/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>124774

That could be. But also it’s difficult not to play the comparison game from time to time.

It seems like everyone around me further ahead. Hell, my eighteen year old foreign coworker managed to move out on her own just a month ago. Meanwhile, I’m still being told I can’t use the laundry machine whenever I want and have to ask to leave the home if I want to go outside for whatever reason.

>>124801
>>124802
Sounds like you're imprisoned.

>>124775

I’ve quickly come to learn that. It seems painful to live anywhere BUT your parent’s home but it comes with an overdose of infantilization.

>>124783

Yes! I’m currently working on that. I know Bumble offers a roommate option so maybe that’s a good start.

>>124802
Do they ever prohibit you from leaving or they just ask to know where you're going?

>>124809
'he'

why do you all have empathy with criminals????? did you really argued with your bf just to defend criminals? Girl

>>124558
Luxury belief. When you are not the one affected by crime, it's easy to defend criminals to feel good about yourself.

>>124558
yup, that's also the point I made. >>124237

There are a lot of very stupid replies to this OP.

OP's boyfriend and her are having a fairly meaningless, in terms of their relationship, disagreement. Bf is pretty unlikely to be murdered, so personalising a legal/ethical rift like this is supremely childish.

If you can't have disagreements like this with a partner, you ought not to be in a relationship in the first place. It's not much different to getting hysterically upset because someone doesn't like your favourite band or film.

>>124599
>OP's boyfriend and her are having a fairly meaningless, in terms of their relationship, disagreement.
OP started it

>Bf is pretty unlikely to be murdered, so personalising a legal/ethical rift like this is supremely childish.
You are a retard who must live in a peaceful area. Surprise not everyone lives on Disneyland.

If you don't immediately hate criminals and say they must live a normal life after commiting a crime then you're a sociopath who have no empathy with victims and you aren't afraid to lose your beloved ones at all. Our "female empathy" whatever shouldn't be directed to criminals but the people we love. You don't have a idea the hell that's living in a place commanded by organized crime, you retards must be crazy if you really think some criminals can live in society.

Use your privilege to help those who aren't. Charity, activism, volunteering, educating, giving back to the community, etc.

Running away into the woods like that Sean Penn movie simply absolves you of the guilt that comes from being privileged and is an out-of-sight, out-of-mind approach to this problem.

Of course, I'm talking about making the world a better place for cats.

>>124605
>Of course, I'm talking about making the world a better place for cats.

This is all that matters.

This and not being a billionaire vampire psychopath.

Don't live in guilt because you come from an some well off family it's stupid. People in general are equally shitty it doesn't matter what class they come from pffftlol just enjoy life because we'll all be dead some day

>>124604
>removing myself from society?

I applaud you if you actually do. Just take all the right equipment, don't forget the snake venom extractor and mosquito net

priveledge is a made up concept designed to profit off of you hating yourself. do whatever you want.

>>124788
When the only response can be anger and name-calling then the truth has been found. You have proved that privilege doesn't exist.

Get kicked out

>>124646
true

Sauce on the brainrot animal?

>>106385
I don't know if I buy this, I think it depends on how you teach radfem to your son. Guys literally throw a shitfit if you tell them that rape is bad after all, so ingraining it into them from a young age seems like the only viable solution.

>>120740
Left: countries that make divorce illegal through real or soft laws
Right: countries that acknowledge that women deserve at least one or two rights, maybe more

Anyway you can't honestly be in defense of a slave institution like marriage, what fucks kids up isn't step parents it's bad parents. Always has been.

You do not want a family. It will make shit worse.

>>124603
Hava nagila

>>124603
I hate being alone. I want to fall in love, I want to be part of something.
A family seem right.

>>124569
i feel like im losing my mind, she gave me her phone password but that was after he deleted the messages

>>124569
Well I wouldn't want to start off with them defensive, so maybe cede an apology over your mean entries, then mention start your inquiry

>>124333
Are you both in positions where you can visit each other multiple times a year? If it works out is one of you willing to uproot your life to move to be with them?
You're both in the same country so that skips out any visa issues at least.

I'm dead serious: try a match making service before you resort to edating. If you decide to go through with edating, you need to meet up ASAP, be able and willing to meet up frequently after that and bridge the gap within 2 years MAX.

>>124333
If you dislike dating then don't do that. E-dating is far harder than IRL dating and works best if you and the other person have an open relationship or have avoidant attachment styles. Avoidants tend to do extremely well with long distance. Also, you should work out why you have a problem with dating, never get in a relationship if you have these conflicting feelings. Be ethical and consider the other person, that is the main part of having a relationship. If you are too in your head, you will not be a present partner and the relationship will die. Also, a lot of people will say well if you lay everything out and the other person agrees to a relationship anyway that it is fine but in many cases persons don't grasp the implications.

>>124372
Do not do open relationship OP. It's only for degens

>>124333

thanks for all of the replies nonas. we are planning to meet in a few months.

we are both pretty antisocial so i think there is a chance this could be a good arrangement.. also i trust him fully and we have both been alone for a long time so i don't think cheating is a concern

i guess now i just worry how about meeting in person will go

>>124527
yeah if I lived among muslim tier rapists I would probably prefer an asexual moid too

>>124487
I don't think he truly was attracted to me, at least not physically. He would only call me hot when I did something or said something that wasn't sexual or arousing at all. He just really liked me for what I thought, did and said; Never for how I looked. Your ex sounds awful too. Was he into weird things? My ex grew up isolated and never had a gf before, so there might be a correlation.
>>124523
>>124525
He was perfect in every way, and he wasn't asexual or low libido. He would get turned on from me doing or saying the most mundane things. I never even had to dress up for him. His arousal for me felt completely out of love and not lust, it felt weird because I never dated a demisexual before. He would plan out romantic trips, seduced me and made sure I never felt insecure, but he didn't lust for me. When I broke up with him he understood it too, he told me it happens all the time.

>>124551
Sounds like hell. You deserved better.

No, it is not wrong of you but it is a tad unrealistic of a goal to find both spontaneous attraction of high strength and attraction to you as a person together in a long term or life partner. Typically that is a recipe for inability to back off.
Send the demisexual men over to me.

>>124559
>Send the demisexual men over to me.
What's your contact? I'll tell him to reach out.

>>124388
You are demented.

>>124492
Nona I honestly think that is a shitpost

>>124490
I do not understand what you mean by warrior programming Nona. Please elaborate.

>>124501
>warrior programming

it's a reference to the way modern cultures have evolved. when you go to school, when you participate in monetary exchange, when you work and for the most part when you engage in any kind of social interaction; basically when you do almost anything normal in modern life: everything is set up for you to become a certain way as much as currently possible while the things that are not a certain way yet are currently being scrutinized in an effort to make them become a certain way as well. the culture is carefully set up like that.

most people are so entangled in these basic setups, that they don't really think about it too much and in a way i even have empathy for that. when you are trapped in an awful job that consumes your life you are likely to conclude that you are too busy to question basics. but people who don't question basics all kind of turn out the same, an eery unsettling similarities in key areas of their personality. they all seem to have similar problems that might manifest in ways that seem different, complex and unrelated but i don't agree they are.

when you live consciously for long enough, you see how the things that are, turn into the things that have been with such reliable predictability. few things will surprise you if any. at some point you get it, you will see something and you can tell how it turn out; maybe not every time but most of the time.

warrior programming is the attempt to summarize this experience of what i might almost call a cultural inevitability. a more dramatic way to summarize it would be
>curse of being normal.

toxic normality might also describe it well but it sounds too contemporary for my taste, i try to make it sound more timeless when i communicate.

>>124486
>w. Changing just feels impossible. I'm at that point in my life where I know that even if I magically changed tomorrow and became this amazing, beautiful person that I want to be. Finding a good moid, falling in love, having a child and being happy feels impossible.

Stop centering your life around moids. You should seek healing for YOU only, not for some hypothetical moid who may or may not exist.
If you really want to atone, the best thing you can do is let him be. Do you think obsessing over him like this is letting him be happy and free? No, you're still clinging onto him and he will never be free until you realize that you can live without him
Your entire posts is just "Harley, Harley, Harley" enough!
Go make female friends, volunteer at a shelter or something, spend time with children and animals, continue with the meditation like the other recommended and stop being a slave. You are your own jailer, literally picrel
If he could move on then so can you JFC, you were a bitch, sure but it's not like you raped or beat him. Stop making yourself into this martyr figure, you're only mythologizing your own self pity instead of taking action. You said you never told this to anyone, couldn't even admit any of this to a therapist, well this is the first step towards moving on.