/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>125983
update: ive made a pact with a fren to not overthink for all of october and just do things.

i call it "omit overthinking october"

so far i have talked to at least 5 people i have barely spoken to in the past year and it turns out they do not in fact bite

will see how the rest of the month goes

i recommend everyone tries this challenge

>>125984
Share pls

ok

>>125984
youre beyond youre prime anyways stop trying

Okay..

>>126152
So have you ever met in person?

>>126159
yes, frequently

It's ur right to not like those parts (I don't know from experience what it's like in the dating scene when ur lesbian cause I'm bi) but I don't think it's trans women's fault you can't get laid

>>125976
I can get laid and have just fine, just first time back in the dating scene in some time and it is wildly bad that for every female on an app if they're not just a porn bot, there's like 5 more accounts that are just dude's
Always the quickest to like your profile and most active because they are desperate

Also had a friend recently who had a very bad falling out with her friend who is MtF trans, kept getting aggressively touchy and cuddly at the bar even though she was actively saying no, so they turn around and tried making out with her boyfriend as if that would somehow bypass the no
They have become absolutely predatory at this point and it's worth being upset over

>>125973
sexual orientation is based on sex, and you can't change your sex no matter what surgery or drugs one does to oneself. there's nothing wrong with you and it's bullshit to feel like you have to explain yourself. i might suggest looking into activities over the apps, like crafting or volunteering. of course you'll run into the ftm girlies, but as sexist as they can be at least they're not rapey like >>125979

>>125973
It’s not just you. As a fellow fem4fem it’s just made it harder to wade through the muck, and it feels weird to have to relinquish what would be a completely feminine space to the invading sausage party for the social brownie points. A lot of the lesbian scene has been choked up polys trying to pawn their ugly boyfriend on me, or trans with hairy chests. I honestly have more luck in bars than on dating apps now, cause the bullshit you have to sift through just to find regular fem women is getting to be annoying asf.

Who is the girl in the pic? I feel like I recognise her but I also don’t

Just don’t do it, duh.

>>122465
it's nagyung from fromis_9!
>>122467
yeah you're right, I just get this desire to correct moids and teach them a lesson but my free time is too precious tbh

>>122472
Aw I should’ve known that, I used to listen to fun! religiously

>>122472
"You're right Nona. I'm sorry. I apologize for wasting your time."
What if he said this?

Pro's
>His physical appearance over all makes him look like a fairytale prince he's got neck length shaggy/slightly wavy dirty blonde hair he's got pale porcelain looking skin pink lips and grey eyes and he's tall (6'4)
>when he started dating he told me something that brought me back to earth it was "if you have a preconceived version of me in my head just throw it away"
>He has really good taste in fashion and decorating that baffles me because it's like a sixth sense to him
>He's always open to try kinks I want to do but he sets boundaries for things that make him uncomfortable aka getting physical and vocally rough and pegging
>He's always so prepared for example he has a plan to get the job he wanted set out while he was in middle school
>He has the nicest dad ever probably one of the best role models oat
>He has a knack for photography
>He is very kind and calm and has what his dad calls a "so it goes mentality"
>He can cook decently well for everything except steak which I swear he has some supernatural ability to make the most mouth watering steaks every time without fail
>He has angry bull levels of strength
>He uses a cologne that smells like oranges and honestly it fits him perfectly it matches his physical appearance and personality
>He's social but not overly social and has a good conscious on how to people please
>He is the sweetest with children he has younger cousins that are elementary school to toddler age and he's like a professional babysitter that gets zero pay
>He has a very broad music taste and put me onto duster
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>>117617
This is true. Women don't care about a man's height. It'd be crazy that even women here mostly would date a guy if he was only >6'

pros
>tall
>spoils me w money
>total virgin
>listens to me going insane

cons
>ldr
>9 years older (we met when i was 19)
>just graduated
>works minimum wage
>porn addict
>not emotional

>>105405
pros
>tall
>handsome,simmetrical face with masculine chin
>blonde hair and blue eyes but in not in a femboy way
>smart
>has a job
>metalhead

cons
>porn addict
>not really empathetic but still cares
>dont spend money on gifts

Pros
> has job that would survive AI job takeover apocalypse
> right amount of chubby
> tries his best to do things right by everyone
> decent morals
> is funny
> has interesting things to say

Cons
> does not practice what he preaches
> lies by omission unless you figure out the precise question to get the truth out of him
> completely impotent due to former(?) porn addiction
> brown

>>126216
I'm the first person that would know, you don't need to tell me again

>>126219
No I Think You Need To Be Reminded

>>126216
Literally whataboutism…
If it's unrelated, it's unrelated.
Unless whatever happened in the current situation is somehow caused by whatever went wrong in the past. But usually, it's something that's caused by not having fixed something that had already been wrong in the past. But even then, you could focus on solutions instead of just faulting someone to put them down. Some list shouldn't be the end of a discussion, even if the argument likely requires some pauses because people need time to process emotions and if they don't take the time, they might opt for whatever solution is the fastest rather than most effective.

Ok Kanaya Maryam

>>126193
None. I just wanted to know how others would react. Because I wouldn't know what to do. The situation would just be too surreal.

>>126199
Lol. No.

>>126193
Soy retard, or worse, soy pickme

>>126164
Trannies will never be prettier than real women. Only trannies and tranny chasers with porn addictions think otherwise. And that itself is extremely unattractive so I wouldn’t care. If I found out a man I was into wanted to get with a troon I would be repulsed by him. Also it’s kinda sad how ppl will callTIMs who have gotten so many surgeries and fillers attractive but will always be quick to tell actual women like let’s say kylie jenner they aren’t naturally beautiful and ugly because they looked different before surgery as well. Anyway troons are nothing but your average hideous moid with plastic surgery.

I don’t get jealous of men so I’d be ambivalent to it
Anyway shouldn’t futa enjoyers like transwomen? I don’t get why they’re not more in demand considering the type of porn is popular.

doesn’t even happen and is a jealous troid fantasy

I remember going out to get groceries like 6 years ago and seeing some hobo man standing on the other side of the road, jorking it. He was looking at me too, like expecting to see some sort of reaction. After that some car stopped near him and apparently he got chased off or something. idk

>>126141
Trent is back babyyyy

>>124862
I also don't get how so many people marathon crime shows or put them on as background noise.

>>125949
moids are pretty good at reality denial in general

>Particularly in class rooms and in the professional setting, women are PERCEIVED to speak more than they actually do. If women speak more than 30% of the total conversation, it is PERCEIVED as monopolizing the conversation.

>>118533
you could replace trump with alcohol and this post would fit well in prohibition. But That would hurt the nonas who cant put down the bottle too much to say

>>125949
>Most incels would've been utter normalfags if it weren't for their appearance

And most women would be incels if they hadn't been born women.

>>118525
Rodents

>>126182
>I struggle
>hate myself and blame it on lazyness
>but really I think it's just being overwhelmed and paralysed by the fear of failure.
Indeed, I agree with what >>126183 said, it's not really laziness if you're struggling and paralysed by a mental block.
I don't have diagnosed anxiety nor ADHD but I find that some resources for those can be useful for people's mental health in general, like the stuff about Executive Dysfunction, being kind to yourself and working on ways to follow your own plans while handling anxiety and the feeling of being overwhelmed by breaking things into small steps, changing your environment, approaching things more slowly, stuff like that. What helps will depend on the person but for me, I work much better when I just have someone else to work with or alongside with, even if that's just strangers at the library when I study there. The change of environment helps too. Also, addressing the fear of failure, like, what does failure mean to you? Wouldn't there be a second attempt or another good thing you can do instead if this attempt at whatever you're working on doesn't work out? Also, the economy sucks right now and everyone is at a different starting position, so even if you struggle, don't self-internalise it all as your fault, things in society really could be better… Like, taking responsibility for bettering your life and trying your best is one thing, but you're already doing that and I think you can and should take pride in it.

>>126186
Despite everyone having their strengths and weaknesses, and advanced knowledge in subject not being necessary for the layman, it is demoralizing to not have the algebraic ability to pass secondary school math courses. Unfortunately, no amount of hardwork has lead to meaningful progress in this domain. Even though dyscalculia exists, the myth of not being a "maths person" is problematic to me. It comes down to the quality of maths instruction, alongside the attitudes instilled in you towards math. Obviously, not every secondary school graduate is proficient in algebra. In fact, in many western countries mathematics performance is declining.

I am grateful for resources, unfortunately, I'm familiar with everything listed.Thank you for the effort anyway; it's much appreciated. Need not feel bad, I neglected to state I have an extensive list of resources I compiled.

I'm glad that you mentioned public libraries. Although, it's true that some public libraries offer workshops, tutoring, classes, and other resources, my public library is barebones.

Regardless of these resources not being relevant to me, I hope that it will help another adult learner. God bless sharing this information.

With that out of the way, I have an abundance of information I have yet to make use of. My problem lies in navigating a poorly funded adult education system. Not having equivalency is creating immense issues for me. Essentially, I'm unable to progress in life: lots of jobs are inaccessible to those with less than a secondary school diploma, and universities often gatekeep access to higher education for those without a secondary school diploma. Although, it is likely I can go to university a mature student, the standard admissions require specific secondary school credits.
The quality of adult education is abysmal. Society does not see the economic benefit of uplifting adult learners. What this means for me is I am trapped with obsolete correspondence courses without guidance, despite it wreaking havoc on my wellbeing. As an educational neglect survivor, who was denied enrollment to secondary school by my parent for being"retarded", trying to overcome these challenges in a system that does not support me is exhausting.

It's well understood that learning is hindered when in a survival state. For me, formal education is a necessity. CertaPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

I haven't done any schooling since I was 14. I have passable verbal intelligence, and that fools people because my words are all they're interacting with, but I have middle school level knowledge in mathematics, science, everything else.

Ultimately I think I'm just built for unskilled work, for the same set of personal flaws that had me drop out of school in the first place.

>>126190
Unskilled labor is important. Earning an honest living with a menial job is commendable. It's okay to not excel in skilled trades, or regulated occupations. After all, these unskilled jobs are often essential to the functioning of society, we cannot all be white-collar workers.

For those who are deficient in mathematics and science,which rely heavily on critical thinking, abstract thinking, and problem solving skills, the ability to present your ideas verbally and in writing coherently is a mask. Admittedly, this feels like hiding that you are an imbecile. However, imposter syndrome causes you to feel like you are a fraud even when you are successful.

Although the circumstances of anon are unclear, I sense that they have low self-esteem based on how they are talking about themself. A minor who dropped out is in crisis. A well-supported teenager does not make such a life-changing decision. Not to mention, when a teenager drops out, their parent, or guardian has to be okay with their decision. In a household where education is valued, and the parents are in tune with their childrens needs, dropping out would not be on the table. It is okay to grieve the opportunities you lost for not graduating high school, but enduring struggle does not make you worthless.

>>126191
>the ability to present your ideas verbally and in writing coherently is a mask
It's not inherently a mask, it's its own skill.
I know people who are well-versed in math but really struggle to convey the most basic information in a comprehensive manner.