/feels/ - Advice & Venting

No, you have reasonable suspicion. Can’t trust moids these days especially the last part about the uwu emo girl part. You need to confront him. Don’t let him think he can slide away with anything. Also, guys probably like it when you’re a bit “jealous” because it shows you really do love and value them.

>>125997
He woke up and kept apologizing and said that the emo girl was someone he followed really long time ago before we even meet but i probably didn't see her he said he's sure that he didn't follow her recently and he has cut the conversation with her after we started talking. The other one turned out to be his really close friend's gf lol

>>125936
>Are you really "supposed" to
Well, yes, I guess women are expected to be heterosexual. I tried to force myself to be attracted to random boys at school just to fit in when I was asked about crushes, it was to the point that even I started to believe it. Until a boy asked me out and I had to face reality. I just didn't want to date at all and if I got to pick, I'd actually prefer my girl friends as girlfriends, but also not in a sexual way. It took me so long to figure out my actual preferences because I was preoccupied with what and how I'm "supposed" to be attracted to people.

>>125937
>I just didn't want to date at all and if I got to pick, I'd actually prefer my girl friends as girlfriends, but also not in a sexual way

Thats just means you are not ready for dating. I mean thats perfectly normal, not everybody needs to date and if you go out to date, either men or women, when all you want it seems to be to chill with your friends, you are actually forcing yourself to end up in uncomfortable situations.

>>125938
Yeah, I felt that way until I had an actual crush at 20.
Made me feel very out of place since all of my friends were dating or at the very least interested in it, like 10 years earlier than me. I'm almost 30 now and I noticed that I only really get crushes on people I've been friends with for like at least 3 years. More romantically than sexual though, so I'd say I'm demiromantic asexual since that's what that describes. I don't feel abnormal about it anymore, it's just how I am ig. I do wish I'd figured out that this kind of asexuality is normal earlier though, because I did force myself into some uncomfortable situations in my late teens… Especially after reading about how totally effective arranged marriages are, that feelings will just develop if you force yourself to be with someone of the opposite gender (because "men and women can't be friends, they'll date" or sth) or that women aren't truly interested in sex anyway but they have it because they care so much about their bfs and just trying out sex will make me like and crave it anyway and all that garbage. (One of my friends really did crave sex and I thought, "sex must be so good, I'll feel just like her after I do it, I just gotta bring myself to do it"). I'm glad I didn't take it too far in the end though, my partner never pressured me or anything although I did feel immense guilt when I didn't just fall in love and want sex after doing very uncomfortable kissing and stuff. (I even tried to work myself up to it by fantasising and thinking of him when masturbating, but it didn't really change anything). Wasn't great for either of us but I'm glad that it didn't go as far as it could've gone. I should've taken it easy back then and just focused on my friends instead of trying to force something I wasn't feeling, but whenever I told people I didn't have a crush nor type, they straight up didn't believe me and accused me of lying and stuff, kinda sucked…

>>125936
Thanks I'm just ranting really. I know I don't "have" to find men attractive I just want to shout into the void my irritation. I'm actually 4b. I'm not closed off to dating women I just don't want to hurt them. Did I mention I got out of all of my relationships? I genuinely start feeling claustrophobic in them. Up until now at least.

i can still feel attraction towards them though. So sometimes I genuinely wonder if someone wouldn't make me want to run for the hills… But I'm resigned to assume no, because it's happened so mNy times I just don't date.

But I refuse to experiment in ways that hurt lesbians just for my own gain no matter how cute I find them sometimes. I get claustrophobic but I don't rope people info it.

The thing with men though is complicated. I'm on the opposite side of the universe from men and what they want, there's too much to unpack.

>>125937
That was me too, ages ago. I thought I had to give it a shot and I broke them all off.

>>125956
This is such a non issue lol. If being pretty is so tiresome go back to being a fat slob.

>>125959
Yes, that's why I said "I can't complain"
I'm not unhappy, just thinking about how strange it is

>>125959
Yes, that's why I said "I can't complain"
I'm not unhappy, just thinking about how strange it is

>>125962
why do you keep double-posting nona?

>>125963
I don't know why it's happening, I think it's something with my computer

This image makes me so sad ik it's probably AI but it makes me so unreasonably sad

>>125947
why are you so angry
>>125948
he brought it upon himself sadly

>>125868
My parents 😭

>>125870
I'd say it's pretty normal to not want to get up in the morning if it means having to deal with some assholes who berate you all the time and don't even want to listen to you. Some people are just incapable of dealing with a human they have power over. And some of them are parents. Best of luck nona.

>>125860
I've been there. I promise, it can get better, even if it's a slow process…
But yeah, you're not "making excuses", you're struggling and those people could help you instead of pointlessly complaining about what you're actively suffering from.
But some people simply don't get it. It can be so frustrating, I've had breakdowns over this before with different people. It's a special kind of hell when people don't understand you and you try to express it in different ways and rather than just taking you by your word, they pretend like they can relate somehow and totally get it but by what they're saying, you can tell that they really don't…
I hope you have a therapist you can talk to at least… And that you're getting support, even from the people who don't fully understand. I'd hope they're trying to help at least, even if they're apparently quite bad at it.

>>125860
They don't understand because they never had something like that happen to them. Unfortunately depression is something very few people can actually understand or even sympathize with, people always think there are worse things in life etc etc Trying to explain to them is useless because they will always try to rationalize it when it's not something to rationalize.
Give yourself time, try read things online, self help and care can help a lot

Radahn, stop being a baby and brush your teeth, they smell like your sister´s rot

>>125851
>a nasty reputation for being misandric
…You know where you are, right?

>>125861
No.

>>125779
Monday's come and gone so how was it?

>>125779
Tell him you won't have sex before marriage.

Just deny him on the first few dates and see how he reacts. Get to know his interests and hobbies first, too.
Be careful those nerd types are usually insecure, but they can get really nasty when they don’t get what they want in a short period of time. Most men are like that, but a nerd can become obsessed since he doesn’t have anything else to move on to.

If you leave you will only have one baby to take care of. He sounds unstable and probably abusive, that sort of behavior tends to ramp up after the baby comes. You really need to see a doctor nona, I really hope he isn’t your entire support system cause if he is he’s failing

>>125902
>he doesn't want me to get an education or work, and I haven't had the chance to go outside or see doctors because he doesn't like it
Kill him.
>my boyfriend is a drug addict
If he blames his bad behaviour on any drugs he takes, he's still responsible for his bad behaviour, don't forget.
>he doesn't want me to get an education or work
Why? There could not be a flag redder than this. This is third world woman slavery level of controlling abuse.
>I can't see the doctor
You know, if you kill him, it's basically self-defence. Not just because of this particular red flag, but it's quite a glaring one, innit?
>he doesn't like it
Why? Because he doesn't like you seeing other people who could remind you that there's a whole world out there where you could be free and away from him? Are you literally his prisoner?
>I think I've only left the house about 7 times during the pregnancy. If I threaten to leave, he threatens
Yeah, he's definitely keeping you prisoner. Trying to brainwash you that this is normal and that if he can't keep you confined and submissive, he'll literally die, that's normal for a certain type of abuser. He's full of shit, he won't kill himself and if he does, is that so bad…?
>he threatens suicide
Unfortunately, he likely won't do it himself. My dad was like this too, always threatening to kill himself and that fucker never did, despite all the times he cut himself (shallow cuts) and took various drugs (also vodka, but also more illegal drugs and weed). When I was living with him and brainwashed by living with him for more than 15 years (you can't help having empathy for someone you live with for this long, especially if your safety depends on their mood, it's instinctual to feel like you need to care for them like a servant) I was so worried about him, like the so goodhearted teenager I was. But no, he did not kill himself, even decades later. If he had, I'd have gotten through that though. You and your babys safety are 1000x more important than your abusers fragile psyche and also his psyche is neither your fault nor even your responsibility! You are NOT responsible for this grown aPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>125902
>>125908
Sorry, that post was way too long…
Please work on getting away, it's not safe to stay with someone like that… What country are you from? Is there anyone you can reach out to? Anyone trustworthy? Anyone at all?

>>125902
If you live in the US then call nearby women’s shelters, community resources, planned parenthood, anything. You’re being abused and falsely imprisoned and they can give you resources and guidance to get out.

>>125902
was this baby planned/wanted? are you in your country legally/have citizenship?
Either way-your boyfriend is setting you up for abuse via babytrapping. you need to leave. it does not matter if he offs himself and it is not your fault because it’s his planned choice. threatening suicide is literally an abuse tactic. not letting you see a doctor is abusive because that’s extremely dangerous to your health. Take the cat outside, cats have survival instincts and can fend for themselves. You and your baby are more important.
Collect all of your evidence to be used in court against him potentially make sure you have things to identify yourself.
Does your family or friends know about this? Try and see if you can stay with them.
Block him everywhere and if he comes back with his bullshit you have to take him to court.
It’s not love to block your wife and future child from medical care. He cannot support you and values drugs more than you. This man is garbage

No.

Honestly sounds like it might be a point of view problem. Maybe you are underestimating how much effort the other parties are putting into the relationship. I did the same thing when I was younger.

>>125548
Warren the Eagle?

Nope.

Theyll always gonna talk about themselves or their favorite football team no matter how much you dont give a shit about it. At least youll know what they are easier so thats a positive thing.