/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Why are Moids incapable of even basic emotional cognition? Is it biological or societal?

context: I'm in a committed relationship with a guy I've known for about two years. We get along okay, no real red flags or anything, he cares a lot about me admires me, and I like him for how genuine he is. Even with his other friend groups and stuff, he doesn't have wild personality swings or anything, like he's trying to be a people pleaser, and I don't get the sense that he's like that with me, either, he's consistent in how he talks and what he talks with me about

However, that's not what I got in a relationship with him for. A few times when I've known him, he's been really desirous, like, shit you only read about in an NTR doujinshi with how possessive he's been and the depth of the kinks(that he knows we share). He also writes, and some of the (can you call it fanfiction if it's about the two of you? lol)stories he shows me are incredible. He treats me like his best friend and inspiration, but this side of him blows that all away, I'm a total fucking simp for this side of him(pic)

My question is, is it bad of me to like, goad him into showing that side more often? I feel like I could sign away the rest of my fucking life to this guy when he drops his human skin and just acts like this cunning ravishing animal
I sometimes do stuff like referring to him in third person, as if there's another person that takes over when he's like that, but I feel like this could backfire and give him impostor syndrome or something. We've both taken up the habit of writing lists for things we want to do with each other(kink stuff, date stuff) but his is really short, and he knows this, and he says "I wonder if my standards for what to put down are too high"

Is there a better way to tell him to be more forward with his desires with me? I guess this isn't an uncommon thing to feel like men are too guarded, but I'd really appreciate any advice

Men are far more satisfied with self-focused and solitary lives. Being unable to socialize hits a woman much harder because we're more socially driven. Yet men get a loneliness epidemic and we don't. Why? Do we not vocalize how we feel enough? What's the board's thoughts?

I wanna see if I relate to other humans

Genuine question

Im lonely, the only person I have is my mentally unstable long distance boyfriend who i do not love but who blackmails me to be with him. I am 18 and I graduate highschool in 2 months and have no clue what I am going to do
I feel like Im constantly grieving for who I was 3 years ago because even though I was bitterly lonely then, at least I had online friends to help me cope and wasnt trapped in a miserable relationship with a manchild. And at least then, I had some hope. I didnt need to have everything figured out, to have a job and a license. I had so much time
I know people will tell me its not over yet at 18 but it really feels over

God, I hate wording it that way, but I don't know how else to express it. I've felt the same way since around 12 to today at 21.

I think masculine women are really cool, but thinking of myself that way feels wrong. Outside of any social desires to not be a man or a woman, I also feel like my internal "body map" is screwed up or something. Accidentally brushing againts my boobs freaks me out every time, like it's not meant to be there. My hips are like that to a lesser degree, and I don't look at my genitals much but when I do I get that same uncanny weirded out feeling. Like a reverse phantom limb. Seeing my chest under a shirt makes me uncomfortable too, and although I've got a "good" body, it's part of why I don't wear tight shirts and I usually compress my chest in public (not harshly, not uncomfortable enough to sacrifice health). I don't love how feminine parts of my face look, but that's more personal preference rather than the gut instinct weird feeling I get from my sex characteristics.

I love my life and my friends and family. I don't have autism. I've never experienced any trauma. I've never hated my body. I'm staunchly feminist and I feel like I have less internalized misogyny than a lot of women. I don't know what else could cause this.

Being "non-binary" doesn't make sense to me either, because although I don't think there's such a thing as a male/female brain, the social reality is that there is no third gender catagory. They are just viewed as men/women trying to be something else. I've got lots of friends of both genders, but I still feel "othered" from groups of just women or just men.

It's so stupid, and I try not to think about it, but it's like it's always nagging in the back of my mind. I feel like I'm not my "true self" but there's also no way to be my "true self." I feel stuck in limbo, like I'm just waiting to "transform" and start living authentically. What do I do? How do I get over these feelings? I'm so sick of feeling stuck.

nonas, how much time had passed before you got your diagnosis?

because my psychiatrist is great and all, but he doesn't have a clue wtf is wrong with me

i too have no clue what is wrong with me, it literally could be anything. is it NPD? is it BPD w/ narcissistic tendencies? is it just BPD? is it adhd or 'tism? i have NO FUCKING CLUE. i don't get how people can diagnose themselves, i don't understand myself at all

the only thing i know is that i have OCD because it's pretty clear. maybe depression too, 'cause i was treated for it for like 6 years or something

Anyone just have lots of rage and general contempt for everyone around them? Ignore the random image

Do any of you have an older or younger sibling that grew up more popular than you? Maybe they were deemed the golden child and had been given more attention by your parents or maybe they just had better luck in school. They seem to have more friends, got a relationship before you, have better looks etc. How does it feel to be the overshadowed sibling and how do you find ways to cope?