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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

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i hope everyone had a wonderful day and if you didnt i hope tomorrow will be better Anonymous 120601[Reply]

:)

Anonymous 120614

thank you kitty. how sweet.

Anonymous 120619

>>120601
thank you nona i hope you had a wonderful day too~!

Anonymous 120635

Thanks nona, you too.


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Anonymous 120609[Reply]

I have exams in a few days and my parents were fighting like tards today. As soon as that is over one will come and fight with me. Cannot wait for college. Everytime they fight I start doom thinking that I will never be in a good marriage and I should stay alone. Why do they do this. My mother started it today. I think she likes to do it on purpose because she knows how much it hurts me.
4 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120615

I should edate …kekkeke…whats the worse that can happen

Anonymous 120616

I miss my normal life…I think people can sense that something is wrong with my family matters when they talk to me …my teachers always asked me q.s about my mother

Anonymous 120617

I will never have a bf and I will die alone just like my past life I'm doomed to be alone in every cycle it seems

Anonymous 120620

>>120609
It's hard to be born in hell, but what would complaining breed except more misery. You don't need a boyfriend to fill your hollow heart, nor any outside attention/love, but you need to love yourself, and respect yourself. That doesn't come from nothing, and indulging in instant gratification will only bury you more deeply. You feel that urge because you feel that you're hated, that you're ugly, based on the picture mirrored by your surroundings. Relief from this hell isn't outside your house's door, but outside your current self. Of course–like I said–your surroundings play a role, but if you didn't change from within you'll just be the same person in a different environment.

You can ignore your parents stupidity, and fighting with them will only breed more fights, thus misery. Ignore them like you'd ignore a barking dog, and just let them be. Give them advice when appropriate, but they will never change.

Anonymous 120628

>>120620
Thankyou nona I will reflect on this more


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Subtle Pick Me Girls Anonymous 117405[Reply]

maybe this post is stupid or redundant but I don't see this particular topic covered in much of the "pick me" discourse. I believe there is a subset of pick me girls who present in ways that don't immediately read as pick me, possibly even overtly touting feminist thought or social justice or being a "girl's girl" or the like that you can just subtly tell they're still looking for male validation, attention, possibly even go for taken men (might see this type of pick me in the "female best friend").

it's like sure they may not be tradwife Tate apologists or "im so one of the boys im le gamer gurl teehee" but there are subtle gestures or comments or you notice the content they like online or you see what they post and it just reeks of male gaze or male-centeredness. it's hard when you know they're aware enough of the pickme concept to not be overtly bitchy or competitive, but you just get this gut feeling they'd throw you under the bus anyway or try to steal your man to live out her "she wears high heels I wear sneakers" fantasy. it's the modern "cool girl" who doesn't know it's a death trap yet. the manic pixie who still thinks her magic is for attracting men. the indie/alt chick who only hangs around guys but never admits the real reason why. the artsy coworker who tries really hard to get your bfs attention outside of work. the "mom friend" who tells everyone about it, especially men she's just met. etc., etc.
43 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 119528

So what are the signs or red flags of subtle pick me women?

I think WWII veteran worship and viewing the 1950s in an overly positive way are some red flags a woman could be a pick me. Of course there could be exceptions, but its a pattern Ive noticed.

But Im sure there are other red flags that show pickmeitis, such as?

Anonymous 119751

>>118781
there's no way you're here and can actually sit through monogatari

Anonymous 119802

>>119328
>No one punches down really

most bullying is done when the ugly girl evolves or essentially 'steps up' in the social ladder like mentioned in this post >>119325

Anonymous 120594

> you see what they post and it just reeks of male gaze or male-centeredness.
You talked about subtle. Either it is not subtle, explicit pandering. Or you maybe confusing what you personally prefer with some sort of gendered gaze and maybe those just simply like things like that.

Anonymous 120608

>>119528
Worshipping and simping for men who use women and women's traumatic experiences as a costume,like girls who are into ethel cain etc


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i hate social media Anonymous 120588[Reply]

so fucking pissed rn im shadowbanned from tiktok and completely banned from twitter, its for my own good at this point but apparently pointing out mens hypocrisy is gonna cause a ww3 guys, i didnt post a single thing inciting violence it was the most tamest stuff but its ok to have literal nazis on twitter tho thats completely fine. its so obvious every site is pushing for right leaning ideas now especially twitter i miss 2015 when every site wasnt soft af

Anonymous 120589

also its completely stupid that you cant even use a vpn anymore unless you want to be banned on twitter and how tiktok pesters you to allow tracking, so does every other social media but it feels so creepy with how much personal surveillance social media demands

Anonymous 120590

>>120588
Post your post.

Anonymous 120592

>>120590
Yeah. Post here, forget about bypassers and only do content for people its meant for. I am not being ironic I think we need to bring back gatekeeping and having closed off communities to discuss relevant things because open internet has became total shit.


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Anonymous 120577[Reply]

We're all here because we're a bit weird in some way and struggle to connect to the outside world. How do you guys cope with it? I have pretty much numbed myself to the fact that other girls don't want to be my friends and even if they did I'd be lonely in my thoughts anyway being a freak and all. I don't want social advice, I just want to know how I can be more comfy going through this world alone mentally. I'm glad this site exists so I at least know there's some girls like me out there somewhere.

Anonymous 120578

I bother my sister and have started to turn her into a mini me. I use chat gpt characters …pathetic I know lol. Growing up I hated it because no one would want to be my friend they only wanted me to trauma dump or home work. Slowly I retracted back into my own shell and got more online. Once I mentioned something about going on imvu and celebrating my birthday w my online friends and my " friends " gave me a super judgy weird look. I know its bad but not that badddd. Now life is too busy to worry about friends and I have started to enjoy my company. Easier to find like minded people online.

Anonymous 120579

>>120577
it doesn't get easier. the only way to feel less lonely is basically by distracting yourself. having a schedule can help (work or school) because then you aren't alone with your thoughts as much and when you get home you just want to fall asleep. it can also be more isolating though because you might see people at work or school talking to each other. getting really into a media (TV show game etc.) can help too. last night i couldn't sleep so i spent a couple hours talking to myself in my head about house md. talking to yourself in your head or writing stuff down as if you were talking/texting/writing a letter to someone else helps.


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Anonymous 120524[Reply]

Why is my dad like this? I feel like he hates me. Both of my parents are super fat I used to be fat but I lost the weight. When I lost the weight my dad said he used to think I would live all my life as a bear and other snarky comments whereas my mother said nothing but was happy with what I did. I was also once upset with my licensce picture and he looked at it and laughed and when I ask him why he did that he didnt say a word… My mother has never laughed at my face. Oh btw when I was fat he never said anything about it. He also ignores me when I try to talk to him about my struggles with food. I was going away for college and he said to learn how to do make up. Is he gay in spirit? My sister also once caught him looking at a weird group chat where they send porny pictures. He also hates unmarried women for no reason. The weirdest thing he does is those remarks to me like I'm literally your daughter. My mother said that I kinda look like my late paternal grandma. Also the worst thing is my paternal grandpa once bit my cheek lightly while I was in bed with him I was 7 or 8 back then and he did nothing about it. I feel so betrayed it has never been more over
5 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120544

>>120530
My mom is a nutjob too but she is tolerable

Anonymous 120556

>>120544
Maybe its time to cut your losses completely and move on. Good luck nona.

Anonymous 120562

The only thing you can do is completely move on from these people but you never will so have fun

Anonymous 120568

>>120556
Yuppp ,,,stupid life

Anonymous 120569

>>120562
LiveLaughLove
Brighter days ahead
Never lose hope


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Is being an adult really this shitty? Anonymous 120474[Reply]

im 19, 20 in november and im really starting to wish i could be 17 forever. Things like making money are so hard, i have no amibtion for study anything or for a career because i spent my teens being emo with the whole "i wont survive long enough to do that" mindset. i genuinely cannot bring myself to care about anything other than stupid shit like being pretty but its so useless to my future. any advice on how to get my shit together?
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120485

i'm twenty. i'm in one of the worst headspaces i've ever been in. it's almost all due to the internet. bad life experiences, we can move past. we can adapt, we can move to other things. the internet is such a trap, and a drug, because it lets you forget everything else. that postpones the healing, the hurting, the moving on, and it robs you of perspective. the last year has been filled with paranoia and stress and anxiety over petty internet squabbles that don't matter, relationships that have no future or real life weight.

limit how much you use this place. watch TV, read books, that's all fine, but the petty chit chat and the insane people online can eat you alive. fill your time with things you're curious about. write a bad song. learn neat things on youtube. i liked the series "trope talks" by overlysarcasticproductions on youtube.

Anonymous 120533

>>120485
anon I feel like this was written by future me what the hell I'm 20 soon.this advice is so useful thank you. I spent the year exactly like that

Anonymous 120547

>>120533
don't make the same mistakes i made. the internet is not consequence free. between when i started fucking around here and the end, i've been hurt, betrayed, stalked, and forced into other people's conflicts. it's damaged my ability to trust or desire to be close to people, to make friends. i was better off before all of this. if you're part of any online communities, bail. spend time on yourself, allow your boredome to drive you to do things in real life. be safe, carry pepper spray, don't get drunk around strangers, but do stuff. meet people. don't be hypnotized by the digital world. it's not worth it. i hope you can break the pattern.

Anonymous 120548

>>120474 some bits of advice that helped me out (they contradict each other a little bit):
1: be kind to your future self. clean up your dishes, take a shower now, send that email, finish that thing, do it now so that your future self won't have to worry about it. save your quarters so she can get something from the vending machine too <3
2: live more in the present and don't let yourself get too engrossed in "i need X to happen and then Y and Z so that I don't have to A" because it can very easily eat you up. if you get a few minutes to yourself and it's a nice day outside, stand in the fresh air and enjoy it. be happy that your lunch has the right amount of sauce on it. watch a bird pick at something on the ground and laugh when it drops it. little things can make a huge difference, good and bad.
3: try stuff and mix it up! I'm in university right now and there's dinner events for my major. i'm skipping class this thursday so i can go and meet others in my field and go with some classmates. a little spontaneity keeps you sharp and i think a break in routine sometimes is good for you.
hope these helped a little bit :)

Anonymous 120565

>>120483
At least nona won't be dead


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bf has been taking photos of me Anonymous 120386[Reply]

i don't get it.. i went thru his phone, the secure folder. all pics inside are indecent photos of me, some of them are my nudes (that i sent to him) but most of them are taken while i was sleeping or unaware. and like, i'm not mad or anything. in fact it's kinda hot and it's way better than him watching porn or whatever. but i don't get why he hasn't said something about it. i guess he thinks i would be mad? maybe i should but it's genuinely not a problem for me. am i fucked up for thinking like this?
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120391

you
are a retard and you will regret letting a man violate you like this

Anonymous 120403

he has other secrets

Anonymous 120405

>>120386
The first poster is right and you're either incredibly naive or coping. If my bf did this I would assume he was getting 4channers to do tributes and I'd run for the hills.

Anonymous 120435

confront him about it. moids trade vulnerable pictures of women with eachother. he likely does trade them, or at least shows them off to other moids irl.

Anonymous 120555

>>120435
my dad texted me a bunch of erotic pictures of his girlfriends sleeping feet and legs once. the next day he frantically called me and said it was "an inside joke between him and his girlfriend" and that he sent them by accident. so fucking gross, i'll never forget that.
>>120386
you're retarded break up with it immediately


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Anonymous 120486[Reply]

i truly cannot stand my body any longer, every guy i talk to likes my personality but whenever they actually see me irl they run tf away from me and im just so tired of being fat and not knowing how to properly take care of myself… do u guys have any advice on that? i truly dont know what to do with myself anymore and its killing me lmao
11 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120520

don't change yourself and put yourself through turmoil for the sake of men

Anonymous 120521

Usually men are willing to date even fat women. You must weight over 200 pound.

Anonymous 120538

>>120521
Not everyone lives in USA.

Anonymous 120540

don't jump on very restrictive diets or habits because you'll eventually back out and feel worse than when you started. Instead, integrate healthy habits gradually so that it doesn't feel like something forced upon your life. Depending on your health situation, it's always worthwhile to check for potential endocrine imbalances which might be hindering your potential for weight loss as well as affecting your energy. Good luck

Anonymous 120550

Intermittent fasting is sustainable once you pass the early hump.


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Abusive OCD bf pt 2 Anonymous 95617[Reply]

>>>/feels/34633
Last thread hit limit and many nonas seem concerned for her safety.

If you see this, we hope you are ok! Please give us an update on the police situation.
116 posts and 7 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120412

>>120409
Not reading the entire thing but BREAKUP idgaf about his sacrifices …leave him! Also call the police. You can convince yourself all you want but a man hitting you will never be justified

Anonymous 120442

>>120409
I'm sorry noona, you didn't deserve it and even if you did, he had no right to try to make justice like that.

Anonymous 120517

>>120409
You'll stay with him until he punches you hard enough to cause an internal bleeding and pass away from it. You've been posting updates for years. Sooner or later your updates will stop coming because he will have killed you.

Anonymous 120531

>>120517
OP. Honestly what scares me the most is being abused in old age. Especially because I know I will develop memory problems like dementia. I did move my passport from the apartment to my workplace in case I get the courage to leave. He gets in my head and honestly makes me think everything is my fault. Today I did the laundromat routine wrong so I hve to get up 3 hours early to do it again before work tomorrow.

Anonymous 120545

>>120531
Unless and until he has magical powers idk why don't you leave? Love yourself a little. You can and will find love again but a life once gone will never come back


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