/x/ - /x/

When I was younger I used to look at those suicide memorials about family people with children, loved ones, properties and jobs dying and I wondered why'd anyone do that? You have all this stuff to live for.

Now I kinda feel like these things indeed keep me going but there's still some sort of deep seated inadequacy I can't make sense of. I guess some of these people eventually just slip after being on the edge so long.

Fentanyl easily
Fentanyl is such an easy easy way to go. Its slipping into bliss and never waking up.

>>12359
Basically how I feel. You only get so long before you die and likely don't exist anymore anyways, may as well try to enjoy what you've got before surrendering to becoming nothing. Then that thought process makes me too sad and I circle back to wishing I could die so I could just get it over with

I tried some years ago, carbon monoxide poisoning was the method I chose and all I got was a BPD diagnosis and some antidepressants, so obviously it failed for me.
My wildest fantasy is to get assisted suicide where it's legal for people with BPD, but that's impossible because I respond well to meds and therapy, I must want to live after all.
But I still read this thread over and over, wondering if I could ever have the courage to try again.
I lost way too many loved ones to suicide and I wish I could see them again wherever people who kill themselves go.

>>12432
Don't leave us nona, you're stronger than that.
Think of the loved ones you lost. You won't see them again but you can live on and continue to remember them.

>>10623
came to this thread because i was curious to see if any other nonas were into subliminals kek.
ive been listening to them for maybe 3-4 years now off and on, i used to listen to them absolutely religiously like in my headphones all day on loop overnight etc etc.
while i feel like the appearance changing ones obviously dont work instantly, i really like using them anyways because i can atleast believe somethings changing (?) and i feel like they help to improve my mindset.
i also just like browsing through them and creating playlists and whatnot, i dunno

I like listening to subliminals about becoming Korean and stuff.

>>12375
Why Korean? K-pop?

>>12393
Probably that and that Asian people are generally considered to age better than people of other races. The fetishism is nasty to me though and I don't believe you can change race (I say that as a white individual who wishes she could be a POC)

most of it is deluding yourself into seeing any change, but I totally believe in the ones that focus on changing habits and behavior instead of physical features.

>>12424
Don't tell me this was the norm all along, it would be better if this was a trend, because trends end.

>>12425
Yeah, people have been killing their kids since the beginning of time. Wait until you find out most of the people doing that have been males.

>>12426
AI says rates are about the same.
It is a fact that single mothers are more likely to kill their children than single fathers, now couple that with increasing single motherhood rates (9% in 1960 to 25% in 2023) if this trend continues, it is only a matter of time until women surpass men at killing their children in overall statistics.

>>12424
>>12426
>>12428
Wow this is bleak. I know you unfortunately can't literally count every person who killed their families, crimes go unreported and people get away with shit, some are framed, so data should be taken with a grain of salt. That said, for as much as I hate scrotes I really wish people took women on women violence more seriously. I saw a common defense for the Lindsay shit was something along the lines of "there's been like 6 cases of men killing their families ever since the trial started" and yet you can find women doing the same if you know where to look, especially to their daughters. I wish people didn't claim it was fear mongering or moralfagging to point out there are sadly an uprise in cases of women partaking in scrote tier behavior. I still consider myself feminist/somewhat misandrist but I'm beginning to think it's just humanity in general that's the problem, not just one sex or the other, I know women committing crimes is underreported badly. I'll still stick up for women who are unfairly witch hunted

>>12428
single mothers are going to be implicated in more child deaths when they're greater in number than single fathers

>>12194
I have a complicated relationship with religion because of this subject honestly, deep time is scary

SCP stories have captured my fascination for almost a year now. I think i wouldn't even mind becoming D-class if it meant that i could witness something supernatural at least once before i die. I want to believe in magic and the otherworldly so bad. Witnessing something supernatural would give me hope, because otherwise nothing really matters to me, we're just mortals without purpose, just doing whatever that helps us not think about life and its finity, just wearing masks, and trying to forget that they're just masks. Succeeding at forgetting still would be a sad state of existence. I want to believe in immortality. Human life seems so fleeting that taking it seriously and putting in effort seems like a fool's errand. One moment we're learning to ride a bicycle and before you know it it is already time to depart.

>>12177
I believe it was the afterlife for everyone no matter what so it wasn't punishment, it was based on the Mormon hell though

>>12183
Both scare the shit out of me honestly, forever is a horrifying concept

I don't know how this doesn't scare more people, the concept of forever is like the main reason I'm scared of dying because it's so incomprehensible

Threw a knife at my brother because he made me mad..
He dodged it tho.

>>12386
Also forgot to mention but when i used to go to my grandma's house which was a few countries away from where i lived, she used to live in an old house that was litteraly decaying (my dad built her a new home), there used to be alot of flies flying by the windows and i used to corner these flies and grab them and start snapping their necks until their eyes litterally pops then i dismembered them all while i was acting like i was the slasher in a horror movie.
I was also acting the screams.

sending the luka magnotta video to some asian guy who blocked me during an argument over trannies before letting me finish my paragraph, i think

back when i was 17 told an ex i'll replace him eventually during a call in the first week of relationship. it was my first boyfriend and that though just slipped from my tongue.
he got extremely insecure in that relantionship since that phrase. he dumped me during a call after a year and a half.
later on, he reached out, first time i told him i was vulnerable due to a situationship, it seems those dms gave him hopes, then i forgot the convo forever.
when i started another serious thing with someone more mature a year or two later, he reach out asking me to be friends, told him i didn't need him and i dont care about him. he deleted his facebook after that and dindn't heard anything from this guy since then.

Me and my friend sent shock videos to someone because they asked me for nudes

>>12349
SEXY.

>>12349
UGLY.

Israeli spyware is a real thing, but it's developed by and built for people who are very wealthy. That shit can do a number on your phone and spy on everything, as long as you dont piss off someone rich or powerful it'll never be installed. Unless the US decides to force it like they were discussing earlier this year via Palantir. The variant of Israeli spyware that's well known and been around since the early 10's is called Pegasus. Pegasus spawned a series of copycats. Most people aren't going to be able to afford the price tag or cop a variant of this kind of spyware unless they're wealthy, or powerful hackers with friends in high places. But be warned that this type of monitoring software may become the standard

I ALWAYS accept cookies. Yum.

What happens when I click on a cloudflare site? Does Mossad/CIA place a cyberbug on my device?

>>12205
I for one am glad you remain in the realm of the living. I'm guessing it was some kind of anti-inflammatory medication. Do you have asthma?

>>12206
No it was for ADHD. Basically legal meth

>>6277
please tell us the name of the fic!

>>12260
Go back to the nasty image boards that allow this

When I was younger, a lot more unstable and in a very dark place mentally, I had a friend who was extremely loyal and beat the shit out of my dad when he abused me, managing to avoid leaving any evidence. When a sexually abusive boyfriend broke up with me after forcing me to spend all my savings, I honestly considered telling that friend that I was raped, knowing he'd do something a lot worse and would probably get away with it. Thankfully I stopped binge drinking long enough to realise how selfish and deranged that would be.

I steal ewaste from work all the time because they just throw perfectly good things away whenever. If it can fit in my backpack and it’s on the disposal pile, it’s coming home with me. Not especially expensive items, but some of them have been pretty useful. I have a really ancient spinny 1TB hard drive that I’m using for file backup. I just consider it recycling. You can’t even dumpster dive this stuff because they put it through some kind of grinder, you have to get it before it goes to the grinder. We’re moving to a new building soon and if it has CCTV, I guess I’ll stop.

used to all the time from big stores. loss prevention at most of these places now is wayyyy too serious for me to want to try anymore. not worth becoming a felon for multiple instances of pety theft.

went to the grocery store recently and accidentally put something in the bagging area that i didn't scan at self check out. immediately the machine started beeping and then played a recording from above of me putting the item in the bagging area… along with exactly what item it was. scared me straight for now lol

No but I really wanna do it I don't know how to get away with it though

Not shoplifted but stole money from a friend when I was like 11. It was $10 left on a table. I felt bad. Never got caught but also never confessed because I was (am?) a trash person. As far as I remember I never stole anything ever again.

I shoplifted a lot when I was 11 and stopped when I was 13 after getting caught. I started again occasionally in my mid 20s when I worked in a small shop when I knew I'd be able to get away with it.

>>12185
you mean like midievil?

no

yes, the signs are too clear to ignore

>>12188
what kinda signs

Time is infinite in both ways so it can't begin or end

>Do you believe in past life regression
I'm curious about it, because the idea of accessing memories from a previous life is almost haunting to me. I don't think our past lives, if they exist, even really belong to "us", since we've only ever known our current bodies and can't be pinned to our old actions. Perhaps this mentality would put a mental block in the way of any future attempt I make to go under hypnosis, but I have had a friend who's spiritually gifted share that she has recollections of things that did not happen to her, and left her with fears. It's interesting

>What's your thoughts on regressive hypnosis
Wouldn't this method be vulnerable to the power of suggestion? Doesn't being put into a vulnerable mental state and then pried with questions make it easier to hallucinate false interpretations of the truth?

>>12136
It's a very messy practice, I haven't experienced much of anything supernatural beyond some mild stuff I'm a bit iffy on. I'd do anything to believe in something kind of woo woo like this though. Reincarnation is a scary thought to me though, I don't wanna experience death over and over