/feels/ - Advice & Venting

i need to finish my radio kit but ive been too stubbornly depressed to do anything. what have you guys been putting off?

i got physically abused when i was in middle school and i had noticed i was like ‘weird’ after. had a freakout the other day bc some dog scared me and it like finally clicked so i went to the doctor. i feel a lot better knowing that im not just a shitty person but like what the fuck now??? i just feel like im quantifiably damaged. anybody have like any advice on what route i should take? like support groups or medication? thanks :p

I’m looking for fellow victims of a man named Randall Mosey of Ohio. He should be 32 by now. Blue eyes, white guy, computer nerd who loved starcraft. He molested me when I was 13 and I know there are others, because I tried to reach out to his girlfriend through her tellonym and she got really upset and deleted my messages after responding to one saying she’s “tired” of people trying to ruin his reputation. So that is not the first time someone’s tried to tell her that her boyfriend’s a pedophile. She accused me of lying because I hid behind anonymity. Excuse me that I’m not exactly jumping at the idea of hopping on a skype call with you guys.

I wanna know if y’all have any advice on finding other victims too. I just keep remembering.

a "friend" of mine made a joke at my expense about how im insecure and not confident in a kind of condescending and insulting way. i called her out on it immediately afterwards (as shes made many disrespectful remarks in the time weve known eachother) but it made me feel kind of bad… i hate that i get perceived as this unconfident person.
how would you girls have handled it?

i like girls but only certain type. the hikki femcel type of, but most of them are either straight or not interested in daiting. i dont think i will ever find gf to be with because of it. all the girlies i have liked never liked girls. all im asking for is cute pale hikikomori-ish girl who is similar to me…

i don't know what's happening to me lately, i have been feeling way more lonely than usual, normally, i'm a lonely person, i like to be in my room doing my own thing, i normally sit alone in lunch at uni, i have a very few friends, its normal to be alone for me, but lately i have been feeling a void growing in the pit of my stomach, its eating me from the inside out and i can't do anything about it, or i feel like so, have yall ever heard the song 'race' by alex g? that's how the pit of my heart sounds. Im having 2 weeks of vacation, so i'm in my house all day, i'm not doing much, just assignments from uni, playing LoL, BS1, sims4, eating, bathing, sometimes i call my online friends on discord and we play together, but most of the day, im just… there…
I'm sitting in my bed… doom scrolling… waking up late…
I do talk to people of my family, i live with my grandparents and my big sis, my sister works all day and my grandparents work too in their small business, so the house is always alone. I'm the only one here all day, and i don't have much to do, i just clean, eat, play.
I feel like my life is in pause, like i'm missing something, like i need to be somewhere important and i'm really late. Video Games don't fill the void anymore, every time im playing it feels so repetitive, i don't get distracted of my thoughts by playing, i can't write down how i feel because i don't actually feel anything anymore, im just so tired, but i can't sleep, i don't even sleep anymore, im just existing in slow mo, every time i try to relapse on SH i just can't, i have grown a coward, i just feel so sad and anxious because i feel like this is going to be how i'm going to live for the rest of my life and i can't do anything, i don't feel normal, i see other girls in my class, same age as me (17) looking so healthy, so pretty, so smart (cuz i'm also failing all of my classes), i just look at them and i get so upset, they look so mature and beautiful, they already look like young women, im stuck looking like a pre teenager due to my ED, i want to be like them, surrounded by a lot of friends, pretty, mature, smart, funny, i bet they never feel alone.
i want to stop feeling alone, i want to be normal like everyone else, i just feel like im fragile, but not like glass, like a bomb that could explode any second.
you don't need to give me advice if you don't have any, i just wanted to feel heard, and here i alwaPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Would anyone miss you if you died tomorrow?

Wouldn't that solve a lot of problems? Looking for partners in the modern world is so undignified.

how do you girls deal with murderous&homicidal thoughts? im not actually going to act on it, but whenever i get angry i immediately fantasize about murder. and its been real bad lately after coming across a lot of moids on 4chan. i know that if someone actually attempted to physically hurt me or rape me id most likely go through with it but i find myself having these thoughts simply because i dislike other people. and its not purely intrusive thoughts either… idk sorry mods if this isnt allowed

i've been friends with this girl ever since my first year of college. we got along and she made me realize that life isn't always about your final sat score or your gpa. that maybe its about the little things that happen.
when i started to get comfortable with her, i realized i changed a bit. like, not in a good way- but in a bad way. it was frightening because i was saying yes to things she asked me to do with her that 17 year old me would've never agreed to back then.
she used to bully this one girl that we'd see usually and thought it was funny if we got her socials and kept sending her grabify links to log into her instagram, snap, tiktok, etc. i agreed.
i hesitated when she sent me the link so i could go send it to her but she insisted. and so i did. we then got access to her instagram. then her snap, then her tiktok. i knew it was wrong but i still did it.


i told an old friend from high-school about it and she told me that we were both wrong, but she should've never dragged me in if i she was insisting.
was this bad influence? or am i severely at fault here?