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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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friendless thread Anonymous 110737[Reply]

post here if you have no friends IRL. how did it happen? are you content with it? or just talk about whatever you want.
30 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 111617

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I feel so hopeless about how pretty much all of my friendships and relationships devolve into them berating me, insulting me, ignoring me, constantly cutting me off, leaving me out of things, feeling that hanging out with me is a chore and gossipping about me. I don't know if I have a target painted on my back or I'm just that fucking irritating to be around. It feels like no matter how much I try to build up, I only end up losing. I find one friend, we spend an enjoyable time together, I find another one, yay, now I have two friends!! and suddenly the first friend starts slowly phasing me out of their life. Maybe they were only hanging out with me out of pity?

The latest one was a person that I've known for 5 years. To be fair, he's also my ex, but I was under the impression that we've resolved all that circus and could genuinely continue hanging out after a year of pause. I know it sounds pathetic, but he's the only person who's ever gotten to know the real me, the only person I ever felt could understand me, the only person that I've truly felt joy hanging out with. But I guess even that has come to an end, because starting a few months back, all these things that he used to like about me, and other small things that imo don't even matter have started getting on his nerves to the point of publicly freaking out on me, with passers-by and the entire coffee shop clientele listening. The reason: I moved out of the way of some people who were filming in public and seemed bothered by us in the frame. I lightly urged him to come closer to me, and he blew up saying that I'm embarrassed of him, that I'm an abusive bitch, that he hates my mode of existence, hates how pointlessly self-aware I am of other people's eyes on me and how fucking pathetic that is (nevermind that at the beginning of the relationship we bonded over our shared experience of social anxiety), that I'm wasting his time, that I just want to argue etc. Once again, in public. And yet he has friends, and I don't. Female friends, who have completely frozen me out of their group, but he's fine. And all that after indulging me with talks about "how he's realized that he actually hates women" and all that tirade on people with mental illnesses or whatever the fuck. But the slimey fuck would never say it to their faces, and they would never believe my hysterical, crazy ass, right? 100% of all of our mutual female acquintances (and I was the one to introduce every. Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 111647

I can get away with it because my family is big and we're close, which in the end might be better or not but it does make me feel empty

Like, once grandma dies and the family stops being so tight knit I might be done for.

Anonymous 111839

I did it on purpose when I was 15 years old. In my country thats the year when we ably for secondary education (either high school or vocational school) so I applied to school I knew no one I know applied. I didn't make any friends in the new school and I blocked all the new people. It's my fault but I felt like my past was holding me back and those people remind of it, I wanted fresh start.

Anonymous 112385

>>111839
I did the exact same thing. Now I'm in university and I'm so lonely it's making me suicidal but I don't know how to make friends. I don't want to drink or go to parties or any other student events and my hobbies are solitary. The only way I meet new people is through classes but people there are either too hard to reach or I don't hit it off with anyone. I don't know any friend finding websites for my area either that aren't filled with normies and gendies.

Anonymous 112436

>>111617
I can kind of relate. In my case, I have precious few people in my life that actually care about me. Everyone else just tolerates me enough to get something from me and then leave as soon as I put up boundaries. I’m admittedly hyper vigilant when it comes to other people’s feelings and I’m quick to apologize if someone is upset with me, but I never get the same courtesy in return. No matter how I say things, people dismiss my feelings and never take me seriously until I pop off one day and then that’s it for the relationship— they don’t try to understand my perspective, they don’t care that I’m hurt, they just see me get angry and cry and cut me off. It’s not like I’m throwing things or anything, I’m literally upset that my feelings keep getting ignored.

Then I met somebody that had the same issue you have where people just seem to resent them out of nowhere and betray them. We actually had a lot in common and I enjoyed talking to her but she had an issue where she’d explode on me over seemingly nothing. I tried so hard to be compassionate and understanding, but eventually her tantrums got the better of me. She was super defensive, so we could never talk about why she was getting triggered and she never really apologized and when she did apologize it was after you and she’d literally say stuff like, “we’re so silly lol I’m sorry too you know what they say hurt people hurt people blah blah blah” and if I told her how I was feeling she’d completely dismiss me. In the end, I exploded on her after getting yelled at once again and the friendship is over.

I say all this but I don’t have any advice. I guess all I can offer is solidarity because shit is lonely out here.


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Having Chad and Stacy Relatives Is Pure Hell Anonymous 112225[Reply]

>Went to a family party.
>All the cousins end up splitting off in another room , away from the main party.
>My female cousin (who called me the ugliest person in the room )waltzes in with her new boyfriend.
>The topic of relationships comes up.
>My male cousin reveals his body count is now 4 (he lost his virginity when he was 15).
>Her sister says the only reason she’s not in a relationship is because she gets bored of guys too quickly
>I realize that even though I’m the oldest person in the room, I have the least amount of relationship experience.
>I haven’t even held hands with a guy yet while my baby cousins are drowning in romantic and sexual attention.
>Fuck my life.
9 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112355

machiavelli.png

>>112352
i thought you were talking about this video: https://youtu.be/d6iQrh2TK98?si=1f8BbCsHwdq-GvM8&t=727 what you were saying sounded similar.
>The most important thing is that you want the normie to feel dumber around you, because it deprives the normie of power.
youre thinking like a real person and not like a normie. of course reason is power, but normies only see money, looks, and relationships as power. you trying to flaunt how knowledgeable you are to a normie is like showing your dog dollar bills: it makes no sense to them. And since normals rule the whole world, they decide what creates power, not us. Reminding the normie that they are dumb doesnt deprive them of any power. If anything, it's just a way for you to cope with the fact they see you as inferior due to your autism.
If you want the real-world benefits of being normie-passing (it's fine if you dont, but it sounds like OP does) then you have to play the game by their rules. If you make normies feel good by being around you, theyll do shit for you to make sure you stick around and think highly of them. For example, somebody like you could use your intellect to make normals feel smart and important in your presence. "Nona likes talking to me about smart topics like math, i must be smart like her. I want to keep feeling this way and learning from her so let me make sure to do favors for her so she keeps spending time with me." If you aren't as academically gifted, you can do this with pretty much anything. "Nona is so attractive and she likes spending time with me. this must mean i am of high value like her. I should do favors for her and buy her shit to make sure she keeps spending time with me." Once you do this with enough normies, you build a network of connections. This makes other normies think you are an important person and can be used to secure better connections. I have used this method to get simps to buy me shit, scholarships, and an internship. turn yourself into somebody people want to have around, and they will bend over backwards for you.

Anonymous 112363

>>112355
>this video
Oh damn he's talking about a similar problem lol, but I was just taking the more open "what's the probability the nth piece is the largest without any additional knowledge." He makes a mistake at 15:05 - the "1" in the sum should become a "1/S". Optimal stoppings become even more interesting if you assume a non-uniform underlying distribution. What's the probability we'll stop replying here?

>normies don't think like this
Correct but they still feel shame. Their go to defense is "I was never really a maths person." They try circumvent "I'm lazy" or "I'm stupid" by asserting (implicitly) that some people are just born with the magic ability to do maths better than them. The defense is torn apart easily when you say "yeah I had to do lots of homework to get good at it, no one's really born a maths person." You've ruined their defense. It's fun.

>normals rule the whole world, they decide what creates power
I diverge in opinion, normals don't even rule their choice of what to eat for breakfast, let alone the world. They are ran by the world, manipulated to a T. If the world were a car, the person ruling the world would be behind the wheel. In this case, normies are the petrol that's wasted to keep the car idling while you're waiting for the hubby to buckle the kids in the back seat. They're bent to the whim of the rulers, and they will be exploited in an instant - and enjoy it.

> "Nona likes talking to me about smart topics like math, i must be smart like her….
Yes, normies are easily exploited. The downside is you have to hang around them, which ultimately makes you the normie. Like you, for example - you're just a manipulative normie. Not a criticism, an observation. What you "get" from relationships can be summarised as "stuff". My end goal is not "stuff" - the moment I start wanting 'stuff' please for the love of God put a bullet in the back of my head. I have no desire to play that game, there is no winning or losing, only despair.

Anonymous 112369

happywomen.jpeg

>>112363
after wasting my youth being autistic, I decided I didnt want to be an autistic loser anymore. I studied animal behaviors, psychology, and politics then applied the same to humans so i could build the perfect persona. after lots of trial and error i have a few personas to use for different situations. I now get the best of both worlds. I'm free minded and dont fall into vapid traps that consume normals, but also get the material benefits of using normies to my advantage.
>normals don't even rule their choice of what to eat for breakfast, let alone the world
the normie behind the desk at your job interview decides if you get the job based on whether he or she likes you, not your skillset. Your superiors at work decide if you get the promotion based on whether they like you or not. The normies around you decide if youll have a hard time or easy time depending on if they like you or not. Sure, the people at the top 1% of the 1% are just using the normie's social structure to control them, but im never going to get there. For all intents and purposes, my life is ruled by normals. Most likely yours is too. The fact that you can see it means you are capable of learning to exploit it (if you wanted to).
>you're just a manipulative normie
i have officially ascended. thank you everybody. goodbye

Anonymous 112371

>>112342
You sound cool to hang out with, depending on the tone you used ib that example. I'm awful at math (memorizing my time-tables in my 30s because I didn't study as a kid) but your comnent about the cake slices would interest me and I'd want to make a guess at which slice would be biggest, too.

I'm not a normie, just kind of a failed cyborg. I feel like people at either extreme can really flourish if they're passionate about something and aren't afraid to TALK.

Anonymous 112388

>>112369
>the normie behind the desk at your job interview decides if you get the job based on whether he or she likes you, not your skillset.
This is only true if your skillset is common, run-of-the-mill-type stuff. It's also only true if you're applying for a job and not creating your own job. The point is to put effort into people who matter.

>I have ascended
You've only risen above that which sinks easily. You considered yourself a "loser" in your youth. What exactly made you a loser? What game did you lose, and did you choose to play it? I would suggest media study as an extension to your previous ones, if you haven't already. McLuhan et al.

>>112371
Thanks, potentially. There's a neat trick for multiplying numbers in their teens.

Take 17*18 for example
17+8=25

7*8=56

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.


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Anonymous 112227[Reply]

i feel so annoyed towards normies who lie about having xyz disorder. i have ADD (ADHD without hyperactivity) and people don't believe me. i think huge reason is because normies lie about having ADHD because they ruined their focus span on tiktok and it's cool thing to have so people don't believe and they just think internet causes that.

ADD isn't just about bad focus, it affects my whole life. i am less capable literally than someone normal idc about normies saying it's superpower or wtf. shut up. i read same text 10 times but i don't know what it says because i can't focus and then get yelled by teacher for "not studying" for example. i forget, no talents, hard to keep anything up because i can't focus enough that i would be good. for example you see my English is bad, it's because i haven't study it at all i "learned" english by youtube. etc there are so many things i can't listen all and then some normie says "haha im soo adhd cant focus on this boring book"
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112231

tiktok dealt a death blow to this, still remember one on some imbecile making silly "distracted" faces and saying this is what ADD was like.

Anonymous 112235

>>112228
yeah. i think here too even tho we use different diagnosis criteria so it's harder to get one (i assume than in the usa) but still feels like many people who are neurotypical get wrong diagnosis. thank you maybe one day.

>>112231
for sure, seems like many bad trends come from there

Anonymous 112247

I hate tiktok fakers, they wouldn't last one day with the disorders they claim to have

Anonymous 112303

warakami vaporwave…

>>112228
I'm gonna derail for a second, but honestly, the effect this stuff has had on society and child-development makes me think it should be strictly regulated the same way alcohol, cigarettes or eve drugs are. Not just TikTok, but all of these predatory ad-revenue subsisted services on the internet in general (though not completely banned of course; the information and creativity they offer is a good thing, it just needs to take on a different form). In fact, I'm pretty sure most websites with an option to register used to have a 14-year old age limit back in the day. What happened to that? Too easy to bypass? Or is datamining the entire population from infancy too alluring a prize?

And like, even if there really is a natural surge of ADHD and other attention disorders unrelated to TikTok, aren't we still undermining society if we're letting this one especially vulerable group of people become pray to superintelligent systems literally designed to manipulate them and take advantage of their fucked up braintype? They should be out there using their skills for hunting or whatever the fuck, not sitting in a box glued to a screen.

Anonymous 112318

I get interesting answers when I ask those types if it affected their ability to stay in work, pay bills, not fail class and brush teeth etc like me before I was diagnosed and medicated.


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are men capable of genuine love? Anonymous 110818[Reply]

so last month this guy that i've been talking to for a while confessed to me. his confession seemed genuine, and i was flattered since a man has never shown romantic interest in me before. last week i was speaking with one of his friends and apparently the guy only ever talks about me sexually, he just fetishizes me and didn't mean anything he said in his confession. after observing his other friends, i realized that they're all like this. men only befriend you because they want to hit, are they even capable of actual love? is it something to do with this generation? i'm scared to ever talk to a man ever again, probably won't.
65 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112226

lots of evidence both biologically and historically to show that men do not have a good track record of actually being monogamous and actually happy in monogamy. Now that part has always been there, and now they are just becoming increasingly perverted degens. I think we aught to only use them for breeding new radfem spawn, all the current men are toast.

Anonymous 112248

There's this belief they can, once.

Anonymous 112250

>>112248
>>110818
Reminds me of Nobel prize winning scientist and notorious manwhore Richard Feynman. He had 3 wives, would sleep with his students, prostitutes and several of his colleagues wives. He wrote books about how to pick up women by treating them like shit.

Buuuut he was deeply in love with his childhood sweetheart, who he married despite her terminal tuberculosis and their families objection. He would continue to read her letters and write to her after she died, up till the day he died.

Anonymous 112305

>>112304
You clearly don’t have fantastic empathy.

Anonymous 112309

>>112304
go to war, dilate, 41%, 88% etc


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Unsent letters Anonymous 2119[Reply]

Ever wanted to give someone a piece of your mind but you know you'd just regret it? Post in here and get it off your chest.
467 posts and 86 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 111951

Dear Rachael

I don't know why you are ignoring me. It hurts. I have been there for the late night talks. Hours of you wanting to be liked, wanting to be loved, I understand that I cant give you what you want, but I offered you friendship and I send this letter in blood, sweat and tears, but I Know you are too much of a coward to accept it. So fuck you. Sincerely-Me.

Anonymous 111959

DEAR X

LEAVE YOUR ABUSIVE HUSBAND ALREADY JESUS FUCKING CHRIST IT BREAKS MY HEART TO SEE YOU HAVE MOMENTS OF SELF AWARENESS ONLY TO ALWAYS END UP GOING BACK TO HIM

I WILL NEVER STOP BEING PATIENT WITH YOU AND ROOTING FOR YOU

BUT YOU ARE MAKING IT SO HARD

</3

Anonymous 112036

What on earth do you want now? I said everything I meant. I thought you wanted me out of your life.
I wouldn’t mind spending time with you again, really. It’s this sickness in me. This obsession, which you know about. Now you know everything and yet you’re still there. Why?
I wish you would just come out and say whatever is on your mind but you’re incapable. And I’m incapable of closing the door forever. Idiot (both of us).

Anonymous 112213

19446-ysiel-windsi…

dear ysiel,

I really don't know how it feels. You've been through so much. All I know is that it felt right for us to be together and that I cannot get you out of my head. I'm not sure the reason I was pushed away this time, I'm sorry if I was too forward. If you ever want to chat I will accept you with open arms and no judgement. The memories we made just play on repeat in my head all day even after all these years. I'll miss you forever, and I hope you find peace.

Anonymous 112293

D,

I'm sorry I've always been an awful big sister. I know it's late but I'm going to try to make things up to you.


high-school-studen…

how the fuck do i control kids with a timid personality and a small frame being a teacher? Anonymous 110272[Reply]

having no experience in working as a teacher for now im just asked to do desk work and to observe other teachers to learn from them, but yesterday as someone was busy i was asked to cover for them and it was a really embarassing day for me.
some kids used their cell phones in class, and i grabbed one of their phones but just as i turned back to do something the phone was gone and someone swiped it back. maybe 20% of the class listened to what i was saying while the rest were just talking or sleeping. some of them didnt finish their homework and were copying them in class. some of them didnt care about me when i asked to submit their homework notes even if it was empty and only like 10% of them gave their notebooks. one kid didnt even notice that i was standing next to him and was using his phone and scrolling instagram. some kids started to ask me if i am in a relationship and my age and my personal details and being the oversharing idiot i am i was responding to them and saw them sisterly. theyre girls so its cool but later i realized its very unprofessional.
i felt disturbed by all this and went to another teacher and she told me that im supposed to control the class and that i dont have to be tyrannical but i have to explain what theyre doing is wrong and make them face the consequences for their rule breaks and i just dont know what to do. one thing she told me that affected me the most is that "you are not their friend" and "dont let them call you "sis".

there are some teachers who are scary and also tyrannical ways to control students like shaming them for being dumb but i feel that these things are so wrong. i dont want to make the kids feel bad and traumatize them but at the same time i wish i also knew how to control them and make them be decent so that i dont get fired for being a poor teacher. there are rules that i shouldnt abuse, even verbally, but other teachers dont seem to care and call them horrible names.
21 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 111093

>>111058
>If it got really bad I'd lock out the bad kids.
Lock out as in asking them to leave the classroom?

P111059
There is a no phone rule where I work but it's not really "enforced" properly because of negligence and irresponsibility. They collect cellphones every morning but they don't really count it and some students lie that they didn't bring their phones. I think some students even keep it in their undergarments and we can't really frisk them because there's a no touch policy.

>I hope you find a solution soon and stay sane lol.
Yeah, it's quite hectic. I have to deal with both incompetency in the workforce and antisocial behavior in students. There's no rest.

Anonymous 111206

>>111093
>Lock out as in asking them to leave the classroom?
Pretty much. Locking the door so that physically violent kids can't get in, or taking the rest of the class somewhere else. I don't think they'd leave if I asked them, but maybe they would because then they just go home. Ideally I'd just want the violent ones expelled; instead we coddle them because they come from a trauma background. A kid comes to school with a knife, we call police to remove him, and half the staff are upset that we're turning away someone who has nowhere else to go. School isn't a recovery house, but more and more discourse is subtly giving us the roll of therapist without the pay of therapist.

>incompetency in the workforce and antisocial behavior in students.
Had an older teacher say he's "not good with technology". He wanted to make text bold in MS word. Infuriating, you could say.

Anonymous 111215

>>110982
>Um, nonas seeing all these replies make me think that teaching is a job where narcissists and psychopaths thrive.
Gee you think

>position of power over a microcosm that you rule
>plenty of opportunities to be manipulative and controlling over a whole bunch of individuals
>can even be psychopathic and abusive and very easily get away with it unless the administration is really on top of things (when does that ever happen)
>shit pay, mediocre hours, highly unpleasant environment if you DON'T enjoy manipulating and controlling the students (because then you are the one they will be trying to abuse)

Anonymous 111831

>>111215
>im a dropout with nothing to show for my life so i still hate and a-log my teachers

how are people not over shit that happened to them in high school get over yourself

Anonymous 112236

>>111831
I have a Master's actually. And of all the teachers I met in school, a minority was actually capable of empathy, the majority was complete garbage.

Professors are completely different, because becoming a professor is an extremely prestigious career, plus they get to do research rather than just teaching. The worst professors I had at university were just the kind who clearly wanted to sit in their lab and treated their classes as an annoying job obligation. None of them actually lorded over the students. (I've heard of stories of abusive professors when it comes to like PhD mentorship, but even that is not exceedingly widespread.)


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I Despise Reddit Moids Anonymous 112229[Reply]

They are so incredibly obnoxious and annoying. I used to exclusively use female only subreddits to avoid interacting with them. Unfortunately that didn’t work because moids stalk every sub with a large concentration of women and hit on every female poster/commenter in sight by spamming their PMs. I really liked FAW sub but every time I comment there some male redditor, usually active in dozens of porn subreddits, would message me some coomer shit.

Anonymous 112230

1C5E6BC4-7F48-467C…

>>112229
lol reminded me of this. Also yes, reddit is just a porn site.

Anonymous 112234

>>112230
This reminds me of when a redditor who was self-proclaimed “redpilled” called me terf scum. Misogyny is acceptable to these people but critiquing troons is apparently going too far.


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Tik Tok Crushes Anonymous 111974[Reply]

The hottest boy ever will just pop up on your FYP on Tik Tok and it fucking sucks knowing you'd never get a chance with him, even if you did know him irl he wouldn't look your way because your ugly.

Anonymous 112000

Go back zoomer

Anonymous 112150

I don't use TikTok but nona hot boys aren't worth it. The most attractive men always have the worst mental problems.

Anonymous 112233

You probably wouldn't like him either because so much of it relies on camera tricks


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Anonymous 112110[Reply]

I made my boyfriend a playlist and he never listened to it. I checked his last fm just out of curiosity, and he never did. It’s been weeks. Perhaps I am overthinking it, but I’ve also never made a gesture like this before. I’ve never been the type to make a playlist for a man. So it hurts just a bit to have this gesture be seemingly forgotten. I wish there was a way to nudge at him to listen to it without revealing i skimmed his last fm to see if he had listened.
12 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 112186

>>112184
sounds like he really does not appreciate you then, especially if playlists are part of his love language

Anonymous 112196

>>112186
We’ve only been seeing each other for a little over 3 months. Could it just take time for it to develop?

Anonymous 112199

>>112186
>>112196
I don't think you should jump to conclusions too fast over a single playlist. If he really doesn't appreciate you, there should be other clues/instances.

Anonymous 112203

>>112196
three months isn't that long, maybe he just doesn't quite love you yet

Anonymous 112211

>>112199
That’s what I think I could be overreacting because it’s just one thing, I just happened to be particularly sensitive about it I believe because it’s new to me.


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Why are moids so unaware of themselves? Anonymous 111134[Reply]

Why are Moids incapable of even basic emotional cognition? Is it biological or societal?
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 111143

>>111135
The majority of the population, male and female, are not capable of introspection. We simply learn to be more mindful of others, and by extension ourselves, as children because of the way girls socialise and, just as importantly, bully each other. Moids who are capable of introspection are already so stunted by childhood and adolescent behaviours that by adulthood they see sensitivity and emotional depth as weakspots others can exploit, not anything valuable. Worryingly, men capable of introspection that remain sensitive and emotional also tend find more success in interpersonal relationships with women than men, and so become better, even reflexive, manipulators who subconsciously target women because it boosts their ego and self-worth.

I have a moid who's capable of self-reflection, but is so cut off from his own emotional needs that he requires outside stimulation to recognise them in others. He has to set calendar reminders to do something romantic and timers to remind him to give me physical affection, because he's so programmed to ignore those things that he simply can't spontaneously think to give them to the people he loves.

Anonymous 111144

>>111134
Because it is stamped out of them by bourgeois society.
Given it's goal of ever increasing profits, porky tends to push to optimize society to it's needs. In the case of males, this means having the largest mass of labour possible: a people of worker ants that will follow orders.
This in turn means that aspects that are unimportant to the needs of the bouj such as emotional cognition, self-care, etc are repressed or otherwise disincetivized in favour of traits which are more functional to production like competition, hierarchy-cuckery, "stoicism" etc.
Of course not all aspects of the emotional experience can be repressed, notably those that arise from exploitation like anger, but in general porky tends to try redirect those towards it's needs.

Anonymous 111145

>>111134
It's not societal. You either have emotional intelligence or you don't.

Anonymous 111149

>>111134
This is tangential, but I think if you find him, he'll be offline. It seems like everything online is either ragebait, propaganda, or both. The longer you spend online, the more likely it is that original thoughts are replaced by circular rage-inducing thoughts, and by thought-terminating cliches; the more likely it is that, upon hearing someone's experiences, you dismiss it and put someone in a box instead of empathizing or thinking about what they said.
But not spending much time online still doesn't make someone intelligent. A moid who is self-aware enough to regulate his own emotions and break unhealthy patterns of thought probably puts conscious effort into maintaining his physical and mental health. He probably has hobbies instead of reading internet ragebait, and probably reads books and is curious about the world. Maybe you should go flirt with guys at your local library or something lol. But no one is at the library anymore; it's like a ghost town whenever I visit.

Anonymous 112127

>>111135
The men you're looking for exist, but they're ugly.


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