don't do it because I prefer to stay at home). He's nice but im kinda regreting of everything.
Now I really think that long distance is not a good option at all, you miss a lot of things because you're not with that person irl.
Also I feel a lot of envy because my best friend, she has a lovely boyfriend who is always nice with her, loves her, take her out everytime that she wants, really cares about her dreams and helps her with every challange that she has, I'm happy for her too but that's everything that i've been looking for and no matter how much I try I can't find no one irl that I like.
Anyone else who tried long distance and regret it but also can't find someone irl?
Sorry for the bad english.

Anonymous 24693

How old is your best friend? I've found that LDRs can actually be reasonably successful with older couples (late 20s or early 30s).

Relationships in your early 20s tend to be a bit more unpredictable, and I don't think that's an issue that's exclusive to LDRs.

That being said, I still think it's worth giving it a shot. It sounds like he might be a bit sheltered, but that isn't a trait that can't be fixed with age or more exposure to the world. It's going to depend on how receptive he is to that and how much his parents have him under their thumb.

Anonymous 24848

I can go on a rant of ideas I have but here's a tl;dr from personal experience with a guy I had.

Fear rules people, in the first world all people do is work tirelessly for underpaid wages to barely get anything nice for a luxury and due to how hard it is to get nice things, terrible people take an easy way out through lawsuits where they get free money by allowing a terrible thing to happen to them and pretend it ruined their life. They lie and will do awful things for money even if it means runing another's life. So everyone acts cautious to the point where they will ruin interpersonal relationships including around people they don't know well. And also depending on the boy, they will deeply fear the notion of a false rape charge. Those ruin lives of men who didn't do it and there's always some article about someone coming out 10 years after they lost their life in jail to apologize for lying about the rape charge.

It's all fear mongering shit that happens, maybe not as likely, but if it does it ruins a life and trying to rebuild a ruined life in the first world, might as well kill yourself. You can't even live on minimum wage alone in the USA.

Anonymous 25197

>I just want a cute successful bf but I'm a weird looking incel on crystal.cafe
yes, and I wanna locate sasquatch

Anonymous 25226

My best friend is 20 years old like me.
I think my boyfriend is nice but I as the time pass my feelings for him too. I have never been with someone so unaware of life and lately he has been feeling very insecure because he thinks I'm more mature and smarter than him, since he always had the idea that he have to be the one who is smarter and funnier. Other think that I don't like is that he doesn't have any more references than youtubers to his life, every time that he compares someone he does it with a youtuber, he really aspires to being a youtuber too, every time that he doesn't have an idea for his channel he just turn veeery mad, like almost crying, I told him if he wants to have ideas que has to read more books, see movies, listen to more music and things that like that, and he just gets mad because he doesn't want to do it. Also, he's always asking me for doing sexting but I really don't feel comfortable when i do it. His parents always listen to our conversations and his mom even joined without asking. I don't think that my boyfriend is a bad person, I just think that he's very immature, he really reminds me to the 14 years old boys that I tutor. I don't know what to do, I could just break up with him but I already have the tickets to meet him in person.

Anonymous 25227

He does sound a bit immature. Does he have any career aspirations or does he just want to be a youtuber? What are things you like about him?

Anonymous 25252

It's always hard when you are in a relationship, but ask yourself the question: Do you want to be in a relationship with a child?

Anonymous 25288

I saw him today

after our calculus test

I am so alone

Anonymous 25292

first year uni course. hes cute and bit awkward

Anonymous 25293

>another anon meeting a cute and shy boy

Anonymous 25294

I was too afraid to talk to him. also low energy because of the exam so I just speed walked home

Anonymous 25297

AAAAAAH! Just slam against each other, already! Just take him by the hand, and smile at him.

Anonymous 25323

it trigger me too when people say things like that. most of the time when i hear americans/west europeans whining about how poor they are, the things they complain about would be considered average/above average pretty much anywhere else lmao, and i dont exactly live in a poor country either.

Anonymous 25377

I'm getting too old to meet someone, I'm really going to be alone forever.
I don't know what point there is in staying alive when finding someone to dedicate my life to has been my goal for ages.

I'm just inherently unlikable I think.

Anonymous 25378

Are you one of the anons that want a shy bf? Because if you are, you have to be the one to chase them, it's highly unlikely they'll approach you (in a sensible time frame).

Anonymous 25382

I am, and I've approached a good amount of men. But no one ever likes me as a person. They say yes out of courtesy and some men have even found me cute, but I'm just unlikable.

Realistically I'm not super old like I opened with, but I feel too old to be a khv. It's embarrassing that I can't get a boyfriend. And sad.

Anonymous 25407

There's always hobbies and online dating. Sometimes you just need to keep trying.

Anonymous 25413

You're not too old right now, anon. Keep trying, and try harder.

Anonymous 25634

I had a bf once. I ended it because I was rly messed up in the head at the time and didn't have the emotional capacity for anything, so I had no feelings for him.

he was sweet and really cared about me and was ok with my strange/uncomfortable quirks. now that I'm better, I'm afraid I missed out on something really good.

Anonymous 25694

It was my birthday recently.
Sometimes I read posts here that make me feel old, or at least remind me of my own age.
Getting that christmas cake feeling.

Anonymous 25725

Dunno if this thread or the other is the best place to ask, but I'm here to gather more insight on a discussion I had.

Do you prefer boys younger or older than you? Could even be by as much as a week, or a significant number of years, and why?

Anonymous 25739

I like 1-3 years younger because I'm a GFDfag and age gives a tiny bit more authority. Not opposed to 2-3 years in the other direction if he's right for me in every other way though.

That said I actually once asked out a man 8 years my senior by accident lmao. If I'd known I wouldn't have, but he looked young (small, big eyes, decent skin, full head of hair).

Anonymous 25770


>tfw no tiny samerace bf
Chances are microscopic I'll find one, sadly. Especially one not fucked up…or obese.

Anonymous 25810

have children, femcels.

Anonymous 25881


Anonymous 25883

go out and get one

Anonymous 25888

Join a hobby club. Make male friends. Turn one of them into your bf.

Anonymous 25929

Do you still talk? Has he had a gf since you left? Maybe you have a chance.

I'm turning 22 in a few months. I know that's probably still considered young, but I feel I missed potential with my youth. I feel like I left it all too late. Everyone my age is either a whore or they're like me and only exist online. How do I talk to irl boys? Where do I find the ones like me? Libraries? Dog parks? I don't know.

Anonymous 25934

Go where you want to go. This is what "being yourself" lends to. What do you like? Don't lie to yourself.

[Return] [Catalog]
[ Rules / FAQ ] [ meta / b / media / img / feels / hb / x ]