I only had casual sex with my long distance bestie when we visited each other. We both were single and knew the opportunity wouldnt come up for a while, and we both didn't want to be seriously dating. Tbh she was very lonely and i wanted her to have a good experience since she mostly had creeps and ppl using her in past and not truly loving. I still talk and flirt with her often and nothing really changed from our friendship. With guys tho idk it feels weird and scary to think about that. I only did it with bestie because her and i are already so close so we felt safe with each other.

It's like any addiction. You start when you are young and dumb.

I didn't have a whole lot of casual sex but I've had a fuckbuddy or two before. I have an avoidant/anxious attachment style, hell, it's taking me a while to actually feel something for the moid I'm with. I always have walls and barriers up because I know I'm going to be left behind and I don't want to get hurt.

I have casual sex because I like sex. I don't like emotions. If you can't have sex with catching feelings, then casual sex isn't for you. That's fine.

>>129537
If you like sex, casual sex isnt for you. You need to get to know each others bodies first, likes and dislikes etc.

>>129475
moid hand typed this post.

I hate that any time I go into a new job thinkiing I'll be able to look like picrel but then either the dress code sucks, or I end up being too tired to put in effort at all.
it's been a month and I'm still hopping from job to a job hoping to find a somewhat balanced one because it's either too exhausting, too boring, or the uniform sucks, I know that's a silly reason to turn down a job tho
But since most jobs pay about the same, why would I stay at one where you can't even look cute

I feel like such a bitter loser. I went to Ikea last weekend to pick up a skillet and got there when it was full of happy younger couples picking out kitchenware, holding hands and shit. I just felt depressed for the rest of the day.

i’ve become pretty annoyed lately with how emotionally manipulative modern politics is. i generally wish there were forms of political content that were more academic, evidence-based, and did not resort to emotional manipulation. beyond politics, i’ve become aware of how emotional coercion is used in everyday conversation, both by myself, and other people.

there’s this trend of people ragebaiting others that, for a while, got on my nerves. i never really understood the point of spreading pointless conflict. but recently i realized that i myself tend to weaponize shame when others views did not align with my own moral values. the more i thought about it, the more i realized how this was produced out of my own desire to control others out of the belief it would protect my own interests. it was selfish in that sense and only really led to my own unhappiness. at the end of the day you can never really control other people’s thoughts and behaviors, and even if you could, that’s not really “them” so much as a reflection of your own authoritarian impulses.

i feel a rough rule for discerning between people who do respect your emotional autonomy and who don't is as follows: if you enter a conversation with a person emotionally stable, and leave it feeling ashamed, exhausted, pulled into conflict that didn’t initially involve you, or angry, especially in the form that leads you to feeling mobilized against others—all without progressing your views in some way that is productive—you are likely dealing with someone who is being emotionally coercive / is not respecting your emotional autonomy.

i generally feel like the world would be better if everyone just put a bit more effort into controlling impulses to emotionally manipulate. again, you can’t control others, but you can find people who get it and don’t resort to these tactics.

>>129542
also

grey rocking helps a lot with ignoring emotionally manipulative people

Femininity is lame, so you're doing something right.
Anyway, connection and closeness is not something so mystical and wonderful. I think if you got what you wanted you'd realise it's just "okay" and you'd be just as fine on your own.

i love you, internet stranger

im really wishing the best for you anon, i have been struggling with deep insecurities for years. all i can say is you have to try getting on the path to healing, it will take time but it will be worth it in the long run. please take care hugs

i struggled with this exact thing nona, and while it can come from a wide variety of places, what is important is understanding that there isn't necessarily one right way to be a woman. for a woman who isn't traditionally feminine like myself, it can feel like there's no place for you. this isn't true. the world is big and you are you, and that is exciting! there's a place for every kind of woman, and being patient with yourself while finding female friends will help open your eyes to this. it will get easier, i promise. take care

>>126444
It is ALL in how you see it. I don't see myself being penetrated; I see myself absorbing and swallowing the man's power within me. I don't see a blowjob as subservient but as using my power over him to make him beg for more. And surely a guy who goes down on you is acknowledging your dominance and practically worshipping you

Sex is YOU conqquering HIM - absorbing, engulfing, stealing his power

Tie him to the bed and blindfold him.
Now you can do what you want without any pressure. No female role, only your own desires at your own speed. You don't even need penetration.


>>129203
>And surely a guy who goes down on you is acknowledging your dominance and practically worshipping you
Make him deserve you. He show some devotion or he won't feel you.

>>129522
You don't need to be raped to do that, and you won't be getting money unless you extort him out of court.

>>126444
OP, if you are still here I think I can understand.

What you should do is to speak to your BF because you will get over it together or not at all.
Make him understand your problem and try to solve it, if for no other reason because otherwise he will stay dry.

The solution I propose is to have him be the receiving end. There is no need for penetration, play with him and tell him what to do.

If that is not reasuring enough, have him sexualized while you are not. Make him be naked for a full weekend, make him tell you how he value you as a person while you call him a walking dildo. This sort of thing will reasure you that you are not his lesser and that sex is neither humiliating nor submisive.

Question- does your friend care about how you're feeling? Enough to ask how you're doing? Basic empathy stuff.

Also, if he's just ramming it in without using foreplay or even lube, he hates you and is only using you for your youth. Do yourself a favor and leave before he baby traps you

>>129432
Not OP, but… uh oh… I met him when I was 18 and he was 25…

Being an ugly girl is like being dead but you still have to feed yourself and pay taxes.

my witch fren made an altar for me this full moon. not sure if it worked (or is working) or not but it's nice.

nona you should hire me

No, we have witches at home

No. Magic isn't real.

I also always wanted an obsessive bf but after self-reflection i realizedit's because of insecurity and a need for constant ego boosts. Growiing up with not enough attention and care from my parents makes me feel like if someone isn't unhealthily obsessive with me/not love bombing me means it's not love

>>129533
Napoleon usually wrote his letters while doing two or even three things at the same time. might have been geopolitic or diplomacy, or managing a network of spies. I wonder what else he did when writing this one.


>>129534
You do not want somebody who if fighting Austria half of the time as a BF.

I'm a wagie but it's all wfh since 2020 so it feels like being a bedrotting neet anyway, but also I have to do boring stuff all day. It's terrible

>>128736
Is this little guy dead? I hope so.

>>128738
No he's getting an x-ray under anesthesia. Also rude

Im a neet for like 10months now because i had one too many mental breakdowns working with my dad. I mostly try to help around the house and take care of myself. I cook, clean, talk with friends on discord game, make art, read, but ive been going out on walks to get some exercise and fresh air. I gotta get my resume updated and start applying but im afraid to.

fuck around on the pc, browse my phone, smoke pot, harass my cats. I do occasionally go out for walks at the park and I definitely plan on being more active in the summer

>>129407
>I decided to try and be normal
I think you did the opposite. You tried conforming to the abnormality in this world. Couldn't handle the loneliness, got swayed by temptations.

>the thought of him looking at another girl makes me physcially sick
same.

I use OF and streamers as a litmus test for men, because it's very telling about their online behaviour and relationship to women. Having multiple favourite streamers he religiously watches full streams of is obviously massively unhealthy, and if it's softcore porn or political slop reaction content, then all the worse. Paying any kind of subscription to a woman media personality is instantly a red flag and can't really be excused in the vast majority of circumstances. It's just admitting he sees sex as a transaction: he pays her money which gives him explicit approval, consent if you will, to use her for his pleasure, and allows him to make a claim to some small part of her body and life. There's a reason he's not just jerking off to free internet porn.

>I decided to try and be normal
You can still date while being weird, but it sounds like you're overcompensating by trying to date "normal" men, who are in fact degenerates that trawl dating apps and will take a shot at any woman, or vaguely woman-shaped thing, that lets them get close enough.

>>129407
there’s absolutely no reason your boyfriend needs to be following girls who stream on twitch for any reason. like ever… loser behavior. most women who stream on twitch are goon farming for simps. & i don’t really blame them cause men are pathetic enough to actually engage in this kinda stuff.. but yeah don’t ever let him try to convince you he’s not just following/engaging with these girls cause he finds them hot. cause that’s exactly what he’s doing.

You're not crazy for not wanting your boyfriend to have a digital harem
They will claim it's just goonslop to have a quick release but in reality they can't even stay hard during real sex because they trained to find a screen with tits in it more arousing than a real woman in front of them
I found that after porn became a global phenomena male sexuality became less distinctive and grounded as hetero/gay/bi, and more about dopamine chasing from increasingly taboo content or increasing amount of porn they expose themselves to.
After knowing that you might have a dissonance why some man who watches juggling black midget clown orgy porn still decides to date a straight woman. It's because they need an emotional pacifier and there's no better emotional pacifier than a straight woman.
Once you realize men are just slaves to quick hits of dopamine and use relationships for status and emotional labor from your part it all clicks and makes it so simple. it's really not because you're not goon material or your tits aren't big enough, it's just that your role in their life is mommying them and pacifying them and making them feel like they're not horrible people.
It doesn't make dating any less depressing though. We all still want to care and be cared for, while all men can offer is trauma

I hate dating too, i tried to find a guy through dating apps but theyre all terrible. Theyre either hot assholes that just wanna bang and forget about you, or some losers that have no confidence and are scared to flirt back. I had a guy i thought was decent and had everything going for him, except he wasn't very attractive to me. Not ugly but i just couldnt get myself to be into him. Maybe i really am only into girls