/x/ - /x/

>>573
Could be potentially easier and cheaper by setting a controlled fire inside your car and locking everything, but dont do it

>>9856
>>6598
Back on this thread 3 years after my initial post. Relationship fell apart after 2 and a half years and I'm living alone in a city with not a single friend or support system. I'm doing uni and even started an antidepressant in hopes of improving my mood but I'm still suffering from the same issues, unable to perform most tasks, can't engage with hobbies and interests etc. I am not really alive, just here.

Suicide is such a beautiful dream to escape into. Dreaming about waking up dead, being hit by a car, dying of disease and finally having some physical manifestation of what's going on inside. I'm craving an end to pain. I'm not fully committed to the idea as I don't think I've hit rock bottom just yet. I still crave love and conncetion though it's extremely far out of reach. Do you guys feel like it was doomed from the start? When I recall my memories it seems there was always a veil of tragedy and quiet alienation over my life. I'm going to keep trying for now but I'm researching methods in the background for when I inevitably give up again.

>>11758
i recommend sasu forum. i hope you find the peace you are looking for.

every now and then I hear about a bunch of dumbasses die because they ran their car in a garage for warmth
makes me wonder is it really that easy to die sometimes

>>11778
>makes me wonder is it really that easy to die sometimes
Yeah it is. I lost my grandma because she got a fucking bug bite while on a vacation and contracted a rare strand of cancer from it. That could've been anyone, you, me, someone we know, literally anyone can die that way and it's horrifying. Makes me feel almost agoraphobic.

I wish I wasn't so scared of death and what happens after so I could just kill myself and get life over with. I feel existential lots of the time because it's likely there's nothing after death which just makes death and loss more difficult. I don't kill myself because I'm scared of everything just ending and also I'm scared of possible repercussions after death

>>11908
I also wouldn't trust men to tripsit, I've seen many men admit that raping someone who's on drugs is their fantasy

>>11876
I had one by accident, I got weed that was laced with it. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. Literal hell dimension.

>>11926
Yeah I've heard lots of stories about people who feel like they visited the afterlife and how hellish trips make them never want to die

My theory based on stuff like near death experiences is that they have some underlying issues that causes their negative emotions to flare up and form into a realm/creatures but that's a complete conspiracy and I have no real proof for it honestly. Maybe it's a prison planet or it's just our brains being weird, who knows

>>11929
For me personally it felt very distinctly (don't ask me how I knew, I just did) that I was being trapped in a "punishment dimension" that was made out of every negative thing I ever did or thought or had happen to me, like a culmination of all the negative energy I ever encountered. I'm not spiritual in the slightest, I think it's interesting how drugs have very specific ways to interact with the human brain and I guess this is just what salvia does. I was trapped all alone in the universe knowing I would never have a human experience again like talking to friends or eating, I was fully isolated and removed from a physical body experience, and at the same time I could look around myself (not in the room I was in but drifting through a landscape) and everything was just covered with a thin veneer of normalcy but underneath I could see flesh pulsing. It was awful because I knew I was tripping and thought I had just smoked a normal joint, which wouldn't even get me super stoned usually, so I thought I had fried my brain the way you sometimes hear it with people who develop a weed psychosis or something. So I was 100% aware of what was going on and my only logical conclusion was that I was experiencing locked-in syndrome and wouldn't come out of it. I was visiting my mom at the time, and she woke up somehow and found me wheezing on the ground, when she found me it exacerbated my panic because I was convinced she would have to call an ambulance and they would put me away in a ward for people who broke their brains irreparably. If I had been alone maybe I would have killed myself from the hopelessness of it all.

>>11932
I think it's been proven psychedelics reduce brain activity (or possibly reroute it) so it's very possible you entered some weird realm of your thoughts. Then again some experiences are super random like people fighting with SoundCloud rappers or hallucinating bags of onions talking to them, some accurately produce near death experience results like tunnels, life reviews and seeing deceased loved ones

The funeral industry is exploitative and full of people using society's "don't talk about death" stigma to push Christian shit onto the dead even when they didn't follow that religion. I remember seeing a story of a taoist woman who was given a Catholic themed funeral, it's pretty clear this industry is full of some nasty behavior

>>11930
Relatives alone are responsible for carrying out the last will of the deceased. If relatives fail to do so, getting sent off according to local customs shouldn't come as surprise.

He is the type of guy that will hire impersonator just so people will talk about how he got killed and replaced by a double.

Not her but agree with >>11911
He is the kind to make up conspiracies about himself or do retarded shit just to attention whore

>>11909
I think the Jim Carrey nona has been MIA since 2024

>>11914
Couldn't blame her for being MIA. He seems like a psycho

I think I’m biased towards cynicism but I think it’s all over

I'm not sure how nonas find peace in eternal nothingness. I think only having a very shor amount of time to have a chance to experience love, pain, etc any emotion is in itself cruel and unfair. The fact that each person is unique and beautiful (except for 90% of moids) but will inevitably fade away never to be seen again and b e forgotten some day is terrible.

But at the same time i find it hard to believe we just become "nothing". We still don't fully know how sentience works and for all we know this life we have right now is not our sentience's first. Maybe we die and as universe re-births itself so does our sentience. We have a different physical body but the sentience remains. or maybe this is all incorrect…

That's why it's so terrifying, the fact that we don't know. We don't know why the unvierse exists, why the space works like it does. We don't know what it all came from, the planets, the galaxies, and where it will disappear and if it might remake itself. We are just that insignificant

>>10878
Long reply but I have many thoughts. I see both sides because every option scares me. Endless reincarnation fucks me up cuz just imagine all that could/would happen (being born in 3rd world countries in the middle of war, tortured with alien technology on a distant planet, maybe even eventually living the same life again, 1914729938029272 bad lifetimes in a row) or just generally having to live through everything ever imagined. Hell scares me cuz endless torture. Heaven scares me cuz you could be there for an astronomical amount of time and it won’t be any closer to ending and could become psychological torture (look up SCP-7179 if you wanna see more about that). You’re right that never existing again is horrifying as well and I don’t know if I believe something like enlightenment exists like in Eastern religion. I just feel constantly pessimistic, cynical, and nihilistic so maybe that’s why I’m not able to stick to any belief. If our existence is finite then nothing we do matters and will be forgotten if it’s infinite then it doesn’t matter if you were Hitler, an average person, or Junko Furuta because all your actions are finite and don’t even remotely mean anything to an existence that goes on forever though I guess that depends on if you believe in a dualistic or non dualistic religion. I agree it’s all very disorienting and religion doesn’t exactly give the deepest answer for why it is this way. I mean hey if reincarnation is real what will this lifetime matter after the universe dies and rebirths itself trillions of times over? I really don’t know how to get out of this mindset beyond just hoping more people understand it and trying to push it to the back of my head, existential dread is not fun

I’m very scared by the thought of eternity so I feel like it may be eternally torturous no matter what. Imagining going through anything for trillions to googolplexes to Graham’s Numbers of years and beyond and it just never getting a second closer to ending is deeply horrifying. The speech that starts at 1:18 in this video really speaks to me. In terms of what I think may actually happen though, I think death is likely the end because all evidence points us to consciousness being a neurological process but I wish we had evidence that it may not be. Near Death Experiences are interesting but honestly I don’t know if they’re real and they’re pretty inconsistent so even if they are real I don’t think they give any information about what comes after.

Current evidence points to the idea that everything ends but I'd like to believe otherwise, I'm scared by the idea of eternity though

I had a couple. I had a bad infection from a cat scratch on my neck as a kid that had me in the hospital for a while, and I got into a roll-over accident going 105mph. The air time I got felt like an eternity and it still plays in my head when I'm doing really bad

I tried to kill myself a little over a year ago by cutting my wrists. Definitely the closest I've come to dying. Very surreal experience.

>>3185
Not an NDE, but once at PE lesson just when I was about to be hit by the ball, time has literally slowed down for me and I deflected the ball. It was maybe 2 secs at most but for me it was like 5 seconds. Now I know it was an adrenaline burst or something like that.

I had a girl try to drown me when I was 8. She was up on a floaty and I was in the water. She would pull me up by my hair, laugh at me, and then push me back into the water and hold me there. I would thrash around and try very hard to get back to the surface and my brain was just on survival mode. I had no emotions or fear, as I was solely focused on breathing as much as possible when I was let up and attempting to break away. The intervals between her pulling me up and holding me down started getting longer and longer, and it felt like it was going on forever and I couldn't escape. Finally my mom came and ripped her off of me and chewed her the fuck out. It was so strange because minutes before the girl started drowning me, we were just playing games like tag and pretending to be mermaids. I don't know if she was retarded or a psychopath, but my mom always says that the girl had dead, empty eyes and was just staring at her unblinking as she was going off on her.

I had an ectopic pregnancy two years ago. I got pregnant two months after I had my son and I was freaking out. I found out while at the hospital for gallstones and pancreatitis. I immediately knew something was abnormal, because I had been spotting continuously, and I never did that with my son (I had ignored the spotting because I thought it was a weird period, since I had had a baby so recently). After I had gotten the gallstone removed from my bile duct, they sent an OBGYN to my room to talk to me. I mentioned the bleeding, and he said it was "implantation spotting". I asked him if he was sure, since it had been going on for a couple of weeks and was more like streaking than spotting, and he said it was fine (which is bullshit, and implantation spotting takes place way earlier than 8 weeks, which was where I was). Fast forward a few days later, I'm in the shower and have a dull, achy pain in my right pelvic region. It was uncomfortable, but not unbearable, but I knew that all the spotting plus one sided pain could mean an ectopic pregnancy. I rush to a different OBGYN, who does an ultrasound and sees no baby in my uterus, but instead in my fallopian tube. I am immediately rushed into surgery, and when I wake up the doctor is in my room, telling me I almost died as I had an insane amount of blood filling my pelvis. I at first was just relieved to be alive, but as time went on, I became very scared of being pregnant again. I was later told by the OBGYN that the pancreatitis had caused foPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Never had one but they may be real. I'm unsure but I'm open to consciousness being able to go beyond the brain or the idea of something like reincarnation. I fear the idea of eternity and I don't know if anything beyond materialism will ever be proven tbh

>>2686
>Strangely though this is considered no concern at all.
Why would it be a concern?
>So how do we figure out any of these big questions?
>We may decide it is simply out of our hands and consider the goal a futile endeavour but there very well could be another system of thought yet to be discovered that will give us the answers.
The system of thought you are looking for is faith and intuition based.
<but that's not reasonable or falsifiable!
You're the one making the assertion that reason can't explore these topics, by definition, this must mean the actual way to answer these questions must be unreasonable. If they weren't, they would be reasonable, and thus based in reason.
>Secular society has rebranded religion and fails to see it: this is certain.
Secular society has not rebranded religion, it never fully escaped the religious connotations that contained it. Take a look at the average atheists understanding of morality and you'll find it's either repackaged Christianity or maybe Buddhism if you're in the East. The only people who believe science replaced religion are the same brainlets who don't understand how epistemological philosophy works. People don't worship science these days the same way they worship the church.

>>2689
It does seem to be a waste of time to even bother trying to find out unless it brings a distraction and is a way to cope since that is the only reason we do anything at all.
Some things may truly be unknowable whethere we like it or not…

>>2690
>Why would it be a concern?
It is a concern because we are told by conventional authorities we can discover the truth by using science when this is not the case for all things as I mentioned.
I understand that even suggesting science may not provide answers results in a kneejerk reaction and has pejorative connotations that someone is stuck in the past controlled by mystic thinking.
The global consciousness for the most part is like a zoomer rebelling against the boomers.
>The system of thought you are looking for is faith and intuition based.
I did not mention theology yet this has the same problems as I mentioned already regaridng philosophy since it really is one in the same in many ways.

Why must the only way to explain that which cannot be explained using reason alone be theistic theories?
There could be an alternative system of thought as I mentioned yet to claim it is provable is unknown.

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>2691
>It is a concern because we are told by conventional authorities we can discover the truth by using science when this is not the case for all things as I mentioned.
1. Why do you care what conventional authorities think?
2. Even if you did care about what conventional authorities think, those same conventional authorities will, for the most part, never claim that science can give you those answers. See vid related at the 14:53 minute mark. Feynman being an incredibly noteworthy individual in Quantum Mechanics, breaks down why reasoning doesn't present new presmises, it can only test existing ones against each other. Welcome to fundamental epistemology.

Fuck, it requires a leap of faith to even believe other minds exist. Go read a critique of pure reason by the Kant goblin. Reasoning can not take anything A-priori which is what you are looking for.
>Why must the only way to explain that which cannot be explained using reason alone be theistic theories?
Because you are unable to see the forest for the trees. Theological theory is the end result of a different thought system, not the thought system in and of itself. Your argument is tantamount to saying the Theory of Relativity encapsulates all of reasoning as opposed to being a result from it.
>There could be an alternative system of thought as I mentioned yet to claim it is provable is unknown.
It's contradictory on a epistemological to derive a rational system to a non-rational system as they have a-priori standards for evidence and abstraction. If you just want to argue that something exists outside of reason (outside of observation or experience), then that already exists. I believe Kant would call it "Judgement", others would call it "Faith". It can not prove anything because it does not prove things in the way reasoning does, because by it's nature it is irrational. To want a system that can prove things, but is itself not rational, thus you are requesting something contradictory. Something that is not rational, but follows rational rules.

Now, if you are instead trying to explore the possibility of something that exists simultaneously outside rational reasoning and judgement/faith based methods of thought. Sure I guess, maybe it exists, but by the base principles you yourself have asserPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>2692
Yes you make some good points and essentially it leaves everything uncertain.
I am familiar with Kant.
bah I know a lot of people are aware of these limitations but have found in personal experience they are not.
Thanks for author recommendation may be good to read something other than pessimistic stuff for a change.
le brainfog hope my reply does not seem rude for being rather limited bahh

Thinking of how large the universe is and how it may be infinite and thinking of the nature of time scares the shit out of me

>>11806
Do not use Ouja boards at all to contact. My mentor is a medium and a lot of demons feed off your attention and have you guessing if you're searching for a family member. I know you want to contact spirits you DON'T know but advise please do not use Ouija!

I've had issues for years dealing with terrible paranormal activity both physically to my body & objects because I was stupid and had a sigil necklace as decoration above my bed. Removed it and although I do not have it often, I've been to a cemetary recently with some friends to kinda troll around and the same spirit that was latched onto me was the same one who was hurting me, I did get a lot of questions answered through those pendents (the ones you dangle from your hand), it was a cool experience though because the spirit attached to me is powerful it managed to fling my vape off my hand which was flat. Made me feel like I had telekinesis lmaooooo. Best advice is to use those pendent things because they are more safe. And probably go to a place that has a lot of spirit activity like abandoned buildings or cemeteries :)

>>11811
To add onto this, if you do go to abandoned buildings make sure you are safe incase of people coming in that have bad intentions. As well also you might find out that you have a passed on family member with you, if you start feeling that theres another energy in the room that isnt just you or others, then it's a family member. If at some point you feel really negative it's a spirit you don't know and potentially a bad one

It could help if you go to a place that was meaningful to them while they were alive

I hope this is relevant I don't know where else to ask… Will ghosts just float through space after the sun engulfs the earth? I mean, if there's life after death in that sense I assume it's eternal right? And ghosts are commonly believed to haunt certain places, so what happens when those places are gone? I mean the sun will engulf the earth eventually so will we all float through space as ghosts or what? Go to another planet? Won't it be far away? I would love answers from people who believe in them

>>11886
Most people who believe in ghosts believe there's a spiritual world they can go to when they want so I guess ghosts just hang there once the planet is fried. Some ghost believers also believe in reincarnation and believe you can go be reborn on other planets if you'd like. Maybe time works differently than we think and the planet isn't ever truly "destroyed" at least in the way we think. Thinking about it gives me anxiety though since it makes me wonder if anything we do on Earth matters since the cycle may just repeat again the exact same way

>>11671
I hate furries and know they groom the shit out of kids, but cub is the furry equivalent of loli/shota. I've not seen furries refer to minors in the fandom as cubs, I think that would be too on-the-nose creepy even for them.

>>11671
>>11673
>often pedophiles
That's any moid group tbh, not exclusive to furries.
I've always found moeblob pedos to be more numerous than anthro cub pedos, but that's probably because I'm in more anime spaces than furry spaces.
Idk about furries who are into actual animal depictions or animal-like pokemon though. I'd imagine those to be worse by default.

>>10117
>>11633
im not gonna lie this is amazing and genuinely the type of art that i aspire to create. the artist is obviously skilled and chooses to create in such a transgressive art style willingly.
>I need to know what happened to this person so they feel compelled to create such genuinely unsettling art
i draw simmilar art and to me it was life-long isolation. people treated me like filth my whole life so i began rejecting societys standarts for whats appropriate, and that included its standarts for what is "good" art. id post a few of my own pieecs but im skittish and dont wanna hijack the thread

>>11726
This is interesting. I made my favorite art back when I was crushingly lonely. I wouldn’t create a lot (depression) but I would have spurts where I couldn’t stop, and I made interesting stuff.
I don’t believe depression can make you a good artist, but it’s naive to say some people don’t find inspiration in it. If you have that uncontrollable drive to create art, it will come out in that. I did AP art with two other people. One of them was obviously mentally struggling (I picked her up when she ran away after a suicide attempt kind of struggling), but she never thought about her pain and so I don’t think she could conceptualize it enough to put it into art. The other just was an uber normie who couldn’t accept she was a normie, so tried to be edgy instead of just being herself. She made her entire portfolio about surface level pinterest stuff (like literally stole the ideas from pinterest). Mine was on isolation. IK I’m biased but the mentally ill girl and I’s portfolios were a lot more interesting … and I believe this is simply because we’d thought & experienced emotions in a different way. Sigh. I don’t want to believe depression makes better art .. but it can absolutely have an influence if you know how to wield it. There’s a reason all the best creative geniuses are crazy.

>>11827
this response is late as fuck so you probbaly wont see it but ill speak my mind anyway
>I would have spurts where I couldn’t stop, and I made interesting stuff.
same. it almost feels like a compulsion. sometimes i have all of those feelings bubbling inside of me and the only thing that helps is making art
>I don’t believe depression can make you a good artist, but it’s naive to say some people don’t find inspiration in it
ngl i think that you can only be a good artist if youre mentally ill. i think that art is always a form of escapism from a shitty life, and most mentally ill people have a shitty life by default, so they (we) are more prone to be the creative types. its not that art brings misety its that art is created out of misery. i genuinely have never met an interesting artist who wasnt mentally ill to some degree
>I don’t want to believe depression makes better art .. but it can absolutely have an influence if you know how to wield it
i agree, tho i dont have depression (i think?) but i suffer from a plethora of other stuff and being like that mentally puts you onto the edges of society and kind of opens your mind in a way. like it makes you find beauty/comfort in unusual things and thats what makes people who are fucked in the head interesting artists.

You feel guilty for giving him courage?

Nona you are cute as fuck. Don't feel guilty. He likes you.

>>11820
teach me your ways

I think ur super cool 4 this tbh…if u believe in that sort of thing it will come true…It's all about manifestation