>>126444OP, if you are still here I think I can understand.
What you should do is to speak to your BF because you will get over it together or not at all.
Make him understand your problem and try to solve it, if for no other reason because otherwise he will stay dry.
The solution I propose is to have him be the receiving end. There is no need for penetration, play with him and tell him what to do.
If that is not reasuring enough, have him sexualized while you are not. Make him be naked for a full weekend, make him tell you how he value you as a person while you call him a walking dildo. This sort of thing will reasure you that you are not his lesser and that sex is neither humiliating nor submisive.