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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Do not respond to maleposters. See Rule 7.
Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

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Qt Partner Thread Anonymous 37674[Reply]

Greentext traits and how lovely your partner is
484 posts and 83 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 115060

>>115053
That was nice, thanks nona.

Anonymous 115105

awkward-look.gif

>becomes socially unacceptable to post about bf who is hot and tall
>one post then thread dies
… Where's the rest?

Anonymous 115106

>>114927
he looks like a pixar cartoon

Anonymous 116690

>retarded
>ginger
>wears glasses sometimes
>normal height
>cries on his own time if i'm upset
>brown eyes
>can eat 3 big macs

Anonymous 116707

>ambitious but not judgy in the least
>affectionate, caring, doting
>loves PDA, always wants to touch, when we're eating he's holding his leg against mine under the table, never pushy about it though
>beautiful angelic model face, long straight hair, dresses well but doesn't try too hard, always well-groomed
>an inch shorter than me but doesn't mind that i'm taller, loves when i wear heels because he benefits from me looking sexy
>calm, patient, confident
>well-educated, has come very far in life
>plans out his life with me in mind
>shows me off to family and friends, open about wanting me to be his life partner
>has cats, takes their care very seriously, teaches them tricks
>extremely clean, tidies up after me without mentioning it
>polite and mature but a bit more loose with his friends
>mostly friends with couples, has no single female friends
>compliments my personality and looks in ways that make me feel really seen and appreciated
>calls me cute pet names
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



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Anonymous 116626[Reply]

Legit starting to feel gay because of how pathetic men are
Anyone else feel this way? I actually can’t feel attracted to men anymore and feel much more satisfaction out of conversations with other women.
Men to me are like these low effort troglodytes that shy away from any in depth connection

Anonymous 116702

very understandable and based. you should look into 6B4T movement and maybe go out and try kissing some girls



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How do I not let what moids say affect me emotionally? Anonymous 111137[Reply]

I have stopped browsing various sites like 4chan because of the shit they say about women, especially Western women, it affected me emotionally.
23 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 116334

>>115917
which is based

Anonymous 116335

>>115955
oh they do. But it's mostly misinformation. if they start the conversation with stats we have the ammunition to shut them up if that's the only input they take. Also don't forget to call them fags or anything to do with getting cucked, it makes them seethe.
Ideally you wouldn't get involved but that just makes it more bleak for people that don't know. We should have some opposing force to retardation.

Anonymous 116577

>>111137
You need to understand that sites 4chan show the worse in the male population. While are majority of men are all sexists pos most of their misogyny is not as extreme as you see on sites like 4chan. Take a break from the internet.

Anonymous 116598

>>111137
i browsed r9k for a year straight after being bullied by a couple normies i think i have to kill myself now but i dont want to die

Anonymous 116695

When they get angry and say those things, it's projection. If they were happy and winning, they wouldn't be saying those things online.



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Unsent Letter Thread Anonymous 115657[Reply]

Previous Thread >>2119
23 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 116449

The wheat and grain are yet to reap
Clouds billow like white sheets
in the blue sky, the sun still stands,
hounds course through reeds and sand.

Rivers sparkle as they pleat
through narrow streams which
lap at feet, laughter echoes
through the trees:
Whose days are these?

Anonymous 116529

i just hope that soon, all your friends will see you for who you are.

Anonymous 116532

IMG_5058.jpeg

Joke’s on you bitch, my friends are all just like me.

Anonymous 116537

>>116449
Not moids, we're going to waste all of them. Their days are numbered.

Anonymous 116655

Dear M

After all this time I still love you. What you've done to me is unforgivable and just outright wrong. Day for day my subconscious makes me think of you no matter what I am doing. I still have the things you sent me, letters and screenshots of our conversations about love, even your voice is something I still remember.

Sincerely, P



#stamps #rainbow #…

Anonymous 116622[Reply]

i hate being fat but at the same time i dont? my body is huge and it makes it hard to fit in and sometimes i feel like being fat makes me stand out a lot (which it probably does) and i really want to lose the weight. but, when trying to lose weight all of the resources are either like, annoying "hot girl walk" bs, or just borderline racist ed-having lana del rey girls.

like i said, i don't hate myself, so the shaming doesn't really work to motivate me. it's also not really stopping me from getting into a relationship or anything cause i have a guy online that i'm into and he likes me back. i've had sexual experiences but they've all been online (cause im too scared to ever approach a guy irl) and some of which were literally just getting groomed.

during marching band, there's girls who are in my section who make fun of each other for "being fat" (they aren't) but i never liked them in the first place so i dont really care.

i'm trying to lose weight now, but i'm not really sure that the end goal is totally worth it. i'd kill to be skinnier though, i'd love to be able to say that i'm a size 4 or whatever, but i feel like it'll never happen. idk,,, i guess im just wondering if anyone else feels the same.

Anonymous 116670

How fat are you exactly? You would certainly feel better if you were slimmer but it is a difficult journey that requires your active participation. It won't just happen for you, you will fail if you're not committed.



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Long Distance Relationships Anonymous 44204[Reply]

Thread to discuss Long Distance Relationships. The struggles, the pros… meeting the person for the first time… meeting them for the 50th time… vent both sad and happy things. LDRs can be quite a challenge but it's the right thing for some people.
394 posts and 56 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 116560

IM FREEEEEE!!!! WORST FUCKING EXPERIENCD OF MY ENTIRE LIFE

Anonymous 116562

Ho fuck, I'm moving thousands of kilometres away to be with him in a week. I'm so excited, but I also can't tell anyone because I'll look absolutely insane, given we've only been together…2…months……

Anonymous 116570

I wish my ldr was better at communicating or at least honest is whether or not they’re still interested in me. Feels as if they don’t care about me like they used to anymore. I’m trying to be understanding though I know they’re going through a lot in their life.

Anonymous 116575

>>96223
could you show us his post? I wanna know what to look for.

Anonymous 116592

>meet a cute guy online
>start LDR
>meet after 6 months
>barely leave the house for the few weeks I can stay and fall in love
>feel incredibly lonely back home and want him to be with me
>he can't leave his sick mother or get a visa easily and I can't stay there
>break up because I'm immature, value my own feelings more and feel betrayed
>stay in contact, but I hurt him too much by trying to make him jealous
>years go by and we start talking more often
>neither of us can find a longterm relationship
>start talking throughout our days and spending all our time together on weekends
>I get asked out, but feel like it'd be wrong
>he feels the same way and admits he refused to go on an innocent coffee date because of me
>meet briefly while he's flying through my city
>instantly kisses and holds me, but pulls back
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



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Anonymous 116361[Reply]

For those with mental illness of any kind, how do you cope with the thought that it is forever? Will there ever be significant relief? I've had chronic, severe depression since I was a teenager, adhd struggles, used to be agoraphobic, still occasionally deal with self harm etc. Things are a lot better now, I'm in therapy, medicated, all that. but I can't stand the thought that I will more than likely have more bad days than good ones, or even "okay" days. Sometimes I'm told that i need to be realistic about it, that people aren't happy 24/7 but I don't think I'm being unreasonable when I say that most people aren't having bad days more often than okay ones. I'm not expecting intense joy at every waking moment, I just want to be content for more than a day. I don't want to be thinking about killing myself or scarring myself up more than I already have all of the time.

Anonymous 116384

I'm schizophrenic, I console myself with thinking about how it's not really forever because when I die the afterlife will be a new experience

Anonymous 116509

>>116361
im with you , i dont think about killing myself like i used to but after 10 years of therapy i still feel far from being self-actualized. life is dominated by my low mood states or hypomania. i have siblings who i can compare myself to who are not mentally ill and its reassuring in the sense that seeing them makes me know this is not normal and there can be better

Anonymous 116517

>>116361
i've given up on the expectation that i will ever experience completely normal emotions or cognition (schizotypal) and instead focus on smaller improvements. i've actually managed to improve my negative symptoms through this but, not positive or cognitive ones. the cognitive impairment is getting worse the longer i stay on lc. idk how old are you nona? when i was 19-21 i was convinced on suicide too but things changed once i stopped listening to therapists and taking their shitty meds. i've made more positive change in my life in this year alone than ever before, if i can do it you likely can as well. i'm really only worried about financially supporting myself because im too retarded for full time work but not enough for neetbux.

Anonymous 116582

>>116517
Sadly I'm 27. I feel like such a failure to thrive. I know no one has it easy in their 20s but all of my peers from high school went to college, got married, started their careers or businesses, have their own place, etc. Everything overwhelms me so much, sometimes I feel like I need a handler if I ever hope to be more independent than I am now



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Anonymous 116436[Reply]

>If you’re ‘bad at conversation’ just ask questions
>Autistic women have bad social and communication skills

How do you become good at connecting with others and making friends without treating it like a job interview? What do you do when you don't know what to talk about? If you talk about yourself, it makes you look like a narcissist. If you ask questions, it makes you look like a job interviewer.

Anonymous 116437

I wish I knew what to say in silence, my mind just goes blank so much
I have accepted I am not fit for social settings
I used to just drink a bit to loosen up but now when I drink I just get really sad so that's out the window

Anonymous 116470

>>116436
Just comment on random things in your surroundings if you reel like you're asking too many questions. Even if it sounds kind of retarded just give your opinion on low stake things. Normies want to talk even if they don't have anything to say.
>wow it's really hot today
>there sure are a lot of tourists here
>oh that drink looks really good

Anonymous 116475

>If you ask questions, it makes you look like a job interviewer.
Not if you show genuine interest and find some common ground. You can't JUST ask questions, you've got to engage with their responses.

There's videos on this with practical tips btw. I don't have them on hand rn but I'm sure you can find them if you search for it.

Anonymous 116559

i struggle with this too and i'm socially retarded, but recently i was able to make a new friend. i sat down next to her said hi and told her "i love your hair" which she then complemented me back and we just started talking from there. Of course it depends on how receptive the other person is but if they aren't? Move on and try again. imo there's nothing to lose because you don't know them that well in the first place.



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I am Pathetic Anonymous 108437[Reply]

I am so pathetic it is disgusting to me sometimes. I dont know if I have always been this way, I think I have, but i have such low self esteem, dignity, and worth that I let myself be treated like garbage by everyone I choose to spend my time with. Not only do I stay with someone who refuses to be monogamous, I am realizing that I also voluntarily choose to spend my time with people who I dont even think like me, they just tolerate me, if that. I remember growing up I was so desperate to be liked, i would let people beat me up for fun and sometimes I would be seriously injured or in pain, but i would let them do it until they grew out of it and never told my parents even when they were concerned by my bruises lol. I dont know why make these bad decisions all the way into adulthood. Not wanting advice necessarily, just wanted to get this out.
5 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 108448

>>108447
Thank you for putting a term to the behavior. I’ve heard of that before but never related it to myself, but yep. That describes a lot of my life. Fuck.

Anonymous 108452

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>>108448
I think I make it sound grim but this is not something you have to live with forever. You can still change.

I think that the reason why you still find yourself in situations where people treat you like trash is because you attract such people who love to take advantage of that.
If you have low self-esteem, dignity and self-worth, and you display these insecurities outside, knowingly or unknowingly, then this is what people will see as well.
People who don't like those things would stay away, people who are indifferent to it wouldn't care about you, and people who want to fix you [and fail because they can't and they're not qualified for it and eventually leave], or people will take advantage of these traits. They abuse you because you tolerate it and they can get away with it.
So once you start working on these things, and start to display positive traits, then people who admire those traits will be attracted towards you.

Regarding past memories where you were abused or bullied, there are ways to deal with that too. We are made up of our memories, but we can rewrite them by convincing our mind that something different happened. You can imagine that you're traveling to the past and then helping the younger you to fight against the bullies and assure yourself that you're there to protect her, or you can write a letter to her asking her to stay strong. There are other things that you can do.

It'll take time, but in the meanwhile don't get into these shitty relationships and hang around idiots. You're just opening past wounds over and over again if you do that without even letting it to heal.

Anonymous 108465

>>108452
Great post. (not OP but in a very similar situation down to being bullied by males)
I recently realized how much it was affecting me to hang out with "friends" that subtly denigrated me constantly and used me for narc supply, I was afraid that being alone would be worse and that my social skills would "atrophy" or whatever but the only thing that was doing was conditioning me to take more shit. Way better to just be alone for a while and make friends with yourself.

Anonymous 108481

>>108452
Thank you so much for this. It’s so nice to hear some empathetic and hopeful advice for a change.

Anonymous 108496

That's how you choose to express the anger that happens to everyone but you turn it onto yourself or you want to be treated like shit to express that life or life as a woman in this context since you mentioned the monogamy thing, makes you feel like a victim. Some women literally want to be beat to express how they feel as a woman in heterosexual relationships to express their position in life



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Self harm addiction general Anonymous 98173[Reply]

A place to talk about and vent this particular issue.

I suppose questions to get started (don't feel obligated to answer any of this though, venting is fine too):
>How long have you been self harming?
>What made you start?
>What types of self harm?
>are you trying to quit?
>any effective alternatives/ways to minimize harm?
>why do you self harm?
>how does this effect your daily life?
>any other places you go for support?
>Treatment for old scars/damage?
72 posts and 21 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 115450

>>115436
>sexy body
I would much rather keep my barcodes, thank you.

Anonymous 115462

IMG_5931.jpeg

>>115436
I thought I posted a response to this and maybe I forgot to press send

either way
>exercises
>is clean five months
>still ended up relapsing
>explain to me why endorphins from exercise aren't enough
>"w-why don't you just stop"
>its an addiction you dipshit

Anonymous 115463

I have dermatillomania and I feel like it'd be less embarrassing if I cut myself all over like the girl in sharp objects
I know that's horrible to say and isn't true but derma is uniquely disgusting and makes me look like I have scabies or leprosy or do drugs

Anonymous 115473

IMG_4841.jpeg

>how long have you been self harming?
The first time I did it, I was about 17. I used the blade from a pencil sharpener and did my arm. It was just one or two cuts, they were small and not that bad. Some time later I did my upper arm and stomach, I think I was about 19 or 20, I can’t remember. I’ve never really done it consistently. Last time I did it was back in January of this year, which was “better” than the previous times since I did it “right” if that makes sense. The scars look deeper and definitely deliberate since I used an exacto knife that time.
>what made you start?
Depression, hating myself, feeling a need to be punished for being a bad person or fucking up somehow. Shitty thing after shitty thing happening throughout my late teens, never getting therapy, and not having friends. There is also a small sense of control with it but that’s mostly with the eating thing. The eating thing also started out of feeling “ugly” and generally hating my body.
>what types of self harm?
Cutting, disordered eating. Sometimes I bite myself if I’m nervous. I pick at the skin around my fingernails to the point that it bleeds, also out of a nervous habit or boredom. I’ve done that since I was about 8 or so. I also squeeze my throat and kind of try to choke myself if I feel a lump in my throat, I did it the other day to stop myself from crying and it worked but I also coughed afterwards.
>are you trying to quit?
Sort of. I’ve been clean for about six months now. Last week was particularly bad since I kept thinking about slicing myself with a box cutter that I have. I didn’t do it, but I could almost feel the sensation. Last time I did it it felt really good, and the thought to do it again has been almost constant this past week. I’d rather relapse on the self harm than relapse on the disordered eating though.
>any effective alternatives/ways to minimize harm?
Be lazy. Be too lazy to buy new razor blades and be too lazy to get up from your bed and actually do it. Look for any possible distraction. Talk to friends if you have them. If you don’t, talk to chatbots of your favorite fictional characters. Draw, listen to music, read smutty fanfics. Writing is also good. I like to write about characters or I just journal.
>why do you self harm?
I feePost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 116536

>How long have you been self harming?
14 years on and off
>What made you start?
I had a classmate in middle school that told me about how he cut himself. I decided to try it for the hell of it and got hooked.
>What types of self harm?
Cutting though when I was really young and dramatic I would bang my head on stuff or rip my hair out looking for attention
>are you trying to quit?
I consider myself "clean" honestly since I only relapse once or twice a year though maybe that's addict logic
>any effective alternatives/ways to minimize harm?
Don't own anything you could use for it. It being hard to do effectively helps a lazy fuck like me
>why do you self harm?
I don't like feeling my emotions and it helped with that, just stops the overwhelming feelings right away. It brings relief
>how does this effect your daily life?
I'm scarred up as fuck and live in a place with hot weather so I gave up the long sleeves a decade ago. I go about my life deluding myself into thinking that no one really notices, obviously they do but fortunately most people are too polite to bring it up. Sometimes randos will point it out though and it bums me out. Hasn't stopped me from having friends or getting jobs, though.
>any other places you go for support?
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



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