/feels/ - Advice & Venting

So I've grown up a bit of my anti-social phase. I still love books and solitude and hate maintaining relationships but I want to go to parties/club and dance and feel alive every now and then. Not really for the casual sex part, just remembering I'm young.
I'm 22, not terrible ugly, and live near a big city. How do I start? I don't have any friends to go out with, don't know any clubs/parties and quite afraid of meeting people who know me there.

Not all of them, but a lot of them get really clingy/obsessive and creepy EVEN AFTER you use clear communication and tell them you're not interested/to knock some behaviors off, and some of their responses to "no" are to escalate their behavior, threaten you, or act in threatening ways that suggest they may have… plans to do something nefarious to you.

It makes me feel bad because a lot of autistic guys are nice. But I've had way too many creepy guys latch on to me, because I'm a girl who still will have conversations about gaming/anime with anybody who can relate, and I literally just know how to do makeup/am not super fat.

It doesn't help either that a lot of wackos are self diagnosing as autism these days when they get caught breaking the social contract and doing something extremely reprehensible or disgusting.

And now if you call out one of these people who you know has 0 symptoms of autism, except disregarding what is and isn't appropriate, because it DOES have other symptoms y'know… BOY are you in for a treat, enjoy getting mobbed.

It seems like it's becoming the ultimate excuse for sexual harassment/rapey comments/behavior, and if you reject their sentiment, you're le evil abelist wammen who is doing a disservice to humanity by not giving yourself to every mentally incompetent or evil man that wants you and isn't afraid to sexually harass you.

Throughout Jan, I had a friend group of women who were around my age who sorta shared the same views as me. (not really the more i realize)

Everything was going so great and I enjoyed everyone's presence. However after a while, they came to terms about my mental issues after I opened up about them, hoping for some sort of support. They immediately began to mock me, making fun of my entire situation and began perceiving me being mentally ill as something obscene and grotesque.

I ended up cutting them off completely as they were prone to making fun of the women they'd cut off and I didn't want to be humiliated for a place i felt safe in.

I am glad that I left because I realized everyone there was racist or literal comgirls looking off of male validation.

But they gaslight me constantly, as if I was in the wrong, not taking accountability. Had a few people cut me off because of them.

I still feel like shit because of it and I feel worthless.

There’s this guy at my university who I instantly was attracted to when I met him, I approached him, we exchanged numbers and texted a few times. I wanted to be in a relationship with him because I rarely find guys who I feel intense physical attraction for He told me he wasn’t looking for a relationship right now, but I figured I could just wait it out. I sent him a really long text explaining how physically attracted I was to him, not saying I wanted a relationship but that I’d be willing to wait, he didn’t respond so I deleted his number and didn’t text him again. I knew he went to the gym so I kept on showing up at the gym just to see him. I would just make eye contact on my way in, then run on the treadmill a bit, not approaching. Today I decided to go up to him and say something, and he told me to stop bothering him. I said ok and left the gym immediately. I guess I won’t be going to the gym again. It’s frustrating how none of the guys I like ever like me back. I was actually holding back how obsessive I could be. I guess my gushy text expressing how I liked his physical appearance was a bit overboard. I wish I was a normal person and not a socially reclusive broken retard. I want to kill myself so bad

Previous thread >>117577

This isn't my picture, but it's the way I live.

What are some green flags you like to see in men?

Does it bother you if you're partner is open about their previous relationships, previous ONS, ex-girlfriends, ex-wives, and such and always brings them up?

i'm a very anxious/nervous type person. i've been with my bf for about 2 years now and we only talk through messages on discord for the most part cause we live very far away from each other and I get way too scared to call. growing up, I pretty much avoided boys and so i really cant talk to him. we've tried a few times but I just cant. it makes me insanely scared and nervous. he sends me voice messages sometimes though and he sounds really really really cute and I tell him this all the time, how cute he is. problem is the other day I sent him a video of me talking about some random stuff and he was just called me cute a bit. I know this sounds stupid but i guess I was expecting him to be like "awww you sound so so so cute" and stuff but he seems like only mildly interested? I don't know. I don't think he said anything wrong but its just that I feel like I'm so in love with him and enamoured by him and I don't know if he feels the same and its making me depressed.

Hi everyone,
I'm not sure if this post is allowed on here, but it's worth a shot. I'm 19 this year, and up until I was 14 I was convinced I was heterosexual. But every time a guy hit on me or asked me out, I'd get this deep feeling of dread and disgust. Once I even cried because I felt 'dirty'. When I was 16, I saw this boy, I really really liked him. I'd talk about him all the time, wish he'd ask me out, got upset when he turned me down, etc. Eventually, I went on a date with him when I was 17, and I came home genuinely wondering if I was a lesbian. I had an on and off thing with him throughout last year, but every time my friends would jokingly refer to him as my boyfriend, I'd feel disgusted that they could even percieve me that way. I'd have so many talking stages with guys, but after a day or two, that 'honeymoon phase' would wear off and I would genuinely hate them. Every time my friends would talk about boys, I'd feel this almost imposter syndrome when I'd talk and try to relate to them. When I'd see guys IRL, I'd study their faces, imagine scenarios, before finally deciding to like them. I liked getting attention and validation from men, but I'd never want it to get serious. My 'feelings' for men i've 'wanted' recently always wittles down unless I see them IRL, then I want them to want me again. Sounds pretty lesbian, right?

Here's my dilemma. I've had two 'talking stages' with girls before, and I lowkey got that same 'ick' feeling. I'd honestly get uncomfortable every time my friends / family members / literally anyone would just percieve me as capable of having romantic feelings period. (I.E., insinutating i'm busy on valentines, asking about relationship prospects, etc.) I find the idea of being with a man appealing, occasionally find myself wanting a boyfriend even, I find male fictional characters attractive, and I've had crushes on IRL men before but they were always unattainable in some way (i.e. tiktok boys or passers by on the street.) I remember having crushes on boys as a kid, before I could conceptualise male validation. I don't feel aversed to being with a man, and I find sex with AMAB individuals appealing. I've had phases where I even questioned my attraction to women and thought I was straight and faking it.

However, I can't differentiate between these feelings towards men being comphet / wanting validation / loving the chase, or if I'm just bisexual and currently going through the 'bi cycle'. My standards for Post too long. Click here to view the full text.